The African Safari Discovery (4 page)

Chapter 7
The Flat Skull

“I present to you,” thundered Dr. Fallows in the dim light of his tent, “the flat skull of Rufiji!”

Stanley, Arthur, and Mr. Lambchop all gasped.

The skull was flattened the wrong way!

Instead of being flat the way Stanley was flat—front and back—its edge was down the middle. Dr. Fallows turned the skull sideways, and Stanley could see right in one eye socket and out the other.

Nobody spoke for a long while.

Arthur shook his head. “Look at its teeth,” he said almost to himself. Stanley saw that they were very small and jagged.

“That’s not a person,” Arthur said suddenly.

“Not anymore!” beamed Dr. Fallows.

“It’s a big fish!”

At once, Stanley could see that his brother was right.

Dr. Fallows rotated the skull in his hand. Something changed in his eyes, and he swung around to his assistant. “You fool!” he cried. “Of course this is a fish! How dare you suggest otherwise!” With a grunt, he flung the skull out of the tent.

Stanley’s eyes welled up with tears, and he ran from the scene.

“Stanley!”

Mr. Lambchop and Arthur found Stanley where he had folded himself at the edge of the jungle. “Stanley, what’s wrong?”

Arthur kneeled down. “What is it, Stanley?”

Finally, Stanley lifted his wet face and wiped it with the back of his hands.

“It’s just that . . .” He let out a heavy sigh. “We came all this way, and . . . I didn’t find out anything about . . . about why I’m flat.” His voice broke, and his face crinkled into a sob.

“Stanley.” His father squeezed his shoulder. “Don’t you see? These last few days have been the most remarkable of my entire life.”

“It’s the best vacation ever,” said Arthur.

“What a time we’ve had! We jumped from a plane and went on a safari. We met Masai tribesmen and canoed through deepest Africa. And it’s all because of you.”

A smile crept across Stanley’s face. “We
have
had a lot of fun,” he admitted.

“I wouldn’t trade any of it,” said Mr. Lambchop. “Except maybe for a new paddle.”

Stanley chuckled as his father and brother wrapped him in a hug.

“We’re glad you’re flat, Stanley,” Arthur said.

Surrounded by his family, Stanley thought of the long-necked giraffe on the plains, surrounded by all the other animals. They liked having him around. He helped them to see farther.

Chapter 8
A Souvenir

At the airport in America, Harriet Lambchop shrieked with excitement when Stanley, Arthur, and their father came through the door at
ARRIVALS
. She ran up and threw her arms around Stanley.

“How I missed you!” she cried. She squeezed Stanley’s edges. “You’ve lost weight!”

“How’s my little explorer?” She ruffled Arthur’s hair.

“We saw an elephant!” said Arthur.

Then she spun and gazed into Mr. Lambchops eyes. They kissed deeply.

“Ew,” said Arthur. “We’re in
public
.”

Harriett said, “Wait until you see what I got for you!” She pulled two large, oddly shaped pillows out of shopping bags. She handed one to Arthur and one to Stanley.

The pillows looked like curved rain-drops.

“What is it?” said Arthur.

“I won them in the silent auction at the Grammar Society fund-raiser! That,” she said, pointing to Arthur’s, “is a crocheted comma. And yours, Stanley, is a single quotation mark!”

“What’s the difference?” asked Arthur.

Mrs. Lambchop blinked. “Proper usage, of course!”

Back at home, Stanley stood in front of his enormous bulletin board. It was dotted with souvenirs from his travels: a postcard from Calamity Jasper, a newspaper clipping from Canada, and photographs from Mexico and Japan. In his hands, he held the newspaper article that the Lambchops had carried with them on their African adventure:
FLAT SKULL DISCOVERED IN AFRICA
. It was crumpled and torn in several places, stained by water and mud, but it was still in one piece.

Stanley pinned it carefully to the bulletin board.

Arthur’s hand appeared beside Stanley’s. Arthur fiddled with a pushpin just above the newspaper article. Then he hung something on it.

It was the flat skull of Rufiji!

Stanley gasped. “How did— Where did you—”

“It was lying on the ground outside Dr. Fallows’s tent after you ran off.” Arthur grinned. “I figured you might want it—you know, to remind you who you really are.”

Stanley’s stomach fluttered as the skull swung gently on its pushpin. Then he noticed that Arthur had the comma pillow strapped to his back like a mane, and the quotation mark pillow curving up over his head. He’d pinned spots of dark fabric all over.

Arthur was a giraffe! He swept a blanket off his bed and held it out to Stanley. “Want to go on a safari in the laundry room?”

“Absolutely!” said Stanley. And together, the Lambchop boys headed off on another adventure.

Take a sneak peek at

FLAT STANLEY’S
WORLDWIDE ADVENTURES
Book No. 7

The Flying Chinese
Wonders

The fact that Stanley Lambchop was flat did not mean he enjoyed being treated like a poster.

Stanley trudged back and forth outside the school auditorium with a giant piece of cardboard taped to the front of his body. It read:

T
HE
F
LYING
C
HINESE
W
ONDERS

A C
HINESE
N
EW
Y
EAR
P
ERFORMANCE

FOR THE
W
HOLE
C
OMMUNITY

People streamed inside. A beefy boy from Stanley’s class called out, “Look, it’s the poster boy for flat kids!”

Stanley grimaced. He hoped no one else would notice him.

“Well, hello there, Stanley Lambchop!” It was Doctor Dan, whom Stanley had visited just after he was flattened. It wasn’t long ago that he’d woken up to find that his bulletin board had fallen on him in the middle of the night. “Helping out with the big performance, are we? Well, good for you for making positive use of an unusual condition!”

How embarrassing, Stanley thought.

After Doctor Dan left to take his seat, Stanley’s family appeared. “My little star!” squealed his mother, Harriet Lambchop.

Stanley tried to smile as she kissed the edge of his head.

His little brother, Arthur, rolled his eyes. “He’s not even
in the show,
Mom.”

“Now, Arthur,” Mrs. Lambchop said, “those behind the scenes are just as important as those onstage.”

“And nobody is behind the scenes like our Stanley.” Mr. Lambchop winked. Stanley sighed. He’d always liked being in plays. Now, all anyone wanted him to do was move the sets, because his shape made him hard to see when he crossed the stage.

“I’m not even moving scenery today,” Stanley grumbled.

“Why not?” asked Mr. Lambchop.

“Are you in charge of the giant pandas?” said Mrs. Lambchop hopefully. “They have always been my favorite wonders from China!”

“No.” Stanley pouted. “There aren’t any pandas. The spotlight blew a fuse, so . . ,” He held up a giant flashlight from behind his poster. “I have to hang upside down from the ceiling with this.”

“Hey, Stanley,” called his friend Carlos, who lived next door to the Lambchops. “Don’t break a leg!”

Stanley’s mother chuckled. “He means, ‘Break a leg,’ dear. That’s a common figure of speech in the theater. It means good luck!” Harriet Lambchop took great interest in the proper use of the English language.

“I don’t think so, Mom,” said Arthur. “I think Carlos meant, ‘Don’t fall from the ceiling and break your leg.’”

“Be quiet, Arthur,” huffed Stanley.

Once everyone was seated, Stanley took his place. He hung with his lower body rolled around a bar high over the crowd.

It’s not fair! he thought. Why do I have to save the day any time somebody needs something flat or flexible?

On the one hand, Stanley’s new shape allowed him to do lots of fun and exciting things, like fit between the walls of an Egyptian pyramid and be a cape in a Mexican bullfight. On the other hand, he was often asked to do uncomfortable, humiliating, and boring things that would never be expected of a rounded person. For instance, he had been rolled and tied to the back of a horse in South Dakota and on another trip he had been forced to ride with baggage in the cargo hold of an airplane to Africa.

Stanley didn’t want to hang high in the air holding a heavy flashlight. He didn’t even know what to expect onstage. The performers had arrived only moments before the show was about to begin.

The lights went down. With a sigh, Stanley lifted his flashlight and flicked it on as the curtains squeaked open.

In the center of the bare stage stood a teenage boy and girl. They wore matching red outfits.

“Lucky people of America!” A Chinese man in a tuxedo stepped onto the stage. “All the way from the People’s Republic of China, we bring to you . . . the Flying Chinese Wonders!”

A few people clapped as Stanley moved his spotlight back and forth between the two performers. They bowed slowly.

This is going to be even worse than I thought, figured Stanley.

Then, in a flash, the boy and girl shot into the air. Flipping high over the stage, they grabbed hands and flattened their bodies, spinning around each other like a sputtering propeller headed straight for the ground. Stanley held his breath as the human propeller spun faster and faster, its descent slowing until finally it hovered a few feet off the ground. They planted their feet and faced the audience with their arms raised in the air. The entire auditorium erupted with applause.

Stanley couldn’t believe it! The Flying Chinese Wonders were amazing! They swooped and sailed through the air. They twisted and flipped and spun like tops. Together, they became a dragon, a comet, and a fish on a trampoline. Sometimes, Stanley could not tell where the first Wonder began and the other ended.

Their bodies can do anything!
Stanley thought. His flashlight raced to keep up.

For their grand finale, the Flying Chinese Wonders connected head to toe, puffed out their chests to form a circle, and rolled around the stage. When they came to a stop, each held out an arm and a leg. The giant circle had become the sun.

It was the greatest thing Stanley had ever seen! He shouted, whooped, and clapped his—

Stanley’s heart plummeted as he watched the giant flashlight drop from his hands.

CRAAASH!

The Flying Chinese Wonders looked up in alarm. Their circle shook . . . and collapsed to the floor in a heap.