Authors: Rosemary Smith
‘And this is Megan, Mrs Alexander,’ said the housekeeper. I could sense she was fond of the girl who was about twenty.
‘I’m pleased to meet you, mistress,’ Megan said in a sweet Welsh accent, dropping me a curtsey at the same time.
‘Megan is to be your personal maid mistress, she has many skills and is a friendly soul if this suits you,’ enquired the housekeeper.
‘I would be delighted, Megan,’ I agreed, not wishing anyone to know I had not had a maid before.
‘And I am Derrick Alexander.’ A masculine voice from behind me startled me and I turned to see a tall man similar in stature to my husband Kieran and I guessed this to be the brother he had talked of. While Kieran was quiet his brother exuded friendliness his blue eyes dancing with merriment.
‘I’ve heard a lot about you,’ I said foolishly for I had no idea of what to say to anyone, I felt I had been thrown into a den of lions although the welcome I had been given was friendly enough.
‘All good I hope,’ said Derrick taking hold of my gloved hand and kissing the back of it and I thought once more that my bridegroom had not yet kissed me not even on this, our wedding day.
‘And I am Kerensa Templeton.’ Looking over Derrick’s shoulder I could see the beautiful young woman who had spoken. She had not been in the hall when we arrived for I would not have missed her, her flaming red hair cascaded down the back of her emerald green silk cloak, underneath which she wore a matching dress, the bodice so tight at the waist it accentuated her perfect figure. I suddenly felt inadequate and hated this woman on sight as she looked me up and down, her green eyes flashing. Without a second glance in my direction she swept past me and headed for my husband whose face held a wary expression, but nonetheless his eyes lit up with pleasure at the sight of her.
‘Kieran, darling!’ enthused Kerensa, taking both my husband’s hands in hers and kissing him on both cheeks. ‘It is so good to have you back, Derrick has been a complete bore and won’t go riding with me along the beach,’ she complained beautifully.
‘I don’t think any of us will be riding for a while,’ Derrick said, annoyance in his voice. ‘There is a blizzard raging outside which could last for days.’
‘How convenient,’ Kerensa expressed her displeasure and slipped her arm through that of my husband. ‘At least you are back, dear Kieran, that’s all that matters to me.’ She tossed her head, her hair rippling luxuriantly down her back, it was as if I wasn’t there. I felt the tears well up in my eyes.
‘You will join us for dinner?’ asked Derrick.
‘I think not,’ I replied as I glanced at the beautiful but arrogant Kerensa Templeton. ‘What I need is an early night.’
‘Let me take you to your room,’ interrupted the kindly housekeeper, ‘for I can see it is rest you need, and we will have some refreshment sent up to you. Come now.’
I had not expected Kieran to be so indifferent to the fact that I had just become his wife, and I certainly hadn’t expected him to be so attentive to the most lovely woman I had ever set eyes on. Even Justine had disappeared and I set to wondering if she had been disappointed by her brother’s bride.
By the time we had walked along the wide corridor my whole body shivered with the cold and as Mrs Burnet ushered me into my room, tears were streaming down my face; unwilling tears for I had not wished to cry in front of anyone.
‘There child,’ the housekeeper soothed placing her arm around me and drawing me towards her ample bosom, ‘you cry, let it out.’ And I did, tears of pity for myself and the situation I had placed myself in. I had married without any mention of love and Clarissa’s words came back to me, ‘But you hardly know him, Barbara.’ Suddenly I pushed myself away from Mrs Burnet’s warm embrace, catching my hand on the keys at her waist causing them to jangle. I laughed and sobbed at the same time.
‘I must make the most of this,’ I said to Mrs Burnet, my tears subsided and I pulled myself up straight with determination, looking around at my surroundings. ‘What a beautiful room.’ I gasped, my tears forgotten as I looked around me. The drapes at the windows and around the huge four-poster bed which dominated the room were of red-coloured velvet, and crisp white sheets peeped over the red counterpane on the bed which looked inviting to one as weary as I.
‘I’m so pleased, mistress, ‘tis the master bedroom, where all the Alexander heirs have slept,’ she informed me bustling over to a beige curtain in one corner of the room and as she drew it back I could see it had concealed a hip bath. ‘Now I’ll get some water sent up and we’ll get you into a nice warm bath.’
As soon as she spoke Mrs Burnet removed my cape, draping it over a small chair which stood by the window and then she bade me to sit on a comfortable beige-coloured armchair which was drawn up to the fire. Sitting down I put my feet on the fender and bent to remove my boots while the housekeeper went off on her mission for water. I was warming my hands by the fire and feeling more relaxed than I had all day when there was a knock on my door. My heart thudded thinking it was my husband, but surely he wouldn’t knock.
‘Come in.’ I called in as strong a voice as I could muster. The door opened to reveal a pleasant-looking middle-aged man who had brought up my portmanteau.
‘Where would you like it, mistress?’ he asked in a kindly Welsh brogue.
‘Somewhere by the wardrobe, please,’ I answered, pointing to the large mahogany wardrobe which stood against a wall by the window.
‘There you are,’ he said as he placed my possessions where I had indicated. ‘I’m David, the housekeeper’s husband, if there’s anything I can do for you, you have only to ask.’
‘Thank you, David, that’s very kind of you, I’ll remember it,’ I assured him.
The water for my bath was brought up and I sank thankfully into the warmth of it. Megan helped me out, wrapping me in a fluffy white towel, luxuries I had never been used to and I recalled the cracked jug and bowl I had washed in at my lodgings, quite often with cold water.
‘Are you to dress in your nightgown, mistress?’ asked Megan as I dried myself.
‘Yes, I think that is the best course to take.’ I agreed, although I did now feel more alert.
‘Is it all right for me to unpack your luggage?’ my maid asked.
‘Why yes, but I’ve not much to unpack as you will see,’ I replied somewhat ruefully.
‘The master’s first wife had little when she first arrived, but if she’s anything to go by you’ll have a wardrobe full of pretty things before too long.’
Megan’s words drifted across to me and stopped me in my tracks.
‘The master’s first wife?’ I said with some astonishment, reiterating my maids words. ‘So my husband has been wed before?’ I asked with great interest.
‘Yes indeed. I’m sorry mistress, I thought you knew.’ Megan apologised, an anguished look on her face.
‘No matter,’ I soothed for I could see the girl was quite distraught. ‘I’m glad you told me for I would have learned of it soon enough.’
Megan had taken my best white lawn nightdress out of my bag, I had pressed it only this morning when I had high hopes of a happy wedding day. But since our arrival at Rowan Castle the day had not gone well, indeed not, and as Megan slipped the nightgown over my head and fastened the pearl buttons I tried not to anticipate how my wedding night would fair.
Sitting at the dressing table, Megan brushed my long straight golden brown hair until it shone. The reflection which looked back at me was pleasant enough, but I had not one ounce of the beauty Kerensa Templeton possessed. At the thought of her I felt angry at the way both she and my husband had acted as if I weren’t there, as if I hadn’t this very day married the master of Rowan Castle.
‘What was the master’s first wife called?’ I asked Megan, startling the girl as the only sound in the room for some time had been the logs crackling on the fire.
‘Annabel,’ was Megan’s short answer.
‘And what happened to the first Mrs Alexander?’ I asked quietly, needing to know more about my predecessor.
‘It’s not for me to say, mistress,’ the girl answered quietly, the hairbrush still in her hand. ‘The housekeeper would be the one to ask.’
‘Very well, Megan, but you can see I have a right to know,’ I said, meeting her eyes in the mirror.
‘Oh yes, you certainly have and I hope you find out soon,’ she said, as a look of sympathy mirrored in her lovely brown eyes. ‘I’ll unpack the rest of your things now if that’s all right with you?’ she asked of me.
‘Thank you, Megan.’
I was very interested in my husband’s first wife and I set to wondering if the reason he had been so aloof to me since we had arrived at Rowan Castle was because he felt a traitor to her memory. But my instinct was that he was head over heels in love with the beautiful Kerensa. Whatever the situation my intention was to find out exactly where she fitted into the scheme of things at Rowan Castle. I chided myself, I must be tired to even think these things about my beloved Kieran.
After my maid had left I crossed over to the window and pulled back one of the heavy curtains. Snow had started to bank up on the window pane, but over it I could see the blizzard still driving down and the white landscape looked like a huge cake topped with icing sugar. Swiftly I drew the curtain back in place, the whole scene causing me to feel cold once more.
For a little while I sat by the fire thinking of the day’s events, it all still felt like a dream, our wedding, the castle, its inhabitants and the heavy snowfall all seemed unreal and for an instant Derrick’s smiling face appeared in my mind.
I glanced at the clock on the mantle which showed the time to be nearly midnight. Would my bridegroom come to me or was he with the lovely Miss Templeton? I blew out the candle on the table by my chair and climbed between the crisp white sheets, my honey brown hair spread on the snow white pillow. By the candle light I looked around the room lying expectantly waiting for some time, but as I suspected Kieran did not appear. I couldn’t honestly say if I was relieved or disappointed, but whatever I felt it would appear for tonight at least I was to sleep in the marriage bed alone.
I awoke refreshed the next morning after a surprisingly good night’s sleep in the comfortable four-poster bed. Megan was already in the room, she had lit the fire and drawn back the heavy curtains to reveal a watery sunlight casting its ray across the carpeted floor. I got out of bed with a resolution to be strong today and face my husband with a clear and firm determination. Little did I know this was to be easier said than done.
As I slipped out of bed I noticed things I had not seen the previous evening. To one side of the bed I observed a doorway draped with a red curtain which hung from a brass pole.
‘Good morning, mistress,’ Megan distracted me, It’s a better morning, at least the snow has stopped falling,’ she said in a cheery voice, at her words I stepped over to the window. The snowfall had indeed ceased, the whole countryside was covered in a blanket of white as were the mountains beyond. I walked back to the fire warming my hands in front of the blazing coals.
‘I need to look my best today, Megan,’ I said, turning to her as she poured water from a jug into the china bowl.
‘We’ll make you fit for a king,’ replied Megan, throwing me a beautiful smile and I set to thinking she must know I slept alone, but I felt I couldn’t breach the delicate subject with her, to me it was embarrassing and I needed to know the young woman better before I could confide in her.
Megan had just finished twisting my hair into a knot and securing it with pins when Justine walked in.
‘I’ve come to take you down to breakfast, Barbara,’ she said. All the while glancing around the room, her eyes resting on the marital bed. It was plain for her to see that only one side had been slept in. ‘Run along Megan please, I wish to talk to your mistress.’
Megan did as she was bid and Justine waited until the door had closed behind her before she spoke again. ‘All is not well is it, Barbara?’ As she spoke Justine looked at me expectantly, waiting for an answer.
‘No, it is not,’ I said calmly moving away from the dressing table.
‘What is amiss? For Kieran has been in the library since six o’clock this morning.’ As she spoke she glanced again at the four-poster and then back to me.
‘In truth, Justine, I don’t know what is amiss,’ I answered her, looking out over the landscape.
‘I will not interfere, for now at least,’ Justine began, ‘we shall go down to breakfast and then I will show you around your new home. We are to hope that things will improve and...’ Here she looked me up and down. ‘You look charming, but as soon as the snow disappears we will take a trip to Llanberis to see Mrs Harding the local dressmaker.’
So, I thought, it was very probably Justine who had arranged the first Mrs Alexander’s wardrobe, did this mean that Annabel had little in the way of possessions also? This to me was a very intriguing question. As I walked with Justine along the corridor and down the staircase with the wide curving polished banister I mulled this over in my mind.
On reaching the hall I glanced around, so tired had I been the night before I had taken no heed of my surroundings on entering the castle.
‘The building is fourteenth century,’ Justine told me as I looked at the large tapestries depicting hunting scenes which hung on the whitewashed stone walls. The floorboards beneath my feet were of dark wood and highly polished, candle sconces were dotted around the walls with the odd reindeer head here and there, the antlers curling majestically.
‘The hall has a lot of character,’ I observed as I followed Justine to a corridor which led off the hallway. The door of the room we entered was open and as I stepped inside the first thing I saw was the huge table of light polished wood which could seat at least sixteen people. My heart sank as I saw Kerensa Templeton seated at the head of the table eating her breakfast.
She turned around giving me a cursory glance before returning her attention back to her plate. Thankfully Derrick was there also, he stood up and pushed back his chair when he saw me, quite the gentleman was my thought. I was somewhat relieved to see that Kieran was not there, and then I chided myself that it was how I felt.
At Justine’s direction I lifted each silver lid on the dishes laid out on the huge sideboard, helping myself to breakfast. I sat down opposite Derrick who gave me an encouraging smile whilst Justine poured me coffee.
‘Where is Keiran?’ said Kerensa in a sweet voice to no-one in particular.
‘Where indeed,’ the words escaped my lips unwittingly.
‘She has a voice!’ Kerensa said in a cutting tone.
‘Don’t be rude,’ Justine admonished her. ‘Barbara is the mistress now, so you’d do well to curb your tongue, young woman.’
‘So you’ve lost him have you?’ Kerensa said to me, ignoring Justine’s advice completely. ‘Or maybe you never really found him.’ And she laughed, a light laugh, but it was meant to accompany her unkind words.
‘You are wrong there, Miss Templeton,’ I retorted, my knife and fork poised in my hands, ‘for I can assure you Kieran and I married only yesterday.’
‘Married!’ Kerensa shrieked. ‘It’s just a word, for it will never last.’
‘It might be better for all, Kerensa, if you kept your misjudged opinions to yourself for once,’ cut in Derrick, who had been watching the two of us waiting for the right moment to interrupt. Kerensa’s answer was to push back her chair and flounce out of the room, the skirts of her exquisite pale-blue gown swishing on the patterned carpet, but before leaving she turned back in the doorway and said, ‘You’ll see, I’m right,’ and left us with the sound of her laughter ringing in our ears.
‘Don’t fret about her,’ soothed Derrick, laying a hand across mine on the table as though it were the most natural thing to do, ‘she has always been the same since we were children.’
‘So she lives here and always has?’ I asked.
‘Kerensa is our late father’s ward,’ explained Justine, ‘she is the daughter of a good friend who died when Kerensa was a small child. She is twenty-two now and free to leave having been left a vast inheritance, but she chooses not to go...’
‘Because of Kieran,’ I finished the sentence for her and neither Derrick nor Justine contradicted me.
After breakfast Justine told me to wait in the hall while she instructed Ginny, the head maid, to clear the dining table. I was looking closely at a particularly attractive tapestry when Kieran’s voice startled me.
‘Good morning, Barbara, I trust you slept well,’ he said as if nothing was wrong and he hadn’t totally ignored me since our arrival. I walked across to him.
‘Why did you not join me in our room last night?’ I asked quietly for I failed to understand it.
‘Believe me when I say I have good reason,’ Kieran replied gently, a smile curving his perfect mouth.
‘What has happened to you since we arrived here?’ I asked. ‘You suddenly seem cold and distant, where as in Shrewsbury you were charming and attentive. Do you not find me attractive anymore?’ The thought had suddenly occurred to me.
‘Have no fear, Barbara, I find you endearing. But I cannot share a room with you for the time being at least. And when I do I shall arrive through the adjoining door.’ At his words I recalled seeing the doorway alongside my bed.
‘Then I shall lock it,’ I said with triumph, at the same time loathing the words I spoke for I yearned for Kieran to need me as a wife.
‘You do as you will, Barbara, but I ask that you have patience with me.’ As he spoke he touched my cheek gently and then walked off in the directions of the dining-room.
It wasn’t usual for me to stamp my foot with frustration, but I did only to be caught out by Mrs Burnet as she walked across the hallway closely followed by Justine.
‘Is it the master?’ they both said in unison.
‘It most certainly is,’ was my emphatic reply to the question. ‘Mrs Burnet, I wish the door between my bedroom and my husband’s to be locked forthwith.’
‘Surely not,’ said Justine, aghast to think that I should be barring her brother from my room.
‘I don’t wish to speak of it,’ I said with a strength I didn’t feel. ‘Now please show me my new home as you promised.’
Justine took me to see the morning-room first which was a pleasant room, quite small compared with the dining-room and decorated in pale green, with green brocade curtains at the windows beyond which I could see the snow, the watery sun not having any effect on the white scene. There was a charming writing desk standing beneath the window.
‘You can write your letters here,’ said Justine with some enthusiasm and I could tell that she liked this room.
‘I only have one person to write to,’ I admitted honestly, ‘For I am an orphan and only recently left my position as teacher where I worked my fingers to the bone in the kitchens also. I had very little time for social pursuits.’
‘That’s strange...’ commended Justine.
‘What is?’ I asked looking at her for she had a thoughtful expression on her face.
‘Nothing really, I suppose,’ my sister-in-law began, ‘it’s just that Annabel was an orphan also with no-one, but it’s nothing. Come now, I want to show you the ballroom.’
‘You mean Kieran’s first wife, don’t you?’ I said quietly.
‘Yes, but come now, that’s all in the past.’
Although it was in the past, the fact that my husband had been wed before and not had the decency to tell me very much affected the present, along with the lovely Kerensa. Kieran had all the cards stacked against him as far as I was concerned. But I said no more and followed Kieran’s sister along the corridor until we reached an archway with no door.
We entered the largest room I had ever seen, not even the assembly room at the academy had been so vast. I looked around me, the bottom half of the walls were panelled in a rich coloured wood giving the room a feeling of warmth even though no fire burned in the large stone fireplace, which was set in the wall opposite the four windows, at which hung red curtains with gold braided tassels looping them back from the glass.
The floor was of polished wood and completely clear of furniture, except for beautiful red and gold brocade chairs which stood side by side against the panelling. Large portraits covered the walls above and over the fireplace I caught sight of a painting which drew me to it.
So out of place was it amongst the faces of the Alexander ancestors, I went to stand before it in the centre of the room so as to get the full effect of the beauty of it. The subject matter was a waterfall which flowed down between craggy rocks, falling on the boulders beneath, it was so real I almost believed I stood in front of it in reality.
‘It is rather beautiful, isn’t it,’ observed Justine as she came over to stand beside me. ‘It is a picture of Rowan Falls, from where I believe the castle got its name being only a small way from here. Kieran has been fascinated by the falls ever since he was a child. I’ve no doubt he will take you to see them when the weather improves.’
I couldn’t have known it then, but Rowan Falls would play a great part in my life and in some ways shape my future.
‘It is beautiful as you say,’ I agreed, ‘and I’m sure the reality surpasses the beauty of the painting.’ As I spoke I found it difficult to draw my eyes away but Justine had more pressing things on her mind.
‘This is where we shall hold a ball to celebrate your marriage to my brother,’ she enthused. ‘All the gentry from hereabouts will be invited and we will dance until dawn in your honour.’
‘There is really nothing to celebrate, for now at least,’ I said, dampening my sister-in-law’s spirits.
‘Give it time, Barbara,’ she said placing her arm around my shoulder. ‘I would wager that by the time the snow has disappeared all will be well.’
Sometime later back in my room, darkness was falling and I thought of her words. I knew in my heart that things would one day be well between Kieran and I. Going across to the doorway by my bed, I drew back the curtain and tried the handle of the door.
Thankfully it was shut firmly against my husband.
Mrs Burnet had very obviously heeded my instructions. The only light in the room was from the flames of the fire which leapt up the chimney. I couldn’t locate the tapers to light the candles and while I waited for Megan I walked across to the window, the view outside was akin to a haunted landscape with a silver moon casting its light on the snow.
Everything was still and quiet, how eerie it looked, I mused and shuddered once more at the sight of it. Megan did not appear so I headed back down the stairs to see Justine crossing the hall.
‘Justine,’ I called to her, she looked up a startled smile on her face.
‘Can I help?’ she asked.
‘Have you a work basket with needle and threads please, as I have a sampler to complete, but nothing to work with,’ I told her.
‘Why yes, there is one in the morning room which belonged to my mother,’ she offered. ‘Can you find your own way for I am about to speak to the cook about the menu for dinner tomorrow. I know it should be your job but best you settle in first.’
‘I shall find my way,’ I assured her and as she started to walk on I interrupted her progress. ‘By the by Justine, I wish to see the dressmaker at the earliest opportunity if that can be arranged.’
‘But of course, dear,’ Justine agreed. ‘We shall go as soon as the tracks are clear.’