Authors: Stacey Lynn
Logan was excitedly surprised in the best way possible when Jack walked through the door of my apartment. I told Penny we’d see her next week after introducing her to Jack and then looked around our small living and dining space, almost embarrassed that Jack was finally seeing my home for the first time.
He paid me well. He could afford it after all, and Logan and I had more than enough money to live comfortably. But we had a small two-bedroom apartment, in a turn of the century apartment building with only fourteen apartments and while it had charm, with the dark wood beams and floors and rounded doorways, it lacked the opulence and wealth of Jack’s home. Our entire apartment could probably fit inside Jack’s living and dining room area.
I looked at Jack, who had immediately been suckered into playing Legos with Logan and cringed. His tall and muscular frame exuded strength and power, even when he was sitting on my living room floor playing with my son. His mere presence almost overpowered the small space.
Logan adored Jack. It made sense. Jack never hesitated to purchase new toys or video games and systems, or books. He blamed it on being an only child and not having any nieces or nephews to spoil and while I appreciated it, and never thought twice of his thoughtfulness before, I did now.
What would I do when this time was done? Would we still be able to work together? If I ended up finding a new job, would Jack still have a presence in Logan’s life?
The questions were too heavy and too daunting to answer in that moment. Jack looked up at me and smiled devilishly.
“Go pack a bag. I’m hungry.”
My eyes widened. “A bag?”
He nodded confidently. “For the night.”
A bag to spend the night? What had gotten into this man? Less than six hours ago he had shown up, practically begging me to yell at him for being an ass, and after two romps – albeit fabulous ones – in the hay for lack of a classier term he was expecting me to spend the night.
Logan’s eyes lit up. “We’re having a sleepover at Mr. Jack’s?” His smile spread from ear to ear and I scowled at Jack before giving Logan my most serious mom look.
“No, sweetie. We’re just going over there for dinner.” I crossed my arms and glared at Jack, expecting him to argue with me. He didn’t.
Instead, he whispered something in Logan’s ear that I couldn’t hear, patted him on the head and started walking toward me. His lopsided smirk increased incrementally with every step. There was no way in hell I was budging on this. Whatever sexual tension was released between the two of us today was going to stay exactly there - between us - and I wasn’t about to let him manipulate me.
“I need to speak to you.” I turned to Logan. “Pick up your toys. We’ll be leaving in a few minutes.”
I spun on my heels practically stomping down the hall to my room thankful Jack followed me. Although I noticed he was still smiling at me. I could practically see the cogs spinning in his head, planning something.
“What do you think you’re doing?” I hissed at him once he closed the door to my room.
He didn’t say anything for a minute. His eyes simply swept over every inch of my room, and stopped on my bed. It felt more intimate, him being here in my private place than it did when I was in his earlier. This was my private area, where I relaxed….and fantasized about the man in front of me.
His eyes moved from my bed, and slowly raked up my body making me feel as if I was still naked. I swallowed, roughly, trying not to let him wear me down even though my body had suddenly warmed from his stare alone.
Once his inspection was complete, Jack’s eyes returned to mine. He simply shrugged. “You’re staying the night.”
I scoffed, “No, I’m not. I agreed to dinner and to talking.”
He took several swift steps towards me, wrapping one arm around my waist and pulled me towards him. I ignored the tightening in my stomach. Good grief, he’d already given me two of the best orgasms of my life and with a simple hip wiggle I was instantly turned on again. I wanted to fight him off though. This certainly wasn’t the time and I definitely didn’t like the idea of being railroaded into making a decision.
With both of my hands on his chest, I pushed him off as hard as I could and took two steps back. “What in the hell is going on with you? Twenty four hours ago you looked at me full of disdain from one simple kiss and today you screw me and think it gives you the right to tell me where I’m sleeping?”
I almost wanted to smack the smirk off his face, almost. It was awfully cute.
“I told you I wanted to talk about whatever was going on between us.”
I nodded and crossed my arms. “Which I agreed to.”
“I do my best talking late at night, and first thing in the morning. In bed.”
I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t stop a smile from breaking out. “That doesn’t sound like talking.”
He crossed his arms and I watched his eyes darken. It was the same lust filled stare he gave me earlier and almost left me melting in a puddle on the floor.
“I told you I feel completely out of control around you. I can’t explain it.”
“Well rein it in,” I said drily and pointed a finger at him. “I’m serious, Jack. I’m not doing this tonight; not with Logan there especially.”
“Fine.” But he didn’t look happy about conceding. He almost looked wounded or hurt but I didn’t want to spend the time thinking about why that could be. “Tomorrow.”
I exhaled slowly and overdramatically letting him know how much his bossiness and assumptions were getting under my skin. “Logan has a sleepover tomorrow night,” I muttered, mostly thinking out loud.
He grinned victoriously. I was frankly shocked he was asking me about the very next night already. That wasn’t his typical MO with women he was with. I lightly grabbed his hand when he offered one out to me and let him pull me back to the living room.
“Are we going to Mr. Jack’s now?” Logan asked when we reached the living room.
I shook my head. “Just for dinner.”
He frowned and I was instantly annoyed that Jack had got my little boys’ hopes up. But I was even more shocked when he answered Logan.
“Another time, little man. We can play Paper Mario tonight, though.” I stumbled over my feet when Jack said it, spoken with such conviction and promise.
I turned to him and whispered harshly, “Stop getting his hopes up.”
His eyes darkened in anger and I wondered what in the world he had to be angry about. I didn’t have time to be dealing with someone, even Jack freaking McMillan, making promises to my kid, only to let him down in the future.
“I’m not.” He spit the words out so forcefully, leaving me knowing that he fully intended to have Logan at his house. And what…with me? How long did he expect this little charade of ours to last?
My confusion from earlier bubbled to the surface all over again. My stomach tightened into a thousand different knots. This was going to be a really bad idea.
Jack’s voice whispered in my ear as Logan went to find his shoes. “I told you to tap that shit down, Emma.”
I couldn’t help it. This could all just be a fun and wild game for him, screwing around with the young housekeeper for who knows how long, but this was my life. It was my career and my family and I had every right to be bothered by how fast everything had happened today.
“I can’t help it,” I said quietly to him. “I don’t know if dinner is a good idea anymore.”
This time there was no denying the wounded expression and even possibly, fear that flashed through his eyes. I shook my head and looked away to Logan who was happily skipping down the hall, shoes in hand, talking to himself about Mario. I couldn’t tell him no.
I turned back to Jack, “Fine. I’ll come tonight.”
“Oh….you’ll come.”
And suddenly, I desperately wanted to.
SIX
Watching Jack lounge in his media room, in his large comfy chairs and playing a video game had to be the absolute highlight of my day. Actually the entire night felt like a fantasy that I rarely bothered dreaming of. I was so young when I got pregnant with Logan that it effectively ruined my dating life for years. Guys in college, law school especially, didn’t want the burden of caring for some other man’s son. Even now it was difficult finding someone worthy enough to be around, knowing eventually it could lead to introducing the new guy to my most important little boy. The sacrifices were well worth it, but most nights, over weeks and years, it was a long and lonely road with very few supporters. Thankfully, I always had Macy, and then eventually Tate, and I guess even Jack to a degree.
Tonight I experienced the semblance of what normal family dinners would be like, talking about our day – at least the parts that were kid appropriate – laughing at Logan’s jokes and antics while he talked about chasing girls around the playground. That had led Jack to give him a very serious discussion over manicotti about the importance of only chasing the girls that were worth it.
I had rolled my eyes. Jack didn’t chase anyone; women fell at his feet everywhere he went. I had witnessed it first-hand. But now, he was mine.
The only question was for how long.
Watching Jack smile, laugh and have the patience of a Saint while teaching Logan how to play his new game only increased my yearning for something more. Something permanent.
I wanted that. I wanted a dad for Logan and a partner for me. Someone to stay up with on the long lonely nights when our child was sick and we could share the duty.
I wanted the hugs and kisses, the hello’s and good-bye’s every morning and after work at night, and I wanted to cook my favorite meals and not leave them behind at my job every day, knowing someone else would be enjoying them.
I sighed, loudly, frustrated at myself for letting my mind wander to the things that would ruin my night. It earned me a scowl from Jack and he instantly paused the game.
“You good with this?” He asked Logan and nodded toward a television larger than any person should possess in their home. It took up an entire wall and while it was great for movie nights, the turtles they were trying to jump on were so big they looked like they could eat us for dinner.
Jack sat his controller down, gave Logan his casual hair waggle, and nodded towards the door.
I met him out in his living room and plunked myself down on one of his incredibly soft chocolate brown sofas, and looked out over Lake Michigan. Jack’s penthouse apartment sat along Lake Shore Drive in the Streeterville area of Chicago, just a few blocks off Michigan Avenue. His breathtaking view faced Lake Michigan. During the day, I would look out the windows and watch the rolling white caps and shipping boats and massive sailboats head out on the water. Tonight, with a lack of lighting, all I could see was blackness.
I sipped the most delicious Cabernet Savignon I had ever tasted and closed my eyes, trying to relax. It didn’t help, though. Regardless of the amazing sex I had earlier, it had also come with too many questions, too many uncertainties and fears I had never anticipated in all my ponderings about what it would be like to actually
have
Jack.
“You’re doing it again,” he admonished me as he sat down on an oversized chair in the corner, facing me.
I stayed looking out the window, too unnerved at the thought of getting swept up in his gorgeous brown eyes.
“Every time you looked at me this week your eyes were filled with regret and disgust over our kiss last week. And that was just a kiss.” I shook my head and took another sip of wine. “I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
“I can’t promise you it won’t.”
I reluctantly dragged my tired eyes to his.
“I just know that I saw you today, and I had to have you.”
Well, he did. A couple of times, and if I was being completely honest, I still wanted more. I also wanted more than sex and I wasn’t sure he could give that to me. In fact, I knew he couldn’t give that to me.
He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and dropped his head into his hands, grabbing fistfuls of his hair before he looked back up to me. “I don’t date.”
I didn’t say anything because I already knew that, and it only increased my resolve that whatever happened earlier in the day was temporary.
“And I don’t get close to anyone, but you got under my skin a long time ago and I’m tired of fighting it.”
Oh my shit. Startled, stunned, shocked, amazed, disbelief….just a few of the emotions that flew across my face at his admission. I clamped my mouth shut so it wouldn’t drop to my knees. My wine glass shook a little bit in my hands. I held it in my lap so I didn’t spill the red wine onto his luxurious sofa that probably cost more than my annual salary.
What was I supposed to say to that?
Apparently nothing, because he slowly stood up and joined me on the couch. Close enough to be intimate, far enough away to have my personal space.
I appreciated it.
I needed the small amount of space to think.
Except my mind went completely blank. Empty. I couldn’t think of a single thing to say while he sat on the couch, both of us staring at each other. I bit the inside of my cheek, wanting to say something; anything, to erase the nervousness I saw flash in his eyes.