Above Rubies (Rockland Ranch) (32 page)

             
“You’re right.  Hey, how do you know that?”

             
He shrugged and smiled. “You deal with stuff too well to be a grudge holder.  You didn‘t say you would have dinner with me.”

             
Looking across the car, she asked with a ghost of a smile, “I‘d love to, but do we have to talk about unwed mothers?”

             
He checked his blind spot and changed lanes.  “No, but you might have to explain to me more about how God still loves wild rockers.”

             
She held his hand with both of hers and said, “Nick, I’d be only too happy to tell you anything I’ve learned in the last year about God.  He’s been the greatest gift I could ever have from the Rocklands, but you know who could explain about that better than me?  God.  You should ask Him.”

             
                                          ****

             
Alone in his darkened living room that night, listening to music, he almost got up the nerve to do it.

             
                                          ****             

             
When Nick showed up the next morning to play, he didn’t look like he’d slept all that well.  He met Kit’s eyes when he came to walk her through the day’s music and she wasn’t sure what she saw there.  At least he hadn’t sent her packing.  They played through the morning and he was quiet during the lunch they ordered in.  They never even tried to play
Coming Home
and by the time they left for dinner, Kit had no clue what to think.

             
He picked her up in the Maserati again, but this time they got takeout at a drive through and took it back to the beach.  They walked back out to the boulders they'd sat on the last time and began to eat, side by side.  Finally, she said, "Nick, even if you tell me to go to China, I need you to say something.  What's in your head?  What's going on?"

             
He finished his bite and shrugged. "I have no idea.  How's that for honest?"

             
Leaning against his shoulder, she answered, "It's good for honest, bad for Kit understanding."

             
"What would you say if I told you I thought I was falling in love with you?"  He turned to her and took off his sunglasses, and she saw an emotion she didn't know how to deal with. 

             
She searched his eyes at length and said, "Nick, I know I'm young and unsophisticated, but don't tease me.  You've become my friend and I'm trusting you."  She looked down at her sandwich, and then wrapped it up and put it back in the bag.  Talk of love ruined her appetite.

             
With a sigh he put his sandwich away too and ran a frustrated hand through his hair.  "Baby, I wish I was teasing, 'cause I'm way out of my comfort zone here."  She just looked at him, more confused than ever.  Finally, she hopped off the rock and took his hand to pull him to his feet beside her. 

             
They walked down the beach in silence for several minutes and then she asked, "Why would my telling you about my daughter make you think you were falling in love?  Isn't that backwards?"

             
"Last night has nothing to do with my feelings, except that I'm sorry for what you've been through.  It makes me wonder if she's as beautiful as you.  And how in the world I'll figure out how to hold a baby, but this isn't about your daughter.  I don't even know what this is about.  I don't think I've ever experienced this before."

             
She stopped and looked at him again, trying to figure out if he really would tease her about this.  She honestly didn't think this was possible, but he looked so serious.  As she studied him, he shook his head and said, "Geez, girl.  I'm bearing my soul to you and you don't even believe me."

             
"Nick, you have five million women after you and I'm just Kit.  How do you expect me to believe you?  How could this be possible?"

             
They started walking again and he mumbled under his breath, "Just Kit."  He turned to her. "Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds to me?  You're the most fascinating human being I've ever come in contact with, not to mention that you're exquisitely beautiful, unbelievably smart and completely refreshing!  Just Kit."  He turned back away and went to the edge of the water to skip rocks, almost angrily.

             
Walking up to him again, she gently touched him on the arm.  When he looked down at her, she said, "I'm sorry."

             
He smiled at her and wrapped her in a hug again.  "What are you sorry for this time, Just Kit?"

             
"For not taking you seriously, and for . . . "  She was confused for a minute.  "I'm not sure what else for.  For screwing up somehow."

             
He laughed at her and turned with her to continue on down the beach.  "Is that what you call this love thing?  Screwing up?"

             
She turned her face up to his.  "I guess so, because I have to be honest with you, Nick.  I like you, I respect you, and I think you're adorable, but I don't think I'm in love with you.  I'm sorry."

             
He put his arm around her shoulders and turned to walk back down the beach toward the car.  "I know, Kit.  And it's okay.  I'll keep trying, and if it never works, then at least I'll have had the chance to have loved a truly good woman."

             
Back at the door to her hotel room, he took her in his arms for a moment, then kissed her on the forehead, and said, "See you in the morning."

             
                                          ****

             
The next day went somewhat better.  He still looked at her with those deep brown inscrutable eyes that she didn't know how to deal with, but she knew they were friends no matter what.  And when they played
Coming Home
, she played and sang with him wholeheartedly, in spite of the fact that she wished they could go back in time. 

             
When he asked if he could see her and Joey to the airport that evening, she accepted, even though this time she was sure it wasn't wise.  She just had no idea what else to do.  Kit insisted he let them out at the curb.  She didn't think she could bear to face those eyes in front of a bunch of his fans.  He helped them get their bags checked and then hugged her like he never wanted to let go, and kissed her on the forehead again.  Somehow he must have known she would be too uncomfortable if he really tried to kiss her and she was incredibly grateful for that.

             
As she went to go, he reached out to pull her back.  She turned to him and he looked deep into her eyes and asked, "Kit, would you think about something while you're home?  Would you think about coming back to LA forever?"  Her eyes flew to his in a panic, but what she saw there was real.  She knew he was absolutely serious. 

             
She had no idea what to do, but she knew his question deserved an honest response.  "I'll think about it."  She gave him one last long hug and he got back into his beautiful car and drove away.

             
Once he was gone and they walked inside, Joey looked at her long and hard, but she never said anything. Kit was glad.  She had no clue how to handle any of this, let alone talk about it with someone else.  All the way home she felt guilty, but she could never pin down exactly what for.  By the time she walked into the house at eleven thirty to find Rossen waiting up for them, she was exhausted.

Chapter 17

             
When Rossen saw them come in, he knew right away that Kit was troubled about something.  He stood up from the couch with Mimi sleeping on his shoulder and accepted hugs from both of them.  Kit hugged him first, leaning in to kiss Mimi gently on the cheek and then asked him if she could take her to bed with her.  He handed her over and watched her walk away.  Once she was gone, Joey plopped down on the couch with a sigh and he sat back down next to her.  "What's going on?  Why does she look so hammered?"             

             
Joey laughed. "Rossen, even hammered that girl looks better than ninety nine point nine percent of the women in this world, and you know it.  She's just tired.  She's dancing about three times faster than most women, trying to keep my bone headed brother happy.  Cut her some slack.  Plus, this time I think she's struggling to balance a lovesick rock star into the mix and he's depressed the heck out of her."

             
Rossen turned on the couch to look directly at her.  "Whoa, whoa, whoa.  Say that again.  What's going on?"

             
Joey yawned.  "I'm not sure, because you know how Kit is.  She keeps her troubles to herself. But if I had to make a guess, I'd say that Nick has fallen hard and fast for her and she's trying to figure out how to deal with it."

             
Rossen leaned back against the couch and put his head back to look at the ceiling.  "What else were you saying?  What's she doing to try and keep Treyne happy?"

             
Joey sat up to look at him like he was crazy.  "What are you talking about?"

             
“You just said she was dancing trying to keep your boneheaded brother happy.  What is it Treyne's unhappy about?"

             
Joey gave an exasperated sigh and stood up.  "Rossen, I swear for an intelligent man, you're a dork sometimes!"  She headed for her room saying over her shoulder as she left, "You're the boneheaded brother, not Treyne.  He loves her no matter what she chooses to do.  You're the one she has to try so hard to please."

             
He sat on the couch alone, utterly stunned.  He had no idea what Joey was talking about.  He sat and tried to figure it out, finally gave up and went to bed.  He'd ask his mom what was going on tomorrow.

             
                                          ****

             
Kit made it through church without falling asleep and felt like she'd won a sizeable battle.  After dinner she was back out on the deck again with the baby in the lounge chair.  The leaves had started to change on all the hillsides around and even though the air was brisk, the scenery was incredible.  She had Mimi wrapped snuggly in a blanket and was enjoying the feel of her little body cuddled close when Rossen came out to pull up a chair beside them.  His hair was windblown and he was wearing a USU sweatshirt from college and a well faded pair of jeans that fit his body to perfection and she watched him come over and sit down with pleasure.  He was a gorgeous man.  Mimi reached for him saying, “Dah,” and he picked her up. 

             
He watched Kit watching him and she didn't even try to hide it, as he came and sat down and asked, "So, how was LA?" 

             
She studied his eyes, wondering what she was hearing in his voice as she answered, "Good.  Hectic, but fun.  California is like a whole different planet sometimes."

             
"What do you mean?"

             
She shrugged.  "I don't know how to explain it exactly.  It's like life speeds up and becomes more superficial all at the same time.  It's really fun to go for a couple of days, but I think living there would be exhausting."

             
"You've looked tired when you've come home these two times.  Are you doing okay?"

             
"Actually, this time it was more my school stuff from before I left, than California.  And then some of the people we work with there can be a little hard to figure out.  But it's fun.  Honestly, we took a Maserati through the drive-through at McDonalds yesterday.  It was great!"  Her eyes sparkled.  "I mean, who gets to do that?  Nick is talking about doing a benefit concert and I love being a part of a band, but it's heavenly to come home." 

             
He was watching her intently and asked, "What's going on at school that's so hectic?"

             
Feeling slightly guilty that she had to work to shrug, she said, "I've just been trying to get everything done so I could go to LA and then come home here without falling hopelessly behind.  Being a studio musician in another state, a full-time student, and still trying to be even a part-time mom is a stretch sometimes, but I think eventually I'll get a handle on it." 

She wasn't mentioning coming home permanently in December because there was no point in arguing about it until she had to.  She was still hoping all the extra credits from her CLEP tests and the internships would smooth him over
somewhat.  He was looking at her like he was skeptical and she wanted to squirm.  Finally she decided she was too tired to feel guilty for trying to eventually please him and she closed her eyes.  She still hadn't asked him how old she had to be, to be old enough to settle down.