The Book of Revenge (13 page)

‘Yeah, bone melting isn’t it. Sure he cares. Sure he trusts and respects me, and actually I think he does love me as a friend. But I want what you see on the dance floor. I want that love...’ she laughed sadly. ‘But I’m not going to get it. Sometimes I think he’s afraid, scared of the potential between us.’

Liz could relate to that feeling. It was strange and new and definitely frightening. She knew that love, as in that irrational passion that could render a sensible person senseless, had no place in her life. Maybe Phillip felt the same. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said with feeling.

Dawn shrugged her shoulders, a resigned and slightly sad expression on her face, ‘anyway what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at work?’

‘I should, but I have a few things that need to be done. You got half an hour?’

‘Of course.’

Liz led the way from the dancing studio to the modern shopping center. Milltown was far more progressive and prosperous than Bidbury. She stopped at a door and Dawn looked up at the name plate.

‘A solicitors? Liz, what’s going on?’

Matt pulled into his parking space at the station. He was late. He’d spent a long time under the shower at home, playing and re-playing the previous night’s events. How had it all gone wrong? Or was it just that it had all moved to quickly for Liz? That’s what her daughter seemed to think.

He climbed out of the car, the national news teams had set up camp. Bidbury was certainly on the map now.

Jen was flushed and excited.

‘Anything useful back from forensics yet?’ He asked, as soon as he entered the office.

‘Expected later today.’ She said waving a card at him. ‘You saw them out there? The nationals! A reporter from The Sun gave me this...’

Matt stopped walking. ‘You spoke to them?’

Jen quickly picked up on his tone and adopted an attitude of her own. ‘Well obviously not about the case.’

‘No, you’d never be so unprofessional as to talk to the press.’

She frowned, but her spirits were too high to be dampened by him. He could almost see her calculating the odds for promotion with such a high profile case. ‘He did give me this though and made all sorts of suggestions about what he’d pay for a scoop.’

Matt took the card. ‘I don’t need to tell you what damage talking to...’ he looked at the card... ‘Del Carter would do to your career.’

‘No, Gov you don’t. But I do have some leads.’ She sat down one side of his desk and waited until he was sat opposite her. Then she handed him a file. ‘Two of the dead men used the same double glazing company and although one of them was five years ago the company still have the name of the fitter who did the job. And guess what?’

‘It was the same man.’

‘Yep, but James hadn’t had a new door or double glazing. But...’ she looked at him excitedly. 

Matt was tiring of her game but he was trying to be patient. ‘But?’ he asked obligingly.

‘He was broken into about three years ago and a locksmith turned up the same day to fit a new lock...’

‘OK.’

‘Well, the locksmith said the insurance company had sent him. Since James didn’t have to pay, he was happy enough to go along with it. But...’

‘Ok, enough with the but’s. Just tell me.’

Jen looked like she was a five year old who had just been scolded. Matt was immediately sorry. ‘Tell me,’ he repeated in a more patient tone.

‘James' wife or ex as she is now, pointed out that they didn’t have insurance, said they had nothing worth nicking.’

Matt absorbed the information. ‘So why didn’t they question it, or even tell the police?’

‘Why would they? They got a free new lock. Only thing James was worried about was that the man might return for payment.’

‘So do we know who this free fitter is?’

Jen smiled triumphantly. She held the ace.

‘We do. James’ wife asked for a card and he actually gave her one. It’s the same man that worked for the glazing company, doing a bit of freelancing.’

Jen pointed to the file on the desk. ‘It’s all in there.’

‘An address?’

‘Yep. It’s a house in Milltown, about forty miles away.’

Matt picked up the file and stood up. ‘I’ll go see him.’

‘Not much point Gov. He’s dead.’

A nagging thought was growing, taking shape and form and scaring the hell out of him.  ‘I’ll go anyway, talk to the neighbours, and see what I can find out.’

Jen waited until he was almost at the office door. Then she called him. ‘Oh and gov...’

He turned. ‘Yes?’

‘It seems that all of the victims were members of the same youth rugby team.’ She picked up a copy of the local newspaper and there it was on the front page. A copy of that winning team with the victim’s heads circled in blood red.

Their eyes locked and held. Matt walked out.

Liz walked Dawn back to the dance studio. ‘Thanks for that,’ she said.

Dawn looked serious and worried. ‘Sure, anytime.’

‘It’s just a precaution. I need to know that if anything happens to me then she’ll be alright.’

Dawn didn’t look reassured.

‘Just promise to always be there for her.’

Dawn nodded her head, she was fighting back tears. ‘Liz? You’re scaring me.’

‘Just promise.’

‘I promise. Of course I do.’

Satisfied Liz hugged her friend. ‘And you’ll do the other thing?’

Dawn nodded, curiosity and worry on her face.

Liz smiled with as much reassurance as she could fake, then she left forcing herself not to turn and look back.

She drove home deep in thought. She knew what she had to do. She stopped at the cemetery and walked across the damp grass to the grave stones. She looked down at them and spoke quietly. ‘I’m so sorry Mel, I’ve let you down.’ She turned to the grave beside her sister's, ‘we worked so hard Steve, to get it right, but I’ve failed. I’ve failed you both.’

A shadow fell across the stones. She spun around. It was her mother. ‘What are you doing here?’

The elderly lady laid a bunch of flowers on Melissa’s grave. ‘she‘s my daughter.’

The anger inside Liz exploded. ‘No! You put her there. You killed her.’

The old lady stood her ground. She looked sad and hurt, but it was clearly an old argument and an old accusation. ‘Beth, you have to let it go.’

‘How can I let it go? She’s dead; you made her feel dirty, guilty and ashamed.’

The old lady sighed. ‘Yes and I have to live with that. I have to forgive myself because that’s the only way I can face each day.’

‘Well, I don’t forgive you.’

Liz’s mother shook her head sadly. ‘I know Beth, and that’s your tragedy.’

The old lady walked away, every step an effort. 

Liz sank down onto the grass and closed her eyes as the memories filled her head.

The young Liz and Melissa were helped into the front room by Steve. They were both in a terrible state. Emotionally numbed and physically battered. Cuts, bruises, dried blood, torn clothes.

‘We’ve gotta call the police.’ Steve said to their mother as she fussed over them with disinfectant and gauze.

‘No.’ their mother said.

Steve looked at her with disbelief. ‘But they’ve been raped.’

Their mother was dabbing at Liz’s cuts with Dettol. ‘Look at them.’ She said as she carried on dabbing. ‘What will it be like for them? Tests, questions and examinations, the men will say they asked for it, consented to it. It’ll be their word against the men’s. Who are the police going to believe?’

Steve was holding Melissa. But Melissa was sat stiff and unresponsive just staring at nothing. ‘They’ll believe us.’ Steve said.

‘You were there? You saw it?’

‘Well no, but...’

Mother shook her head. ‘Two girls, dressed to show off what they’ve got, out late, drunk…’

Steve jumped up, he was furious. ‘No! It’s not like that. The bastards can’t get away with it.’

Mother opened a tube of Savlon antiseptic cream and gently patted it onto Liz’s cuts. It stung, but she was still too shocked to respond to any stimuli, even pain.

Steve grabbed the phone. ‘I’m calling the police.’

Suddenly Melissa snapped out of her unresponsive state. ‘No!.’ she said forcefully.

‘But...Mel…’

‘No.’ She said again, emotionless and without looking at him. ‘Mum’s right.’

Steve punched the door with frustrated fury. Melissa finally lifted her eyes to look at Steve and then at Liz. 

Liz flinched when she saw the terrible burning pain and humiliation in her older sister’s eyes.

‘We tell no one.’ Melissa said. She paused to make sure they were listening. ‘Ever.’

Liz pulled a tissue from her bag, she wiped her eyes and blew her nose, and then she stood up, she looked down at the two gravestones. ‘Goodbye.’ She said, before hurrying back to her car. She paused, key in hand, her mother was clinging to the railing that circled the cemetery, looking as though she could hardly hold herself up.

Something shifted inside of Liz, a stirring of compassion. She took a few steps forward, then stopped as her anger and pain tried to resurface. Torn, she stood still while the internal battle played out. Then her mother stood up, took a clean lace hanky from her handbag, dabbed her eyes and blew her nose.

Liz remembered those hankies. Her mum always had a pile of them in her dressing table drawer. They were bleached and ironed, carefully folded and smelt of lavender. As a child she had one tucked under her pillow at night.

‘Mum…’ the sound escaped her lips, barely more than a whisper.

Her mother turned.

Liz didn’t know how to take the step that could build a bridge between them, but her mother did and with age defying agility the lady closed the gap and pulled Liz into a tight sob soaked hug.

‘I didn’t do it.’ Avril said.

‘I know.’ Matt replied and realised he believed it.

‘Am I in the clear now?’

She was looking at him with a mixture of hope, pain and panic, he wanted to reassure her, but he knew that he had to be honest. ‘Not quite. It’s all circumstantial and there’s not enough to charge you…’

‘But I’m still a suspect?’

‘Yes, I’m sorry.’

Avril shook her head. Matt had never seen his wife so scared. He wished he could offer her comfort, but those days were behind them. He looked around the room, ‘this is nice,’ he said lamely. She was staying at a friend’s, he had no idea what friend, and it certainly wasn’t any of their mutual ones. He didn’t want to ask, not about her friend, or about her job, or lack of it, or about how they had reached the point where awkward silence sat between them. But he knew there was something he had to ask her again. ‘Who’s Ted?’

She lifted her head and stared at him, he thought she was going to refuse to answer but then she started to cry. ‘He was my baby.’ She said.

It was Matt’s turn to be surprised; he almost thought he had misheard.

‘I got pregnant when I was just fourteen,’ she said, silent tears running down her face, ‘my parents made me have an abortion.’

‘Shit. I’m so sorry…’

‘I never forgave them. As soon as I was sixteen I moved here to Bidbury to live with my Gran.’ She laid her hand on her flat stomach. ‘I called my unborn baby Teddy, but the truth is I never even knew if it was a boy or a girl.’

Matt stared at the woman he had married almost seven years ago and realised that he didn’t know her at all. She had carried the secret through the years of friendship and dating, then on into marriage, with never a word, nor a hint. Was he blind and stupid or was it simply that he had never cared enough to look beyond the surface of her perfect and poised facade? Or was the truth that protecting his own deep dark secret kept everyone outside his personal exclusion zone, including his wife.

He walked across the room, sat down beside her and took her into his arms, ‘I’m so sorry,’ he said, ‘for everything.’

Matt left the house and walked slowly back to his car. Whatever lingering doubts he had about his wife’s guilt were gone. He had his own theory, an idea that had been forming in some corner of his brain, despite his best efforts to ignore it. It had to be faced and it might as well be now. He climbed in his car and headed out of town.

Liz knocked on Sam’s door before she entered. Sam was lying on her bed, earphones in, listening to music. Liz watched her daughter for a few seconds until Sam opened her eyes and saw her standing there. Sam pulled the headphones out and sat up smiling.

‘I’ve got to go out tonight. Will you be OK?’

‘Sure. Craig’s coming over in a bit. Are you seeing Matt?’

Liz shook her head. ‘No, I have to work.’

‘OK. But, mum...’

‘Yes.’

‘He’s alright you know. I like him.’