Graceful Ashes (25 page)

“You too.” I continued to laugh as I closed the door.

“I’ve got food!” I held the bags up as I walked to the kitchen where Tegan was still standing and placed them on the counter.

“You really need to tell him.”

Tegan was back on that lovely little topic it seemed.

“I plan to…”

“You need to tell who, what?”

Talon’s voice startled both of us. Tegan yelped and I jumped, almost tossing the food onto the floor in the process.

“Way to scare the shit out of us!” I huffed.

“Language,” Talon and Tegan said in unison.

“Sorry, I’m not used to little ones being around.”

I took Madalyn from Talon’s arms. I loved the smell of a freshly cleaned baby. But that wasn’t the only reason I snatched her from him, I was hoping to change the subject he was nosing around.

“You love Aunt Zoey, don’t ya, Madalyn?” I used my best baby talk as I placed a round of kisses on her chubby cheeks.

Madalyn erupted with laughter as I continued to place kisses across her face and down her neck.

“Staph Aunt Zoey, staph!” Madalyn smacked my head with her small hand.

“For the love of God, please don’t make her crap her freshly changed pants,” Talon said.

“Apparently something didn’t sit well on her stomach,” Tegan added.

“To say the least.” Talon groaned as he filled his and Tegan’s plates with Chinese take out.

“Nothing like talking about poop before we eat, huh, Madalyn?”

She giggled some more.

“You all eat; I’ll keep an eye on her for a bit.” I sat Madalyn down and she instantly took off in the direction of her bag of toys that were sitting by the front door.

Watching her was easier than it had been the last time I’d been around her. Being hundreds of miles away from them made me miss the milestones of her life, which made me sad, but at least I’d been able to spend time with her more than a couple times a year.

I took a seat on the floor beside Madalyn and watched Talon bring his and Tegan’s plates from the kitchen. The two of them were still head-over-heels in love—like a new couple, who hadn’t learned one another’s faults. Their love made me hope and pray that what I was experiencing with Hendrix would grow to be something similar. That type of love was hard to find…if not rare.

Tegan winked at me when she caught me watching them. I smiled and turned my attention to Madalyn who was talking adamantly to her doll.

“What’s her name?” I asked in an attempt to be a part of her conversation.

“Mia.” Madalyn held out the doll. “Says hi.”

“Well, hello, Mia.” I took the plush hand of the doll and gave it a gentle shake.

“Mia likes you.” Madalyn smiled widely.

“I like Mia too.”

Madalyn crawled into my lap with her doll in tow. She laid her head against my chest and hugged Mia tightly against her own chest. A few quiet moments passed before I realized she had fallen asleep. The flights and layover had worn her little butt out.

“I made you a plate.” Tegan held a heaping plate. She smiled when her eyes landed on Madalyn.

“She’s out.”

“Yeah, she is.” Tegan chuckled and set my plate back on the counter. “It’s past her bedtime. I’ll go put her down.”

“It’s fine, I can take her back there since I’m already holding her.”

“You sure?”

“Positive. Now go.” I tilted my head in the direction of the kitchen.

I slowly rose to my feet, maneuvering Madalyn so I was cradling her in my arms and carried her to the spare bedroom. I’d purchased a used crib when I moved back to New York so she would have somewhere to sleep when they visited, and so Tegan and Talon wouldn’t have to haul something for her.

As I placed her in the crib she rustled a bit before her mouth went slack and her grip loosened on her doll. Madalyn was an unexpected blessing to our family, and was lucky enough to have two of the best people I knew as her parents.

I leaned over the railing and gently kissed her forehead. “Sweet dreams, beautiful girl.”

When I returned to living room, Talon and Tegan had setup shop on the couch and were enjoying the takeout.

“This has to be the best Chinese I have ever eaten.” Talon said through a mouth full of food.

“I only order the best.”

“Your plate’s in the microwave. Didn’t want it to get cold.”

“Thank you, Tegan.”

I retrieved my food from the microwave and joined them on the couch. We talked about their trip here and what they wanted to do while they were in New York. Even though they’d visited on numerous occasions, they hadn’t had the chance to do a whole lot of sightseeing. Exploring the city was the number one thing someone had to do when they’re in The Big Apple. But the funny thing was I hadn’t done much sightseeing myself.

“How’s New York treating you this time around?”

Talon’s question caused me to choke on my gulp of water. I coughed repeatedly as I patted my chest. “Umm…it’s been good.”

“You okay?” he asked.

“Fine. Water just went down the wrong pipe is all.” I coughed again before I finally gathered my composure.

Talon gave me a confused look while Tegan looked like a deer in headlights. She knew exactly why I’d choked on my water, but wasn’t speaking up, which surprised me. She wasn’t one to keep secrets from Talon, even if they involved me.

“I can’t wait to see another performance of your show.” Tegan changed the subject.

“There’s only a few left before we take a break and auditions begin for the next production. Fingers crossed I get a more pronounced role next time around.”

“You’re dancing on Broadway! A more pronounced role can’t make that fact any better.” Talon added.

“The hell it can’t.” I scoffed.

Tegan laughed. “He doesn’t understand that dreams only get bigger.”

“Yes I do.” He narrowed his eyes.

“Really? Because last time I checked you said all of your dreams had come true. You have a family that you love, a home to keep them safe, and a beautiful wife.” Tegan winked.

“You might’ve changed a few of those words from what I actually said.”

“Hey now,” she said and we all broke into laughter.

“You guys make me insanely jealous.”

“Why?” Talon asked as Tegan fell silent.

“Because…” I sighed. “Love like the two of you have is hard to find.”

“Your time will come, Zoey. And whoever it is will be one lucky bastard.”

“I love you too, Talon.”

He pulled me into a side hug.

“Ever since you were a tiny little girl who ran around the house wearing her princess crown, I’ve only wanted the best for you, Zoey. I’ve wanted you to find your passion and turn it into a career, which you’ve seemed to have accomplished. And I’ve wanted you to find someone who makes you unbelievably happy to the point of not wanting to be with anyone else, that you see your entire future with that person. I’ve been lucky enough to find my person.” He smiled at Tegan and gave her leg a gentle squeeze.”

I hoped Talon truly meant that because my heart and soul was telling me that Hendrix was my person. I said a silent prayer that their meeting would go smoothly and excused myself from the couch to clean up and hit the bed. My mind and nerves had worn me plum out.

Chapter Twenty Four
–
Hendrix

Zoey had been tripping out all week knowing that I wanted to speak with Talon face-to-face rather than over the phone. What perfect timing for them to be coming in. I kept reassuring her that everything would be fine, that he would see that I’ve changed and how I loved his sister with my entire being. Convincing her wasn’t going as smoothly as I’d hoped, probably because I was having almost as hard of a time convincing myself. Talon was an intimidating man especially when it came to Zoey. He’d been her protector for her entire life. He raised her from a very young age after they lost their parents and baby brother, so their bond was more than your average brother and sister bond. He was Zoey’s father figure, the man in her life who’d helped her grow into the amazing woman that she’d become. The woman I hoped to spend the rest of my life with.

I texted Zoey asking her to let me know when they were on their way so I could close up the studio. I wanted Talon and Tegan to see the place without the distraction of patrons, to see the steps I’d made to better myself, and not simply tell them. Proof helped people realize that someone could honestly turn their life around.

The day I lost Zoey, I’d been angry. Even more angry that she’d made it impossible to find or contact her. But as my anger faded, I realized that the only chance of getting her back was if I got my shit together. To live the life my parents had always hoped for me to live. It was a long and hard road, but those two years molded me into the man I’d become. The man I could face in the mirror. An accomplished man, not the dirty and worthless one.

My phone dinged and I read Zoey’s reply. They were on their way. She hadn’t told Talon that I owned the studio, or that I was going to be where they’re going. She thought it was best to keep that information from him, knowing he probably wouldn’t agree to come if he knew. I had thirty minutes to close the studio down and get my game plan lined out. I’d been thinking about what to say since Zoey had come back into my life, hoping that we’d end up to be more than a couple nights of bliss. Since I’d been granted that, I needed to make sure Talon would be okay with me being with his sister, because the last thing I wanted to do was stand between them. They’d lost the rest of their family much like I had mine, so dividing them wouldn’t be an option. No matter how hard it would be to walk away from her a second time, I’d have to do that if he didn’t approve.

God, I hoped he approved.

After I sent Lacey home, I flipped the sign to closed and locked the front door. Zoey knew the code to the back and had a key to get in so I took a seat in the lounge area with a glass of water and went over my game plan as I awaited their arrival.

My nerves were on the fritz and sitting around to pass the time had them stretched to snapping. The canvas of the Phoenix was hanging directly in my line of vision. I sat back against the plush cushion of the couch and took it in. I’d created the piece not long after I’d come to terms that Zoey was gone for good and there was nothing I could do about it. Creating the Phoenix had been my way of trying to cope with her moving on with her life and what I’d hoped would be her rising from the ashes I’d created of her Juilliard dream into something better than she could’ve imagined.

The sound of the door unlocking pulled my attention from the Phoenix. I let out a slow breath as I heard the chatter of them talking, but I couldn’t make out what was being said.

“Do you work here or something?” Talon asked.

“I know the owner,” Zoey replied.

The shake in her voice was evident; he had to know something was going on.

She’d told me that Tegan knew about us, but she hadn’t said how the conversation went. Which made me think Tegan’s response hadn’t been what Zoey had hoped for. As their voices became louder, Zoey came into view. She stopped just inside the studio and turned to face them. They couldn’t see me from where they were in the entryway, but that wouldn’t last long. I took a deep lung burning breath and headed toward Zoey.

It was now or never.

“I have something to tell you.”

A pang of heartache hit me at hearing how much Zoey’s voice shook at her nervousness over telling her brother about us. I hated that for her. I hated that I was the reason she was feeling the way she was. No relationship should put that much strain on a family.

“Zoey…what’s going on?”

The authority in Talon’s voice made its presence known and I had to intervene before Zoey closed in on herself.

When I reached Zoey, I placed my hand on her lower back in reassurance, then moved into their line of sight and smiled widely. “Come on in.” I moved Zoey and myself aside, giving them room to pass. Tegan smiled nervously at me as she passed with who I assumed to be Madalyn in her arms.

“Talon narrowed his eyes as he took me in. “I know you…”

I didn’t look the same as I had when he’d come to take Zoey back to Chicago. I’d gained muscle, cut my hair, and changed the way I dressed. I was no longer a riffraff boy, I was a man.

“We’re leaving,” he said.

Obviously, just exactly who I was had hit him

He reached for Zoey’s hand.

She stepped back and spoke before I could.

“If you want to leave, Talon, go right ahead. But I was really hoping this would go over differently than it looks like it’s going to.”

“You’re kidding me, right?” Talon’s eyebrows flattened. “You don’t tell me that you’re hanging around the same guy who ruined your first shot at a career. Then you think it’s a great idea to bring me and the rest of our family to an art studio to learn this bit of information.”

“I already knew,” Tegan said.

“You what?” Talon’s jaw dropped.

“The night we arrived Zoey told me.”

“Why wouldn’t you tell me about this, Tegan?”

“Probably because I knew how you’d react. Zoey loves him.” Tegan’s eyes cut to me. “And I hope to God he loves her just as much.”

“I do.” I stood a little taller.

Talon scoffed. “Did you love her when you drug her into a world that my little sister didn’t need to be in? Huh?”

Talon stepped closer to me as his anger seethed. He had every right to be pissed off. I’d told Zoey from the get go that we needed to tell them, to make it known that we were together and I wasn’t the same person as I was back then.

“He’s changed, Talon!” Zoey cried out as tears streamed down her face.

“Baby,” I pulled her into my chest, “please don’t cry. I don’t want you to cry.” I ran my hand down her smooth hair.

“Zoey…”

Talon’s voice morphed back to his normal loving tone when it came to her.

Zoey stepped from my arms and wiped her tears but wouldn’t look at me. She turned to Talon and heavily sighed. “This is Hendrix’s studio.”

“It’s beautiful.” Tegan replied even though Zoey wasn’t talking directly to her.

I turned to find Tegan standing before the Phoenix. “Thank you,” I said.

She turned to face me and smiled as Madalyn reached forward to touch the canvas. “You can’t touch, Madalyn.” She covered Madalyn’s hand with her own.

“It’s fine,” I replied.

“You say that now but she’ll break it.” Tegan laughed.

“What the hell’s going on here?” Talon said.

I turned my attention back to him and took a deep breath. “Could you give us a minute?” I softly asked Zoey. Her eyes begged me not to make her leave because she was afraid as to what would happen if she did. I leaned forward and kissed her forehead to let her know everything would be okay.

She nodded then walked off in the direction of Tegan and Madalyn.

I waited a few seconds for them to move further into the studio before I asked Talon to take a seat. To my surprise he agreed and took a seat directly across from me on the opposite couch.

“I know you don’t approve of our past.”

“You’re damn straight.”

A humorless laugh escaped me. “I deserve your anger and your hate. But your sister doesn’t deserve it.”

“Who the hell do you think you are telling me how to treat my sister? I’ve raised her, loved her unconditionally my entire life and I still do.” His eyes narrowed.

I held up a hand. “I apologize. I shouldn’t have come at you like that.”

Talon nodded. “Why should I even think about giving you the benefit of the doubt with Zoey again?”

“I love her.”

“Do you?” He crossed his arms over his chest.

“Yes,” I instantly replied. “I loved her back then, but I was too stupid to realize that I couldn’t give her the life she deserved if I couldn’t even take care of myself. I was selfish; I’ll be the first to admit that. I shouldn’t have pursued her after our first encounter but there was a radiance to her that I couldn’t ignore.”

Talon chuckled. “That’s always been Zoey. She’s unlike anyone else.”

“Did I majorly fuck up back then? Hell yes I did and I lived each day until I saw her again regretting the person I had become after I lost my parents in 9/11.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

Talon’s tense state softened.

“I appreciate that.” I cleared my throat. “Would I go back and change how I screwed up Zoey’s chance at Juilliard? As badly as I want to say I would change it all, I can’t.”

Talon’s face hardened.

“Let me finish.” I shifted forward on the couch. “Without that heartbreak of losing her and ruining her future I would’ve never gotten my shit together. She’s the reason I opened this studio. She’s the reason I started taking better care of myself and pushed the drugs away. She’s the reason I visit my parents’ graves again. Zoey’s been the one bright light in my life even without her psychically being here, and I will do whatever I have to do to prove to you that I am completely in love with her. There isn’t anything in this world that would cause me to throw away a second chance with her, I can promise you that.”

Talon sat back on the couch and stretched his arm across the back of the cushions. “How long have you been clean?”

“A year and a half.”

“Is this studio your only source of income?”

“Yes. I do pretty well too.”

He nodded.

“If she had to move clear across the United States to further her career, what would you do?”

“I’d break my lease on this studio and open a new one wherever she went. I’m not losing her again. I mean it.”

“As much as I want to hate you for the past, I know Zoey played a part in her choices. And she learned from them. As long as you’re not going to wreck her life again, I’m willing to give you the chance to redeem yourself. The fact that Tegan didn’t tell me lets me know that she’s willing to do the same. It’s the only reason she would keep something to do with Zoey a secret from me.”

“You don’t know how much that means to me.”

Talon stood from the couch and extended his hand.

I followed suit and slipped my hand into his and gave it a firm shake.

Talon released my hand, and leaned into my space. “If you ruin her life I’ll make sure you lose everything that means anything to you.”

I wasn’t one to cower at a threat, but I knew Talon would make good on his if I hurt Zoey again. But I had absolutely no intention of doing that. She was my life, and would continue to be as long as I had air in my lungs.

“I understand,” I said, not backing away from him.

He clasped me on the shoulder. “Good. Now, let’s see what our girls are up to.”