Broken Course (24 page)

Friday at eight a.m.

Me: So, are you speaking to me today?

Friday at noon.

Me: I’m not really sure what to do here. I can’t decide if something is wrong or if you’re trying to brush me off. Care to enlighten me?

Friday at six p.m.

Me: Are you kidding me with this? Together, huh? Now, you’re just going to disappear? What a load of shit.

Friday at eight p.m.

IT’S BEEN three days since I last heard from Leo, and for seventy-two hours, I’ve been a bungee cord of emotions. Finally, tonight, I decide to just get pissed and confront him.

"Where’s Leo?" I snap at Aiden as if he has any control over Leo’s being a dick.

"Shit," he cusses under his breath, stepping out from the guard’s desk. "He’s upstairs. But you shouldn’t go up there," he answers and my heart sinks.

"Is he with someone?" I whisper, my hands beginning to tremble at my sides.

"Oh God no!"

"Then why the hell can’t I go up there?"

"He’s…" he starts but doesn’t finish.

"He’s what?"

"He’s just busy. That’s all," he lies unconvincingly.

"Bullshit," I bite out, pulling my security card from my purse.

"Sarah, don’t. He’s not in good shape right now." He grabs my arm to stop me.

I pointedly look down at his hand, which he promptly releases. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Just… Go home and I’ll get him to call you."

"Aiden, don’t screw around with me here. What the hell is going on?"

He shakes his head and toys with one of the gauges in his ear. "Sarah, I don’t talk about his shit any more than I would talk about yours. Just know that this happens occasionally. Just give him a day or two. He’ll snap out of it. He always does."

"While I appreciate your discretion, I’m going up there regardless of whether you tell me or not. So I’m going to highly encourage you to do both Leo and me favor and give me a heads-up about what the hell I’m going to find up there."

He stares at me for a minute before finally answering. "Damn it, Sarah. He’s dark right now. It happens. I’ve tried to get him to see someone about it, but he won’t listen. He doesn’t do anything but mope around for a few days, so I just try to keep the business going and let him do his thing."

"Dark? Like depressed?" I ask in shock. "Leo?" I question, because we are clearly talking about two different people.

"It’s not as bad as you’re thinking," he answers, and I can’t do anything but tilt my head in confusion.

What weird alternate universe am I in? I suffer from depression and take a little pill every single day to keep it at bay, but Leo? He might be the happiest person I have ever met. He’s always smiling, and even when his jokes are bad, he never stops making them. I am fully aware that depression can affect even the loudest laugh in the room, but I never would have suspected that it was hiding behind those chocolate-brown eyes.

Without another word, I scan my card and head up the stairs. I’m not even willing to wait for the elevator. No one should be completely alone during a dark spell. Using my key, I let myself in. Quietly, I head down the hall, searching for any sign of Leo. When I reach his bedroom, I slowly swing open the door. His blackout curtains are more than doing their job. Not even the moon breaks into the room. But the hall light behind me reveals him sleeping facedown on his bed with a pillow covering his head. I take a deep breath at the sight. I’ve really missed him.

I toe off my shoes and crawl fully dressed into the bed next to him. He doesn’t budge at first, but as I drag the pillow off his head, he lets out a low growl.

"I was worried about you," I whisper, kissing his naked shoulder.

"Sarah?" His voice is jagged and filled with sleep.

"Yeah, it’s me." I lean in and kiss the lips I have been starved for. It may not bring him any comfort, but just that brief second of contact is like a drug to me. It tingles on my mouth and glides through my body, soothing me in its wake.

"I just want to be alone for a while. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Of course, baby. Go back to sleep," I whisper against his cheek while inhaling his scent. Then I simply roll over and pull the blanket over my body.

"Uhhh…" he says questioningly. "Alone?"

"Oh, I’m not leaving," I respond frankly. "You do whatever you need to do. I won’t bother you. But if you decide you want to talk, I’ll be right here."

"Sarah, I can’t argue with you right now. I really need some space."

"Then roll over. It’s a king-sized bed."

"Please," he begs, but the word catches in his throat.

"I know you think being alone is the solution. And I’m not saying it’s not. I’ll leave if you want. But you should know I’m going to be sleeping on the floor just outside the bedroom door. I’ve been where you are. I know it gets easier. I also know easier is an impossible notion for you to even entertain right now. I’m well aware you think wallowing by yourself is the only answer. However, tomorrow morning, I’m making you breakfast. You don’t have to eat it, but I’m making it all the same. I can’t fix the way you feel, not even with my famous bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich, but I can be here while you suffer. You may
want
me to leave, Leo. But as long as I’m breathing, you will never truly be alone." I almost choke on the words. They might just be the closest thing I have to tell him that could ever adequately portray my feelings. Love wouldn’t even be enough right now.

"Sarah," he starts but never finishes.

"Together. You told me that a while back. So let’s do this."

With a simple nod, he scoots over to the far side of the bed and rolls away from me. It may seem like a dismissal, but it’s a victory in my book.

Saturday…

"HEY, CAN I buy something on your Kindle?" Sarah asks from the other side of the couch.

"Have at it," I answer, uninterested.

"It might be construed as porn."

My eyes snap to hers and I blink twice. Her only response is a shrug.

"Sure," I respond then go back to staring at the ceiling.

"AS YOUR woman, can I ask Johnson to run errands for me?" Sarah asks randomly.

I lift my head from the dining room table and give her a questioning look.

"Just a small one, and it’s not like ‘go fetch me lunch’ or something."

"Then, by all means, go for it," I answer dryly.

Sarah smiles wide and I look away.

"YOU WANT something to eat?" Sarah asks.

"No," I answer shortly.

Sunday…

"I SENT Johnson to buy it for us." Sarah smiles proudly, popping in a DVD.
Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo
.

"What in the fucking hell is that?" I ask with a curled lip.

"Ohhhh, Leo. You are seriously missing out. From the self-proclaimed master of terrible eighties movies, I’m actually disappointed in you right now. This might possibly be the worst eighties movie ever to be made," she laughs.

I stretch a leg down the couch to tangle with hers.

Monday…

"I’M STARVING," I inform Sarah.

"You want me to cook you something?" She puts the Kindle down on the nightstand and rolls to face me.

"Chinese?" I suggest.

"I’ll order delivery. Sesame chicken?"

"That works," I answer absently.

"YOU DIDN’T eat much," Sarah whispers from across the bed. "You want me to get you something else?"

"Nah. That new place wasn’t very good."

"That’s the same place we always order from." She offers me a small smile.

I reach out and grab her hand, entwining our fingers. "Really? It tasted different."