Back To You (8 page)

“I’m John, by the
way,” he said, extending his hand for me to shake.

I cautiously
placed my hand in his and told him my name. I noticed a twinge of wickedness in
his eyes that I hadn’t seen earlier. I must have been too drunk and wrapped up
in the music to really get a good look at him when we were dancing. Unease
settled in my belly when he didn’t release my hand. I shifted to put my beer
down on a nearby table, my eyes locked on his. He sneered back at me.

“Come dance with
me again,” he demanded in a low voice. I could tell that he thought he was
being suave, but to me he looked like a predator.

“I’m tired, I
think I’ll pass. Thanks for earlier, though.” I instinctively wanted to placate
him, keeping my voice steady and impassive so as not to fuel the fire.

“Maybe it’s time
to put you to bed,” he drawled, using his other hand to pull me close against
him. He used his size advantage to move me against the sidewall of the house,
and at that angle I knew that I was out of sight from everyone on the patio. I
squirmed futilely in his embrace, tilting my head back to where I had seen
Olivia and Matt. They were gone.

“Or,” John leaned
down to whisper in my ear, his hot breath wreaking of stale beer, “we can just
go to my car.”

We stood in the
shadows just outside of the glow of the porch light. If anyone saw us, they
would probably just think we were hooking up and leave us alone. I turned my
head as he nipped on my ear, and he took the opportunity to crush his mouth to
mine. He fisted one of his hands in my hair while keeping me securely locked to
his chest with the other. I felt the wall against my back and started to panic.
I pulled my lips away, trying to cry out. He took that as an invitation to
stick his tongue in my open mouth, deepening the forceful kiss.

My mind
frantically raced for a way to get him off. I was no match for him in physical
strength. I slowly pulled back one of my legs, then slammed my knee forward as
hard as I could. With his height, the blow only landed mid-thigh, so it didn’t
have the desired effect of smashing his balls, but he released me nonetheless.

“I have a
boyfriend. Get the fuck away from me,” I said, wiping my mouth with the back of
my forearm.

“Really?” He
glanced around, seemingly checking to see if anyone was paying attention. He
kept his voice low and pointed in the direction of the house. “Does your
boyfriend know about you grinding your ass all over me a few minutes ago?”

I flinched as if
he’d slapped me. I knew I was drunk, but I was pretty sure that I hadn’t been inappropriate
with him. Before I could defend myself further, Olivia appeared beside me. She
stared wide-eyed at John, then at me. Taking me by the arm, Olivia started to
pull me away when John glowered at her.

“Back off, bitch,
this is a private conversation,” he growled, apparently past the point of
caring if anyone was listening.

He made a grab for
me again, but his arm was suddenly twisted unnaturally behind his back. Spencer
stood behind him, one hand pinning John’s arm to his back at an awkward angle
and the other pushing his elbow toward the sky. It looked like a practiced
move; a perfectly executed restraint – complete with what looked like a
considerable amount of pain. Matt appeared out of nowhere and stood
protectively in front of me. I had to crane my neck to see around him.

“Get the fuck off
of me,” John spat at Spencer. I smirked at the familiar wording. A crowd
started to gather around us. People were slowly approaching the side yard from
the porch, squinting into the darkness.

Spencer put his
mouth right next to John’s ear and spoke in a low growl. “I will. But not
before you understand something. If you ever fucking touch her, or look at her,
again, I will kill you.”

My eyes grew wide
as I watched Spencer hold the creep in a death grip. I’d never seen him that
angry in all the years I’d known him. The look in his eye was murderous. His
arms flexed as he tightened his grip on John. He was breathing steadily, as if
the adrenaline coursing through him was muted by his new ability to control it.
I was glad that only Olivia, Matt, and I had been close enough to overhear what
he had said to John, just in case. He may have only learned the basics in boot
camp, but he seemed trained enough to take out this jerk without blinking.

I put a hand on
Matt’s shoulder and moved slowly around him, not sparing a glance at John as I
spoke to my friend. “Spence.”

His gaze shifted
to me briefly, then immediately away. He tightened his grip on John’s arm and
pushed his elbow further upward, causing another bout of pain to shoot across
the guy’s face. “Do you understand?”

John nodded
slightly, his eyes still defiant as his mouth pressed into a hard line to mask
his pain. He gasped when Spencer released him with a shove, and didn’t look
back as he skulked into the house.

“Well,” Jesse
said, scratching his head. He glanced around at his guests still standing in a
loose circle around us. He had apparently seen most of what happened, and was
trying to lighten the mood. “That was entertaining.”

A few people in
the crowd chuckled and turned away, figuring that there was nothing left to
see. Spencer breathed out through his nose and rolled his shoulders. He took
the beer that Jesse offered him and chugged the contents, handing the empty cup
back to the quarterback with a nod of thanks.

“Great party, man.
We’re
gonna
take off.” Spencer extended his hand to
Jesse.

With a laugh,
Jesse shook Spencer’s hand and wished us all a good night. He turned to me,
concern showing on his face. “You okay?”

“I’m fine, thank
you. Sorry for the commotion.”

Jesse winked at
me. “Please. It’d be a pretty shitty party if no one tried to beat the hell out
of someone.”

Spencer appeared
beside me and lightly touched my lower back. I gave Jesse one last hug and
turned to follow my friends around the side of the house. I knew Spencer was
leading us this way so that we didn’t have to pass through the living room to
get to the street. I was grateful, since I didn’t know if John would be lurking
inside, ready to pick a fight.

“Thank you,” I
said quietly as we walked, bumping Spencer’s shoulder with mine.

He slung his arm
around me. “Anytime. That guy is such a dick.”

“You know him?”
Olivia asked from behind us.

“Yeah, he goes to
Northern. I’ve run into him at parties and shit before. I’m glad Matt came and
got me when he did.”

I turned to Matt,
handing him the keys to my car. “You went to get him?”

“Yeah,” Matt
answered. “I saw that dude come outside and after the way he was
creepin
’ on you earlier I figured I should grab Hawk just
in case something went down.”

When we reached
the car, Spencer opened the door and allowed me to slide into the backseat,
then followed.

“Where were you,
anyway?” I asked him, instantly regretting the question. I was pretty sure I
knew where he was.

“I was with
Kelly,” he responded quietly.

“One of the girls
in the driveway? Figures. That dress didn’t look like it was supposed to stay
on long.”

Spencer swallowed
and looked away.

Matt got into the
driver’s seat and started the engine. “It’s good that it didn’t come to a
fight, since we can’t really fight at parties anymore, bro.”

“What do you
mean?” I asked, looking at Spencer.

He remained quiet,
so Matt answered for him. “It’s not that we can’t, it’s just that it could get
a lot more complicated now. They taught us about deadly force in boot camp, so
if we get in a fight and things get crazy, we could be charged with aggravated
assault because of our training.”

I saw Spencer’s
fist clench at his side. He looked really tense, and I battled with myself over
whether to reach out and touch him. I wanted to comfort him for some reason,
even though I was still shaken by what happened with John.

“Anyway,” Matt
continued, “I told Olivia to check downstairs for Hawk while I looked upstairs,
then to meet me outside. I should have gone over there myself. I just figured
you’d be fine with the crowd of people outside. How bad did it get?”

I shrugged. “It
happened pretty fast. He just kissed me, but I kneed him in the thigh and he
let me go.”

Spencer stiffened
in his seat next to me. “He
kissed
you?”

I shrugged again,
not sure what to say. His eyes were cold and hard as he looked into mine. He
reached for my hand across the seat and squeezed it briefly before letting it
go. I could see his jaw clench, like he was trying to hold something back.

Before I could ask
him what he was thinking, Olivia turned to look at us from the passenger seat.
“I guess I walked up right after that. I’m sorry, Ellie. What an asshole.”

“It’s okay,
Olivia, thanks.”

Matt broke the
silence only once after that, to ask me where he was supposed to drop us off.
It was decided ahead of time for Matt to take my car overnight and we would all
meet up for breakfast in the morning for him to give it back. I gave the
directions to Spencer’s, knowing that I couldn’t go home to my parent’s house
after being out drinking. They knew my relationship with Spencer was platonic,
so they never messed with me about spending the night at his place.

Truthfully, my
adrenaline from the incident at the party had pretty much sobered me up. I
could probably go home without an issue at this point. I glanced at Spencer. He
was staring out the window, his face still a mask of hard lines and
concentration. I wished he would snap out of it. I wasn’t used to him being so
pensive. I tried to catch his eye to get a glimpse into what was going on with
him, but he wouldn’t look my way.

Chapter Eight

Spencer

I hopped out of
the car after thanking Mills and Olivia for driving. I turned to give Ellie a
hand, not sure if she was still drunk. The fact that she had gotten that drunk in
the first place annoyed me since she obviously didn’t know better than to dance
with that moron. I scowled as I thought about what I knew of John. This wasn’t
the first time he had put moves on a girl that wasn’t interested, and I’d seen
multiple fights between John and protective boyfriends. I never figured that I
would have to be in that situation. Not that I was Ellie’s boyfriend or
anything.

I was overwhelmed
with relief that things had gone so smoothly. As a Marine on Boot Leave, the
consequences of getting into a fight could end my career before it even began.
I had always known that I wanted to be a lifer and move up in the ranks as
quickly as possible. I wanted to do even better than my dad did. Getting busted
for underage drinking and brawls would be a black mark on my record that I
didn’t need. It may be a time of war, but they were still pretty stingy with
promotions due to government cutbacks. The best of the best moved forward,
while the rest got out after their four years without much progression in terms
of rank.

The car pulled
away with a final wave from my friends, leaving Ellie and me standing on the
curb in silence. She stared at me expectantly, but I had no idea what she
wanted me to say, so we started up the driveway. I looked up at the darkened
windows of the house. There were no lights on that I could see, so I jogged up
to look through the small windows that lined the top of the garage door. My
dad’s car was gone.

“Not home?” Ellie
asked, guessing that I had seen an empty garage.

“He’s probably not
coming home. It’s already after three in the morning,” I replied, taking the
steps to the porch two at a time. I took a seat on the swing and sighed. My
father had come to my graduation the previous day, but the pride that I had seen
on the old man’s face had been replaced by the usual tension as soon as we’d
pulled away from the base. I’d barely seen him since then.

“He’s such an
ass,” Ellie commented, taking a seat next to me on the swing.

“Don’t,” I said,
holding up a hand. The more I thought about it, the more irritated I was with
her for putting herself in that situation earlier in the night. “I’m really not
in the mood.”

“Jesus, Spence.”
Ellie rolled her eyes at my attitude. “I’m not the one you’re mad at.”

I stood abruptly,
causing the swing to jolt back toward the wall behind it. “Actually, you are
the one I’m mad at.”

I paced in a small
line in front of the swing, collecting myself. I didn’t get upset with her very
often, if ever, and I wasn’t sure what to do with it. I could feel her watching
me, but she didn’t say anything. That pissed me off even more. Did it mean that
she knew why I was annoyed with her, and understood? Or did it mean that she
thought I was being ridiculous?

“Spencer,” Ellie
started, her tone border-lining condescension, “you’re not making any sense.
Sit down and talk to me.”

I shook my head.
Her tone of voice confirmed that she thought I was being unreasonable, and that
did it. I turned on her, pointing my finger at her to punctuate my words. “No,
you know what, this is bullshit. You shouldn’t have put yourself in that
position tonight. You have a boyfriend. You have no business getting wasted and
dirty dancing with some random dude. I shouldn’t have to risk getting into a
fuck-load of trouble to stand up for you.”

Ellie gaped at me,
speechless.

“I’m serious. I
shouldn’t have to babysit you,” I continued. “You should make sure that your
next boyfriend lives in the same city as you because in a few days I’ll be gone
and I don’t want to have to worry about this happening again.”

“Okay, hold on,”
Ellie stood and faced me, pointing her finger at me this time. “I was drinking
just as much as you were, until you stopped so you could go fuck that Kelly
girl in a spare room. I was
not
dirty
dancing with him. I may have been drunk, but I still know where the line is. As
far as you being my babysitter, that’s complete bullshit. I don’t need you to
babysit me, I was doing fine.”

I laughed harshly.
“You were doing fine? Does that mean you
let
him kiss you?” When Ellie glared murderously at me for suggesting it, I
raised my hands to show that she proved my point. “Exactly.”

“I got him off of
me, didn’t I?”

“Yeah.” I nodded,
my eyes boring into hers. “You did. And I’m proud of you for that. But when I
got there, he was just about to reach for you again. How long do you think you
would have lasted against him? He had you pushed up against a wall, out of
sight from everyone else.”

Ellie jutted her
chin forward. “I would have been fine.”

“Oh yeah?” In a
quick move, I grabbed her by the tops of her arms and pinned her against the
wall of the house. She squirmed in my grasp. She tried to bring her knee up to
use against me like she had with John, but I aligned my body to hers so that
she wouldn’t be able to move. I watched her try other ways to get out of my
grasp, and waited for her to give up her struggling. After a few more twists
and shoves on her part, she slumped against the wall and stared up at me.

“You made your
point,” she conceded with a sigh. She was winded from the scuffle, her cheeks
flushed in the porch light.

I lowered my head
to hers. I was using every ounce of self-control to steady myself. She wasn’t
the only one breathing hard, and I was perilously close to kissing her. I
couldn’t move my eyes from her parted lips, so I squeezed them tightly closed.
Somewhere in the course of the evening, I had allowed myself to feel all of the
feelings that I had been working so hard to push aside for the last few months.
It was useless to fight it after what had happened.

Earlier, when Matt
had come into the room to tell me that some guy was harassing her, I thought I
was going to be sick. I had thrown my jeans on as fast as I could and sprinted
through the house, knocking people out of my way as I went. When I finally made
it outside and didn’t see her on the porch, my stomach dropped thinking that he
had her in a car somewhere. I could barely see through the blind rage I felt
when I moved to the side of the house and saw John making a grab for her.

And now, as my
body was pressed up against hers, I could hardly think past the sound of my own
heart racing.

“Spence,” she
breathed, alerting me to the fact that I was still pinning her to the wall. I
abruptly released her, as if her skin burned me.

I avoided her eyes
and made my way into the house. “I’m going to bed.”

***

The next morning,
I awoke with a splitting headache. I looked at the time and groaned. I must
have been more wasted than I thought last night. I wondered if Ellie was awake
yet and if we were still on for breakfast with Mills and Olivia. The memory of
what happened on the porch came back to me in a rush. I had left her standing
there against the wall, with no idea how she felt about what had happened. As I
thought about how I’d behaved, I allowed that she had every right to be pissed
at me. In fact, she might not even be here anymore.

I jumped up from
my bed and went out into the hallway. I was too chicken to just walk
downstairs, so I checked the closet where we normally kept our spare blankets.
The one that Ellie always used was missing. That was a good sign, since she
always folded up her blanket and put it away whenever she spent the night at my
house. I took a breath and closed the cabinet, pressing my forehead to it. She
was still here. Not that she had a car to leave or anything, but if she was mad
enough she might have gotten her mom to pick her up.

I started to head
down the stairs, and then looked down at myself. I was wearing only my boxer
briefs. While I knew that Ellie had seen me wearing this little before, it was
different now. I was different now. With the way I thought about her now, being
around her like this seemed completely wrong. I went back into my room and
threw on a pair of grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt, and then padded
barefoot down the stairs.

I found Ellie
sitting on the couch, a cup of coffee and the remote control in her hand. She
glanced up at me as I entered the room. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking
from the look on her face, but I knew that if I had any chance of restoring some
normalcy to our friendship I needed to act cool. Giving her a small smile, I
went into the kitchen and poured myself a cup of coffee.

“Morning,” she
said when I sat on the couch next to her.

“Morning,” I
parroted.

I fidgeted
slightly in my seat, not sure what to say. What would I say if this were just
like any other post-party morning? I would talk about the girl I hooked up with
the night before. That didn’t seem like a good idea. I would joke about one
person or another that got too drunk and caused a scene. That didn’t seem like
a good idea either. I settled on the next best option, which was whining about
how shitty I felt. “This coffee better work. I feel like ass.” I took a sip of
the hot liquid and let it burn its way down my throat.

“No cream or sugar
these days?” Ellie asked, eyeing the black coffee in my mug.

Jesus, she even
knew how I took my coffee. “I started getting used to drinking it black after
being out in the field. There was powdered cream and sugar in our MRE’s, but
ain’t
nobody got time for that!”

She smiled at my
impersonation of the popular quote. “What’s an ‘MRE?’”

“It’s like bomb
shelter food. MRE stands for Meals-Ready-to-Eat. Most of it’s pretty nasty, but
you get some good ones here and there. We ate them a lot in boot camp.”

She nodded and
turned her attention back to the television, sipping her own heavily doctored
coffee. She had always put an absurd amount of sugar and cream in her coffee,
but never finished the last few sips because all of the sugar was settled at
the bottom of the cup. I spitefully wondered if Tim knew her as well as I did.

“Are we still
going to breakfast with Olivia and Matt? I need to get my car back from them at
some point.” Ellie wondered.

“I guess. I
haven’t heard anything from them yet, have you?”

“No,” Ellie shook
her head and shifted on the couch.

She was bundled in
the comforter, but when she moved I could see that she wasn’t wearing what she
had worn to the party. She must have gone into my room when I was passed out
and gotten a pair of my sweats and one of my white undershirts. It was then
that I noticed her jeans and shirt folded neatly on the armchair. I was glad
that I had seen her wearing the sweatpants before I noticed that she wasn’t
wearing her jeans. I might have gotten a little too carried away imagining her
wearing one of my shirts and nothing else.

Running my hand
over my head, I tried to literally wipe away that image. I pulled out my phone
and sent a text to Mills asking if we were still on for breakfast. A few
moments later, my phone vibrated.

Mills: Yeah. We
just woke up. Let’s make it lunch.

Me: Cool. Noon?

Mills: K.

Me: In N Out?

Mills: K.

“Is that Matt?”
Ellie asked, nodding to the phone in my hand.

“Yeah,” I put my
phone on the table in front of me and took another drink of my coffee. “We’re
gonna
do In N Out at noon instead of breakfast.”

“Okay,” Ellie
replied.

The vibe in the
room was making me edgy. I knew that I should say something about what happened
on the porch, but I still had no idea what to say. Ellie and I were not often
at odds so this was completely new territory. Should I start with an apology?
Should I ask what she was thinking?

“Spencer,” Ellie
began, a smile playing on her lips, “we’re fine.”

I looked up at
her, startled. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I can
tell that you’re freaking out about how awkward this is, and it’s fine. We’re
fine.”

“Are you sure?”

She nodded. “I’m
sure. We were just drunk and things got a little dramatic. No big deal.”

Briefly, I
wondered if she didn’t remember the part where I had her pinned against a wall
and came close to kissing her. On the other hand, maybe she did remember, but I
did a better job than I thought of concealing that last part from her. Maybe
she just thought I was proving my point about her physical disadvantage, and
nothing more. I really hoped that was the case.

It occurred to me
that it was a really good thing that I hadn’t kissed her. If I had, that would
have been the second time in one night that someone forced a kiss on Ellie that
she didn’t want. She probably wouldn’t have wanted a kiss from me any more than
she wanted one from John. Even if she did, which she didn’t, it wouldn’t be
right to make a move on her when she’s got a boyfriend. If she was just some
random chick, I’d be fine with it. But she wasn’t.

“I’m
gonna
go upstairs and shower. Is my bag still in your
closet?” Ellie asked, standing from the couch. She had spent the night enough
times over the years to have a bag of toiletries on hand just in case.

I nodded in reply
and couldn’t help but stare as she walked out of the room. Those sweatpants
were huge on her. I didn’t think it would take much for them to fall down. I
shook my head and sighed. I was in trouble. Big trouble.