Defensive (24 page)
I walked out to the platform overlooking the ocean, where I would be marrying the love of my life. Almost everyone was seated, waiting for the ceremony to start. It felt like the hours had been ticking away at a snail’s pace; two o’clock was taking forever. I glanced down at my watch. One forty-five. Only fifteen more minutes.
I looked over at my dad, who nodded his head at me. That was his way of saying I had this and congratulations all in one. I nodded back and looked over at Landon and Eric. Eric was busy talking about some fish he had seen earlier in the day.
The minister came out and I stepped beside Ray on the platform. Music started and two of my cousins ushered Vanessa’s mom and my mom down the aisle to their seats. A small time later, Amanda came down the aisle. I’m sure she looked pretty, given the looks on Landon and Ray’s faces, but I couldn’t tell. All I cared about was seeing Vanessa.
The music changed. It felt like hours went by before I saw Vanessa and Walter walk down the aisle. My heart stopped; so did my breathing. She was absolutely stunning. She was wearing a white sleeveless dress that looked like it floated behind her in the sand.
After she made her way to me and her dad had given her away, I took her hand and kissed it. “Wow,” I said and everyone laughed.
“Thank you,” she whispered with a nervous smile.
We went through the typical wedding stuff, but all I can remember is the part where the minister announced, “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
I picked her up to my eye level and kissed her hard. I didn’t give a shit that our parents were watching. She was my wife now and I wanted to kiss her. She kissed me back and slipped her tongue inside my mouth, making me groan. I wanted to skip the reception and move on to the wedding night. I finally pulled apart when I heard several people cough and say “get a room.”
I looked around and everyone was smiling and laughing. I pulled Vanessa close to me. “I love you, Mrs. Berrios.”
“I love you, too, husband.”
Vanessa
I woke up in the middle of the night feeling a horrible cramp. Not this again. I couldn’t take it again.
“Are you okay, babe?” Jackson asked from beside me in bed.
“Yeah. Just Braxton Hicks again. I was really hoping I’d sleep better tonight than I did last night,” I told him as I soothed my hand over my stomach.
“Is there anything I can get you? Let me get you a glass of water.” He got out of bed and I watched him walk out of the room then laid back down.
What the hell is that?
I could feel wetness underneath me.
Shit, did I just pee the bed?
I crawled out of the bed, heading for the bathroom when Jackson entered the room. “What are you doing?” he asked.
“Nothing. Just, um… don’t lie down until I get back,” I told him as I felt it running down my legs.
“What? Why? I’ll put your water on the nightstand.”
“I peed the bed, okay?” I blurted out as I walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. I had been getting ticked off easily the last couple of months. He hadn’t even done anything yet I wanted to go back out there and hit him. I sat down on the toilet but I couldn’t stop peeing. That’s when it clicked that it wasn’t pee. My water had broken.
Instantly, I was terrified. I was going to have to give birth to this child. I had been counting down to this moment since we’d found out I was pregnant on our first wedding anniversary. I had practically been on bed rest the entire time because of Jackson, not the doctor. My doctor had figured out that I had low progesterone levels early on in the pregnancy, which may have caused my previous miscarriages, but everything else had been normal. If Jackson had his way, though, I would have been in a wheelchair the entire time, not lifting a muscle.
I ran into the closet, trying to find dry clothes to change into when he knocked on the bathroom door. “Are you okay?” he asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just come in the closet. You need clothes,” I hollered at him.
I heard him open the bathroom door and step into the closet. “What are you doing?”
“I didn’t pee. My water broke,” I barked, not looking up from digging through my clothes.
“Babe, are you serious?” He whirled me around.
“Yeah. I can’t get it to stop so I’m looking for some pants that I don’t mind ruining,” I told him as another contraction hit me.
“Okay, yeah, um… let me get some clothes on and I’ll load our bags into the car.”
An hour and a half later, I was hooked up to different machines monitoring the baby and me. I had answered a million questions that made me wonder why I had even bothered to pre-register. I was pretty sure I had already answered half of them. The contractions were coming steadily and I was hurting.
“I need the damn epidural,” I told Jackson.
“Okay. They said the anesthesiologist is on his way,” He said, stroking my hand. The overwhelming feeling of wanting to hit him came over me again. It was easy for him to sit there and wait while I was in what seemed like an unnatural amount of pain. “Here he is.”
“Thank God,” I yelled out. I didn’t care if I looked like a bitch. I didn’t care about anything besides numbing the pain and pushing the baby out of me.
The epidural didn’t take long and I instantly felt more relaxed knowing that it was over with. Or at least the epidural part was. I leaned back onto the bed, feeling a little bad about wanting to hit Jackson. I knew he hadn’t done anything wrong and was just being supportive, but sometimes he just annoyed me.
A half hour later, the nurse was yelling for the doctor because the baby was coming. I wasn’t in a lot of pain but I was scared. It was an overwhelming feeling that I couldn’t describe. I was going to push a baby out of my body.
“Okay, when I tell you to push, push,” the doctor said as he sat down in front of me.
I focused on Jackson’s eyes as everything became a blur. The only noise I heard was the doctor saying “push.” I pushed as hard as I could until finally I heard the sound of crying. I looked up to see the most beautiful, dark-haired little girl I had ever seen.
The nurse placed her on my chest as tears fell from my eyes. I had a little girl of my own. I was a mother. I looked over to see Jackson, smiling at our daughter as his eyes filled with tears.
“She’s absolutely beautiful,” he said as he stroked her hair.
“Yes, she is,” I told him as we both looked at our little girl in awe.
“What did you finally decide to name her?” Amanda asked while cuddling my daughter.
“Chloe Beth,” Jackson said from beside me. We’d had several names picked out but decided to wait on naming her until we saw her.
“That’s beautiful!”
“It is, isn’t it? I just love it!” my mom piped in from the other side of the room.
Landon glanced down at Chloe from beside Amanda. “She’s obviously smart, too. Waiting until her daddy had a break in his schedule. That game last night was awesome!”
“Yeah. I was relieved I was here. I would’ve been devastated if I’d missed it. You don’t know how lucky you are that you don’t have to worry about that.”
“Only eight more weeks,” I told Amanda.
“I’m getting really nervous. I can’t believe our babies will only be two months apart.”
“I know. It’s perfect! Everything is perfect,” I said, looking across the room. I had the husband of my dreams, the perfect daughter, and my best friend and brother were finally together, starting a family of their own. Yes, everything was perfect.
The End
First, a huge thank you to the readers. It’s because of you that I continued this story and I hope you enjoyed it.
I will always need to thank the love of my life, Carlos. Thank you for all of your support and encouragement. I also need to thank my two wonderful sons for letting Mommy write. I love you both so much!
My editor, Tara Entwistle-Clark, thank you! You rock!
A huge thank you to Debra at The Book Enthusiast and Casey at Hardcover Therapy. And all of the blogs that helped spread the word about
Guarded
and
Defensive
.
I can’t say thank you enough to my beta readers Anna Coy, Jennifer Laslie, and Liz Dellinger. You guys helped make this story so much better.
And thank you to all of my friends and family for supporting me each and every day. I love you all.
J.D. Rivera lives in Oklahoma with her husband and two boys. Her life consists of school projects, homework, cartoon shows, and Little League sports. She loves Diet Mountain Dew, the OKC Thunder, costume jewelry, the beach, and reading.
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