Secrets in the Lyrics (8 page)

Okay, I’m too old to be feeling like the giddy school girl that has finally gotten
the attention of her crush.  Here I am, though, feeling like I’m alive for the first
time in months.  Even being sore and bruised from Chad attacking me last night, I
still feel good.  Gable makes me feel safe.  I don’t know what spurred Chad to attack
me last night, other than being a horrible person, but the guys have assured me on
this bus ride that he was arrested and is in jail. 

Here we are, rolling into Birmingham.  I walk back to the bedroom and gather my things
to take to the hotel room.  I feel hands slip around my waist.  I texted ahead and
let them know that our band would only need two rooms tonight.

“How are we going to explain that?   They know we always get three rooms. Mine, yours,
and those two.”

He nuzzles into my neck.  “I told them I was staying with some local friends tonight. 
If anyone asks later, I’ll say that my plans fell through.  Hell, we all stay on the
same bus together, and we’re adults.  It’s really none of their damn business.”  I
lean my head further over to give him better access to my neck.  I feel his crotch
hardening against my ass. 

“Alright you two. We’re okay with this, but you can’t fuck right in front of us.”

Gable grunts at Stoney standing in the doorway.  “We aren’t fucking, man. Although,
if you don’t get the hell out of here, we may just put on a damn show for you.”

Stoney storms out of the room, grumbling about us being
assholes
. 

I pop Gable on his arm. “Don’t say shit like that.  I’m not putting on some sort of
exhibition for anyone.  Plus, just because they’ve given us the go ahead, I’m just
not there yet.  You know?”

He nods.  “Yeah, I do.  I was just bullshitting.  If he hadn’t walked in here and
started trying to bust my balls, nothing else would’ve been said.”

“I know, it’s just still a little weird for me.  Okay?”

He kisses me on the lips. “Yeah, babe.  It’s okay if you wanna keep me as your dirty
little secret.”

I punch him in the arm.  “Asshole.  Trust me, you aren’t anywhere near the dirty secrets
I have.”  With that said, I walk out of the room.

It’s true, I really wonder if he knew all of the secrets I have, if he’d still be
interested in me at all.  I make my way to sit in front of the TV until we arrive
at the hotel.

As soon as we enter the hotel room, Gable grabs me by my hips and I laugh.  “You do
know we have plenty of time, right?”

He strips my t-shirt over my head.  “Yes, but I want to use all the time.”  He leans
down, kissing my chest above my breast line.  “Look, the guys know about us, and we
aren’t having to sneak around.  I just feel like it’s perfect and in my life, if it’s
perfect, it can be snatched away.  I just don’t want to waste any time.”

I nod breathlessly.  “Sure, I get it.”

~*~*~

Standing under the stream of hot water pouring over me, I relax.  I hear the bathroom
door open and Gable speak.  “Hey, you want company?”

I shake my head.  That boy never ceases to amaze me.  “If you get in here, we won’t
make it to the show.  I’m almost done and then you can get in.”

He sticks his head in the curtain.  “I guess you have a point, because if I join you,”
he shakes his head.  “I won’t want to leave.”

I turn off the water and step out.  “Stop looking at me like that, you perv.”

“Right now I want to lick all that water off of you.”

I wrap my towel tighter.  “Well, you’re just goin’ to have to wait.”  I laugh as he
strips down and jumps in the shower.

I hear my phone ringing as I walk out in the room.  Looking down, it’s from an unknown
number.  “Hello.”

It’s a recording letting me know that I’m receiving a call from an inmate at a federal
prison.  Knowing it’s my dad, I accept the charges.

“Ivie.”

“Yes, Dad.”

“How are you doing?’

“I’m doing fine.  What’s up?”

“I was calling to check on you.”

“Why?  You haven’t called just to check on me in years.  Normally you need money for
your account.”

“Well, not this time.  I heard you were having some troubles.”

I shake my head.  “What are you talking about?”

“Well, that last boyfriend you had-”

I cut him off.  “How did you know about Chad?”

“Look, there were some people asking about him.  Then they put the word out that you
weren’t to be messed with.  I heard that he didn’t follow the rules.”

“How did you hear all of this?”

“Don’t worry about that.  Look, I know I’ve been a shitty father, but just watch your
back.  He’s a desperate man now.”

“He’s in jail, so I’m not worried.”  I hear the shower shut off.  “Look, I appreciate
the concern, but I have to get ready for a show.”

“Yes, I heard your band was doing really well.”

I shake my head, annoyed.  “Really.  Well, how is it that you know more about my life
while you’re in prison than when I was living under the same roof with you?”

“Ivie.  Like I said, I know I’ve been a shitty parent.  I’m sorry.  Look, you get
ready for your show.  Take care.”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, and Ivie?  I love you.”

Complete shock is how I would describe the feeling.  “A- yeah- you, too.”

I hang up the phone, confused about many things.  I’ll wait until after the show and
talk to Gable about it.  I can’t help but think about the fact that when we are in
Hilton Head in a few days, we won’t be far from where he’s doing his time.

“Hey, babe.”  His kisses my neck.  “Were you talking to someone?”

“Yeah.  My dad called.”

“What in the hell did he want?”

“We’ll just talk about it after the show, I need to get ready.  Plus, I’m not sure
I’m ready to rehash it.”

He nods, knowing that I’m done talking at the moment.

             
“Okay, well let’s get ready.”

I don’t know what her dad said to her, but she’s quiet.  When Ivie is quiet, it gets
scary.  She withdraws from everyone and everything.  Her dad calling and Chad showing
back up doesn’t feel like a coincidence. 
Shit. Did I fuck up by bringing Cade into this?

My mind is racing, even after the show.  I can’t wait to get her back to the room
and talk to her.  I know her dad is in prison just north of Hilton Head.  Does he
want her to come see him or something? 

We bid our good nights to Keeg and Stoney as the driver drops us off at the hotel. 
I’m sure they are on their way out to hit up the clubs and find some ass.

“Do you wanna order a pizza or something?”  I ask as we walk through the door.

“If you find a place that can bring me a salad.”

“You just sweated off like a million calories, and I know I’ll work some more off
of you before the night is over.  You need food, not garnishes.”

“I can’t keep eating like I am, I’ll gain all of my weight back.”

I step in front of her.  “I’m going to tell you this one time.  I don’t care if you
do gain it back.  I was happy with you just the way you were.”

She rolls her eyes.  “Yeah, whatever.”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

She walks over to the sofa and drops down.  “Just that you say that, but you didn’t
seem to pay much attention to me before I lost the weight is all.”

“That’s bullshit.  Just because I didn’t make a move on you, doesn’t mean I wasn’t
thinking about it.” I flop down next to her.  “Honestly.  I’ve had a fucking hard
on for you since I was seventeen.  I’m just tired of ignoring it.”  I grab her hand
as she’s trying to not look me in the face.  “Now, I’m going to order a fucking pizza
and some beer.  Then, you are going to tell me what the fuck is going on.”

She goes to the bathroom and I order the pizza, some wings, beer and a little side
salad for her.  I’m fucking starving after a show, but maybe the salad will make her
eat.  She can eat some other food with it.

When she comes out of the bathroom, she’s in her sleep shorts and tank.

“Hey, food is coming.”

“Look, I’m tired and I want to sleep.”

“Damn it.  Ivie, if you don’t tell me what’s going on, I’m gonna spank your ass until
you can’t sit down.”

“Fuck you!”

“Yeah, I’m kinda hoping that’s going to happen.  Until then, tell me what your dad
said because this…” I point to the frown she has on her face.  “Isn’t working for
me.”

She sighs.  “Fine.”

She starts relaying her conversation with her dad, and I realize, yep, I have to come
clean.

Once she stops talking, there is a knock at the door.  I stand up and get our delivery. 
Setting it down between us, we start chowing down.  As I suspected, she’s hungrier
than she tried to make me believe. 

After I finish off the last beer of the six pack, I put my hand on hers.  “Ivie, I
need to talk to you about something.”

She looks up at me, lost.  “O-kay.”

I take my time, carefully explaining my conversation with Cade. 

“Gable, I- I just really don’t know what to say.  I don’t know whether to be angry
or to be somewhat relieved.”

“Babe, I wanted to do whatever I could to keep you safe.”

“I know this is going to sound strange, but I think when we get to Hilton Head tomorrow,
I wanna go up and see my dad.”

I nod.  “Okay, I’ll go with you.  Well, if you want me to.”

She nods.  “Yeah, I think I’m going to need you.”

I kiss her forehead.  “Hey, baby I’m here for whatever you need.”

“Oh shit.  Isn’t your sister coming in?”

“Yeah, but not tomorrow, it’s Thanksgiving.  Ryder is telling her tomorrow night and
they’ll come in on Friday.”

“Okay.  Can we just go to sleep tonight?”

“Baby, I want to be with you.  Whether it’s sleeping or fucking, I want to be with
you.”

She curls up on the bed and I slide in behind her, rolling her over so that she is
curled into my side, with her head in my chest.  I switch the lamp off.  Tomorrow
is going to be a long day.

“Gable?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for saying you’ll go with me tomorrow.  I’m really nervous about this.”

“Babe, how long has it been since you’ve seen your dad?”

“The last time I actually visited him, I was fifteen, I think.  He told me I needed
to make better grades.  The last time I talked to him was about six months ago, he
needed money for his account and none of his
friends
would send it to him.”

I’m angry.  “He said you needed to make better grades?  You were a fucking genius
in school.”

She tenses.  “How did you know that?”

Shit, I forgot. 
“One of the times that we were moving you, your transcript fell out.  We looked at
it.  Sorry.”

“It’s nothing, I shouldn’t get upset about it.  It was just after he told me that,
I let my grades tank.  It pissed me off because he was telling me to do better when
I was doing the best.  He didn’t really know and he didn’t really care.”

I pull her in tight.  “Well, he was an idiot, and it’s his loss for not being a part
of your life.”

             
“I never understood what I did to them.  Why they couldn’t just love me.”

             
“Baby, I understand, kinda.  I mean, why did my dad have to be such a douche and have
two, possibly more, wives now?  Why did my mom have to be such a push over?  I honestly
worry that she would take him back if he showed up tomorrow.”

             
“Our parents have really done a number on us, huh?”

             
“Yeah, babe.  Let’s get some sleep, you have a big day tomorrow if you still want
to go.”

             
“Yeah, I still want to go.  I need to face him.”

             
I sigh and pull her into me so we can sleep.