Courting Constance (Fountain of Love) (8 page)

Charles kissed her lips softly.  “I feel like I’ve been waiting my whole life to hear those words.”  He rolled between her legs and reached down a hand to guide himself to her core.  “I love you!” He plunged into her just as he gave her the words she so desperately needed to hear.

Constance clutched his shoulders as she felt him push through her maidenhead and deep into her body.  She cried out softly with the pain, staring up into his eyes. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.  Did I hurt you?”  He stroked her cheek as he held still within her waiting for her to adjust to his invasion. 

“Just a little.”  She pulled his head down for a kiss.  “Do you really love me?  You’re not just saying it because I did?”

“Of course I’m not just saying it.  I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my life.”  He rubbed his thumb across her lips.  “My whole life I’ve wanted a real love…not just someone who would do her duty and bear children for me.  I knew the moment I saw you at my sister’s house you were my real love.”

She sighed happily, content that he loved her, even though she knew then she would never enjoy this part of marriage.  She could close her eyes and let him have his way.  She was disappointed, though.  She’d hoped for so much more with him.  “I knew the first time I saw you on your horse.”

“Are you feeling better now?  Does it still hurt?”

She thought about that for a moment.  “No, it doesn’t hurt anymore.  I just feel…full.”

“Just so you’re not in pain.”  His mouth dipped to cover hers as he began moving inside her. 

Constance waited for the pain to continue, but she was surprised to feel only pleasure.  His motions felt good to her, not bad, which surprised her to no end.  After the initial shock of his invasion, she’d thought she’d only receive pain from doing this.

Within moments, she was not only putting up with his invasion, but enjoying it immensely.  Each stroke of his body in and out of hers made her quiver with pleasure.  She felt her body clenching as if something wa
s about to happen.  She didn’t know what, but whatever it was, it felt good.

Her body began to quiver as she tightened around him, calling out his name as she reached her climax.

Charles let himself go as soon as she did, finishing soon after her.  He rolled to his side and pulled her into his arms, kissing her forehead and holding her as if she were a precious object.  “Thank you for being my wife, even though I was so rude to you at first.”

She shook her head.  “You were never rude to me.”

He sighed.  “I asked the woman that I love to be my mistress.  That was rude.  I should have known right away that you could only be my wife.  I don’t know what I was thinking asking you something like that.”

Constance stroked his cheek, kissing him softly on the lips.  “You knew you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me despite what Society would think about that.  I appreciate that in a man.”

He sighed holding her contentedly.  “You are the woman I’ve waited my entire life for.  Thank you for being my wife.”

Epilogue

Constance sat in her parlor with Lily while the twins played on the floor at their feet.  They had just started crawling, so the ladies had placed a chair on its side on the floor to prevent them from escaping.  Constance had her feet up on an ottoman, because she knew if Charles came by and she didn’t, he would be upset with her.

Lily smiled, eyeing her sister-in-law’s very pregnant belly.  “I can’t wait until you give the girls a cousin or two.  Maybe you’re having twins too!”

Constance shook her head.  “Why would you wish that on me?”  She couldn’t believe after the trouble Lily had when her babies were first born that she would want anyone else to have to go through the chaos that was the first few months of life with twins.

Charles stood outside the parlor door, his hand on the doorjamb trying to decide if he wanted to scale the small wall his sister had erected.  “Are you trying to keep me out or the babies in?” he asked.

Lily turned to him with a grin.  “The babies in, of course.”  She winked at him.  “Constance would never forgive me if I blocked you out.  She’s partial to you for some absurd reason.”

Charles stepped over the chair barricade and walked to sit on the sofa beside his wife.  “What brings you here anyway?” he asked his sister rudely.

Lily shrugged.  “I figured you missed me so much you couldn’t bear to be without me for another minute, so I packed up my babies and came over.”

He eyed her skeptically.  “Is it the nurse’s day off again?”

Lily blushed so deeply, he knew immediately he’d hit on the problem.  “Constance isn’t your nurse anymore.”

Lily shook her head.  “That’s not it at all.  I don’t need help with the babies…well, I do, but that’s not why I’m here.  I came by to see Constance, because I hate being alone on days that Kit is off somewhere else.   It’s his day to help out at the orphanage.”

Charles settled onto the sofa and slipped his arm around his wife’s shoulders dragging her to his side.  “I guess that’s all right then.  I do think it’s noble to love your husband so much you can’t bear to be without him.”

“You would.”

Constance chuckled softly.  “I sure can tell you two are siblings.”  She patted her belly.  “I hope this is only one, but I need to have at least two or three children.  Not for the heir and a spare, thing.  I couldn’t care less about that.”

“Not nice!” Charles told her, although he said it with a twinkle in his eye.

“I want more than one, so my child can have a sibling.  Watching you two together, and James when he’s around?  It makes me realize everything I missed out on by not having any siblings of my own.”

Lily looked at Charles with a baffled look.  “Do you say nice things about me when I’m not around or something?”

“Never!”

Constance just laughed.  The love between the siblings was almost as obvious as the love between her and Charles, and between Lily and Kit.  She would spend the rest of her life having babies if that’s what it took for her children to have the kind of camaraderie.  She couldn’t wait.

Curious about Lily and Kit's story?  Read on for an excerpt from Loving Lily.

Prologue

May, 1799 

Lily was six when she met the boy she knew she would love for the rest of her life.  Not many six year olds would recognize something like that, but Lily was more aware than most. 

She’d sneaked off to run through the woods barefoot, which was her favorite springtime fun.  Of course, her father didn’t consider that a worthy pursuit for a young lady.  He wanted her to spend her days in the nursery with her nanny, learning to embroider and act like a lady.  He didn’t much like her climbing trees either, but that had never stopped her.

Through the trees, she saw him, high atop his horse.  He was with an older gentleman who she later learned was his father.  He followed along after his father, but when his father got off his horse to speak with hers, he dismounted, and followed the trail into the woods instead.

When she saw him coming her way, she scurried up the nearest tree as agilely as any monkey.  She sat on one of the branches just over the path and watched as he walked below her.  If he’d looked up, he’d have seen her bare foot dangling over his head, but he didn’t look up.

Lily had to cover her mouth to keep her giggles from being too loud, but still he heard her.  He walked back to where she sat in the tree looking up at her.  “Who’re you?”

She had never talked to a strange boy before.  She talked to her older brothers, of course, but they were off at Eton now.  She didn’t have much chance to leave their family’s estate, so she rarely had the opportunity to talk to anyone to whom she wasn’t related.  Except the servants, of course.  Not that she was complaining.  She loved the area surrounding her home.  It was a child’s fantasy land.

She stared down at him for a moment and decided answering wouldn’t hurt her.  “I’m Lily.  This is my family’s land.”

“Oh, my dad came here to see your dad then.  He’s the earl?”

She nodded.  “Yeah.  And Mama was the countess.  She died, though.  I killed her.”  She whispered the last words as if they were some sort of sinful secret.

“How’d you kill her?” he asked fascinated by this little girl.  He was ten, and soon to be off to Eton, but he considered himself almost grown up compared to this little thing. 

She shrugged.  “I didn’t mean to.  It happened when I was born.”

“Oh.  That just happens sometimes.  It’s not your fault she died.”

Lily’s eyes widened.  “It’s not?”

He shook his head.  “No.  Did someone tell you it was your fault?”

“No, but they sometimes look at me like they blame me.”

“I’m sure no one blames you.”  He looked up at her for a moment before asking, “Do you need help down from there?”

Lily looked around her.  She climbed this tree all the time.  She didn’t need help.  But he looked so strong, and willing.  Maybe she should let him help her down.  Her nanny was always telling her that gentlemen liked ladies who were helpless.  “Yes, please.”

She scooted across the branch to the trunk, and wrapped her arms around it like usual.  She put her foot on the knot and scurried down.  She was beside him before she remembered she was supposed to let him help her.

She gave him a perplexed look.  “I’m sorry.  I forgot to let you help.  I can climb it again, so you can help me down!”

He laughed.  “Nahh.  It looks like you’ve got it figured out.”  He started walking deeper into the woods.  “How come you’re not up in the nursery?  Are you supposed to be out here?”

She shook her head.  “Papa would be very disappointed in me if he knew I was here.  He thinks ladies should practice embroidery and always look perfect.”  She looked down at her bare feet.  “And always wear shoes.”

“Well, I don’t think you’re any less a lady than you would be with shoes on,” he said courteously.

“Thank you!”  She knew then she loved him.  She wanted to marry him.  Of course, she’d have to wait until she was older.  Wait, could she marry a man whose name she didn’t know?  How could she tell Papa which man she wanted?  “You never told me your name.”

“Christopher.  My brothers call me Kit.”  He liked the nickname, but his father wouldn’t use it.  Of course, Father wasn’t very interested in him anyway.  His oldest brother, Jack, was the heir.  His brother Harold was the spare.  He was the spare’s spare, and no one needed a spare for their spare. 

“May I call you Kit?”

“I’d like that.”  She was a funny little thing.  She spoke as if she were already grown.  Her red hair was braided and hung down her back.  Her eyes were what really enchanted him, though.  They were the same shade of green as the leaves. 

“How many brothers do you have?  I have two.  They’re at Eton now.”  She jabbered on as they walked.

“Two. The oldest, Jack, is at Cambridge.  My other brother, Hal, is at Eton.  I go to Eton next year,” he added importantly.

“I don’t get to go away to school.  I hate being a girl sometimes.”  She kicked a rock out of her way as they wandered along.

He caught her arm.  “You’d look awful funny in that dress if you were a boy,” he told her.  When she grinned up at him, he knew it had been the right thing to say.  “We’d better turn around and go back.  My father won’t like it if he can’t find me when it’s time to go.”

“I’m glad I met you.”  Was that a good way to tell him to come back when she was old enough to get married? 

They walked silently for a while.  Finally the house was within sight through the trees.  “I have to go find my shoes and sneak back to the nursery before Nanny wakes up from her nap.”

He grinned.  “Is that how you got out?”

“That’s how I get out every day.”  She held out her hand.  “It was a pleasure meeting you.”  The words had been pounded into her head so many times she could never forget to say them.

He bowed over her hand, kissing her knuckles.  “I hope to see you again, my lady.”

She giggled softly.  “I hope so too, Kit.”  She turned and ran in the direction of the servant’s entrance.  It was the only way to get in without being noticed.  She sat on the floor and pulled her shoes on, running up the stairs. 

She was sitting on her bed, playing with a porcelain doll she’d gotten for her birthday when Nanny woke up to check on her.  Nanny didn’t mention the dirt on her dress as she changed her.  Just as she knew that Lily wouldn’t mention her nap to her father.

Chapter One

June 1811

Lily sat through the long process of having her hair fixed just right.  Her father insisted it was time for her debut in a few months, but talked him into a small house party first.  Not that she was nervous about her first season in London.  It was just that she wanted to see if it could be avoided. 

Kit should be finished with university this year.  Maybe he would be there.  He would sweep her off her feet, and Papa would agree there was no need for a season when she’d already found her true love.  He’d offer a huge dowry, because as a third son, Kit would need it, and they would live happily ever after. 

She hadn’t seen him since that day in the woods, but she remembered him perfectly.  He had hair that was so dark it was almost black and the warmest brown eyes she’d ever seen.  What else did she really need to know?

“Ow!  Be careful, Bernice.  I want to have some hair left for the party,” she joked.  In truth, her maid had become her closest friend.  She knew Papa would cringe if she ever said such a thing aloud, but there were no other young ladies around for her to befriend.

“I’m sorry, Lady Lily.”

“We’re alone!  How many times do I have to tell you to drop the formalities when we’re alone?”

“Sorry!”

“Are you almost finished?”  Lily knew she should be more patient, but it wasn’t in her nature.  She couldn’t stand sitting still and doing nothing.  She’d still rather be running barefoot through the woods than anything else in the world. 

Papa had finally asked his sister, Aunt Margaret, to come live with them.  Margaret was a widow and a stickler for rules of propriety.  Papa was certain Aunt Margaret could
tame her.  Lily sighed as she looked down at her hands.  She may not have been tamed, but she certainly knew how to pretend she was.

“Yes. Your hair is going to look glorious!”

Lily smiled.  It had to look perfect for Kit.  She knew she shouldn’t count on him coming, but she’d seen his father several times over the years as he’d come to do business with hers.  Surely his family would be invited.

Finally, her hair finished, she stood to allow Bernice to help her into her dress.  It was made of silk and a deep forest green.  It matched her eyes perfectly.  When she was dressed, she looked into the mirror and sighed.  “Yes, that’s just right.”  She turned and threw her arms around her maid.  “Thank you!  My hair is just like Mama’s in the portrait in the hall.”

“I’m glad you like it.”  Bernice hugged her back for a moment, and then walked in a slow circle around her, trying to be sure everything was just right.  “Remember not to kick your shoes off.”

Lily sighed.  “I hate shoes.  And these new slippers pinch my toes.  My dress is so long, what difference would it make if I danced without them?”

Bernice laughed.  “Your papa would have my head.  You have to behave like a lady.  Just this once!”

“I’ll try.”  Lily looked down at the floor as she said the words.  She knew she was the bane of her father’s existence.  He wanted her to be the perfect lady and marry well.  She didn’t care if she married well, as long as she married Kit.

Her father knocked on her door.  “Are you ready, Lily?”

“Yes, Papa.”  She walked to the door and took his arm.  Tonight she would be presented to the people at the small country dance her father had her aunt arrange.  She walked as gracefully as possible to the top of the stairs.

They descended slowly.  She kept her chin up the entire time as she’d been taught.  Finally they reached the bottom, and he presented her to a young man who immediately took her arm and twirled her away in a dance. 

She’d have to wait until she got to London and was given permission before she danced the waltz, but she’d had a dance teacher come to teach her all of the dances she could possibly be expected to dance, both here and in London.

She made small talk with the young man she danced with, trying to keep her eyes on his face to show she was interested in what he had to say, but her eyes were constantly searching the room.  Was Kit here?  Would she even be able to recognize him if he was?  It had been twelve years since their first meeting.  Surely, he would have changed in that time.  She knew she had.

She curtseyed politely at the end of the dance and the young man returned her to her father.  She thanked him sweetly for the dance.

Her father then presented her to the man she knew was Kit’s father.  “Lily, this is the Viscount Burgess.”

She smiled.  Were his sons with him?  “I’d like you to meet my sons.  This is Jack, my eldest.”

Lily held out her hand for him to kiss.  Jack looked faintly as if he could be related to Kit.  “It’s nice to meet you.”

Jack nodded.  “The pleasure is mine.”

Viscount Burgess indicated the young man on his other side.  “This is my second son, Harold.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Burgess.”  She held her hand out for him as well.  She couldn’t help but wonder if the brothers felt like they were kissing one another as they each kissed the same spot on her hand.

“And you, Lady Lily.”  His eyes met hers and she smiled.  He had the same eyes as Kit.

She looked at the viscount expectantly waiting for him to introduce Kit.  Was he here?  “And are these your only sons?”  Her father glanced at her reprovingly.  She knew she shouldn’t have said it, but she had to know if Kit was there.

“No, my third son is…where is Christopher anyway?”  He turned to his eldest son to ask that.

“He’s standing right behind you, Father.”  Jack gestured to the young man behind him.

“Ah, yes.  Here we are.  My third son, Christopher.”

Lily raised her eyes expectantly.  Did he remember her?  She held her hand out to the man in question. 

“Lady Lily.  It’s wonderful to meet you.”  His eyes danced as he brought her fingers to his lips.  “Would you care to dance?”

Lily smiled.  “I’d love to.”  He looked older, of course, but the laughter was still there in his chocolate eyes.  She gripped the muscle of his arm through his black jacket, and knew she was holding him too tightly, but she didn’t care.  She was keeping this man.  “I hoped you’d come,” she whispered just loudly enough for him to hear.

He smiled.  “I wouldn’t have stayed away.  I wasn’t sure you’d remember me.”  He paused for a moment.  “You were very young the first time we met.”

“How could I forget you, Kit?”  She paused for a moment, knowing that she should be making polite conversation when all she wanted to do was beg him to ask her father for her hand.  “Are you finished with your studies now?”

“Finally!  I won’t say I didn’t enjoy them, because I did, but I’m happy to be finished.”

“What will you do now?” she asked.

He shrugged.  “Honestly, I’m not entirely certain.  I do hope to marry, though.”  He stared deep into her eyes as he said those words.  “Soon.”

She smiled.  “Do you have a bride picked out then?”  She only wanted one answer, of course.  If he gave any other, she may very well throw a temper tantrum right there on the dance floor.  She smiled to herself.  Wouldn’t her aunt and father be surprised at that?

He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers.  “If she’ll have me, of course.  You see, I’ve known for years the kind of wife I wanted.”

“Really?  Tell me about her.”

“Well, she has to have copper-colored hair.  And forest-green eyes.  And, this is the most important part.”  He leaned forward as if he were imparting a secret.

She felt herself drawn to him as if by a magnet.  She leaned in for the last part.  “What?”

“She must hate to wear shoes on warm spring days,” he whispered.

She laughed aloud.  “I tried to convince my aunt that I would be a more graceful dancer without slippers, and told her that I shouldn’t wear them tonight.”  She flicked up the hem of her gown to show him the slippers that peeked out from under.  “Alas….I lost that argument.”

He chuckled.  “Those don’t look too terribly confining,” he said. 

“They pinch my toes.  I hate shoes.”  She sounded so forlorn that he was tempted to get to his knees and remove her slippers right there and then.

He wished he could pull her to him for a kiss then, but knew it would never do.  Not here.  “Will you meet me tonight?”

She knew it wasn’t proper.  She knew the correct answer was a loud “no” and a dressing down.  Instead she heard herself whisper, “What time and where?”

“In the woods, under the tree where I first met you.  The party should be over at midnight, so shall we say one?”

She nodded.  She knew she shouldn’t, but she didn’t care.  This was Kit, and she was going to marry him.

They didn’t dance together again that evening.  It wouldn’t have been proper, and with her father watching her so closely, she knew that propriety was important.  She danced with all the young bachelors there, and even some of the older ones.  She knew they were all interested in the generous dowry they expected her father to settle on her. 

It was a long night, and the only thing that kept her going was the promise of stolen time with Kit at the end of it.  Oh, she wouldn’t have to have a London season after all.  She’d be engaged before she had to go off and live in the hustle and bustle of the city.  She was a country girl, and although Hyde Park sounded nice, there was nothing else the city had to offer that she wanted.

Bernice helped her undress at the end of the long evening.  She had already picked out a day dress in her mind that she would wear when she sneaked out to meet Kit.  Bernice left her all tucked up in her bed, feigning sleep. 

As much as she trusted Bernice, Lily knew her friend was paid by her father.  She couldn’t trust her with a secret this big.  She couldn’t trust anyone with a secret this big.

After the door closed behind her maid, Lily counted to one-hundred slowly.  She wanted to be sure she gave her enough time to come back in if she was going to.  Finally, she flung the covers back and quickly threw off her nightgown.  She flipped through her closet until she found the dress she wanted and slipped it over her head.  She’d made sure to choose one that buttoned in the front so she wouldn’t need help.

She was halfway down the backstairs when she realized that she’d forgotten her shoes.  She still wore them as seldom as she could get away with.  She laughed.  Kit wouldn’t mind.  She walked quickly across the lawn and spotted him under the tree he had designated as their meeting place.

As soon as she saw him, she slowed her walk, watching him as he stood under the tree, waiting for her.  His focus was on the tree limb above him, so he didn’t see her as she approached.  With her bare feet, she made no sound.  Finally, she was close enough to touch him and did just that.  Her hand reached out to his arm and gave it a light squeeze.

He turned to her with a smile, taking her hand and pulling her deeper into the woods.  Finally, he stopped and turned to her, setting down the lantern he’d carried with him.  “When was the last time you climbed that tree?” he asked nodding in the direction they’d come from.

She shrugged.  “Last week, I think,” she answered honestly.  She smiled up at him sweetly.  “I’ve outgrown climbing trees in my old age.”

He pulled her into his arms slowly, his head lowering to hers.  It was her first kiss, and she was eager for it.  She pressed her lips to his and wrapped her arms around his shoulders.  “Open your mouth,” he whispered against her lips.

She gasped in surprise at his words, but it was enough.  His head swooped down again and his tongue found entrance.  His hands pulled her close against him, and she felt a jolt of surprise.  Was it okay to kiss this way?  Surely not.  Her aunt had told her to let no man kiss her until after she was married, and then only her husband.  Her aunt had set herself up as the moral gauge in Lily’s life.  Lily chose to ignore her whenever possible. 

After a moment, he trailed his lips to her ear, whispering softly, “I want you to be my wife.”

She clung to his shoulder tightly.  “Talk to my father.”  She knew her father would accept Kit.  He was a gentleman after all.  And her father wanted her to be happy. 

“Do you think he’d accept?  Me being a third son and all?”  He had no clue how he’d support a wife, but he didn’t care.  He had some money, and they could live with his family for a time.  Whatever it took, as long as he had this woman by his side, he knew that life would be good.

He hadn’t gone to the party planning to marry her.  He wondered if she’d even remember him.  He’d half expected to meet the pretty little girl from the woods, but in her place was a beautiful woman.  He’d deliberately hidden himself behind her father so he could observe her unnoticed. 

At first, he’d been certain her father had finally managed to crush her impish spirit, which had saddened him for reasons he couldn’t explain.  Then, he’d had to work to prevent himself from laughing when she’d demanded to know if his father
had presented all of his sons.  In truth, his father probably wouldn’t have gotten around to introducing him.  He was a third son, after all, and not expected to marry well at all. 

When he’d stepped forward and taken her hand, he’d known that the happy little hoyden who’d been certain she killed her mother still lived in the well-groomed lady.   He knew then, without a shadow of a doubt, that he wanted to marry the lady and raise many more wild little girls who would know their own minds and hate being locked up in the nursery.