Chapter Eleven
“Oh my God! I have to get to Unique. I have to get to my baby!” Lorain became frantic as she removed herself from Nicholas's embrace and darted for the door to exit the hospital lounge.
“Wait a minute.” Nicholas stood and caught up with her before she could leave. “I really don't think it's a good idea that you drive in this condition, Lorain. I don't want you to end up back here in the ER as a patient.”
“I have to go. I have to see about Unique.”
“And I understand that, but you're a mess right now. Just wait here a little while longer. I'm sure Unique is probably even on her way here to the hospital to see ... to . . .” Not wanting to say the wrong thing, Nicholas just said nothing at all. There'd been many a-time that family members insisted on saying final good-byes to their loved ones after they'd passed in the hospital. Then there were the families who insisted on having their last memories of their loved ones of when they were alive. He didn't know which Unique would choose, but he knew as a mother, she'd still come up to the hospital to get details.
The thought never even crossed Lorain's mind that nine times out of ten Unique was probably on her way to the hospital. She wondered if Unique even knew that her sons had passed; that they couldn't be saved by the doctors and nurses. Lorain thought for a quick second of the emotions her daughter must be going through right now if she, in fact, did know the boys were dead. Lorain, herself, nearly collapsed just thinking about it. How they died she hadn't even thought to ask. She had to get over the sheer shock of them being dead first.
“Oh, God!” Hunched over as if she had a belly ache, Lorain began to weep.
“See, that's it. I'm sorry, honey, but I can't let you leave from here like this.” Nicholas led Lorain back over to the couch and sat her down. “Just calm down and let's call Unique, okay?”
Lorain nodded.
“Where's your cell phone?” By the time he asked, Nicholas was already digging in Lorain's purse for the phone. A few seconds later he pulled it out. “Here it is.”
With a trembling hand, Lorain accepted the phone. She didn't dial or anything; just looked down at the phone. Shaking her head and sniffing she said, “I ... I don't even know what to say to her.” She looked up at Nicholas. “What do I say to her, Nick? What do I say?”
Nicholas was at a loss for words. Yes, he'd had to tell many families that their loved ones had passed on to glory. After that, though, there had always been someone else there to comfort them. There had always been someone else there who just knew what to say. He'd never had to be that person, not until now anyway.
Although Nicholas wasn't a practicing Christian, he knew God was real. He knew of all God's miracles and power. He'd witnessed them and given God credit for them every day he worked with patients. As far as he was concerned, to some degree, he was more of a believer than some Christians he knew. That was the reason why even though every member of his immediate family was a practicing Christian and member of a church, he just couldn't follow suit. He felt his place to worship God was right there at the hospital. That's where he felt his strongest connection to God and saw Him at work in lives every day; not just Sunday.
He'd seen the reactions on so-called Christians' faces when he'd told a story of how a person who'd been pronounced dead, no vital signs whatsoever, was brought back to life simply because God breathed on them. He'd seen their faces when he'd told stories of how a person who had been diagnosed with HIV, had been sick from it, eating pills daily just to survive the next day, had come in, and all of a sudden, tested negative for the deadly disease. Cancers not simply gone in remission, but cured ... gone forever; all this simply because God chose to do it.
What really baffled Nicholas were the ones who had prayed at their loved one's bedside endlessly for days at a time. They'd prayed and fasted, fasted and prayed. Then when God did what they'd been asking Him to do, they couldn't really believe He'd done it. He could see the question marks on their faces. “Did God
really
do that?” Sometimes they'd give him as the doctor more honor, glory, praises, hugs, kisses, and flowers than they would the God they claimed to serve.
No. Nicholas could not be a part of that. Lately, though, he had found himself attending church more often than he had in the past. That was mostly because of Lorain though. He'd watched her, and she wasn't like some of the other Christians he'd encountered. That's why, oddly enough, he'd been attending New Day versus the church his own family had been members of for years; the church he used to drop in on every now and then. It wasn't that there weren't these types of Christians at New Day just like at his family's church. There were just less of those types. The reason being because New Day was smaller than his family's church. In addition to that, Nicholas was just learning, after all these years, to close his eyes to man and open his heart to Jesus. But right now, his heart seemed to be aching with pain for the woman he loved so dearly. How could he sit there and tell her what to say to Unique, when he barely knew what to say to her? It was only by the direction of the Holy Spirit that he'd managed thus far.
“Baby, just tell her that you love her.” The words fell out of Nicholas's mouth like they'd been sitting on his tongue all along. “Tell her that you are here for her. Tell her that God is going to make everything okay.” Nicholas grabbed Lorain by the shoulders tenderly and looked into her eyes. “You do believe that, right? You do believe that God has this?”
Lorain nodded. “I do, Nicholas. I do.” It was at that moment that a wind of strength trickled through Lorain's body. Until just that moment when Nicholas reminded her, she really had forgotten that God would make this thing okay. That God would take care of Unique as well as herself. “Yes, God is going to make everything okay. That's exactly what I'm going to tell her.” Lorain's shoulders lifted. Her head lifted. It was as if she was a transformer about to go into action.
Nicholas smiled. “That's it. That's right. That's my girl ... That's my strong woman of God.”
Lorain smiled, something she thought she would never do for a long time. “Yes ... a strong woman in the Lord. I'm going to use that strength to get through this. I'm going to use the strength of Christ Jesus to help Unique get through this. Yes, that's exactly what I'm going to do.” Lorain dialed Unique's cell phone and hit the button for the call to go through. She looked over at Nicholas while the phone rang.
Nicholas's smile broadened as he took her hand. He was so thankful that God had showed up and orchestrated his communication with Lorain. He'd kept his eyes off of the situation and on Jesus. Even now his eyes were still on Jesus as Lorain made that call to Unique. His eyes were so much so on Jesus that even though Lorain's hand rested in his, not once did he notice she was wearing the ring.
Chapter Twelve
Unique lost count a long time ago of how many times she'd been up in the club doing the electric slide, the Detroit Hustle and even the booty call ... sometimes literally doing a booty call. She never thought, though, in her wildest dreams she'd ever be in a situation in which she would be doing the perp walk. Yet, here she was dressed in jailhouse garb, handcuffed, being escorted out of the county jail to a van that would take her to her next destination. The past twelve hours had been unbelievable. Everything was happening so fastâjust like in a movie. Only this was real time.
She wanted to cry, but this moment was too surreal for her to cry. This wasn't happening. It wasn't real. It was all in her head. It was a test from God to see if she could endure. It was a nightmare. It was all of those things, is what Unique hoped. It was anything but real. She could think about the situation any way she wanted to, but it was real all right; as real as it gets. And it was happening in real time as she trailed last in line behind five other women dressed and cuffed just like her.
Unique wanted to ask where she was going and why. Why was she being transported to another location so soon? What was so special about her circumstances where they felt she couldn't stay at county in general population? She was too stunned about the entire situation though. She couldn't even put her words together in order to ask the question, but it would soon be answeredâjust how
special
her circumstances were.
As all the women in line before her exited the building, Unique followed suit.
“You,” a guard's voice shot at Unique. “You wait right here.”
As if on cue, another guard walked over carrying some type of vest in his arms. While he prepared to put the vest on Unique, another guard removed the cuffs from her wrists so that she could put her arms through the openings in the vest.
“What's this? What's going on?” Unique was visually confused as the jacket was put on her and tightened. “I said what's going on?” Unique repeated after none of the guards had replied to her first query.
“It's a bulletproof vest.” The guard who had taken her handcuffs off now locked them tightly back around her wrists.
“Ouch.” Unique wondered if the guard was mad at her for asking a simple question and was trying to punish her by stopping her blood flow with the handcuffs. “Why ... Why are you putting a bulletproof vest on me?” Worry was written on Unique's face.
The guard laughed. “Do you know how many people would love to get their hands on a mother who leaves her kids locked up in a car in the hot sun to die while she goes in a drug house to get some crack?” He laughed again. “A bulletproof vest; my friend, you need the National Guard.” He looked at Unique and shook his head. “There's already been a bomb threat made. Why you think we getting you outta here quick fast and in a hurry?” He shook his head at Unique's ignorance. “Come on, let's go.”
As if her feet were cemented to the ground, Unique couldn't move. Even when the guard pulled at her, her feet stayed planted where they stood.
“Did you hear me? I said, let's go.” This time the guard, along with another guard, snatched her up and practically pulled her out of the building.
As a girl in the projects, Unique had lay across her dirty mattress on the floor many a time just imagining the day she'd walk out of a restaurant or something and see cameras flashing. She'd be donning a gown by one of the world's top fashion designers. She'd have bodyguards protecting her from the public. Everyone would be trying to get a picture of her to sell to newspapers and magazines. People would be calling out questions to her, and she'd reply with a pearly white grin and perfect teeth. From there she'd be ushered into a waiting limo with a driver who would take her anywhere in the world that she wanted to go.
What she never imagined is that she'd be escorted by prison guards and not bodyguards. That she'd be escorted from one jail to the next, not wearing an expensive designer gown, but instead, prison clothes and a bulletproof vest. She never imagined that all the cameras flashing would be owned by criminal news reporters and not paparazzi. It was late. The sun was going down, so the reporters would miss getting Unique's story on the five o'clock news, but she was sure come eleven o'clock, her face would be plastered on every channel.
Instead of questions like, “Ms. Gray, who are you wearing, what is your next project, and who are you dating?” Unique heard questions like, “Ms. Gray, did you leave your sons in the car in a hundred-degree weather while you went into a crack house to get high off drugs? Ms. Gray, is it true you are dating one of the cities most notorious drug lords? Ms. Gray, is it true you're a female hustler?”
Unique thought she was going to hyperventilate at the scene taking place around her. She felt as if she were outside of herself. It was as if she were nothing more than a shell already on the van along with the other prisoners, watching herself. A shell just waiting for her body to join her.
She never said a word as she made her way to the van. The people yelling out questions to her were all just blurry faces as Unique fought back tears of fear.
Do not walk in fear. God will work this out,
she kept telling herself over and over again.
Do not walk in fear.
Well, she was no longer walking in fear. Now positioned on a seat at the front of the van, she was sitting in fear. The ride to wherever it was that Unique was going started off on the smooth I-71 Interstate, but after about forty minutes, it became bumpy. Unique hadn't even realized they were no longer on the highway. They were now riding through some dirt roads with no signs of community living within miles.
After a few moments, the van pulled up in front of a very tall iron gate. A female guard exited a little booth and approached the driver's window. A man on the van handed the guard a piece of paper or a card or something; Unique couldn't quite make it out. The guard read over it, then nodded as she handed it back to the driver. Next, she walked around and opened the van doors. She gazed over the occupants as her lips moved, but no words came out. Unique surmised she was taking count. After doing so, she nodded at the other guard who had ridden along for the entire ride in the van. After the guard exited the van and walked across the front of the van and back over to her post, the gate opened and the van moved through it.
Unique's stomach began preparing for the Olympics by doing all sorts of crazy backflips and somersaults. She pressed her tongue against the roof of her mouth and put her cuffed hands over her mouth. She thought she might puke any minute.
Jesus,
she repeated over and over in her head.
Jesus
.
When the van finally came to a stop, the guard stood up and opened the van doors. Several guards on the prison grounds, armed with guns, surrounded the van.
“All right, ladies,” the guard started. He then looked over at a big, butchy-looking broad. “... and gentleman.” He let out a chuckle. “You're home sweet home. Stand up and follow the instructions of your new mothers and fathers.”
Everyone followed instructions, everyone, that is, except for Unique. She couldn't. If she moved she was liable to barf.
“Hey, that includes you,” the guard snapped at Unique. “And let's get something straight. See those men and women out there with those nice, pretty guns?” He didn't wait for Unique to respond. “They don't really tell you things twice, if you know what I mean.”
Unique looked out of the van at the gun-toting guards.
“So get your black tail up and get the heck off of my van.” The guard looked up. “That goes for all of you convicts; get to moving.”
Unique stood, and with a queasy stomach and queasy legs to match, she became the designated line leader, leading the other women from the van. Once all the women were off the van, a guard began to call out further instructions about where they were to go, different rules, regulations, etc... .
After awhile, for Unique, the words began to sound scrambled and eventually faded. By the time things became clear, she was inside a building and the guard was still howling off instructions.
“So come on, you're first.” The guard was looking directly at Unique. Unique felt a tug on her arm, and then realized that the guard had been talking to her. “Hurry up, hold your hands out before I make you try to undress with the cuffs on.” Initially, there had been a male officer guiding the inmates into the building. Somehow it was now a female officer doing all the instructing. Where had Unique's mind gone?
Unique held her hands out, and the guard removed the cuffs.
“Now go in there and take it off.” The guard nodded to the open doorway behind her.
Unique slowly walked through the entryway and stood still.
“Like I said, through the door and to your right,” the guard shouted to Unique once she saw that she was idle.
Unique looked to the right before she stepped to the right. There were several female guards lined up, each of their hands covered in rubber gloves.
At first, Unique didn't know if they were doctors or what, but then reality set in, and she realized exactly what was about to go down.
“Come on over here, sweetness, and let's see what you've gotâor hopefully what you don't got,” a female guard joked, holding her gloved hands up. “Get over here and take off every thing.”
“Everything?” Unique questioned.
“You heard me, honey. This ain't your annual gynecology exam where you can take everything off but your socks. Those need to go too.”
This nightmare of a dream just kept getting worse for Unique as she walked over and stood in front of the guard. She slowly removed her clothing.
“Now bend over,” the guard instructed.
Humiliated, Unique had stripped off her clothes. As if standing there without any clothes on wasn't bad enough, the guard began poking, prodding, and lifting parts of Unique's body that made her sick to her stomach; so sick that this time, the puke she'd been holding back for the past hour or so spilled from her mouth and down the front of her body.
“Jesus!” Thank goodness the guard had been standing behind her. “Darsey!” the guard called out, then the female guard who had removed Unique's handcuffs appeared in the doorway. “Get somebody to clean this crap up.”
The guard that had been summoned looked at Unique in disgust, shook her head, then exited the room.
“I'm ... I'm sorry,” Unique apologized.
“Yeah, you're sorry, you and every other piece of poop criminal in this place,” the guard replied. “Head on back to showers and clean yourself up.”
Unique looked around through another opening where she saw showers. “Through there?” she questioned.
“You got a problem listening or something?” The guard stood erect and poked her chest out as if she was calling Unique out. “Didn't you hear the instructions Officer Darsey gave you out there?”
Without replying, Unique just turned and headed through the doorway and straight to the showers.
“Geez, you stink,” she heard a voice say, then turned to see an armed officer standing in the front left corner of the room. “You need to hurry up for real and get in that shower.” Her nose was turned up.
Unique took a couple more steps toward the shower, then she paused and looked over at the correctional officer. “Is there any soap?”
“Sure, there is.” Unique was relieved until the officer added, “But not for baby killers. Now get in that shower before I change my mind and leave you with your dinner all over you so that the rats can feast on you.”
Baby killer.
Those words had stung Unique. Obviously everyone was expecting and knew what the so-called baby killer looked like.
Fear removed itself from Unique and allowed for rage to take its place. Hearing that officer refer to her as a baby killer made her want to go back to the hood of things like when she lived in the projects. She had to remind herself that she now lived in the Kingdom though. So with that she just walked on over to the shower, turned it on, and prayed that the water would wash away her anger and would wash away any remnants of fear.
During that shower was when it really set in Unique's mind that perhaps that guard was right. Maybe she was nothing more than a baby killer. Her boys were dead. Who else could have killed them? Who else left them in that car to die in that heat? No, she hadn't done it on purpose, but she had done it nonetheless.
“I'm a killer,” Unique proclaimed softly to herself. “I've committed the ultimate sin.” It was a sin that she knew that the running shower water could not wash away. Nope, only the blood of Jesus could do that. But Unique felt what had happened was so heinous that she doubted whether even Jesus' blood could wash that one away. She deserved to be where she was. She deserved to spend the rest of her life in that place. And that's exactly what she planned on telling the judge when she had her day in court. But hopefully, someone would stop her before it got to that point; otherwise, Unique would be digging her own grave.