Authors: Andrea Martin

Lady Parts (27 page)

Acknowledgements

B
ooks are hard to write, but easier if you have the following people in your corner:

Seth Rudetsky, James Wesley, Matt Roberts, David Feldman, Nathan Lane, Sam Wasson, Linda Wallem, Bruce Villanch, Walter Bobbie, Dani Klein Modisett, Marc Shaiman, Scott Wittman, Sean Hayes, and Mel Brooks. THANK YOU.

Thank you to Andrew Alexander and Second City, Ivan Reitman, Barry Weissler, Stephan Schwartz, and Lin-Manuel Miranda for allowing me to reproduce material.

To Paul Trusciani, for your generosity and loving reminiscences of my father. To my sister, Marcie, my brother, Peter, my cousin Stephanie Stearns, my sons, Jack and Joe Dolman, for your unconditional love. To my extended Armenian family, who gave me my roots, and to my hairdresser, Pascal, who restored them to their natural colour.

To Mel Morgan, for your patience and computer savvy.

To Deb Monk, my dear friend and life coach.

To Judi Cooper-Sealy and Bev Schectman, for your artistry and your Poloroids.

Thank you Bob Dolman, Catherine O’Hara, Martin Short, Mike Short, Eugene Levy, Dave Thomas, and Dick Blasucci for answering my emails, and reigniting my memory of our
SCTV
years together.

To Perry Zimel, my manager, for walking me into the HarperCollins boardroom, and to Jim Gifford, my editor, who greeted me at the door and stayed by my side. THANK YOU all from the bottom of my heart. I seriously could not have written this book without you.

About the Author

ANDREA MARTIN
was cast in the 1970 American touring company production of
You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown
, in which she played Lucy. During the tour, she visited Toronto, fell in love with the city, and moved there. Soon after, she was cast in the legendary Toronto production of
Godspell
with fellow performers Victor Garber, Martin Short, Eugene Levy, Dave Thomas, Gilda Radner, Jayne Eastwood, and Paul Shaffer, the musical director. Martin has appeared in numerous theatre and television productions in Canada, the most notable being Toronto’s Second City stage show, which led to the critically acclaimed SCTV. She has been honoured by Canada’s Walk of Fame and Toronto’s Women in Film & Television awards. Martin has also received four ACTRA awards, two Geminis, two Emmys, and two Tony awards, the most recent for her highly acclaimed role as Berthe in
Pippin
. Her film credits include the soon-to-be-released
Night at the Museum 3
, as well as
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
and
Hedwig and
the
Angry Inch
. In the spring of 2014, Martin opened on Broadway in the American premiere of James Lapine’s
Act One
, based on Moss Hart’s autobiography. Martin divides her time between New York and Toronto when she is not interfering in the lives of her grown sons, Jack and Joe, who reside in Los Angeles.

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Advance Praise for
ANDREA MARTIN’S LADY PARTS

“A lively, bawdy, and emotional memoir from one of our finest comedic artists.”
Steve Martin

“Andrea Martin’s genius at combining hilarity and poignancy is breathtaking and will break your heart. From the first page, you know this is going to be a brilliant and joyous ride with one of the truly great, funny originals.”
Martin Short

“For years, everyone has known that Andrea Martin is one of this planet’s funniest people, but now, after reading her book, they will know she is also one of its most human.
Lady Parts
transcends the conventions of celebrity memoir to reveal, with incredible and moving honesty, the insides of a gymnastic brain on hyperdrive, a troubled (and hilarious) consciousness trying its dogged damnedest to be good–good in love, good in family, and good in work. And who isn’t? For many people–men and women, in show business and out–I bet reading Martin’s book will be like looking in a mirror.”
Sam Wasson,
New York Times
–bestselling author of
Fifth Avenue, 5 A.M.
, and
Fosse

“Andrea Martin is a remarkable woman, and she has written a remarkable book of very personal, brutally honest, hilariously funny, and incredibly moving essays that will take you by surprise. This is a real writer at work, not just another celebrity author, and if you know her just as the brilliant Tonyand Emmy-winning actress and comedienne, you will be knocked out by the intelligence, wit, and compassion of her storytelling. Andrea Martin’s
Lady Parts
are worth a try, and if I had a nickel for every time I’ve said that!”
Nathan Lane

Credits

A
ll photographs courtesy the author, except as follows:
p. 17
“KIT KAT
^®is a registered trademark of Société des Produits Nestlé S.A., Vevey, Switzerland, used with permission;
p. 141
used with permission;
p. 142
courtesy the Johnny Carson Estate, used with permission;
p. 273
(Golde) courtesy Carol Rosegg, used with permission;
p. 273
(Frau Blucher), photograph © Paul Kolnik, used with permission;
pp. 275
and
276
(Aunt Voula) photography by Sophie Giraud, courtesy of Gold Circle Films, used with permission;
p. 279
courtesy Dan Goldberg and Ivan Reitman, used with permission;
p. 291
courtesy Barry Weissler, used with permission;
pp. 19
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280
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281
,
293
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300
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305
,
309
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311
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,
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,
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43
courtesy The Second City Entertainment, Inc. and Fireworks Entertainment. Inc., used with permission.

“Teacher” transcribed from the Benefit of Laughter, Toronto, 2008. Originally created by John Monteith, Ben Gordon, Catherine O’Hara, Joe Flaherty, and Andrea Martin. Used with permission.

“HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS.” Words and Music by HUGH MARTIN and RALPH BLANE © 1943 (Renewed) METRO-GOLDWYN-MAYER INC. © 1944 (Renewed) EMI FEIST CATALOG INC. All Rights Controlled by EMI FEIST CATALOG INC. (Publishing) and ALFRED MUSIC PUBLISHING CO., INC. (Print). All Rights Reserved. Used by Permission of ALFRED MUSIC.

COVER PHOTOGRAPH: DON DIXON

Copyright

Lady Parts
Copyright © 2014 by Andrea Martin.

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

EPUB Edition September 2014 ISBN 9781443443920

Published by HarperCollins Publishers Ltd

FIRST EDITION

No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews.

Pages 351–352 constitute a continuation of this copyright page.

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