Tethered (6 page)

Our coffee was quickly brought
to us, and I dumped in some cream and sugar, thinking I could at least mask the dirt taste with filler items. I took a sip and realized that wasn’t the case, but stomached it anyway and smiled happily as I cringed heavily on the inside.

“So, where are you from
? Have you always lived in Los Angeles?” Tom asked as he fiddled with a sugar packet.

“No, I’m from San Diego, but I just couldn’t stand it down there any longer
. I know Los Angeles isn’t
that
much of a difference, but it’s better than being stuck down there where it’s even hotter.”

“Yeah, I’m from San Francisco, but moved down here to get into the warmth
. That and I really didn’t want to be around home anymore. I miss it, but I’m glad I decided to move away and have to rely on myself instead of my parents. My brother is so dependent on them that it makes me glad I was able to get out and become my own person.

“Do you have a large family?” I asked.

“No, just my brother and me. I have a couple cousins, although they live in Minnesota, so I never really get to see them except for their pictures online.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” I said as I neatly folded a straw wrapper that was left on the table from the previous patrons.

The noise went silent, with each second passing by resonating in my head as I tried to think of something, anything, to say to him to keep the conversation going. It was so easy at the party, and now it felt as though I was scrambling to say anything to him. I saw him look out the window, a few cars whizzing by, and I almost felt the same awkwardness that reflected off his face. Both of us were at a loss for words, and that felt like a dangerous thing to have happen on our first time out together.

“I’m sorry this is awkward
. I really don’t go out with a lot of girls, and I’m not sure what to do,” Tom said with a chuckle, as if he was embarrassed to admit it.

“No, don’t be sorry
. I haven’t been out in years, and I’m just as much to blame.”

“How are you kids doing?” the waitress asked, startling me.

“We’re good, but could we get the check when you have a chance?” Tom asked.

I put my head down
, feeling a little sad, for I almost felt as though my demeanor and the lack of talking was so bad that he couldn’t wait to get out of here.

“Don’t worry
. I’m not ending this because of something you did. I just remembered that I have to take my dog out, so I should probably get you home before he pees all over my floor again.”

“You have a dog
? What kind?” I asked with a smile, as I was relieved I wasn’t some kind of guy repeller.

“Shetland Sheepdog
. His name is Chop.”

“Aw, so cute
. I don’t know many people around here with pets.”

“Yeah, I brought him from home
. My parents got him for me when I was ten, which is why he is named Chop,” Tom said with a chuckle. “I thought it was so cool at the time, but now I’m starting to regret my cool choice.”

“Oh come now it isn’t that bad
. Besides, a cool and tough name scares people.”

The waitress brought the check
, took away our cups, and Tom laid out a ten dollar bill for her, which was generous considering the coffee was only three dollars total. My mom always told me that it was a great sign when a man tipped well and was kind to service people. It showed that he was a gentle man and appreciated hard work and dedication. I never really paid attention to her when she went on about it, but now I was starting to see what she meant.

“What direction do you live
? I’d like to walk you home,” Tom said as we walked out the front entrance.

“I’d like that
. I don’t live too far from here, just off University Boulevard.”

“Almost sucks it’s not f
arther away. I would’ve loved to be with you longer,” he said, almost knowing exactly what to tell me to make me swoon for him.

•••

“This is my place,” I said as we stopped in front of my apartment, which from what I could see looked empty. I guess Morgan either went home with that guy or was still there dancing away.

A few people passed us looking like they were going home, as they stumbled around
with the backs of their dresses hiked up, showing everything underneath.

Tom and I walked up the steps and stopped in front of my door
.

“I really had a good time tonight
. I’m happy I decided to go out,” I said.

“Me
, too. When will I see you again?” he asked.

“Well, we have class next week together.”

“Yeah, but I was hoping to see you before then,” Tom said, his voice changing and making me realize that he actually wanted to take me out.

My cheeks
heated, not from him saying that to me, but from the realization that I was a complete idiot. I might as well have gotten that soda at the diner, for I knew I looked like a naïve and childish person.

“Oh, y
eah, we could do that,” I said as my voice cracked.

“How about Sunday
? Maybe we could go out and do something? I could come pick you up, we could get dressed up, and see what happens from there?” Tom asked.

“That sounds perfect,” I said with a smile.

“I’ll be here Sunday at seven then,” he said before leaning in and kissing me softly, yet firmly, on the cheek.

I smiled, he smiled, and then
he turned away and walked down the steps as I stood there floating from the butterflies in my stomach. There was something different about Tom. He wasn’t like Kurt at all, and while that was a good thing, I was hoping it wasn’t also a bad thing. I knew that only time would tell, but I was praying that giving him this attention was the right choice.

Tom disappeared into the darkness and I walked in the front door of my apartment, where I was left with the silence of my thoughts
. I popped off my heels, pulled my shirt out of my skirt, and wiped off all of my makeup before jumping in bed and opening my laptop.

I went to MingleCam to check my messages, which were completely full, but I didn’t open them for some reason I couldn’t muster up
. This profession didn’t seem too appealing now, whether that was from me being tired, happy from my makeshift date, or the fact that getting naked for a bunch of strangers just didn’t do it for me any longer. I was going to move onto better things, and the thought of starting something new was thrilling.

With all of the new things quickly happening in my life, I just hope
d they didn’t fall through and I was left trying to pick up the sharp pieces.

Chapter Six

I had looked forward to Sunday night since Tom
had dropped me off. It was going to be my first real, formal date, and I was beyond thrilled to be having it with somebody like Tom. He was cute, sweet, and just overall a great guy. Kurt hadn’t contacted me yet, which I took as a sign from the heavens that I was meant to move on and just get on with my life. Kurt was such a dangerous and toxic person, and even though he was beyond sexy and kinky, I knew I needed to take something safer…at least so I thought.

As I ran around the house, grabbing my shoes, earrings, and perfume, Morgan watched me closely, as if she were taking notes
.

“Why are you staring at me?” I asked as I put my hand on the couch to stabilize myself as I slipped my shoes on.

“I want to say I knew where I was when this moment happened,” she said.

“Moment
? What moment?”

“The moment you meet the man you’re going to marry.”

“Oh shut up. It’s just a carefree and playful date. It’s not like we’re going to start dating or something.”

“I’m just saying, if you want to go home with him tonight, I won’t judge
. I totally wouldn’t blame you.”

“Morgan, I’m not a slut,” I said nervously, as the thoughts of what I did with Kurt plagued my mind.

“It’s not slutty! Besides, with all you do, you definitely need to get it in.”

A knock came swiftly to the door, thankfully
ending the conversation Morgan and I were having.

“This conversation is over,” I said
somewhat sternly, as I hoped Tom didn’t hear her through the door.

I took a deep breath, turned the handle, and opened the door to the sight of Tom standing there, all dressed up, and smili
ng from ear to ear as he held a single red rose in his hand.

“Hey
, Chloe,” he said nervously, as a few beads of sweat formed on his brow.

“You look really nice
. I wish I would’ve known so I could’ve dressed up more.”

“No, you look beautiful,” he said as he looked me up and down
. “I got this for you.”

He handed me the red rose, a few leaves and thorns on the stem, and I grabbed it before placing it upon my nose and feeling the fragrant smell waft up into my nose and tickle the little hairs inside.

“It’s beautiful,” I said with a smile as my cheeks probably turned as red as the rose itself.

“Just like you,” Tom retorted.

“Aw, so cute,” Morgan said.

I turned around, gave her a stern look, and she
shifted the other way as she knew I meant business.

“Can you put this in water for me?” I asked Morgan.

“Yeah, I’ll take care of it,” she said before getting up and taking it from me.

“I’ll be back later,” I said as I grabbed my keys from a table near the door.

“You can keep her overnight if you want, Tom,” she yelled from the kitchen as she filled a small vase with water.

Tom chuckled nervously, as he had nothing to retort back
. I wanted to apologize, but I was sure deep down he was glad Morgan said that. After all, he was a college guy, a good-looking one at that, and I knew he had to have a raging sex drive that needed to be quenched, even though he was chivalrous and polite.

I shoved my keys in
to my purse, shut the door, and smiled nervously as I tried to act as if Morgan hadn’t said a word.

“So, where are we going?” I asked as we walked down my front steps and stood on the sidewalk.

“I thought dinner and a movie would be too cliché and boring. There’s a carnival in town not too far from here. I’ve been to it in the past and it’s really fun, and not some hole-in-the-wall place. If you’d like, I’d like to take you there,” he said.

“I would love that,” I said with a smile.

“Great,” he replied before we left my apartment and walked to the carnival.

•••

“Welcome to Southern California’s most premier and beautiful carnival. See all of the magnificent artifacts from all over the world before you ride The Trizzle, an upside-down thrill ride that will rush all of the blood to your head!” the ticket master, a man in a red pinstripe suit and top hat, said with gusto as we approached the ticket booth.

“This is great
. Two tickets please,” Tom said with a smile.

“Two tickets for the young couple coming right up
.” The man tore off two tickets and slid them over the counter.

Tom handed him ten dollars, which I thought was a good value for what I could actually see inside the gates
. There were rides, exhibits, and those fun, yet impossible to win carnival games that the workers were really trying to sell to each person that passed by.

Tom grabbed the tickets and we walked up to the
turnstile, where a man took the tickets and stamped our hands with a red logo of their carnival. As we walked through, I could smell corn dogs, funnel cakes, and every deep-fried candy bar known to man. Turkey legs hung from metal hooks as little kids scarfed down foot-long hot dogs. I was beginning to think that this was the most American carnival in the country.

“What do you want to do first?” Tom asked.

“You said you’ve been here before, right? Is there anything you’d recommend?” I asked, as all of the flashing lights and loud noises caused me sensory overload.

“Well, we could ride the Viking swing
. It doesn’t go upside down or anything, but it’s pretty fun.”

“
Sounds good to me,” I replied with a smile.

Tom guided me through the crowd until we got near this Viking swing
. It was big, and I was terrified. A huge Viking ship set on a pendulum swung back and forth, high in the air, with no real restraints of any kind in place. I took a big gulp, then a deep breath, and mustered up the courage to look brave and walk onto the ride with him.

We had our own row
to ourselves, as only about ten other people were on the ride with us. The operator waited for any last minute stragglers, and I kept wiping my clammy and sweaty palms on my pants so I could hold onto the railing in front of us better.

“Hang on to your seats
, ladies and gentlemen,” the operator said as he shut the gate and turned on the ride.

It slowly began to move,
as if swaying the ocean current, as it picked up speed and swung back and forth, higher and higher. The wind blew through my hair, each scent from corn dogs to funnel cakes tickling my senses as I tried to focus on the seats in front of me and not at the swinging landscape all around us.

“Are you okay?” Tom asked as we hit full speed and swing.

“I…I think so,” I said as my hands began to get red from squeezing the metal bar so tightly.

“Give me your hand,” he said.

I hesitantly let go with my right hand and Tom immediately grabbed it, making me feel even safer than when I was holding onto the bar. I smiled, butterflies filling my stomach, as I tried not to act like such a little schoolgirl. He was cute, and the fact that he wanted to hold my hand when I was scared made me truly believe he was a good choice. Kurt probably wouldn’t have even noticed I was scared, and would have told me to just suck it up if I did say something. Tom, however, actually cared about how I felt. Sure, he wasn’t as crazy or daring as Kurt, but he was safe. I knew he would always be there, and that my feelings wouldn’t get hurt, at least so I thought, when I was with him. He was a vanilla choice, secure, and somebody I knew who wouldn’t use and abuse me. Even through all of that, even with all of the good vibes and security, I wondered if vanilla was a good enough flavor for me. Sometimes a girl wanted some chocolate syrup and sprinkles with her ice cream, and Kurt was the flavoring that I craved, even though I knew it was bad for me.

After a few minutes, the ride began to slow down and my racing heart began to beat slower like it had before this ride
. It was over, and I wasn’t flung out like a sack of potatoes. Not only that, but I was still holding Tom’s hand, and neither of us had any reason to let go.

“That was fun,” I said, trying to hide my fear.

“You looked pretty scared back there,” he said with a smile, as if he were lightly teasing me.

“I was not!” I said as we stood to get off the ride.

“It’s okay if you were. I’ll admit that I was a little scared once we hit full speed. I was almost convinced we’d be flung out.”

“Really
? Okay, maybe I was a little scared,” I admitted as we walked off the platform and felt the soft and safe grass beneath us.

“I knew it,” he said with a laugh.

I gave him a dirty look, although playful, and he responded by putting his arm around my shoulder and continued to laugh at my confession.

“Are you hungry at all
? I think all of that swinging made me crave something,” he said.

“I could go for something,” I replied.

Truthfully, after all of that nauseous swinging, I wasn’t hungry for anything. In fact, I’d rather not have to smell all of this food, for I could feel my taco lunch churning inside my stomach as I tried to keep them down. Usually I would’ve said something, but this date was going so well, and I didn’t want to make him think he couldn’t enjoy this date too.

Tom and I walked over to the food cart and truck area of the carnival, which was lined with at least two dozen trucks, all serving different things from hot dogs and burgers, to falafels and gyros
. There were lines at each cart, and Tom picked one, an American food stand, which I was more than happy with.

We walked up, his arm still around me, and began to order from a balding, greasy, and overweight man in a stained
-white shirt. I wanted to ask to see his sanitation and food service permits, but I figured if he was serving here, he must have everything in line…or at least I hoped.

“What can I get ya?” he asked as he scratched his gut through his shirt.

“I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger with fries and a cola,” Tom said to the man.

“And what about you?” he asked me.

“I’ll just have a diet cola and a basket of fries,” I said, my stomach not permitting me to have any more.

Tom handed him ten dollars, getting two back, which he left in a tip jar on the counter
. I didn’t think this man really needed a tip, unless it was to take a shower, but I knew Tom just did it to make himself more attractive, just like at the diner.

“Al
l right, I’ll have it out to you in a few minutes,” he said as he turned around to make the food.

Tom and I sat on an older wooden picnic table, which had names carved into it, with the screws squeaking as we sat down.

“I hope you’re having a good time. I really had a tough time coming up with something to do tonight. I don’t really go on dates, so I’m not that good at this type of thing,” Tom said.

“I’m having a great time,” I replied with a smile
. “It’s very outside of the box, and I like it when guys think outside of the box.”

A few minutes went by and our food hadn’t been brought out yet
. I could see and smell it cooking, which was amazing considering there were so many smells in the area, and our conversation had pretty much ended, until Tom brought up a subject I was hoping I’d be able to avoid.

“So, I’ve been thinking a lot, and quite frankly, I like you
. I know this is only our second date, if you call the other day a date, but I think you’re really nice, sweet, and just a great girl. I’ve been wondering, since we haven’t talked about it much, are you seeing or talking to anyone else? It’s cool if you are, I get it, it’s college and everything, but I guess I would just sleep better at night if I knew if I had to compete with somebody,” Tom said.

“Al
l right, kids, here you go,” the chef said as he set the food down in front of us and walked away, snorting up a loogie and spitting it into a trash can.

In the few seconds I had before I had to answer him, I tried to think of what I should even say
. There was Kurt, but we were far from a thing. I was probably overthinking this right now, but what if something happened and Tom found out about him? After all, Morgan and a bunch of other people knew I went out with Kurt, so it could be thought or argued that we had a great time and were talking to each other on the side. Tom was such a great guy, and I wanted to say I was completely single and available, but I wasn’t sure if that was the absolute truth.

“I used to talk to someone not too far back, but that’s over with now,” I replied, not telling the truth, but not exactly lying either.

“How come things ended, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Shit
. I knew this was a bad idea. I was a horrible liar, and Tom had to be seeing right through me. I was starting our relationship foundation on cards, and now this house was tumbling over.

“Well, he just wasn’t mature enough
. He’s really self-absorbed and cocky, and I just couldn’t handle it any longer, so I broke things off.”