Remember Me (Men of Honor Series Book 1) (13 page)

Taking the steps two at a time, he made his way through the back entrance without being noticed. A symphony of ringing phones, footsteps, and murmuring voices bounced off the tile floor. He missed this place. Turning a corner, he bumped straight into Dane.

“Hey man!” Dane’s look of surprise turned into a pleasant smile.

The two men shook hands and exchanged a bear hug. “Man, it’s good to see you.” Ben had missed his friend, but didn’t realize how much until that moment.

“It’s good to see you too.” Dane waved him toward a door across the hall. “Let’s talk in here.”

They entered a small room that held a conference table with six chairs. The two men sat across from one another. It was good to see Dane. His short, dark hair and black, wide-rimmed glasses sat perfectly in place. The other detectives teased him that he looked like a desk jockey. His sport coat and dress shirt never mussed. The western-looking belt buckle he always wore with jeans and boots didn’t help either. The guys were relentless in their ribbing over that. Dane took it all in stride. Always calm and cool. Said the glasses made him look smart. The other guys were just jealous because they were slobs.

Man, he missed this place.

“What are you doing here? I told you I’d call you when I could.” Dane’s comments brought Ben back to the room, the old black conference table cold beneath his fingers.

“I know. I just needed to come back for a few things and thought I’d stop in and see you, get an update in person.”

Dane shook his head. “That’s a risk, man, and you know it. If Menendez sees you anywhere near this place, your cover’s blown.”

“My cover may be blown already.”

Dane leaned back in his chair. His hands settled on his belt buckle, his fingers linked together. “That’s true, but I don’t think so.”

“What do you know?”

“Well, rumor has it that Carlos thinks you either ran scared or you’re dead. Either way, he doesn’t seem too worried about you.”

“You really think he would just be done with me that fast?”

“You found enough on him to bust him, but only minor charges that would lock him away for a minimum amount of time. Maybe he thinks you tucked your tail and ran. Just another wannabe dealer who couldn’t hack it.”

Ben leaned back and rubbed his beard. “That seems too easy. Besides, that wouldn’t explain all that’s been happening to Tess.”

“Tess? What’s Tess got to do with this?”

It was time for Dane to know everything. Ben filled him in about her so-called accident and the guy breaking into her house.

“Yeah. That sounds fishy at best. But not exactly how Menendez usually works.”

“That was my thought too.” Ben leaned toward his friend. “Look. I’ve gotta go. I need to get back before Tess suspects anything. Keep me posted on anything you hear, okay?”

The two men stood. “Of course. And you do the same.” They shook hands. “Be careful, Ben. I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

“Yeah. Me too.”

Tess closed a file and placed it in the stack with the others.

“Done!” She patted the pile with satisfaction.

“Well, aren’t we Miss Perky today,” Gwen teased. Tess spun in her chair to face her boss.

“I don’t know about perky, but I think my coffee has definitely kicked in.” She giggled.

“I think there’s more than coffee responsible for this mood.” Gwen took her glasses off her nose and let them hang from the chain around her neck. “This has something to do with Lumberjack Boy.”

Gwen knew Ben’s name. She also knew he’d become a part of Tess’s life. But Gwen loved to call him Lumberjack. Tess thought it was a sweet endearment, so she let the older woman have her fun.

“Maybe.” Tess winked.

“Well, well. The lady doesn’t even protest too much, if at all. That’s interesting.”

Tess leaned back in her chair. “Now, don’t go letting your mind get crazy on me, Gwen. I’m not sure what the future holds for me, or Ben. But I’m sure it’s not some crazy ending like one of the romance novels we’re always reading.”

Gwen laughed. “Go ahead. Make fun. But those stories are good, and I think some could be true!”

“The stories
are
good, but you’re a hopeless romantic, my friend.”

“Guilty.” Gwen winked and grabbed a file from the desk. “I’ll be in Room 210 if you need me.”

“Got it, boss.”

Tess spun her chair back around to face the desk. It had been a good work shift. Not too many patients coming through, which was a good thing. She didn’t wish an ER visit on anyone. But there was enough to keep her mind busy and not entirely on a certain lumberjack.

Gwen was right. Ben was the reason for her good mood. But every time she thought of telling him the truth about his past, her stomach turned. Maybe it wasn’t such a good idea. Things were good between them – great even. Would it be so bad if they just moved forward without dwelling on the past?

Who was she kidding? She couldn’t have a future with Ben without her family and friends knowing.

Her phone dinged in her purse, alerting her to a text message. Maybe it was Ben.

She got out her phone and checked the screen.

Call me as soon as you get this
.

“Was she reading my thoughts?” Tess spoke to the phone as if her sister could actually hear her. Frowning, she dialed her little sister’s number and waited for her to pick up. Aimee didn’t say it was an emergency, but she rarely just told Tess to call without saying why.

Aimee answered after one ring. “Hey, Sis. Can you talk?”

“Yeah, sure. It’s quiet here for the moment. What’s up? Are Mom and Dad okay? Is it Grace?” Their older sister was pregnant with her first baby. Tess made a mental note to call her soon as well and check in.

“Oh, yeah. Everyone here is totally fine. Sorry. I should have said that.” Papers rustled in the background and Aimee whispered, “Sure. I’ll get to that in a sec.”

Tess could see her sister, long auburn curls pulled up into a clip, glasses askew, papers strewn across her desk. Aimee worked as a sketch artist for the police. An artist with her hands in eight different projects at a time.

“Can
you
talk right now?”

“Ugh. Sorry. Yes I can. I just got back home and sat down at my desk to work, and my roommate needed something. Sorry. I’m here. Talk.”

Tess laughed. Since they were little girls, Aimee was always a bundle of energy, able to do eighteen things at once. However, if she tried for nineteen, her focus sometimes got off track. Tenacious didn’t even begin to describe her.

“You told me to call, remember? This conversation is yours.”

“Oh. Yeah. Right. Well, I’m not sure how to say this so I’m just gonna blurt it out. I think I saw Ben down at the police department today.”

Tess’s good mood took a nosedive.

Aimee filled the silence. “At first I thought it was just my eyes acting funny, but I had my glasses on. And then I noticed him walking away from a car that looked just like yours. That can’t be right though, Sis. Why would he be driving your car? And what the heck is he doing here, anyway? I thought he was off gallivanting over Europe, trying to find himself.”

Aimee’s words flew around Tess’s head like bees. The buzzing was there, but nothing was landing. Ben was in San Diego? “Tess? Are you there?” Aimee’s voice brought her from her thoughts.

“Yes. I’m here. Sorry. Um, I’m not sure what to say. I have no idea why he would be there.”

“What about your car?”

“Maybe it was just another car that looked like mine.” She didn’t keep secrets from her sister, but she sure didn’t want to talk about Ben and the past few days just yet. Not until she knew herself what was going to happen.

“Hmmm. Maybe. I just think it seems fishy, that’s all.”

Ben said he needed her car today, but why wouldn’t he tell her he was going to San Diego? He was probably trying to find out more information about Jake Wilson. A headache formed in the back of her skull and crept its way forward. She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead.

“Hey, Sis, thanks for calling. I’ve gotta go. And don’t think anything of it. I’m sure it was just a coincidence.”

“If you say so. But just know if that guy shows his face anywhere around here, he’s gonna have your sisters to deal with. And it won’t be pretty.”

Tess smiled. The love of her family kept her going after Ben left. Her sisters acting like warriors ready to strike at anyone who crossed her path.

“Thanks. I’ll remember that. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

The line went dead. Tess stared at the now black screen of her phone. She should just ask Ben if he went to San Diego. But why would he hide it?

***

Tess scanned the parking lot for her car. If Ben wasn’t there, maybe Aimee was right. Maybe he went to San Diego and didn’t make it back in time to pick her up from work.

Her eyes caught sight of the blue convertible as Ben guided it around the lot and up to where she was standing. Right on time. That meant nothing. He still could have driven all that way. Or not.

“Door-to-door service, my lady.” Ben smiled at her from behind the wheel, his hair tussled from driving with the top down. Her knees turned to jelly. Resisting this man was
way
too hard. Every part of her being wanted to believe he wasn’t lying to her. Believe he hadn’t remembered. But the note left for her a week before the wedding kept flashing through her mind. If he was that coldhearted then, why wouldn’t he be deceitful now?

He hopped out and opened her door for her. “Your chariot awaits.”

She smiled and slid into the passenger seat. Being charmed by the man was too easy.

They drove in silence, Tess not sure her heart was ready for the conversation she knew should come. The sea air was helping clear her head. The closer they got to home, the more she thought telling him who he was wasn’t such a good idea. Maybe he needed to come to it on his own. Or maybe he
had
already and was biding his time until he could get up the nerve to tell her what happened. Why he left. The confusion made her dizzy.
Lord, give me wisdom
.

“Penny for your thoughts.” His deep voice broke her concentration.

She smiled.

“What?” He took her hand, entwining her fingers with his own.

“A…friend… and I used to say that to each other. The other would always answer with ‘They’re always yours for free.’ You just reminded me of that.”

“It sounds like a happy memory. That’s good, right?”

He kissed her knuckles while expertly maneuvering her car into her driveway.

Unwrapping her hand from his, she got out of the car. Ben did the same. They walked into her house together, much like they did every day now. He’d hang out for dinner, or breakfast, whichever was the appropriate meal after her work shift. Then he’d head home to Mike’s. How long could they keep doing this? She was fooling herself. And him.

She plopped her purse on the front table. “Hey, I’m gonna go take a quick shower and then I want to talk to you about something.”

“Okay. I’ll get some dinner going. How’s that sound?”

“Perfect. Thanks.”

Halfway up the stairs, Tess remembered her workout bag still in the car from yesterday. It had the shampoo in it she wanted. Ben had his back to her, his head stuck in the fridge. He hummed while he searched for ingredients. A smile crossed her lips. Maybe he would remember once she told him. And maybe the reason he left her was something she could forgive. Her future rode on the back of a lot of maybes.

She sighed and went to get her bag from her car. She popped open the trunk, and a flash of gold caught her eye. What looked like a black leather wallet stuck out from underneath an old towel she’d thrown in and forgotten to take inside. What would a wallet be doing in her trunk? She picked it up and flipped it open.

Her heartbeat pounded in her ears. She felt sick to her stomach. Ben’s detective badge. What was it doing in her trunk? She rummaged around in the same place. A cell phone was tucked under the towel. She picked it up and stared at the screen. Why would Ben’s badge and a cell phone be in her trunk? Her mind told her one thing, but her heart refused to believe it. Aimee was right. He
did
go to San Diego.

Tears welled in her eyes. She swallowed them. Her finger bumped a button on the phone and a picture popped up. The tears she valiantly tried to hold back now fell freely. Holding a hand to her stomach, she sat on the back of the car, halfway in the trunk.

Without a doubt, she had her answer. She and Ben were done.

***

Ben hummed while he chopped lettuce for a salad. He didn’t get the answers he wanted from his trip to San Diego, but he at least got to see Dane. And if Dane was right, if Carlos thought him dead or gone, maybe he could move forward with Tess and leave the past where it belonged. He wanted to believe Carlos would leave him alone, consider him a loser that didn’t have the guts to be a drug dealer. But a small voice in the back of his mind told him it wouldn’t be that easy.

He had to focus on Tess and how to handle recovering his memory. Her accident and the burglar lurked in his mind. To let his guard down now would just be stupid. But to act like a cop would only let Tess in on his secret. He shook his head. A secret. He’d never kept anything from Tess before. At least not until his undercover job. But telling her the truth now meant facing all he did when he left. He wasn’t sure he was ready for that. Was she ready for that?

He heard someone come in the front door. Instinct made him turn the knife in his hand toward the intruder. Tess stood in the doorway. He dropped his hand and let out a breath, mentally berating himself for being so lost in thought.

“You startled me.” He went back to making a salad. “And that’s not easy to do, ya know? I’ve been told…”

“Ben.”

The cold steel of her voice ran like ice down his spine. He put the knife down and turned to her. A few steps away from him, she stood holding his badge in one hand, his undercover cell phone in the other. Her red-rimmed eyes and tear-stained face tore at his gut and wrenched his heart in two.