Authors: M. Dauphin
17-
Tatum
That asshole. That mother fucking asshole.
By the time I had my way with him, there wouldn’t be any question as to who made the decisions in Molly’s life. It most definitely wasn’t him. I pounded on every door at the motel before I found his room. He opened the door, smugly standing in the opening like nothing could touch him.
“It would do you and your family good if you went back home, Rob.” I growled. Physical contact is what I wanted. I wanted to beat the shit out of him, teach him not to threaten women anymore. Especially my woman.
“Nate.” He addressed me. “Don’t you think this conversation is best inside, out of the public’s eye?”
I walked inside, ready to pounce when he started talking as he poured himself a glass of whiskey. Jesus this fucker was so smug, all I wanted to do was wipe that smirk off his mother fucking face.
“You know, I never triggered you for a man who got worked up over a woman. All we are trying to do is make sure my cousin has a successful wedding, without any drama. A Savage at a Delany wedding would most definitely bring drama.”
“Please, Rob, enlighten me as to why you would think that.”
“Oh you don’t know? Even better.” He smiled and stared at me.
“You’re about to get your ass kicked you smug mother fucker.” I ground out. He needed his face punched in,
“You know, Molly really is a looker. That hair, those expressive eyes. And that ass…man just thinking about her.” He adjusted himself and I lost it.
I swung and hit him right on the side of the face with enough force to knock him back, but not to bring him down. He smiled when he looked back at me.
“That’s it, Nate. Keep playing the good guy. We all know your truth, though. All it takes is a little bit of temptation.”
What the fuck? Who the hell is this man? The Delany’s and the Savage’s have never crossed paths before, so how does he think he knows everything about me? I need to get out of here. I need to get my father on the phone. Shit shit shit!
Leaving the Motel I see Molly walked down the street at a pretty good pace. She looks worried. Fuck how am I going to explain this to her?
“Hey babe.” I tried to act cool.
“Hey to you. Where did you go?” she was glaring at me. There were those daggers again.
“To pay a visit to your friend Rob. He won’t be bothering you anymore.” God I hope so, at least. My gut told me this was far from over, though.
“I don’t believe that for a second. Listen Tatum, I appreciate you protecting me, but you cannot go around harassing my clients!” she pokes me in the check as she whips words at me. “I have a reputation to uphold! If you can’t keep your anger and jealousy at bay then maybe you shouldn’t be here!”
The rage that was burning in me slipped out.
“What the fuck Molly!? You should be pissed he threatened you and the baby! Instead you are protecting him and yelling at me for protecting you!? That’s crazy bullshit!”
She stood there, hands on her curvy hips, stone-faced.
“Fuck this Mol, I can’t take all of this right now. I’ve got enough shit going on to have to deal with these mood swings.” Not the best choice of words, but they were out there. She had lost it! This beautiful woman had officially lost it, and it looked like she was going to attack. I may have temporarily forgotten about the pregnancy, and the side effects of pregnancy. Especially that big one: MOOD SWINGS LIKE A CRAZY BITCH. That’s what she was being right now. The woman I loved had turned into some money hungry, status searching bitch who just wanted her name to be up there with the power of the Delany’s. Well screw that.
“You know what? You want to deal with that family? Go right ahead. I’m not stopping you anymore.” I said, then I walked off. I needed to collect myself.
18-
Molly
After he ripped me a new asshole on the side of the street for being worried about my business, a business that I have worked my ass off to get where it is, Tatum walked away from me. That was three days ago. I haven’t heard his voice, I haven’t seen his face, and his motorcycle is still parked at my house. Three very long, depressing days. I don’t know where he is or if he’s coming back. The sinking feeling in my chest feels like there is a boulder trying to pull me into the darkness. A darkness I remember feeling five years ago.
This is why I chose not to love again. This feeling of despair when the person you love leaves you is awful. Second only to the despair of losing a child. Unfortunately, I’ve had enough of both of those to last a lifetime.
I haven’t been into the studio, but I’ve been working at home trying to keep my mind off of things. I haven’t heard anything from Rob. I guess I’m still doing the wedding next week since I haven’t been officially fired, but I don’t even care anymore. The Molly from three months ago would hate the girl I’ve turned in to, but I can’t help it. I loved him. Hell, I still love him. I just don’t know where he is.
A few close friends have stopped by the house to see how I was doing. I lied and told them I have a stomach bug, that way when I run to the bathroom to spill whatever was in my stomach they don’t think twice about the other reason I would be puking. They have brought me soup, bread, magazines. Never once asking where Tatum is. Never once acknowledging that he wasn’t here. It was like an unspoken rule: ‘don’t remind her that he left’.
On Friday morning, after three days without a shower (because being in there reminds me of our showers together, which would bring back the tears and depression) I finally decided it was time to step up, get cleaned up, and go to the studio. If I was still doing this wedding there were things that needed to be finalized that I just couldn’t do from home.
I pulled on my shorts that were getting way too snug for my liking, then grabbed a t-shirt and flip flops. I said I was going out, not trying to win a fashion contest. This was comfortable Molly, if the town people didn’t like it they could kiss my ass. I just didn’t care anymore. All I could think about was Tatum. How sweet he could be, how caring he was. Hell, even when he was being protective and demanding I loved him. Every part of him. I thought this was it…I thought we would make it last. A part of me still hoped for that, but I was trying to not get my hopes up. How he could walk away from me and stay away for three days with no contact has made me realize how easy it must have been for him. How could he just walk away from me like that, especially when I may be pregnant with his child?
Walking down the street I was struck with the worst pain I’ve ever experienced. My stomach felt like it was on fire and I couldn’t walk anymore. I couldn’t even stand anymore it was so bad. I knelt on the ground to try to compose myself, but the pain wouldn’t stop. Oh God what was happening!? Not again! I knew what my body was doing to me and I wasn’t going to have it! I’d already let one baby die, this was not happening again!
People came running out of the store I was in front of, talking to me, asking me questions but I couldn’t answer. All I could do was grit my teeth through the agonizing pain that was now radiating through my entire body. I was so dizzy, everything felt like it was moving. God this was awful! All I could think to myself as my body was betraying me yet again was that I wish Tatum was here. I cried, I am pretty sure I screamed, but then everything went black.
19-
Tatum
After I walked away from Molly I had some soul searching to do. I called Eddie and had him find me a place in town to rent under his name so I could have some time to myself. I loved Molly so much it hurt. I missed her so much I couldn’t move without my body aching, begging me to go back to her. I needed time, though. I went from not thinking I would ever want to love anyone, no kids, nothing. I didn’t think I wanted any of it…then this red headed, green eyed vixen waltzed into my life and everything imploded. My heart started beating again, my brain started functioning properly again, and I learned how to smile again. The news she broke the other day made me feel like I could float I was so happy.
I know walking away from her was probably not the right choice, but there was so much more going on in my head at the time. I know myself, and when I get mad I do stupid things. Stupid things like walk away from the woman you love because you think she’d be happier without you. That was really it, too. Had I not been there, her life wouldn’t be falling down around her right now. She’d have a thriving business, a best friend still, and her schedule and money situation wasn’t about to dwindle due to another mouth to feed. Of course this is a stupid way of thinking, but I’m a man. It’s what I do. It’s not that I don’t plan on going back and begging forgiveness, I just need to straighten some of my shit up first.
I had Eddie do some heavy searches into the Delany family as soon as I got in the house I’m staying in. It may not have been legal, but this guy is so good no one would ever find traces of his snooping. Mr. Robert Delany was well known in Texas for some not so nice handlings of women. This news doesn’t surprise me, actually. The first time I looked into those eyes I knew there was an evil inside of him just waiting to get out. My phone rang, bringing me out of me thoughts. Eddie better have more information for me.
“Dude, why is it that you leave town and get into more trouble than you did when you lived here?” he started.
“Shut it. Remember who pays you. What did you get?”
“Nate man...”
“Tatum. It’s Tatum.”
“Sorry TATUM. I’m surprised you never crossed this man’s path before.”
“What the hell do you mean, Eddie?” Growing impatient to his word games.
“He was Candace’s fucking BROTHER Tatum!” Eddie laughed, like it was funny this man was related to the deceased mother of my deceased child.
That’s when it all fucking clicked. The baby blanket: only family would have rights to that shit, apparently being a Delany in Texas was a big deal. That’s why no one wanted to talk about what happened to the baby stuff, because they were scared shitless of the repercussions. The note: Revenge. Shit! Even down to threatening Molly and forcing me off of the shoot. It was all because he believes I was the reason his sister was killed. Mother fucker. I need to see her. Now.
I race out the door, unshaven and still in my clothes from yesterday. Not caring who notices where I came from, not caring at all who notices I haven’t showered in three days. I need to get to her. I need to apologize. I need to make this right, then finish what Robert Delany came here to start.
20-
Molly
The words keep ringing in my head but I don’t quite think I’m processing them correctly.
I’ve been in the hospital for a day now, but I woke up from everything just a few hours ago. Since then I’ve been given a wealth of information I wish I had never heard. I wish I could just go back to sleep and wake up from this damned nightmare.
Ectopic pregnancy.
Those two words keep coming out of the doctor’s mouth, but it’s not hitting home.
There was never a baby to begin with. Well, there was technically, but there wasn’t ever a chance for it. The doctor, a middle aged woman, must have noticed I wasn’t paying attention anymore. My body failed me again.
“Molly, is there anyone you want us to call?” She asked gently, like I was going to fucking break.
“No.” I said, then I did my best to roll over pain free and curl up. The doctor left shortly after that, telling me she would be back later to check the progress of the medicine they gave me.
I really didn’t have anyone. I keep wishing I would wake up from this, but this is unfortunately as real as real life gets. Maybe I’m just not cut out for the white picket fence. Maybe I’m doomed to be the crazy cat lady.
A soft knock on the door makes me glance over, and standing there is a nurse. Tall, lanky, dark skin and buzzed head. He tilts his head to the side and smiles at me.
“Hey you, glad to see you’re awake. Up for company?”
“Sure, I guess.”
He walks in and pulls up a chair. Introducing himself as Trey, he starts spilling his guts about his day, and some boyfriend he missed. I wasn’t quite sure what he thought he was doing in a random patient’s room, but whatever it was, he was cheering me up little by little. Trey was fantabulous in every definition of the word.
“So sweet, tell me. How are you taking this?” he was referring to the news I just received, but I was just thankful that he didn’t say those two words again.
“I’ll be okay.” I managed. I didn’t want to talk about it. I didn’t want to talk about the betrayal I felt. Both from Tatum and from my body. I love that man so much, that if he waltzed back in here now I would take him back no questions asked. That says how low I’ve gotten.
“You know, it’s not the end of the world.” He tried to cheer me up.
“That’s not a very effective way to brighten someone up.” I answered. Instead of backpedaling, though, he pushed on with his theory.
“It may not seem like it, but it’s the truth. You got the cold hard facts. You now need to decide how you are going to use it. Are you going to let it ruin you, or are you going to accept it and move forward?” His gentle smile did soothe me. Maybe he was right. I could live with it, I know that much. My heart was still holding out for Tatum, though. Then the question would be if he could live with it or not. I’m not sure I could take him leaving me again.
I felt so comfortable with Trey I ended up telling him everything. Never before had I thought I’d end up telling a random nurse my life story, but it felt good being able to talk about it and not have a panic attack. We chatted for a while longer, then he left to check on other patients and I laid down for a nap. Falling asleep has been hard since Tatum left, but I was so tired from the medication that it didn’t take me long to fall into a deep slumber.