BEARedtoYouBBWShifterEroticRomanceARe (9 page)

Torborg heard the regret in the security guard’s voice and knew he had to reassure the man he meant Tarik no harm. If he failed, he knew he risked losing the guard’s loyalty. He needed everyone on his team right now, more than ever. “Let me make one thing clear. Tarik is like the son I never had, and I’m not intending on hurting him. But he’s ill and needs treatment. We need to get him into the hospital immediately…before it’s too late.”

“Yes, sir. I’ll do my best.”

“I’m counting on it. Your friend’s life depends upon you.”

* * * * *

“My mother’s name was Maryanne. My father’s, Dave. At least, that was what I’ve believed all my life.” Tarik was staring straight ahead, one hand on the padded console between the front seats. The other arm was resting on the passenger’s side window. 

Abby was driving.  They’d both agreed it was probably best he didn’t drive, just in case he decided to do the bear-morphing thing again. He hadn’t changed into a bear in a while, since that time outside the hotel, but she wasn’t about to take her chances. Even though she was positive Tarik’s mind still operated like a human being when he was in bear form, despite what he had said to the contrary, she didn’t think he’d be able to drive. There were few things she feared more than being in a car accident, thanks to an unfortunate event that had happened when she was sixteen. A few weeks after getting her driver’s license, the car she’d been driving was hit head-on by a driver who’d had a seizure. Years later, the sound of metal colliding against metal still echoed in her head.

The car was humming along at eighty miles per hour, winding through miles and miles of pine forest.  She said, “I don’t know what I would do if I learned my parents weren’t my parents and my life was a big lie.” The sweet-scented wind was whipping through the open windows, sending her hair flying all around her head. Steering with her knee, she gathered her hair into a ponytail and knotted it on top of her head. She glanced at Tarik. He looked so...troubled.

It probably wasn’t P.C. for a girl to feel sorry for a guy, at least from the guy’s point of view. Men tended to despise any form of pity.

But really, how terrible.

Tarik had thought all along that he was your average brilliant genetic researcher, or at least a member of the species Homo sapiens. How awful to find out that everything he’d believed about himself was a lie, right down to the most basic facts.

He wasn’t entirely human, nor was he an animal.

The people he’d loved and trusted all his life had lied to him.

He didn’t know who he could trust anymore.

“It isn’t great.” He glanced at her, and their gazes locked for an instant. She couldn’t look away. His eyes were full of emotion. Dark emotion. “I’m not a human being, Abby. I’m a...a dangerous product of a genetic experiment.”

Turning her attention back to the road, she reasoned, “You’re not dangerous. Not to people who aren’t trying to kill you...or me. What happened back at the hotel…that was different. I was in danger. You were protecting me. You haven’t...hurt anyone else, have you?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Of course you haven’t. Because you’re still a human being inside there, when you look like a bear.”

“That’s not entirely true, Abby. When I change, I lose some of my ability to think and reason like a man. Instinct takes over.”

“But you can still think,” she reiterated. Tarik needed reassurance now. He needed to know that he had a friend. That he wasn’t alone.

That she wasn’t afraid of him.

She wasn’t afraid of him. Was she?

“I’ve never hurt another human being before,” he said softly. “What I did to that man...it makes me wonder what else I might be capable of.”

Abby glanced at him again. Fear. Guilt. That was what she saw in his eyes. Poor guy.

She had to help him deal with it all, somehow. Maybe he just needed to rant, to let it all out. If she’d found out her parents weren’t her parents and she’d been concocted by her coworkers in a petrie dish, her DNA fused with an animal’s, she would’ve been on a rant for hours. And she could pretty much guarantee that even out there in the boonies, there’d be plenty of people who would’ve heard her bitch about it. Anyone within several miles, she’d bet.

And then she’d feel better.

She offered, “If you want to yell, scream, throw something, it’s okay. I get it. I can handle your ranting.”

He shook his head. “No. That won’t solve anything.”

“True, but it might make you feel better.” She flicked another glance his way.  Crap, he looked so freaking depressed. She had to help him, somehow. “When I’m upset, I let it out. I yell. I scream. I punch a pillow. I...cry,” she confessed.

Why did she tell him that?

His hand covered right hand, which had been resting in her lap. She flipped it over, palm up and let him weave his fingers between hers. The gesture was simple, but sweet. And it gave birth to a little twinge of emotion, deep inside. Maybe what they said was true, that tragedy created instant, deep relationships. Facing danger, human beings sought out the comfort of others. And that comfort could lead to lifelong friendships...or romances.

Was that happening here? Now?

It can’t get attached to this guy. I’m going home. All of this will soon be a distant memory.

He cleared his throat. “Tell me about yourself. Where do you live? What do you do?”

“There isn’t much to tell. I’m a low-level administrative assistant. My job sucks. I have no interesting hobbies, unless online shopping counts, and I have no admirable qualities or aspirations.”

He chuckled. It was such a warm, rich sound. She liked it. A lot. “No admirable qualities? Aren’t you being a little hard on yourself?”

“Naw.”

“You know what I think?” he asked.

“What do you think, Tarik?” She slid a warning side-eye at him.

“I think all of this snark and smartass-ness is just an act. I think you’re afraid to trust and so you hide behind your bristles, like a porcupine.”

What did he know? What the hell did he know? What?

A lot more than she thought, evidently.

At least a half dozen of smartass, snarky comebacks popped into her head. But she kept her mouth shut. Despite the fact that he’d struck way too close to home for her comfort, he didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of a lashing from her razor-sharp tongue.  

Not sure how to respond, she glanced down at their hands, still clasped together.

“I’m sorry,” he said, softly.

“No reason to apologize.” She swallowed. Hard. A big lump of something had congealed in her throat. “You were...what you said is...”

“What happened? Why are you so afraid?”

“Oh, what hasn’t happened to me?” Releasing the steering wheel, she waved the hand that wasn’t in Tarik’s grasp. “I don’t want to bore you with my boo-hoo story.”

“I won’t be bored.”

“So you say now,” she quipped.

He gave her hand a squeeze. “I mean it, please. Tell me.”

“I don’t like to talk about--“

“Please. It’ll help me...take my mind off of everything.”

She glanced at him.

Oh crap, there were those sad puppy eyes.

“Fine. I’ll tell you. But the story isn’t that long. Actually it’s short. I fell in love with this guy once, and I thought he loved me. He even mentioned the M word a few times, and I thought I would be getting an engagement ring on Christmas. Instead, I got a broken heart.”

“What happened?” he asked, softly.

“He was screwing my roommate. She moved out of our place and moved in with him the next day. The day after Christmas. The engagement ring I’d been expecting...she was wearing it by Valentine’s Day.”

“Well, that’s shitty of them.”

“It’s no biggie.” She blinked a few times. Her eyes were burning, dammit. She wasn’t going to cry. Hell no. “I’ve always believed things happen for a reason.”

“Oh, did they break up? Was it nasty?”

“No, they’re married now. She’s pregnant with their first kid. But since then, I’ve come to realize that marriage isn’t for me anyway. I like to be free, have nobody to answer to but myself.”

“I’ve always felt that way too...until now. This thing, finding out about my parents, has made me rethink my philosophy on commitment and relationships. And work. And a lot of things..”

“Hey, that’s fine for you.” She wriggled her hand, tugging it out of his. “And I totally understand why you would. But me...don’t look this way if you’re thinking about something long term--“

“Oh, I get it. You live in Michigan. I’m here in Alaska...er, Canada...wherever. I don’t know what’s going on with my job. I have no idea what’s going to happen to me. What woman would want me?”

“Lots of women,” she admitted. “That’s not the problem. You’re great. Super smart. Nice. Good looking. Like I said, I like being free, making my own decisions, not having to worry about anyone else. For example, if I decided I wanted to stay in Alaska--“

His sad puppy eyes sparkled. “Are you considering staying?” Dammit, the sparkles were so sweet.

“No. I couldn’t live here.” Could she? “I need sunlight. And I hate snow,” she said, reminding herself why living in this horrible place would never work. “I was just using that as an example. I wouldn’t have to convince anyone else to move. I could just pack up and go.” Deciding it was time to change the subject before things got even more uncomfortable, she asked, “So why do you think you started changing into a bear now, after all these years?”

Tarik cleared his throat. “Oh, there’s a good reason for that…”

* * * * *

It was amazing how close a girl could get to a person when taking a road trip.

By the time their car rolled into Eagle Ridge, Alaska, a tiny town that barely qualified as an intersection, she’d learned a whole lot about Tarik, and about science. Most of the things he talked about she couldn’t even begin to comprehend. It was kind of cute. He threw words like gene splicing and genome around like an NBA star would toss around a basketball. While she couldn’t appreciate the meaning of what he was saying, she did the way he spoke-- with such quiet awe. It was as if he verbally caressed the words. It was clear he loved the work he did, and was very committed to the good that might come out of it someday.

Despite what she’d said about not wanting him to look her way for a long term thing, she found herself wanting him to talk about her the same way, with equal respect and dare she say it…adoration.

Whether she’d wanted to or not, she was starting to fall in love with Tarik, the man. Tarik the beast. Tarik the being. She realized it as she sat across from him at some little dumpy restaurant in Eagle Ridge, watching him devour a patty melt and basket of fries.

He gave her the very last bite of the slice of chocolate pie they’d shared. Any man who did that was a keeper.

Her mood turned dark as they returned to the truck. Very soon they’d be going their separate ways. Tarik had it all planned out. They’d head into Canada. He knew of a town not far from the border where he could get internet access on his friend’s laptop. After doing a little research, he was going to contact his former boss and plead his case. They would meet. Tarik would convince him to leave them alone, and then she’d either head south, toward the southern United States-Canada border, or to the nearest airport. Rumors were the air traffic controller’s strike was just about over. In no time, she’d be back home and Tarik would return to Alaska and everything would be normal again.

Shit.

No, she wasn’t exactly thrilled about that last part, but what other choice did she have?

She had a job to go home to--granted, it was a sucky one.

She had bills to pay.

She had a best friend.

She had a life.

Sure.

Right.

Why did her life feel so empty when it had never felt that way before? She’d been content with the way things were going, all the way up until she’d stepped foot in this beautiful, wild place. Even when she’d first arrived in Alaska, she’d still been anxious to return home. It was sometime later, after she’d spent a night or two with Tarik that her attitude toward her former life had changed. She guessed it had been a gradual process, not sudden. There’d been no Big Moment when the violins had played and she’d suddenly seen her life with new clarity and all of life’s mysteries had been solved.

Really, did it matter how it had happened? How she’d gone from being quite pleased with her life to downright depressed?

No. Because it made no difference in the long run. She still had to go home and go on with things because that was what everyone did--at least everyone who kept themselves out of the mental wards of hospitals.

Maybe, if she was still in a funk after a week or two, she’d follow Katie’s advice and talk to that guy who ran the dating service downtown. Perhaps she’d finally had her fill of casual sex.

Maybe she was ready to meet someone special.

“You’re very quiet again. Are you okay?” Tarik was sitting beside her, in the passenger seat.

“I’m fine. Just trying to plan my next move—our next move.” She sounded tired, even to her own ears.

He took her hand in his and held it gently. His thumb brushed over the top of her hand, soft as feathers.

It was something, how tender Tarik could be sometimes. Quiet and warm and sensitive. And then at other times he was sexy and strong and wild. Such an odd—but wonderful!—combination. “I’m sorry you’re caught up in this. I’d give anything to end it right now. It’s like a nightmare I can’t wake up from. I’m sorry for dragging you into this mess. Turn right at the next intersection.”

“It’s not your fault.” She followed his direction and turned at the corner. “You had no idea what was going on. I feel bad for you. Learning everything you believed about yourself was a lie. Learning you have no family. No ties to anyone. That you basically don’t exist to anyone or anything but Omega.”

And me!

“Yeah. Well. As soon as I can get onto the internet, I’m going to get the facts. And then I’ll deal with Torborg. I still have friends in Omega. I’m hoping they’ll help me. Or if I have to, I’ll hack into the system. It’s not like I haven’t done it before. When I’m through digging up dirt on Torborg, he won’t have a choice but to leave you alone.”