Don't Tell (52 page)

Thatcher moved his shoulders in something less than a shrug. „It’s my job.“ He carefully searched Caroline’s face. „I don’t know what to call you. For two weeks you’ve been Mary Grace Winters in my mind.“

Caroline reached up to cover Max’s hand, which had come to rest on her shoulder. „I’m Caroline Stewart. I couldn’t go back to being Mary Grace if I tried.“

Thatcher nodded, his expression very sober. „I suppose not. When you’re ready, I have a few questions for you.“

Caroline regarded him, now equally sober. „I gave my statement to Lieutenant Ross. Rob wanted me to give him Tom. He wanted me to tell everyone he never touched us. That I’d run away because I had another man, that I was unfaithful to him. That I was an unfit mother.“ Max muttered something under his breath and Caroline patted his hand. „He was in my apartment in Chicago when Dana called from the hospital saying Evie had been… attacked.“ She swallowed and pushed the image from her mind. „He wasn’t worried that Evie could identify him. He said he’d used another name and a disguise. He was just perturbed he couldn’t use the same disguise again.“

„He didn’t know we’d found his disguises,“ Thatcher remarked.

„I guess not. We changed cars a couple times. Twice. I didn’t know Sy’s body was in the trunk of the first car.“ She forced her voice to steady. She’d made it through the discourse with Lieutenant Ross without breaking down. But while Ross had been kind, she hadn’t looked at her the same way Thatcher was looking at her now with eyes so kind and compelling that they pushed her close to tears. „He, uh, changed cars again a few hours before dawn. The last one was the white van you confiscated at the cabin. I was tied up in the back when we stopped again. I thought we were-changing cars again when he opened the back door and put Nicky in the back. He never touched him, other than to tie him up. At least not that I saw.“

Thatcher’s eyes closed, his chest heaving in silent relief. When his eyes opened, he’d regained his composure. „Thank you.“

„You’re welcome. He kept forgetting about Nicky as the day passed. He’d remember all of a sudden. Then he’d forget again. I kept wondering how he planned to explain away kidnapping Nicky when he was forcing me to tell everyone he was the perfect husband and father, but by that time I thought Nicky had gotten away and didn’t want to draw Rob’s attention to him. I honestly think he snapped there at the end. He didn’t seem to give any thought or worry to the policeman he shot. I don’t even know if he remembered doing it,“ she finished, leaning against Max, so tired after relating all the details once again.

Thatcher’s jaw clenched. „I hope the jury finds that argument compelling when they sentence him to the death penalty.“

Caroline looked sideways at Tom to see if the notion had any impact on her son. His expression didn’t seem to change. He was still grim. And angry. She supposed he was entitled. She stifled her sigh and turned her attention back to Thatcher. „How is Detective Jolley, really?“

Thatcher looked away. „He might die.“

And he felt guilty. It was clear to see. „Not because of you,“ Caroline said softly.

Thatcher’s handsome face twisted. „I don’t agree. I was trying to save my son. I didn’t care about anything else, anybody else.“ He closed his eyes. „Not even you, Caroline Stewart.“

„So?“ Caroline managed a smile when his eyes flew open, surprise evident on his face, guilt obvious in his eyes. „So you were thinking of your son. So was I seven years ago when I escaped.“ Her smile disappeared as her own thoughts turned inward, to the guilt churning inside her own soul. „I took the coward’s way out then, Agent Thatcher.“

„Caroline – “ Max interrupted.

Caroline shook her head, then closed her eyes against the resulting pain of even the smallest movement. Immediately she opened her eyes, unable to bear the new images that now haunted her mind. „Because I was thinking of myself and my son seven years ago, Rob continued to move freely. How many people are dead because I did nothing? Susan Crenshaw’s baby will grow up without a mother. That police officer, guarding your house. I heard he had little kids.“ A sob choked her voice. „Their father will never come home because I let Rob go. I never…“ She felt the tears running down her cheeks and made no move to wipe them away. Max brushed a tissue across her cheeks, drying them. „I was afraid he’d find me. Hurt me. Dana said it’s not always about me. I wish I’d figured that out before all these people were killed.“

Thatcher made a sound in his throat. „I wish I’d been able to see the future. Toni Ross wishes she’d been able to see what an evil man he was. Ben Jolley wishes he’d helped you years ago when he suspected you were getting the living tar beaten out of you. Gabe Farrell wishes he’d pushed harder to find evidence against Winters years ago. Bottom line is, you couldn’t have known. You couldn’t have known he’d do these things. And you did try. You tried to tell the world when you took out that restraining order. Don’t blame yourself now.“

She stared at him, desperately wishing she could take his words to heart. „Part of me knows you’re right, but I can’t seem to stop thinking about all the lives Rob ruined. My friend, Sy Adelman, is dead because he cared about me. And my friend Evie…“ Caroline’s voice broke again as devastating emotion surged. „She might never wake up.“

„She’s awake, Caroline.“ David appeared in the doorway and eased his way past a console of blinking lights to stand next to Thatcher.

Caroline sagged back against Max. „Thank God.“

David nodded. „Amen. I just talked to Dana. It took me over an hour to get to the right extension. Dana was sleeping in the visitors’ waiting room when they found her. I told her you were safe.“ David reached down and touched the tip of Caroline’s toe through the sheet. „She couldn’t talk for a few minutes, Caroline. She was crying too hard. She wanted me to tell you she was sorry for the things she said. She was afraid you’d die with words between you.“

Caroline closed her eyes, remembering the pain of Dana’s words. The greater pain of realizing her best friend had been so right after all. „She shouldn’t apologize,“ she said, her voice husky. „She was right as usual. But how is Evie?“

„Dana said Evie woke up about three hours ago. Her vital signs are good, although she’ll have to undergo additional surgeries. They don’t yet know the extent of her injuries, or how long she’ll be in the hospital. She…“ David sighed. „She can’t remember anything about the attack.“

„That’s probably for the best,“ Max murmured. „She’ll remember when she’s able. We’ll be there for her when she does.“

Tom abruptly rose from his chair and leaned over to squeeze Caroline’s hand. „Mom, will you be okay if I leave for a little while?“

She turned as far as her neck permitted, seeing half his face from the comer of her eye. „Sure, honey. David, will you get Tom something to eat?“

Tom shook his head. „David, I’ll meet you in the cafeteria in ten minutes. I need to talk to Agent Thatcher first. Do you have a few minutes, sir?“

Caroline watched Thatcher thoughtfully consider her son. „Sure, Tom. Let’s go.“

Steven followed as the boy he’d pictured as Robbie Winters walked purposefully to the end of the hall. At fourteen Tom Stewart was as tall as he was. Give the boy a few years and he’d fill out to be every bit as big as his father. Steven’s jaw clenched at the thought of Rob Winters, currently in the operating room next to Ben Jolley, ironically enough. Ben was having Winters’s bullet removed from his abdominal cavity while Winters was having fragments of his shattered skull removed from his brain. Caroline Stewart crushed Winters’s skull and cheekbones with Hunter’s cane. A grim sense of satisfaction filled him and he made not the slightest effort to push it away.

Tom stopped next to a window and stared out. Steven waited, suspecting what the boy had on his mind. Tom’s jaw hardened as he frowned out the window. „Where is he now?“

„Your father?“

Tom’s fists clenched at his sides. „He’s not my father. Where is he?“

Steven hesitated. „Right now he’s in surgery. I don’t mink it’s a good idea for you to see him.“

„I don’t want to. Will you put him in jail?“

Steven nodded slowly. „Pending his preliminary hearings, yes.“

A minute went by and Steven waited.

„Will you keep his identity secret?“ Tom finally demanded. Softly. Too softly.

Steven considered for only a moment. „No.“

„He won’t even make it to trial, will he, sir?“ Tom’s voice was deceptively mild and completely at odds with the stiff set of his shoulders.

Steven found himself becoming defensive at the boy’s intimation. Mostly because the same thought had been rolling around his own mind ever since Jonathan Lambert slapped the cuffs on Winters, unconscious and bleeding. „It’s the responsibility of the police to protect every prisoner in custody, regardless of who he is or what he’s done.“

„That’s not what I asked, sir.“

Steven stared long and hard at Tom’s rigid back, then shook his head. If anyone was entitled to the truth it was this young man and his mother. „Once the prison population finds out he beat that boy to death two weeks ago? Probably not.“

Tom visibly relaxed. „Good.“ He turned to meet Steven’s eyes and Steven was struck by the cold maturity he saw there. „I hope Detective Jolley recovers, sir, and that your little boy doesn’t have too many problems coming out of everything that happened today. And if he comes to trial, we’ll come back to testify.“ He offered his hand.

„Thank you, Tom.“ Steven shook the boy’s hand as if he were an adult. „I wish you and your mother a full recovery as well.“

Tom stared him straight in the eye. „I accept your wishes for my mother. I’m fine.“

Steven watched as Tom walked towards the cafeteria, a distinct spring in the young man’s step, and felt the cloak of sadness envelop, swift and complete. „No, you’re not fine, son,“ he murmured. „You’re definitely not fine. None of us will be fine for a good long time.“

With a sigh, Steven turned for the surgical waiting room, needing to check on Ben Jolley one last time before taking his son home. Jolley had sought absolution for his part in aiding Rob Winters’s sins by making himself into a human shield. Nicky was safe. Steven hoped Ben Jolley would live to find the absolution he desired.

They’d moved Caroline to a regular hospital room where they would keep her for observation for another day. The nurse made sure she was comfortable, offered to find a cane in the hospital supply room for Max, then took her leave.

They were alone for the first time since… yesterday morning, Max realized, stunned. His whole world had been utterly changed in the space of thirty-six hours. He was unsure of what to say. Which words were the right ones.

He was sitting on the edge of the hospital bed, holding her hand. Caroline was leaning back against the pillows, resting, her eyes closed, her chest rising and falling with each quiet breath she drew. Each breath was one he hadn’t been certain he’d ever see her take again just a few hours before. Her face was still bruised, but the swelling on her jaw and lips was diminished. He wasn’t sure which words were the right ones, so he used the ones least likely to be the wrong ones. „I love you, Caroline,“ he whispered, not sure if she was awake or not.

Her lips curved and her eyes opened, still the same incredible blue he’d found unforgettable the first moment they met. „I love you, too.“

He hesitated. „Can we talk now?“

Her gaze dropped to the bedsheet, then rose back up to meet his. „Yes.“ She was nervous. It nearly broke his heart.

„Caroline, I…“ He found the words simply wouldn’t come and he looked away, hoping for divine inspiration.

„I’m sorry, Max.“ Caroline said quietly, going very still.

He turned his head back so quickly it throbbed. He ignored the pain. There was something in her tone that frightened him. „Why?“

„I’m sorry I hurt you.“ She leaned back against the pillows and closed her eyes. He watched her swallow and lick her lips. „I know I hurt you when I said no to your marriage proposal. Dana told me I’d be lucky if you still wanted me when I came to my senses.“ She swallowed again. „I know you love me. I know you raced down here to rescue me. But now that the smoke’s cleared I understand you might still be angry with me. I want you to know that I figured out when I got back to my apartment that I’d pushed you away because I was afraid and I hated myself for that. I wish I’d had one more day… one more hour to call you and tell you I’d marry you. That I was sorry and stupid. That I’d truly left my old life in the past and I was unconditionally yours. Now…“ She sighed, her eyes still closed. „Now I’ll divorce Rob, publicly. Everyone in Chicago will know who I was. Everyone here in Asheville will know who I now am.“ She opened her eyes and Max felt his heart clench at the misery he saw there. „But you’ll never know for sure what I would have done. Every time you look at me, you’ll wonder if I would have chosen you over my stupid fear.“

Max swallowed the enormous lump of emotion back down his throat. That she should be worrying about that after all she’d been through. „I realized right after you left that I’d been too hasty. I was wrong, Caroline.“ He increased the pressure on her hands, still careful to keep his touch gentle. „I wasn’t wrong to want a life with you, a legal married life with legal children. But I was wrong to force you to choose when you were so afraid.“ He dropped one hand and lightly caressed the side of her jaw that wasn’t hurt. „You had every right to be terrified of him, Caroline. I wasn’t thinking about what you’d been through, only how much I was hurting at that moment. I decided to step back and work through all the ways we could solve the problem and give us both what we needed.“ He picked up her hand, desperately needing to touch her. „I told my family.“

Her eyes widened. „You did?“

„Yes. They wanted to help. They all said they’d do whatever needed to be done to make it so you’d never need to be afraid again. Peter had a lawyer you could trust.“

Her eyes filled and she blinked, sending fat tears sliding down her cheeks. „Who?“

Max smiled, remembering the warmth of his family, the moment he would never forget. „Himself.“ The lump rose in his throat again when he remembered his mother and her words. „Ma said I should go get you from your apartment, that you were welcome in her family.“ He felt his own cheeks become wet and he choked back the emotion once more. „That you were welcome to her son.“