Road To Whatever (Perfect For Me Book 1) (11 page)

I close the distance in two quick steps and reach out to place my hands on her hips. She looks over her shoulder at me with a shy smile. “Kitty, you can’t wear these around this bus,” I growl.

“What?”

“Baby,” she straightens and turns to face me. I cup her plump backside. “These shorts are not for outside this room.”

“Well your sister dumped all my sweats out of my suitcase so my options are a little limited with nowhere to wash clothes and two months of being on this bus.”

“You can have at my boxers if you want babe but these shorts stay in this room,” I state. I am absolutely not giving on this one.

“Fine,” she sighs. “Can I get dressed now?”

I release her and step back to sit on the edge of the bed while she wiggles out of the shorts and pulls on a pair of jeans. This has just turned into the hardest two months of my life for a whole other reason. She sits down next to me to pull on a pair of boots.

“Ready,” she chirps when she is done and the bus comes to a stop.

My stomach answers for me. I tuck my girl under my arm and pull her through the bus to put some food in our bellies.

~B~

“This place is not so bad,” I say as I settle into the booth and Nolan slides in beside me.

“Nope, unless you think about the fact that this is our first date,” he replies.

I smile up at him. He is so cute like this. His grey eyes are twinkling at me and he has this incredibly sexy smile on his face that shows off his sexy little dimple. I feel so small sitting next to him but perfectly safe. He places one of his huge ripped arms around me and kisses the corner of my mouth.

“I’ll give you a pass given the circumstances,” I offer.

“Thanks babe,” he chuckles. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” I reply.

“You said you were afraid to let someone in. So I was thinking…when was your last relationship,” he quizzes.

Thank God the waitress shows up right at that moment. I am not ready to answer this particular question because it would lead to me talking about some things I have a tight cap on. I am not sure I am ready to be that vulnerable to him.

“How y’all doing tonight? My name is Anna and I will be serving y’all tonight,” the waitress says looking only at Nolan, with her large brown eyes and faded blonde hair. “Can I start y’all with drinks?”

I would say I can’t blame her for staring at Nolan but the dismissive vibe she is throwing my way is not helping my mood. I guess Nolan feels my mood change because he reaches for my back and starts to rub soothing circles on it.

“I’ll have a beer and my girl will have pineapple juice with sprite if you have,” Nolan answers. I am so thrown. I know we have been out to eat tons of times before but I didn’t know Nolan paid enough attention to know what I always order to drink.

“You ready to order or you need some more time,” she asks this time looking me over.

“I’ll have a cheeseburger and fries,” Nolan orders. “She’ll have the same but with onion rings and coleslaw on the side. Make sure her burger is well done.”

The waitress takes the menus away and goes to get our drinks. I turn to Nolan beaming. This is turning out to be a great first date.

“What,” Nolan laughs.

“I didn’t know you knew me so well,” I reply.

“I pay attention,” he smiles.

“I see,” I laugh. “What else have you paid attention to?”

“Let’s start with the fact that I notice when you are uncomfortable with a topic. Like right now you are avoiding my question.”

I sigh knowing he is very right. “You are my first boyfriend,” I murmur at the table.

“So no relationships before me,” he asks, reaching for my chin and lifting my face to look at him.

“No,” I shake my head.

“That is so hard to believe as gorgeous as you are. Can I ask why? I mean I understand you have reservations on letting people in, but you never found someone the least bit attractive?”

I exhale; I will have to do this sooner or later if I want to really give this a chance. The waitress appears again with our drinks giving me time to think of the best way to answer this.

“I was sixteen when I lost my parents. Before that I spent so much time with my music and with Linc that I really didn’t think about boys. I had a crush or two,” I look up nervously with my next words. “I had a crush on Chris for a little while but he broke my heart and then my parents died a few days later.”

Nolan tenses and narrows his eyes at me. That is the reaction I was afraid of. He searches my face for a moment before reaching to push a hair away from my face.

“It was a stupid crush and a stupid misunderstanding at a really bad time in my life. We’ve talked about it and I am completely over it now,” I add quietly.

“What happened,” Nolan asks.

“With Chris?”

“With everything,” he asks.

“It was a party at my house. Chris had been drinking and he kissed me. I was just happy he was looking at me that way and not like a little sister. He passed out shortly after the kiss and I was embarrassed about the whole thing and found Mandy to let her know he had passed out. They called you and you came to pick them up while I hid in my room.

“The next day at school Chris pretended nothing happened and started to avoid me. Two days later I was called to the office. The principle and the counselor told me that my parents were in a plane crash. I broke down and shut everyone out. Linc was the only one that was able to get through to me, because he was just there. He didn’t push and didn’t expect anything from me. He was just there.

“I stopped making music and wouldn’t go near the studio because it all just reminded me of my dad. I was a daddy’s girl. Not having him around hurt too much to explain. I never wanted to have another man in my life that would leave me like that again. I just felt like – like if he loved me as much as he said he would never have left me. I know that sounds silly and that he didn’t walk out of my life but it still hurt,” I wipe at the tears with my napkin and Nolan pulls me closer to him.

“It’s not silly. I think I understand what you mean. I won’t pretend to understand what it is like to lose my world all at once like that but I was a lot older than Mandy and Chris when we lost our mom and it was really hard.”

Our food comes and we are silent for a while. Nolan looks to be in deep thought for a while before he wipes his mouth and sits back. I look at him bracing myself for his next words.

“So you had a crush on Chris,” he says.

I had a feeling he was not going to let that pass. “Yeah, it was no big deal. He was my best friend’s older brother that I had something in common with.”

“So is this thing with you and me like that,” Nolan asks looking me squarely in the eyes.

“No, this is nothing like that. And I sure do hope you aren’t going to pretend you never kissed me.”

“Baby, I plan to wear out my welcome on those pretty little lips of yours,” he laughs and bends to nip at my lips.

“I don’t think you can ever wear out your welcome here,” I breathe.

He goes back to eating this time asking less complicated questions. We talk a little about his mom and dad. Things he remembers about his mom and the stuff he wishes Mandy and Chris could remember. We get into music and the conversation becomes really relaxed.

We are laughing about some of the names the band went through before they settled on
True Life
when Linc walks up to our table. Nolan’s face twists like he smells something funny but he stays quiet once Linc arrives.

“You ready kiddo. Thought we could get a head start,” Linc smiles at me.

“I guess,” I say looking up at Nolan questioningly.

Nolan leans in crushing his lips to mine as if it is our last kiss. He drinks from my mouth pulling a moan from deep inside me. I feel a warmth in my belly I’ve never felt before. I have my fingers clenching his t-shirt tightly.

“I’ll be waiting for you,” he murmurs into my ear and stands so I can get out of the booth.

CHAPTER Eleven

I
t feels great to be riding with Linc. It has been too long. His brother crashing his bike had put an end to our Saturday morning rides. This is me and Linc. We don’t have to talk, pretend or be anything other than who we are. Linc had taught me how to ride in hopes I would find a new love when I wouldn’t dare to think about music.

We always make up this way. We go for a ride and Linc treats me to ice cream to make up for whatever needs fixing. We are ripping through exits letting the road take our problems away and I realize I haven’t been this happy in a really long time.

Things feel like they are about to fall into place with Linc and things with Nolan are perfect. I have a boyfriend and I am sure I am falling for him. And my first love is back in my life, music. Things are turning out perfect.

Linc waves me toward the next rest stop and I signal to follow him off the road. I look to see I have about a half tank and can stand to fill up. Linc pulls into the gas station and pulls off his helmet looking back at me with a smile.

“Hey babe,” he calls back. “I got the gas you want to go get something to drink?”

“Sure,” I sing and swing off my bike.

When I come back out with two waters Linc is topping off my bike. I pass him the water and reach for my helmet. Linc reaches for my hand to stop me and I look up at him.

“Hey they have ice cream in that place,” he nods in the direction of the restaurant. “What do you say? We have a pretty good head start. You call Mandy and let her know we’ll catch up with them. I know where the guys decided to stop for the night.”

“Um…I guess, but let me text Rage first. I don’t want him to worry.”

“You guys are pretty serious huh,” Linc asks sadly.

“It’s getting that way. Yeah,” I say as gently as I can.

I take out my phone starting to text before this gets anymore awkward.

~B~

“Dude, you are whipped already,” Crush chuckles. “They are riding which means no talking, no contact. She is on her own bike. Relax.”

I have been sitting on the bus with a knot in my chest for the last two hours. I tried sleeping, watching movies, even joking with the guys has proved to be useless. I want my girl in my arms. I tried not to think about who she is with but I would be lying to say it doesn’t bother me.

“I hope you know I really am sorry Rage,” Mandy starts for the ninety-ninth time.

“Yeah, I got how sorry you are and for the record I am fine,” I grumble.

“Yeah sure, and I am volunteering to unload all by myself at the next gig,” Sleep laughs.

“Whatever,” I chuckle and throw a pillow at him.

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think you have anything to worry about,” Mitch says after swallowing back his beer.

“Right, exactly why I am not worried, can you all drop it,” I growl.

Just then my phone chirps with a text. I pull my phone out and smile when I see Kitty’s face. It is a pic I took one rehearsal when no one was looking. My smile fades fast when I read the text.

Kitty:
Stopping for ice cream. Hope that’s cool.

Me:
What happened to meeting up at rest stop?

Kitty:
Linc knows where the guys plan to call it a night. We’ll catch up to you guys soon.

Me:
Okay.

Kitty:
See you soon. I’ll be in your arms and your bed tonight. xoxo

I am not happy about them stopping somewhere but my girl knows me well. She said just what I needed to hear not to completely lose it. I have already talked my guilty sister into letting me take the bedroom with Kitty. I smile and text her back.

Me:
Can’t wait baby.

~B~

It is after midnight when we make it to the bus. The lights are out except for one light in the front of the bus which lets us know everyone is sleeping. We don’t want to wake anyone and Linc still wants to talk so we park the bikes and get comfortable using our bikes for seats.

“I miss this,” I said to Linc.

“Yeah, me too Kit,” he says warmly. His head is back as he looks up at the stars. He really is gorgeous. If I didn’t see him like a brother I am sure I would swoon from his good looks like everyone else.

“Are we okay?” I ask staring at his profile.

“I won’t lie and say my feelings miraculously changed but I think we are okay,” Linc says while searching my face.

“I didn’t think your feelings changed Linc. I just hoped that you were finally ready to except mine.”

“Why him Kit? I mean he is no different from me. You once said we can’t be together because of all the girls I’ve been with and you don’t think I can commit to you. He’s the lead singer in a band. I am sure he is getting as much as I am, so why him?”

“I don’t know Linc. He
is
different. I don’t know how to explain it but he just is. I know he probably has been with tons of girls but I – I want to try,” I try to explain.

“He doesn’t deserve you Kit, he is going to hurt you, babe.”

“Don’t Linc, don’t do this to me. I want to trust him, I want to try, please don’t do this,” I plead.

“Has he shown you he is worth trusting?” Linc asks with more heat than I expect. “I have, I have shown you over and over that you can trust me Kit. Has he?”

“Linc, is this why you came here? If it is then you can turn back and go home. I need a friend not someone that is going to make me feel like I am making the biggest mistake of my life by finally falling in love with someone,” I bark out at him.

Linc blinks back at me a few times like I have smacked him across the face. He gets up off his bike and comes closer to me. I don’t move fast enough to keep him from trapping me. I cross my arms over my chest. The night has gotten cooler and I didn’t wear a jacket. Linc lifts my face to look up at him.

“You’re in love with him,” Linc asks as he searches my face.

I shrug my shoulders and pull my face away. “I’m falling,” I say softly.

Linc sighs and places his forehead to the side of my face. “Okay, Kit, I’m sorry. I’ll back off. I just want to see you happy,” Linc exhales noisily and kisses the top of my head.

“I think I better go inside. It’s late and we have our first stop. I should get some sleep,” I murmur and push past him. He catches my arm and I turn.

“We’re good Kit, I promise,” he says then releases me.

~B~

I heard their bikes come in almost twenty minutes ago. I don’t want to look like a stalker so I haven’t run outside. I want to give her the space she needs, but I am seconds off of rushing out there to see what is going on. The bus is eerily quiet with everyone else sleeping. 

I know I am not getting any sleep until my girl is in my arms like she promised. I trust Kitty, it is that douchebag I don’t trust. I see the way he looks at her. He thinks somehow she’s his and he could never be so wrong. I appreciate that he was there for her during a time where she really needed someone but that was then and this is now. Now, Kitty has me and she is mine.

I punch the pillow and growl. That’s when I hear the noise coming from the front of the bus. A few moments later Kitty pushes the door open gently and closes it back. She is trying to be as quiet as she can as she pulls off her boots and wiggles out of her jeans. Instead of going to get some of her things to put on she picks up the t-shirt I had worn earlier and tossed.

Once she is in my shirt she climbs under the covers with her back to me. I think about just letting her fall asleep until I hear her sniffling. All I can think about is that jerk with his hands on my girl.

“What’s wrong baby,” I whisper into her ear as I wrap her in my arms.

“Nothing, I’m fine go back to sleep,” she replies.

“Baby, I am not going to sleep with you crying. Tell me what’s wrong,” I say losing my patience.

“It’s nothing Rage,” she says coolly.

“Yeah baby, it is something when you are calling me Rage and now you sound pissed at me.”

“I sound pissed because I don’t want to talk about it Nolan, please.”

“Fine, you don’t want to talk to me about it. I can go out there and beat it out of the person I am sure is behind the reason,” I growl and flung the covers off.

“Nolan stop,” she calls, jumps from the bed and stands in front of me. “It’s nothing. It’s over and I really just want to go to bed. Can you just hold me and make me feel safe and happy, because that is what I need Nolan, please baby.”

I puff out the anger running through me as I search her face in the light from the TV. I wipe the tears that are still spilling over. I’ll kick that jerks ass later, right now she comes first. I lean down lifting her in my arms. She wraps her legs around my waist and buries her face in my neck. Climbing back in bed I lie on my back and pull the covers over us as she curls into my chest.

“Thank you,” she sniffles into my neck.

“Anytime baby, I’m here when you are ready to talk,” I kiss the top of her head and hold her until her breathing evens out, rubbing circles on her back.