Authors: Lynn LaFleur
“Mom, you don’t know that for sure.”
“But what if he does? What if I stay involved with him and five years from now, he suddenly realizes what he’s missing by not having children?”
“I think you’re looking for trouble before it ever happens.”
“I have to, Bre.” Jade pushed her bangs off her forehead. “I’ve been with him for almost two weeks. Every moment has been incredible. He’s the most wonderful man. Sexy, yes, but so much more than that. He makes me laugh. That’s so important to me. I don’t want to lose him.”
“You won’t.” Breanna reached across the table and squeezed Jade’s hand. “He loves you, Mom. I’ve seen the two of you together. The way he looks at you, with so much love and lust in his eyes, makes my heart hurt with jealousy.”
Her joke made Jade chuckle. “Thanks, sweetie.”
“He loves you as much as you love him. Don’t throw that away because you’re afraid of something that may never happen.”
“In here,” Jade touched her temple. “I know you’re right. In here,” she touched her chest over her heart. “I’m scared. Getting involved with a man ten years my junior was so stupid.”
“You can’t plan who you fall in love with, Mom.”
“No, you can’t, and that’s precisely why I should’ve told him to leave my house first thing Sunday morning after the gala instead of continuing to see him.”
Breanna sat back in her chair. “What are you going to do? Are you going to break up with him?”
“I should.”
“No, you shouldn’t. Mom, you
love
him. You’ve never been this happy in your life. I know you loved Dad, but he wasn’t your soul mate. Zach is.”
Breanna was right. Jade had never felt the depth of love for Carl that she felt for Zach. Despite knowing him only two weeks, she had no doubt about her feelings for him. It didn’t seem possible that she could love him even more than she already did. She suspected as time passed, she’d only grow to love him more.
“Are you seeing Zach tonight?” Breanna asked.
“He’s taking me out to dinner.” Jade smiled, remembering the beautiful bouquet of two dozen red roses that had been delivered to her office this morning. “I told him my birth date the night of the gala. He remembered it. He sent me roses.”
“Mom, you cannot give up a guy that romantic and loving.”
Tears suddenly filled Jade’s eyes. “I don’t want to.”
“Then don’t.” Breanna leaned forward again and rested her arms on the table. “Don’t assume he’ll want something in the future when you don’t know for sure that’ll happen.” A hint of a grin turned up her lips. “Besides, I think having such a sexy stepfather will be cool.”
Jade laughed. “You’ll brag to all your girlfriends?”
“Damn right.”
“I think you’re rushing the stepfather bit.”
“I don’t. I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if he proposed to you tonight.”
“After only two weeks?”
Breanna shrugged. “Why wait when you know it’s the real thing?”
* * * * *
Jade thought about her conversation with her daughter while she dressed for her date with Zach. She honestly didn’t think he would propose marriage to her so soon. Two weeks was much too quick for something so serious.
She stood in her closet in the pale blue bra and panties she’d bought for herself today, trying to decide what to wear, when her doorbell rang. She knew it wouldn’t be Breanna, and it was too early for Zach. Grabbing a robe, she quickly slipped it on while she walked down the hall.
She opened her front door, and gasped softly. Zach stood on her porch, looking like a model out of
GQ
in a navy suit, light gray shirt, and coordinating tie.
He smiled. “Good evening.”
She returned his smile. “Good evening.”
“I know I’m early, but I want to give you something before we leave for dinner.”
Jade moved to the side. “Come in.”
Zach stepped inside and she closed the door behind him. When she turned to face him, she saw him holding a single lilac rose.
Her heart swelled and a lump formed in her throat. “Another rose?” she said, her voice husky.
“A lilac rose means enchantment. That’s what the florist told me. I thought that appropriate since I was completely enchanted the first time I saw you.”
She accepted his rose, then his soft kiss. “Thank you,” she whispered.
Cradling her cheek in his hand, he rubbed his thumb over her lips. “You’re very welcome.”
The love in his eyes stole her breath. She knew Carl had loved her, but he’d never looked at her with so much emotion, so much passion.
“Ready for your present?”
“The rose isn’t my present?”
“Only an appetizer.” Zach reached in his jacket pocket and drew out a small, rectangular box. “Happy birthday, Jade.”
Her hands trembling, Jade reached for the black velvet box. She opened it, and gasped again when she saw the oval emerald surrounded by small diamonds. Tears sprang to her eyes. “Oh, Zach,” she breathed.
“I wanted to get you something made of jade, but this necklace reminded me of the gown you wore on the night we met.” He took the box from her hand. “May I put it on you?”
She nodded and turned her back to him. When she felt the cool stone against her chest, she lifted her hair so he could fasten the clasp. “You probably spent way too much money on this.”
“So I’ll buy cheaper carpet for the house.” His lips touched her nape. “Turn around so I can see it.”
Jade faced him again. He touched the stone and smiled. “Very nice.” One finger dipped past the opening of her robe and into her cleavage. “I hope you have a dress that’s low enough to show off the necklace and these beautiful breasts.”
“I do.”
His finger slipped inside her bra and over a nipple. “Need some help getting dressed?”
“That’s not the way to help me get
dressed
.”
He grinned wickedly. “Can I help it if I love your body?”
“You can love it all you want…later.”
“Why not now?” He lightly pinched her nipple between his thumb and forefinger.
He didn’t make it easy for her to be strong. “You’d have to take off your suit.”
“Not to make you come.” He tugged on the tie of her robe until her robe fell open, then slid his hand inside the front of her panties. “Mmm, you’re getting wet already.” He leaned forward and ran the tip of his tongue over her lips. “Let me make you come.”
Summoning up all her willpower, she pulled his hands from her underwear. “Later, all right? I want us to make love together.”
“I enjoy giving you pleasure, Jade.”
“I know that.” She squeezed his hands. “The feeling is mutual. But we have dinner reservations, and I don’t want our lovemaking to be rushed.”
“All right.” He kissed her softly, then gave her a crooked grin. “I could still make you come.”
She laughed. “Yes, you could. There’s no doubt about that.” She began walking down the hall, tugging him behind her. “You can pick out the dress I wear tonight.”
* * * * *
Jade leaned against the doorframe and stared at the tiny sliver of moon. Tonight had been wonderful. A delicious dinner, a sinful dessert, dancing with the man she loved. She felt as she’d floated on a cloud all evening. And that was before she and Zach made love.
Every time he touched her, every time he slid his cock inside her, she loved him more.
She wiped a tear from her cheek. She should be lying in bed next to Zach. Instead, she stood at the patio door in her living room, alone in the dark, at one in the morning.
She loved Zach fiercely. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. But she didn’t know how that could be possible.
Loving him meant putting his needs and desires above her own. No matter how much she loved Zach, she had to think about him and his future. She had to do what was best for him.
That meant she had to end their relationship.
He’d find someone else…someone closer to his age, someone who could give him children. A man so good with kids would want his own. Perhaps children weren’t important to him now, but they would be someday. She had no doubt about that.
To give him happiness, she had to give up her own. She loved him enough to do that.
She started when she felt Zach’s hands on her waist.
“What’s wrong, babe?” He kissed the side of her neck. “Can’t you sleep?”
How can I do this? How can I break up with him without falling apart?
She quickly wiped the tears from her eyes before he saw them. “I’ve…been thinking.”
“About what?”
“About us.”
His arms slid around her waist. “I like the sound of that.”
“No, I don’t think you will.” Her heart pounded in her chest. Swallowing hard for courage, she turned to face him. “This isn’t working, Zach.”
“What isn’t working?”
“You and me.”
He took a step backward. “What?”
“I said I’d give us a chance and I did, but it isn’t working.”
He moved away from her. A moment later, he turned on a lamp. Jade blinked at the sudden light. “What do you mean, it isn’t working?”
His eyebrows drew together and he frowned. His confusion didn’t surprise Jade. She’d given him no indication that something could be wrong between them. “I can’t… I can’t get past our age difference, Zach. Ten years is too much.”
He shoved his hair off his forehead and huffed out a breath. “Jade, we’ve been over this a dozen times. I love you. I don’t care that you’re older than me. It doesn’t matter.”
“It doesn’t matter now, but what about in the future? What happens when I get wrinkles and gray hair?”
“What happens if I gain fifty pounds? Will you stop loving me if I no longer look like a stud?”
“Of course not. Love isn’t based on physical looks.”
“Then why do you insist on worrying about something that may never happen?”
“I
have
to, Zach. I have to think with my head and not my heart.” Her voice broke on the last word. Jade blinked back tears that rushed to her eyes again. She couldn’t weaken now.
“We made love a few hours ago,” Zach said, pointing toward the bedroom. “We
made love
, Jade. It wasn’t sex. Our souls, our hearts, connected as well as our bodies. How can you give that up?”
“A relationship has to be more than sex, Zach.”
“
Shit
!” He turned, took two steps away from her, then faced her again. The blazing anger in his eyes made her take a step back and cross her arms over her stomach. “We have a lot more than sex, Jade, you know that. I can get sex from any woman.”
She pointedly looked at his naked cock. “I’m well aware of that.”
His eyes narrowed. “Is that a dig about my former job?”
“No, it isn’t a dig. I know you’ve had sex with a lot of women. What happened in the past doesn’t matter.”
“Neither should our ages.” He walked up to her and clasped her upper arms. She now saw anguish mixed with anger. How she hated hurting him. “You wouldn’t do this if our ages were reversed, if I were ten years older than you.”
“That’s different.”
“Why? Because it’s ‘socially acceptable’ for the man to be older, but not the woman? I don’t give a damn about what’s socially acceptable or not. I only care about being with you.”
“I can’t have any more children, Zach.”
“I don’t care! I’ve already told you that.”
She opened her mouth to argue further, but he spoke again before she could utter a word. “And don’t give me any bullshit about me wanting children down the road. Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. And maybe I’ll get hit by a truck on my way to the grocery store. I won’t let the fear of that possibility keep me from driving.” He squeezed her arms. “I want a life with you, Jade.
You
. I love you.”