Hidden Barriers (7 page)

I thought for sure when Josh said tonight’s meeting was a
date
I was going to pass out. All the color had to have drained from my face. I’m glad I had several layers on because he never saw my body trembling from the turmoil inside me.

As I sit on the park bench, I watch him take off running back the way he came with Aspen in tow. No sooner is Josh out of sight do all the girls come rushing over to get the scoop on him. I am bombarded with about a million questions, and Lucy is saying if I don’t want him, she’ll gladly take him for a spin.

I explain everything from the night at the emergency room. Kim thinks it’s fate that I was
there, and the fact that I ran into him again a second time confirms her speculation. I am skeptical about meeting him at all. Josh is hot. There is no doubt about that, but there are so many thoughts spiraling out of control in my head.

Rose sits next to me on the bench and holds my quivering hand before she looks me in the eyes and says, “He’s not Stone.” I know he isn’t Stone, but the idea of opening up again to a guy is such a foreign thing now. She continues to hold my hand, saying, “Sam, he seems like a good guy, and he’s a cop. If anything, he’ll protect you.”

Protect me.
Do I want someone to protect me? Something tells me I’m stronger than that. I have to be. I need to fight my internal battles that wage a war with my emotions. I have to finally heal after all these years and move forward, regardless if that threat is still out there.

Now, sitting here days later, getting ready in my bedroom for my night with Josh, I feel calm as I live in the moment. I refuse to allow my past to have any effect on my future. I have to; I can’t be scared all my life.

While I apply my mascara, my foot taps against the floor as I keep my nerves in check, listening to the song pumping through the speakers. I see my phone light up on the vanity next to me. After reading the name on the screen, I turn down the volume and turn on the speakerphone.

“Hi, Mom!”

“Hey, sweetie. Just calling to say hello and see how everything is going? Are you healing all right?”

“Things are good. My shoulder is better, and I won’t need the sling much longer. I should be back out on the track really soon.” Shit. Here it comes.

“Sam, you know your father and I worry about the stuff you girls do in the derby. Are you sure that’s a good idea to continue after what happened in practice?”

My mom and dad support me, but after they came up to my first bout two years ago and saw me fly headfirst into the crowd, well, they haven’t been back since. Needless to say, they have seen their only daughter hurt enough already. I try to avoid talking about the derby injuries with them as much as possible, but Drew tends to have a loose mouth and word gets to them anyway.

Sighing as I continue to apply the rest of my makeup, I reply, “Mom, you don’t have to worry. I’m good. Everything is good.”

“Are you working tonight?” she asks, even though she has known my schedule for years.

“Yeah, I’m heading over there in a little bit.”

“How’s the new assistant manager working out?” She’s always inquisitive and trying to push me to meet a nice guy.

“Brian is great. He knows his shit. It will be good to have a little extra time with him taking over a few nights for me soon.”

“Is he good-looking?” And, here we go.

“Mom.” I warn her with my tone.

“What? Can’t a mother ask if her daughter is ever going to date again?” She refuses to acknowledge Stone’s existence, but she’s still kept in the loop since my dad helped handle my case. However, because he couldn’t represent me in the state of Massachusetts, he had to relinquish that duty to his second-hand girl in the Boston office. Patrick Daley isn’t a huge lawyer in Connecticut, but he has connections all over New England because he attended Suffolk University Law School. Davis & Daley, LLC., is a small law firm, but they hold their own against some of the biggest lawyers out there.

I wonder if I ought to tell my mom about meeting Josh tonight; I can’t see the harm in mentioning it since she has been pushing lately. Plus, is our meeting at the bar I manage really that much of a date?

Placing my lip-gloss back onto my vanity, I respond, “If you’re that curious, you should know I’m actually meeting a guy at Vines tonight. All I’m going to tell you is we met by accident a couple of times, and he’s a cop who just moved to town. It’s just a couple of drinks, so don’t get too excited.”

“Sweetie, that’s fantastic! I’m so happy for you, Sam. It’s time. I know you’re ready.”

“Mom?” I struggle to find the words. “Tell me this is right. I hate thinking every one of them is like
him
.”

“Whoever this guy is, Sam, he’s not him. Trust your heart, but listen to your mind. You’ll know if something is off. I love you.”

“I love you too, Mom.”

We say our goodbyes, and I promise to call her later and let her know how things went. Checking again in the mirror to make sure I appear presentable, I spot Lucy standing in my doorway. Slowly walking over to me, she gives me a slight smile and plays with my hair. It’s a habit for her, but she has always been the prettiest one in the house. I’ve been her guinea pig many nights as she primps, curls, and colors my hair. Her soft eyes meet mine, and she brings me in for a hug. “I’m so happy you’re finally doing this, Sam. It’s a huge step, but you’re ready. Have fun and take chances with him. Lord knows that cop is a fine piece of ass.”

Parking my car in the lot across the street from the bar, I notice the open mic night and happy hour bustling inside. I’m early, so I expect to have some extra time to make sure things are in order before sitting down with Josh.

When I open the front door, my eyes do a double take. Sitting at the back of the bar talking to Cara are Nick and Josh. My questioning eyes move slowly with my feet through the crowd of people chatting. Sensing my arrival, Josh’s eyes move from his conversation to watch me as I approach.

Cara comes running around the bar to me and grabs my elbows, shaking them softly. “Thank God, you’re here! Have you seen this place? It’s off the hook tonight. I can’t handle the crowd.” Josh must hear her and wonder how we know each other. I never mentioned to him that I manage the bar. I also have never mentioned to anyone that my parents own part of the place along with me.

Once I settled after the trial, I needed something to keep me busy. With my degree and knowledge, I knew this was something I wanted to do. So, my parents helped fund the business to ensure I could live as worry-free as possible. From the looks of things right now, I made the right decision.

I look up at Cara and back at Josh who is still staring at me with inquisitive eyes. Then, Nick turns his head to me, and everyone is now wondering how we all know each other.

“Okay,” I say, turning my attention back to Cara. “Everything is fine. Have you called Brian to see if he could come in for a bit to help? He only lives a few miles away.”

“But, you’re here. Aren’t you working tonight?” Cara asks before glancing to see me wearing dress pants, heels, and makeup. “Wait? It’s Wednesday, right? Why are you all dressed up?”

Looking back at Josh, I see a confident smirk grow on his face before he takes a sip of his beer. “I’m meeting someone here,” I tell her.

“Oh my gosh, Sam! You’ve got a date, and you didn’t tell me? I’m hurt. So, who’s the
hottie?” Cara all but screams to the bar until one of the other waitresses grabs her attention as the drink orders pile up. “Ugh, tell me who this guy is while I get these drink orders done,” she says as she pulls me up to the bar. Shyly, I glance at Josh as he says something to Nick. He turns his attention back to me as I stand less than a foot away as Cara continues to probe, “What’s his name? What does he look like?” She sputters off the questions at a rapid pace, trying to stay on top of three beer taps being poured. Once she’s caught up, she comes back over since I’ve yet to answer any of them. Leaning against the bar and shaking her head at me, she asks, “So? Who is this mystery man?”

I glance over to see Josh laughing before I break out in my own laughter because there is no way our encounters could be any more oddly put together. Kim said it was fate. I’m starting to think she might be onto something. As my laughter subsides, I look at Cara and nod my head toward Josh next to me.

It takes her a moment to look between the two of us, but she figures it out once Nick slaps Josh on the back and lets out a full-bellied laugh. Cara’s eyes bug out of her head before she exclaims, “Him?!”

Once everyone realizes I’m here to meet Sam, we retreat to a quiet corner at the back of the bar. Sam grabs a glass of white wine for herself and pours me a new pint before we settle on the sofa to talk. Nick and Cara keep shooting curious glances our way. Nick has heard me talk up this gorgeous brunette, who is now sitting beside me, all afternoon. Never in a million years did either of us expect her to be the bar manager.

I place my beer onto the table in front of me before I lean back casually, placing my arm over the back of the sofa toward Sam. She appears to tense a little in her posture while holding her wine glass with a little more hardness than before I moved. Why is she so nervous? Scratching the day old stubble on my chin, I attempt to break the ice. “So, how long have you managed this place?”