‘Okay,’ Ruth said. ‘Where are Marcus and Paul? Are they having lunch?’
But her mother was busy in the kitchen and didn’t reply, so Ruth tried a different tack.
‘The room looks nice.’
‘Doesn’t it just!’ her mother said, pulling out a chair.
‘Just sit down there. Daddy will be here soon.’
The table had been formally set for three with table napkins. They both sat down to wait, the hot food sitting enticingly on the table in front of them.
Ruth could barely contain herself. She was starving.
‘When will he be here?’
‘Any minute.’
Ruth gulped. The smell was making her mouth water like crazy.
‘Could we start?’ she asked in a small voice.
‘Now, that wouldn’t be very nice, would it?’ Her mother wagged her finger playfully.
‘But maybe he’s been held up,’ Ruth said hopefully.
‘So we wait,’ her mother said, frowning. ‘Now don’t fidget, darling.’
Ruth had been mucking about with her knife to take her mind off how hungry she was, but she pulled her hand from the table and put it on her lap.
I could eat a horse and chase the jockey
. She heard Marcus’s voice in her head and suppressed a chuckle. He was always saying gross things like that.
I could eat the crutch out of a low-flying duck …
She wondered again where the boys were, but before she could ask her father walked in, whistling and carrying a smart new briefcase in one hand and some very colourful glossy brochures in the other.
‘How are my two favourite girls?’
He was exactly the same, except fatter and his hair was now jet black. The grey had gone completely.
‘So you managed to get away then, dear.’ Mrs Craze was smiling frantically, as if she might be worried about something.
‘I’m in charge now, remember?’ Mr Craze said with a jovial laugh. He kissed Mrs Craze on the top of her head and then turned to Ruth. ‘Did you have a swim, Ruthie?’
‘Yes,’ Ruth answered carefully.
‘Did you enjoy it?’ Her father sat down opposite her.
‘Yes,’ Ruth said with a smile. ‘It was great.’
‘Her style needs work.’ Mrs Craze’s expression was suddenly grim as she leaned across to serve Mr Craze some food. ‘Time we got her some private lessons, dear.’
‘Really?’ he frowned. ‘But the Crazes are excellent swimmers.’
They were?
Ruth had never heard this before. But she was too hungry to care. She looked from one parent to the other expectantly.
When could they start eating?
‘On a more positive note,’ her mother gushed, ‘doesn’t Ruth look nice?’
‘She certainly does,’ her father replied. ‘New dress?’
They prattled on as they salted their food and took sips of drink, but Ruth was so hungry she had no idea what they were talking about. Unable to hold back any longer, she picked up the burger in both hands and took one enormous bite, and then another. When she looked up, her parents were both staring at her and frowning.
‘Oh, darling.’ Her mother looked stricken.
‘You’ve forgotten your manners,’ her father said sternly.
‘Sorry.’ Ruth flushed and put the burger down.
‘Well,’ her father said dryly as he picked up his knife and fork, ‘you must be hungry.’
‘I am.’ Ruth’s face was red. ‘Sorry.’
She watched her father cut off a small, neat piece of meat, pop it in his mouth and begin to chew slowly. Her mother did the same, and Ruth, feeling almost sick with holding back for so long, tried to follow suit. It was hard at first not to swallow quickly, but after the first couple of bites she got better at it.
They ate in silence for a while. Ruth gradually grew calmer. After all, there were bound to be new rules in her new life and it was probable that she would occasionally stuff up. She’d get used to it all soon enough. Hadn’t she always complained that things were way too lax at mealtimes? She had hated the way her brothers snatched and grabbed and burped and elbowed each other at the table. Learning proper manners would be part of her new life and she was going to …
embrace
it. She was.
Definitely
.
‘You got the movies for Ruth’s party, I take it?’ Mrs Craze asked her husband.
‘Sure did.’ Mr Craze reached into the briefcase he’d put down beside his chair and pulled out a couple of plastic DVD cases.
A party?
Ruth felt a flicker of panic but was too nervous to ask any questions, the main one being
who would come?
Perhaps she had a whole lot of new friends that she hadn’t met yet.
She turned the plastic cases over so she could see the movie titles. She’d heard of one but not the other. The idea of a party was playing havoc with her stomach. She felt queasy, as though the food she’d just eaten had morphed into a lump of granite inside her. She wasn’t at all sure she’d be able to manage a party.
‘That is the one you wanted, isn’t it?’ Mr Craze asked. ‘The other I thought you might like.’
‘Oh, thanks,’ Ruth muttered, trying to smile. ‘Looks fantastic.’
‘Could I have some more soft drink?’ Ruth asked. Mrs Craze turned and looked at her severely.
‘Could I or
may I
?’
‘May I?’ Ruth said in a small voice.
‘I’m not sure if that is a good idea, dear,’ her mother said softly. ‘You’ve got your party this afternoon, remember.’
Ruth nodded as though she totally agreed but
what did that have to do with having another drink?
She tried to smile but she could feel the heat rising into her cheeks.
Her mother was smiling at her. ‘You don’t want to overdo it now, do you?’
‘No.’ Ruth shook her head.
They were both looking at her now, just as though she was a greedy little girl half her age who needed to be told how much she could eat.
Lunch over, her father folded up his brochures. ‘So, when does the party start?’ he asked cheerfully.
Ruth looked at her mother, who was clearing the table, and tried to stay calm. It was just that her real father never took the slightest interest in parties. Come to think of it, Ruth couldn’t remember there being a party at their house
ever
, so this was all still very new.
‘Like a coffee, darling?’ Mrs Craze asked her husband from the kitchen.
‘I’ll have it in the study, thanks.’ He pushed his chair away from the table and smiled down at Ruth and ruffled her hair. ‘I’ve got some catch-up work to do. You have a lovely time with your friends, Ruthie, and I’ll see you later for the birthday tea.’
‘Dad?’ Ruth was determined to catch him before the opportunity slipped away or she lost her nerve. ‘What happened to all your inventions?’
Both her parents stopped and looked at her, puzzled frowns on their faces. Their polite smiles unnerved Ruth further but she tried not to show it.
‘What are you talking about, Ruth?’ Her father frowned as though he was trying to remember something.
‘You used to work on them all the time,’ Ruth went on gamely.
‘Oh,
that
!’ Her father gave a dismissive wave and laughed. ‘I gave up that rubbish ages ago! It wasn’t getting me anywhere. It was costing money, not making us any. I finally got sensible.’
‘What about you, Mum?’ Ruth said tentatively. ‘Are you still making pots?’
Mrs Craze threw back her head and laughed heartily, except that it didn’t sound like a real laugh.
‘Goodness me, no!’ she said. ‘That time was so long ago I can hardly remember it!’
‘And the boys?’
The smiles suddenly disappeared. They were both staring at her in a hard way, as though they were challenging her to go on.
‘
Who?
’ her mother said coldly.
‘My brothers?’ Ruth whispered.
For a few moments there was a heavy silence. Her parents continued to stare at her stonily. Ruth knew that she’d said the wrong thing and part of her wanted to backtrack, but somehow she couldn’t. Then something quite weird happened. Mrs and Mrs Craze turned to each other and began to laugh.
‘Oh my goodness!’ Mr Craze had to get his hanky out to wipe his eyes.
‘Oh, isn’t she sweet!’
‘Bringing them up!’
‘Hilarious!’
Ruth tried to smile because they were finding it so funny.
‘You are a funny one,’ Mrs Craze chuckled, coming around and smoothing Ruth’s hair out of her eyes.
Being up close to her new mother, Ruth could see what was different about her. There was no light in her eyes at all. She looked over at her father and a shiver of alarm ran through her because … his were the same. It was as if their eyes were made of something else. Something dead, like stone or … Her breath caught again.
Calm down, Ruth. Calm down.
‘Ruth, what is it?’
‘Nothing.’
‘Your face has gone white, dear.’ Her mother’s concerned, smiling face moved even closer. ‘Aren’t you feeling well?’
‘I’m fine.’ Ruth gulped. ‘Really, just a bit …’ ‘A bit what, dear?’
Embarrassed, Ruth shrugged and turned away. Their eyes were making her feel strange. But she couldn’t say
that
.
Mrs Craze took Ruth’s arm. ‘What about a little rest before the others come over?’
Ruth couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a rest in the middle of the day, but she let her mother help her up from the table. Maybe it would be nice to have some time on her own. She needed to calm down a bit and … get used to things.
‘Yeah, maybe I’ll have a read or something,’ she mumbled.
‘Good idea.’ Mrs Craze gripped her arm firmly. ‘Come on into the reading room.’
The reading room?
Mrs Craze was leading her into the hallway. She pushed open the door to Paul’s old room and Ruth stopped in the doorway and stared in wonder.
The room used to be full to bursting with her little brother’s junk. All his toys were usually spread out over the floor, along with his clothes, his books and his sports equipment. The curtains used to be torn and the wallpaper faded and peeling. Not one skerrick of any of that was left. An odd, flat feeling made her feel for a moment that she might cry. It was as if her little brother had never existed! His room had been painted and redecorated with nice curtains and tasteful prints, making it look much bigger. One whole wall was now a bookcase and it was filled with books and CDs and expensive-looking vases and ornaments. There were a couple of easy chairs and a big cream sofa under the window that looked particularly inviting.
She didn’t cry because … this was
exactly
what she wanted.
‘Have a lie-down there.’ Her mother gently pushed Ruth towards the cream sofa. Ruth did as she was told; she kicked off her sandals and lay down, resting her head on one of the big puffy cushions. She had never even sat on such a plush couch before. Lying there made her feel like a queen. ‘I’ll bring you over some magazines,’ her mother said, ‘then leave you alone.’
‘Okay, thanks, Mum.’ Ruth took the magazines.
Vogue
,
Harpers
,
Hello!
Imagine if all her old friends could see her now! How envious would they be?
‘See you in an hour, sweetie.’ Her mother smiled from the doorway. ‘You have a nice relax.’
‘Thanks, Mum.’
Ruth picked the first magazine up off the pile. She flipped through the hot new looks for next autumn and a gossip article about an actress that she had never heard of and yawned. She picked up the next magazine and read about a society wedding in England with eight bridesmaids and all the men in kilts. After looking at every picture she put that one down, too, and simply lay there trying to familiarise herself with her new life. How wonderful it was. How lovely this room was. Everything was in its place. Everything was perfect.
Ruth loved the huge blue-and-white planter in one corner filled with maidenhair fern, and the nifty little ceramic table with a polished wooden chess set on top. She yawned again, remembering how she used to occasionally play chess with Marcus. In spite of the age difference they were of equal ability, more or less. He won sometimes; other times she did. But he never seemed to mind too much when she won. In fact, he was always nice about it.
‘You’re pretty good, Ruthie,’ he’d say as he packed the pieces away. ‘For a girl,’ he’d add, just to tease her. Some guys would hate to be beaten by their little sister.
Ruth was beginning to feel drowsy. The warm sun was shining in through the window and she was feeling so comfortable. She looked over to the corner where Paul used to keep all his special stuff – the plastic figurines, the dragons and cars and superheroes, his video games and all his board games – and a pang of something that felt almost like sadness went through her. She closed her eyes
.
* * *
She is wandering all alone in her new back garden. Along the paved paths and past the rows of roses. How lovely everything is! She goes past the swimming pool and the new gazebo, down towards the row of trees by the back fence. A strange little shed behind the trees is grabbing her attention. Funny that she didn’t notice it before. Her curiosity grows as she gets nearer. Ruth takes a quick look at the house. She can see through the big glass windows that her mother is sitting on the couch and she can hear the canned laughter from the television.