My Body-His (8 page)

How can I describe that moment? It felt surreal,
dreamlike, and, although I was scared out of my wits, at the same
time I was excited as never before. My stomach twisted and turned
because I knew what I owed him. I just wasn’t sure how he’d make me
pay. I decided on the way to the apartment door to keep an open
mind. He said I could end it anytime, I reassured myself. I held my
breath as he steered me through the door.

I don’t know what I expected, but an empty apartment
wasn’t on the list. Hardwood floors as far as the eye could see.
Standing inside the door, I could gaze straight through the living
room into the bedroom, where the sun cascaded through the back
window, illuminating the dust particles floating in the air. To the
left stood the kitchen and to my immediate right I could see
through a door into what looked like a half-bath. Further into the
apartment and to the right another door stood closed. I assumed it
was a second bedroom.

Luke told me to wait by the door. He walked around
the inside wall to the kitchen, and I heard the refrigerator door
open and close, then cabinet doors. I leaned forward and saw a
small ottoman in a space that should have held a dinner table. Luke
came back to the front door holding two glasses of white wine.

“
I thought you might like a glass of wine after
your workday. We have a lot to discuss and I’d like you to be
relaxed,” he said, pausing to take a sip from his glass. “We won’t
be staying here much longer but I did want to take care of the
matter of payment.” He took the wine glass from my hand and said,
“Please undress.”

I just stood, looking at him. Adrenaline coursed
through my body. I felt hot all over as it spread from my rapidly
beating heart to my limbs. A rush of wetness began in my folds as I
kept my eyes fixed on him. He held out his hand in a familiar
manner. I knew my choices. I took off my jacket and laid it in his
outstretched palm. Self-consciously unbuttoning my blouse, I felt a
chill run up my back as I slipped it off my shoulders and draped it
over his arm. Next I stepped out of my shoes, postponing exposing
more of myself right away. When I looked up, the intensity in his
eyes made my heart skip a beat. How do I explain that in that
moment two contrary thoughts—no, more like sensations—rushed
through me?

Jane, run!

And ….

Jane, you’ve made it home, finally
.

My arousal won out over my practical nature that day
and the idea of running away seemed crazy. Quickly ridding myself
of the rest of my clothing, I handed it over to Luke.

“
Jane,” he said, “this is how I expect you to
be in this apartment at all times. You should step through the
front door and disrobe immediately. If we are going out you will
dress at the last minute in the bathroom to the right. The same
goes for work in the mornings, although I’m not sure how much
longer you’ll be going to work. We can talk about that
later.”

Luke slowly and deliberately walked to the bathroom
and placed my clothes on top of the toilet seat cover. I still
hadn’t moved. I felt another shiver convulse my body. He clasped my
hand and directed me to the ottoman.

“
You need this, Jane,” he said, looking at the
ottoman and then back at me. “You need to know what I expect so you
can avoid this happening again. My guess is that you not only need
this, but want it too.”

He put pressure on my shoulder to make me drop to my
knees; then he gently pushed my body forward so that I was draped
over the ottoman. When he knelt down he placed something under my
knees to cushion them and began tying my thighs to the back legs of
the ottoman. He moved around in front of me and tied my wrists to
the stunted front legs. The ottoman didn’t shift or move.

If I had thought my adrenaline maxed out before, I
now knew the difference. I was so turned on at that point that I
panted. My heart beat loudly in my ears, a cacophony of fear and
thrill. I had never been so confused.

I couldn’t see Luke but I could hear his footsteps,
and then, what sounded like a key unlocking a door. I tried to look
behind me to identify his intensions but as much as I strained I
couldn’t twist far enough around. He found whatever he’d been
searching for quickly and returned to my side.

“
Try to relax, Jane,” he whispered to me as he
trailed his hand slowly down my back, over my butt, and down my
thighs. Shivers cascaded down my body, leaving me even more
aroused. The fear I’d felt earlier was gone. It seemed strange,
given the circumstances, but I thought he was right: I needed
this.

Close to my ear, he whispered, “I will start now.
There will be ten. The next time I need to discipline you, expect
twenty.” I heard a whoosh through the air and a resounding smack as
the belt made contact with my butt.

It stung. It burned, too, but then it felt almost
pleasant. I thought that I might actually enjoy the experience
until the second one fell ….

“
God help me,” I screamed and began squirming
against the ropes.

“
Jane,” he said sternly. “You must stay still
or I will start over. Are you going to settle down?” He spoke the
last words louder, for emphasis.

Then I was really concerned. Where had the fear been
when I needed it, before he’d tied me down?

Clearly I’m crazy.

“
Are you ready Jane? Eight more to go if you
keep still.”

I stayed perfectly still and felt the wind pass by
me, thwack!

“
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh, oh, oh,”
I yelled as the pain burned through me. By this time, I realized
that the stinging from the second crack of the strap still
lingered, amplified by the third strike.

“
I can see we are going to get a lot of the
rules out of the way right now. You can moan, yell and scream all
you want, but no words. So that was three, seven to go.”

I wanted to yell, “Just get it over with, I can’t
take the waiting,” but he must have sensed my frustration. He took
a leisurely stroll around me to the other side before whipping me
again.

“
Ooof, oh, fuuuu—” I screamed, uttering a
string of curse words in my head.

Then the lashes came at a steady pace. Having them
closer together didn’t help matters. I screamed and yelled, but
somehow managed to stay still. I felt the belt crisscross my
backside. The sting and pain from each hit remained as he applied
more stripes. By the time he finished, a layer of sweat covered me.
I felt as I did after a long run, with the addition of a burning,
uncomfortable ass. I was exhausted and angry. Really, I flamed
livid. I just lay there—not that I could have moved—trying to catch
my breath and figure out what to do next. I expected him to untie
me but instead he lightly touched my buttocks. And, even though my
head was mired in confusion, my traitor of a body responded to his
touch. He spread my folds and there found a copious amount of
wetness. How could my body betray me that way? I was angry,
helpless and excited all at the same time. As an experience, this
was totally new.

He trailed one hand all along my body while the other
explored my labia. He pulled on my nether lips, increasing my
desire and wetness, causing me to arch my back. I could feel my
anticipation growing, my heart pounding, my breathing quickening,
and the moisture trailing down my thighs. By simply spreading my
lips apart, he had brought me close to orgasm. A lust to be taken
surged through me as his hands fondled my buttocks and then moved
below, caressing my hips, running a lone finger through my wetness
before stopping. I craved more and wondered why he left me
unattended, but then I could hear him removing his pants. Soon he
had sidled up behind me, causing my hips to move backward against
my restraints.

Though my body betrayed me again, this time I didn’t
care. I only wanted him inside me, filling me. I gritted my teeth
and heard a primal animal groan tear through me. Having brought me
to a frenzy, he finally inserted his large erection, inspiring
guttural sounds I hadn’t known I was capable of. It didn’t hurt the
way I thought it would to have him pounding against my reddened,
beaten ass. In fact, as I became even more aroused, he elicited
groans from the depths of my being. He reached under me and
concentrated once again on my clit. I began thrashing about as much
as the ropes would allow, groaning and moaning in pleasure.

“
I knew you would enjoy this,” he whispered
into my ear, his face pressed against my cheek. “I have so many
plans to bring you to higher and higher realms of passion. All you
have to do is trust me, give your body to me, and follow my lead.”
He pushed his body tightly against mine with unmistakable force and
strength, letting me know in no uncertain terms that he was the
master and I was there to serve him. I lay there, completely at his
mercy.

Luke clearly meant to take over my body and make my
body, his. My body-his? I wanted to resist, but the sheer pleasure
of that moment made all my earlier doubts disappear. I climaxed
with such force I thought I would break through the ropes that
bound me. As my body shook from my release, he continued to slam
into me from behind with abandon, his balls slapping against my
aroused clit in steady rhythm. I could hear my vagina sucking on
his cock, along with his loud gasps of breath, as he drove in and
out. Feeling him enlarge against my walls, I knew his release would
fill me with more than just pleasure. A moment later he pounded
more furiously as the lion’s roar began to rumble in his chest and
he shot his hot load into me, filling me until his cum flowed past
my lips and down my sensitive thighs.

Fighting tears, I took a deep breath and sighed out
slowly as he lowered his body to cover mine. His heart beat rapidly
against my back.

We lay like that for a few minutes until he pushed
himself up, slowly stroking my back and buttocks as he withdrew. He
began untying each of the ropes that kept me secured to the
ottoman. Helping me up onto my shaky legs, he turned me around into
his embrace. At that moment I began to cry uncontrollably. The
tears poured down my face, onto his shirt, and down my chest. The
sobs wracked my body with such force that Luke had to physically
hold me up. When they finally subsided, I looked up at him.

He kissed each of my eyelids, tasting my tears.

“
We have much to talk about but I imagine
you’re hungry as well. Off to the bathroom,” he said, shoving me on
my way.

I understood him to mean that I should dress again.
Shutting the door behind me, I gathered my clothes and placed them
on the edge of the sink. I sat on the toilet, trying to collect
myself. I expected my movements to cause me discomfort as I
dressed, but there seemed to be no residual pain from the ordeal.
Once dressed, I felt brave enough to look at myself in the mirror,
but scared of what my eyes, looking back at me, would tell. To my
surprise, they looked soft and happy. I smiled at myself and left
the bathroom.

Luke handed me my wine glass and I finished what
remained. “Thanks,” I said.

He took my glass, placed it on the floor by the door,
pulled me into his arms and held me. I felt at peace—a sensation
that in retrospect completely baffles me.

He led me onto the street and we walked to a
restaurant on the opposite side. “I’ve heard this place is good,”
he said, leading me to a booth in the back. “Would you like me to
choose?” he asked.

I shook my head and said, “No, thank you.” I smiled,
gazing into his eyes, and then I glanced at the menu placed in
front of me. I felt encouraged that he’d asked about ordering for
me that time. Perhaps I still had some say when it came to moving
in with him.

After we placed our orders, Luke started laying out
the plan.

“
I am looking for a strong, independent woman.
You’ll make all decisions with regard to your life but one. When it
comes to your body, everything pertaining to your pleasure and mine
is entirely up to me. You’ll have no say-so. You will essentially
be giving your body over to me for my use.”

I raised my hand but pulled it down quickly, feeling
ridiculous. “What if I don’t want you to do something you want me
to do?”

“
You always have the option of leaving. We will
come up with a safe word or phrase that you can say when you want
out.”

“ ‘
Out,’ as in the relationship is over?” I
said.

“
Yes, exactly,” he said, leaning back farther
in his seat. “When you decide to give me your body it will be on my
terms, not yours. I promise you that I will never do anything to
hurt you permanently. The only exception would be a tattoo or
piercing … and those heal.”

“
So let me get this straight …. For us to
have a relationship it has to be on your terms? You aren’t willing
to consider anything else?”

“
There aren’t any other terms for you and me,
Jane. You need this. You’ve needed this for a long time. We have
finally found each other and we will have a great life together.
This is how it has to be.”

“
I was barely able to make it through today,” I
said, indignantly.

“
Please, Jane,” he said, laughing. “Were you
hurt so badly I wasn’t able to fuck you from behind? I’m pretty
sure you enjoyed yourself. You can take much more than that … and
will. I have a question for you: have you ever cum as hard as you
did tonight?” he said with a knowing smirk. “Well, tell me, have
you?”

“
No, but—”

“
But nothing. This is just the beginning,
Jane,” he said. “Let’s just finish dinner and you can go back to
your place and think about it. If you decide to stay with me, you
will show up at our apartment at nine a.m. sharp tomorrow morning.
We will review the rules on the way back to your car.”