Authors: Ryan Schneider
“
Tuesday? That was the day after our shuttle crash. The day Barney killed himself. You and I went flying that night after the cops left my office.”
Danny didn
’t know what to say. The feelings of guilt were growing. The reason he had refused Harley’s physical advances was the same reason he never should have taken her flying. It now seemed a rather obvious mistake. He didn’t know what to say. So he didn’t say anything.
But Candy stood waiting. Soothing sounds of percolation emanated from the coffee maker.
“I went with a friend of a friend,” Danny said at last. “It was a date, actually. I think.”
“
Ooh, a hot date to Catalina. I suspected you were quite the ladies’ man, doctor. Who’s the lucky girl?”
The gears of Danny
’s mind whirred so loudly he thought surely even Candy could hear them. He had not been expecting Candy’s mild, non-threatened, and non-judgmental reaction. “Her name’s Harley.”
“
Harley?” Candy went to her coffee table and grabbed her large tablet computer. She thumbed through the index of magazines until she found the issue she was looking for and handed the tablet to Danny. “Is that her?”
On the cover was Harley, wearing a short black skirt and heels, and showing a lot of leg. A lot of leg. And a lot of cleavage, too. She looked
sexy but also very intellectual behind black horn-rimmed eyeglasses. In her palm she held the bodiless head of a robot. Bright red letters said, “The New Face of Robotics.”
“
Yep, that’s her.”
“
They put out the issue after she officially joined her grandfather’s company.”
“
Do you know her?”
“
I know of her. I’ve never met her. I don’t think we see eye to eye on much when it comes to robotics. She favors a more restrictive approach, wants to make robots more mindless, with less ability to think for themselves. Wants them all slaved to a more powerful cloud computer which simply issues commands and runs diagnostics, rather than individual, sovereign robots who aren’t beholden to a corporation. Her corporation.”
“
Interesting.”
“
What’s she like?”
“
She’s nice enough. Smart. Likes to drink beer and watch football. Rides a motorcycle.” Danny skipped over the part with all the drinking during the Niner game. He couldn’t remember it anyway.
“
She has a reputation for playing the field,” said Candy.
Harley had indeed been ready to get physical soon after she
’d arrived at Santa Monica Airport. If Danny had suggested it, Harley probably would’ve been willing to skip the flight altogether and go have sex in the hangar.
“Did you guys–”
“No.”
“
You don’t know what I’m going to ask you.”
“
Oh. Sorry.”
“
I was going to ask if you guys went to The Blue Bar.”
“
Oh. Yes, we did.”
“
What did you think I was going to ask you?”
“
If we . . .” Danny couldn’t immediately think of a polite euphemism for sex, if such a euphemism even existed.
“
Did it?” Candy asked.
“
Yeah.”
“
Like minks?”
“
Yeah. I mean no.”
“
You guys didn’t do it?”
“
No.”
“
You can tell me if you did. You and I had only been on, like, one-and-a-half dates. And we nearly died in that shuttle crash.”
“
What does the shuttle crash have to do with it?”
“I dunno. People do k
ooky stuff after a near-death experience. Once they realize how close they came to dying and to no longer having the opportunity to do all the things they’d always planned on doing, sometimes they go a little crazy. They go out and start doing some of those things. Like skydiving or bungee jumping. Or sleeping with billionaire roboticist heiresses.” Candy grabbed the tablet from Danny and studied the image of Harley. “With really nice legs. And really nice boobs. Bitch. I wonder where she gets her hair done.”
Danny went to Candy, took the
tablet from her hands and placed it on the counter, face down. He slid his arms around Candy’s waist.
“
No. She and I didn’t do it. And certainly not like minks. Truthfully, I’m dreading her calling me again. And I’m thankful that she hasn’t. I wish I had never taken her up in the first place. I should’ve canceled. Howard and I almost died following those damn Navy pilots. Howard did all the flying, by the way. Man, can he fly.”
“
How come you didn’t tell me any of this?”
“
I wanted to forget about it. It wasn’t important. I just wanted to get home so I could call you.”
Candy kissed Danny
’s lips.
Then she poured coffee into the mugs.
“I’ve only ever taken the ferry out to Catalina.” She spooned Stevia powder into each mug, stirred, and added a splash of milk. “It departs out of Marina del Rey.”
“
That sounds fun.”
Candy handed a mug to Danny.
“How did you meet Harley, anyway?”
“
At the pub. Rory invited me to watch the game and after you and I had almost died in the shuttle crash–”
“
Rory?”
“
Yeah.”
“
Rory Calhoun?”
“
Yeah. You know Rory?”
“Yeah, I know Rory.
We went to school together. I think he has a thing for me.”
“
So you’re the one.”
“
I’m the one what?”
“
At lunch on Tuesday, Rory told me he’s got the hots for some chick but he wouldn’t say who. We got to talking after I showed him your panties–”
“You showed him my panties?”
“Oh, uh . . . I’m sorry.”
“
Those were just for you.”
“
I know. Thank you, by the way. It may be the single sexiest, most endearing thing anyone has ever done for me. Don’t worry, I didn’t let Rory touch them. Or smell them.”
“
He wanted to smell them?”
“
He wanted to
buy
them.”
“
But you didn’t let him.”
“
No.”
“
Good.”
“
So, Rory’s got a thing for you?”
“
He hit on me the night you and I had our first date. He and Tim were waiting for me inside my house after you left.”
“
Tim was there, too?”
“
Yeah, you know Tim?”
“
A little. I’ve met him a few times. Wait a second, Rory and Tim were in your house? How’d they get in?”
“
Tim found my spare key hidden in the gnome. I took the gnome inside after I kicked them out. After Rory asked me out to dinner.”
“
Fascinating. Rory has a thing for you. Harley has a thing for me. But Harley and Rory are fooling around.”
“
Harley and Rory are fooling around?” Candy looked surprised.
“
I think so. That’s the impression I got at the pub. We were all doing shots but she seemed to have no compunction about touching him. If you know what I mean.”
“
Makes sense. She and Rory and Tim all work together.” Candy laughed.
“
What’s so funny?”
“
It’s funny that you know Rory and Tim, and I know Rory and Tim, but you and I never met. We met on the Internet, two complete strangers, but it turns out that we have friends in common but never realized it until now. Small world.”
“
That reminds me, Tim is having his annual–”
“
Fireworks extravaganza,” Danny and Candy said in unison.
“
And I was hoping you would be my date,” Danny concluded.
“
I’d love to be your date. You think Rory and Tim and Harley will all be there?”
“
Tim will be, since it’s his party and his house. I’m sure Rory will be there, too. Don’t know about Harley. Tim wants us to be there Tuesday night and Wednesday night, then head home Thursday morning. So we should pack an overnight bag.”
“
What if it’s weird and awkward and uncomfortable? What if Rory keeps hitting on me? What if he corners me in an upstairs bathroom and professes his love to me and tries to give me his underwear?”
“
Any time you want to leave, just say the magic word.”
“
What’s the magic word?”
“
It’s usually ‘please’ but I don’t think that will work in this situation. What should the magic word be?”
“
Molasses.”
“
Molasses?”
“
What’s wrong with molasses?”
“
Nothing’s wrong with it. But how are we going to find a reason to use it in context if one of us decides it’s time to split?”
“
We’ll think of something.” Candy sipped her coffee. “Do Rory and Tim know that you and I know that we all know each other?”
“
I don’t know. But they’re not stupid. If not, it’s only a matter of time until they realize it.”
“
Let’s pretend we don’t know that we all know each other. It’ll be fun. Plus I can get Rory back for breaking into my house. Is it still Breaking-and-Entering if they used a key?”
“
I dunno.”
“
I should call the police chief and find out. Too bad Barney’s gone; he would know. Which reminds me, I need to get downstairs. You want to come down or stay here?”
“
I’ll come.”
Candy took a big drink of coffee.
“I’m so ready for a nap.”
“
Didn’t you sleep well last night?”
“
I slept great. Once we went to sleep. But I think that was around four. My lips and tongue are sore from all the kissing.”
Danny grinned.
“Was that your first time in zero G?”
“
Yes.”
“
Mine, too.”
They smiled.
~
Danny sat in the chair opposite Candy, just as he had during the session with Helen and Sparky.
On the sofa sat two robots.
The first
’bot was larger than the second and distinctly male. It possessed broad shoulders and long, substantial limbs. Its exterior was a matte black, giving it the look of some sort of service ’bot capable of heavy lifting and strenuous labor. All robots were strong, but this model was clearly purpose-built. Danny was not certain what that purpose was. But he would certainly never want to face such a robot in a physical altercation. Not that he could recall more than a handful of instances throughout history in which a robot had harmed a human; other than a robocop or a military robot designed, built, and programmed to do so.
The second robot was smaller,
and distinctly female in appearance. She sat with her knees close together, legs crossed at the ankles. In studying her, Danny noted his use of a female pronoun. It was amazing how sex and gender identities tended to exert themselves, even among robots. This smaller, female ’bot had an ivory-colored exterior and when she moved she sparkled with a faint and lovely iridescence.
Of particular interest was that the robots sat side by side on the sofa. The left hand of the male robot held fast to the rig
ht hand of the female robot, with the sense-pads of their gray fingers intertwined.
Candy
sat in her chair, legs crossed, perusing the case notes on her digital clipboard.
Danny couldn
’t stop staring at Candy’s sexy black shoe and the flesh of her ankle visible at the hem of the long, tight blue skirt she put on before they left her home fifteen minutes earlier.
The two robots waited in silence.
Danny had never been one to be prone to boredom. Even during periods of inactivity or waiting, there were always things to think about. What to do about Harley, for example. What an odd bird. She seemed nice enough, appeared to have a decent sense of humor. And she was beautiful and sexy, of course. But she also had an intensity Danny found a bit tiring. And the overt nature of her sexuality came across as a bit forced at times. Danny suspected Harley had long ago been conditioned to interact with the world using the language of her body, just as millions and millions of other women had done. Big, strong men learned to navigate the world through strength. People of noteworthy intelligence managed via their mind and intellect. Whatever attribute or strength one possessed became the means for survival. It was no different in the animal kingdom, so why should it not be thus for mankind?