I don't Wear Sunscreen (12 page)

“
Hmm! So when did you know
that I work for him?”

“
When you saw the pictures
and asked me that night, one of the worst, I was all drunk and
never knew what exactly happened. Been a while, Am not in touch
with Saurav much,”

“
Can you call him now? I
just want to ask him something,” Laksha asked in a pleasing
manner.

“
I will,” said Priyanka and
dialed his number.

***

“
Long time Priyanka, how are
you?” Saurav asked with enthusiasm.

“
Am good, but am Laksha and
not Priyanka,” she said.

“
Laksha?” he
asked.

“
Yes, sir, would like to
know why my calls and mails were not reverted,” Laksha
asked.

“
I hope you know what a pink
slip means, it means that you don’t deserve to know the reason why
we expelled you from the company,” he answered
professionally.

“
Sir, please, I trust and
respect you, please give me one good reason,”

“
You want one? Well, I have
a list. Too many holiday plans and leaves in a short period, not
completing the assignments, not informing your leaves and add few
more “not’s” before whatever you are supposed to do. You ruined my
respect for you, ” he flushed his anger.

“
Is that all? I was not
well-”

“
I don’t want patients and
mentally ill fools in my office Laksha, you ruined my company’s
reputation in front of my clients,” he yelled.

Laksha went mute over the words he
spelled and her eyes welled. She cut the call and remained
quiet.

“
Please Laksha-“

“
It's ok Priyanka, I can
deal myself, please have your coffee,” she said and stirred her
Irish coffee, which she usually takes whenever she hits
Amethyst.

“
You want me to drop you
somewhere?” she asked after some silence while she saw her
finishing her drink.

“
Nah, I will take an auto
from here, how will you go?”

“
My home is very near,
Gopalapuram,” she said.

***

Sometimes to cry, doesn’t mean you are
weak, it means you are stronger letting go of things that hurt you.
Many a times, we hear to cry a river and walk over the bridge,
which most of us find it difficult. Being bombarded with too many
taboos and issues, and mostly million dollar questions, Laksha
found it difficult.

“
You know there are many a
things happening in the world, few get divorced, few lose their
loved ones in a terrible accident, few are orphans, and you are
bothered about your life which is nothing before-“

“
Even stealing a candy from
a kid is cheating, and it is devastating for that kid, don’t define
what would bother who,” Laksha threw the arrow before her father
could finish the sentence.

He went mute for a while, walked across
the hall and smiled at his wife with pride. She smirked and walked
across, to give Laksha a cup of milk. They were proud of her, no
matter what, any parent would feel proud whatever the child
achieves or not. After all, they are parents!

***

“
Get some fresh air, go walk
around, see something interesting, come back when you feel better,”
her mom said.

Laksha walked past the road, took the
first bus and got down in a while when she noticed a big park. She
walked in, to see all age groups in there, there were old couples
walking and young chaps playing tennis. She smiled at the kids
playing see-saw and felt light. She heard some toddler’s voice
nearby, and walked past the park to notice a pre-school and she
stood right there, watching the kids. From then on, she started
visiting every day, and felt way too good to see the
kids.

“
I feel much better, I guess
I want to become a teacher,” Laksha said to her parents at the
dinner.

“
Good option, do whatever
you want, all we want to see is, you are leading a peaceful life,”
her dad said.

“
Should I approach the same
pre-school,” she asked her mom.

“
Let’s give it a try, but if
it fails, don’t worry, I will make arrangements,”

“
I have been watching your
daughter visiting our kids every day, but, we have rules and
regulations with the qualifications one requires turning a
pre-school teacher. Am afraid, she can't join in here,” said the
pre-school in-charge when Laksha’s mom tried her luck with
them.

“
My daughter had some
depressing moments, watching these kids every day, gives her peace,
we are not looking for money or anything else. Please let her visit
these kids, let it be a disguise, I will pay for it,”

“
I am sorry, I don’t have
the privilege to take any decisions as such, but..”

“
But.. Do you have any other
option?”

“
I will check with other
branches and franchise of this school, let's see her luck,” said
the lady.

“
Thank you, I will be more
than happy to receive your call,” she gave her number and came back
home.

“
I would be more than happy
to teach, it is nice to see those teachers in there helping those
toddlers to learn the basics. Maybe, I should teach aspiring
architects mom, I think so, because I know enough to teach others,
I will apply for a M.Sc course and then pick teaching, alright” she
said.

“
Nice, go ahead,” she
said.

***

The days rolled and the call from one
of the pre-school franchise got Laksha’s mom a job after 20 years.
She took the opportunity, as Laksha took up the M.Sc course and
both excelled. Laksha’s dad was pretty happy to see both of them,
picking a career of their choice and making the most of
it.

Every day, talks about “you know there
is a kid named...” and “That parent cried watching the kid reciting
poems...” fancied her dad. After all, he was thrilled to see his
wife proud and more confident. He also enrolled her in the
prerequisite course that one requires to join as a teacher, and he
planned to take a separate franchise, if things go well!

***

Thoughts of Sai would creep in and
disturb her, sweet disturbance though. That one expression where we
lay our eyes comfortably staring an abstract object, and smiling
with a heavy heart when we miss a loved one, even after being
betrayed just proves us human. Feeling inferior, or less than what
we deserve or even whiling away that we deserve much better than
the relationship we went through, goes in vain. If a past
relationship hurts you now, it means you matured over time, but
what was it can never be replaced by any other memory. To fall in
love is human, to betray is also human if you take a closer look at
it.

Laksha sipped her favorite coffee, at
Barista in Besant Nagar. She missed Pallavi, though she was not
ready to accept why she left all of a sudden. A couple crossing the
road in bike, reminded Sai and his cute and flattering
talks.

“
Will you invite me for your
wedding?” Sai asked while driving her to the hostel
room.

“
Gosh, will I? I will not
even meet you by then,” she giggled.

“
Then who will drop you back
home from work?”

“
Definitely not you, you
will never receive my wedding card,” she chuckled with a
punch.

“
Well, yeah, and I know the
reason,” he grinned and she pat his head shying away.

Good days, she thought looking away
from those in the café, who gave a stern look watching her sipping
coffee alone. “Who comes alone to Barista?” they thought, which she
ignored and felt peace, walking near the beach.

***

2 years passed, and Laksha joined a
mediocre college as a teaching assistant.

“
Ensure you all stand in
proper queue, and don’t talk to anyone unnecessarily,” Laksha
instructed her students, and walked straight searching her college
students.

Scorching sun, and it is so hard to
stand in here, she thought and moved to a shade.

“
Hi, you look familiar,” a
voice approached to which Laksha turned furrowing.

“
No, I don’t think so, I
just joined this college few months back,” Laksha told, but
something struck her and she was already figuring out
things.

“
Well, okay, but I am a
social activist for years together, I have been doing this from
school days,” he said.

“
That’s nice, wow! I was not
at all interested in any of these things, even now, but yeah, as a
college professor I should accompany my students. Have been to one
during my school days I guess and just that,” Laksha
told.

“
I was not keenly interested
initially, I would just approach beautiful young girls back then
and lately, I started involving with interest and years rolled like
crazy,”

A small kid approached and handed over
a small tube to him, “Sir, sunscreen lotion,” he said and rushed
away.

“
I don’t wear sunscreen, do
you?” he asked.

“
I don’t,” she said and
smiled.

“
Am Prabhu, and
you?”

“
Laksha” she said and their
eyes met!

***The End***

Epilogue

How will I ever tell you? -
Pallavi

Pallavi –Software Developer,
read the ID card that I wore. I had a very tough day, and I walked
out of my office and traveled back to my hostel in OMR. I crossed
the colleges to reach the other far end of the district, where I
stayed in an apartment. Yes, I crossed the “Nurture – play school”
that Laksha’s mom runs, that was yards away from my
office.“
Hmmm
,” I
told myself feeling a sink as if my heart dropped an anchor deep
down. I felt heavy.

“
I am near you, will we ever
meet? When we do, will I ever have the guts to talk to
you?
” I was talking to Laksha within me.
“
I can’t forgive myself for what I did to
you, but maybe, you will definitely forgive me, if you get to know
the truth,
” I said to my Laksha who is
within me again.

There were two cute kids
playing with each other, they resembled the ease of being together,
feeling nice and all that. “
This is how we
were Laksha, I fucked what we were, the moment I got to know that I
will wear this ID card the very next day,
”
I scolded myself and banged myself in the window’s bars.

The phone rang, “Where are you
Pallavi?” he asked.

“
On the way, will reach in
the next twenty minutes,” I told and cut the call.

“
Husband
ended
” read the gray colored text when I
pressed the red button with the old received symbol.
“
Wow, too good to read
this
,” I felt.

“
I know you were ill Laksha,
and I also know you will be fine pretty soon. I know that if I
break open the truth, it would break you down into chunks that
would have made it even harder for your revamping survival,” I
thought, as if am talking to her. I imagined talking to her on a
serene beach.

“
I have made mistakes, and
have done only that,” I thought. “You’re good for nothing” I told
myself.

“
But, I saved you from a
person who would have ditched you big time,” I smiled with pride,
but the price paid is high though.

“
I don’t know, whether
meeting you would do any good. How can I ever tell you, that I
attended the phone call from Sai in Coimbatore? How will I ever
say, that I felt vulnerable and re-routed him to forget you giving
fake meaning to your character? How will I ever tell you, that I
was talking to him the whole night confusing him to forget you? How
will I ever, ever, ever tell you that I liked Sai and Prabhu are
not the same, but I lied,
” I was slapping
myself for every question that I kept asking myself.

“
Did I just do all this to
get this blue tag around my neck?
” she
might think so. “
She will definitely feel
happy that I made it to get back the home from the debtors, when
she gets to know, but yeah, I ditched her for this reason as
well
” I thought and felt filthy.

“
Velachery,” the conductor
raised his voice, and I swiftly distracted myself and walked down
the steps.

I surfed to see if any Honda active
with a well dressed, tummy popping person is waiting for me,
turning back every few seconds. I did find him, and rushed, with a
smile, a faker one thought.

“Hey Vasanth, how was your day?” I asked him.

“
Good one Pall, hope it was
the same with you!” he told and raised to Vroom. He doesn’t like to
ask questions, I know. After all, it's been a year that I got
married to him. He found it difficult to balance and tripped upon a
stone, people around rushed and a few hands held me.

“
Are you mad? With a
pregnant lady by your side, won’t you be careful,” I heard a few
voices from all around.