The Art of Seduction (54 page)

The emotions you are trying to arouse should be strong ones. Do not speak of friendship and disagreement; speak of love and hate. And it is crucial to try to feel something of the emotions you are trying to elicit. You will be more believable that way. This should not be difficult: imagine the reasons for loving or hating before you speak. If necessary, think of something from your past that fills you with rage. Emotions are contagious; it is easier to make someone cry if you are crying yourself. Make your voice an instrument, and train it to communicate emotion. Learn to seem sincere. Napoleon studied the greatest actors of his time, and when he was alone he would practice putting emotion into his voice.

The goal of seductive speech is often to create a kind of hypnosis: you are distracting people, lowering their defenses, making them more vulnerable to suggestion. Learn the hypnotist's lessons of repetition and affirmation, key elements in putting a subject to sleep. Repetition involves using
262 • The Art of Seduction

the same words over and over, preferably a word with emotional content:

"taxes," "liberals," "bigots." The effect is mesmerizing—ideas can be permanently implanted in people's unconscious simply by being repeated often enough. Affirmation is simply the making of strong positive statements, like the hypnotist's commands. Seductive language should have a kind of boldness, which will cover up a multitude of sins. Your audience will be so caught up in your bold language that they won't have time to reflect on whether or not it is true. Never say "I don't think the other side made a wise decision"; say "We deserve better," or "They have made a mess of things." Affirmative language is active language, full of verbs, imperatives, and short sentences. Cut out "I believe," "Perhaps," "In my opinion." Head straight for the heart.

You are learning to speak a different kind of language. Most people employ symbolic language—their words stand for something real, the feelings, ideas, and beliefs they really have. Or they stand for concrete things in the real world. (The origin of the word "symbolic" lies in a Greek word meaning "to bring things together"—in this case, a word and something real.) As a seducer you are using the opposite:
diabolic
language. Your words do not stand for anything real; their sound, and the feelings they evoke, are more important than what they are supposed to stand for. (The word "diabolic" ultimately means to separate, to throw things apart—here, words and reality.) The more you make people focus on your sweet-sounding language, and on the illusions and fantasies it conjures, the more you diminish their contact with reality. You lead them into the clouds, where it is hard to distinguish truth from untruth, real from unreal. Keep your words vague and ambiguous, so people are never quite sure what you mean. Envelop them in demonic, diabolical language and they will not be able to focus on your maneuvers, on the possible consequences of your seduction. And the more they lose themselves in illusion, the easier it will be to lead them astray and seduce them.

Symbol:
The Clouds. In the clouds it is hard to see

the exact forms of things. Everything seems vague;

the imagination runs wild, seeing things that are

not there. Your words must lift people into

the clouds, where it is easy for them

to lose their way.

Use the Demonic Power of Words to Sow Confusion • 263

Reversal

Do not confuse flowery language with seduction: in using flowery language you run the risk of wearing on people's nerves, of seeming pretentious. Excess verbiage is a sign of selfishness, of your inability to rein in your natural tendencies. Often with language, less is more; the elusive, vague, ambiguous phrase leaves the listener more room for imagination than does a sentence full of bombast and self-indulgence.

You must always think first of your targets, and of what will be pleasant to their ears. There will be many times when silence is best. What you do not say can be suggestive and eloquent, making you seem mysterious. In the eleventh-century Japanese court diary
The Pillow Book of Sei Shonagon,
the counselor Yoshichika is intrigued by a lady he sees in a carriage, silent and beautiful. He sends her a note, and she sends one back; he is the only one to read it, but by his reaction everyone can tell it is in bad taste, or badly written. It spoils the effect of her beauty. Shonagon writes, "I have heard people suggest that no reply at all is better than a bad one." If you are not eloquent, if you cannot master seductive language, at least learn to curb your tongue—use silence to cultivate an enigmatic presence.

Finally, seduction has a pace and rhythm. In phase one, you are cautious and indirect. It is often best to disguise your intentions, to put your target at ease with deliberately neutral words. Your conversation should be harmless, even a bit bland. In this second phase, you turn more to the attack; this is the time for seductive language. Now when you envelop them in your seductive words and letters, it comes as a pleasant surprise. It gives them the immensely pleasing feeling that they are the ones to suddenly inspire you with such poetry and intoxicating words.

Pay Attention to Detail

Lofty

words and grand

gestures can be suspi-

cious: why are you trying

so hard to please? The details

of a seduction
—
the subtle ges-

tures, the offhand things you do
—

are often more charming and

revealing. You must learn to distract

your victims with a myriad of pleasant

little rituals
—
thoughtful gifts tailored

just for them, clothes and adornments

designed to please them, gestures that

show the time and attention you are

paying them. All of their senses are

engaged in the details you orchestrate.

Create spectacles to dazzle their

eyes; mesmerized by what they

see, they will not notice what

you are really up to. Learn to

suggest the proper feelings

and moods through

details.

The Mesmerizing Effect

In December 1898, the wives of the seven major Western ambassadors to China received a strange invitation: the sixty-three-year-old Empress Dowager Tzu Hsi was hosting a banquet in their honor in the Forbidden City in Beijing. The ambassadors themselves had been quite displeased with the empress dowager, for several reasons. She was a Manchu, a race of northerners who had conquered China in the early seventeenth century,
The barge she sat in, like a
establishing the Ching Dynasty and ruling the country for nearly three
burnish'd throne, \Burn'd
hundred years. By the 1890s, the Western powers had begun to carve up
on the water: the poop was
beaten gold; \ Purple the

parts of China, a country they considered backward. They wanted China
sails, and so perfumed that
to modernize, but the Manchus were conservative, and resisted all reform.
\ The winds were love-sick
Earlier in 1898, the Chinese Emperor Kuang Hsu, the empress dowager's
with them; the oars were
silver, \ Which to the tune

twenty-seven-year-old nephew, had actually begun a series of reforms,
of flutes kept stroke, and
with the blessings of the West. Then, one hundred days into this period of
made \ The water which
reform, word reached the Western diplomats from the Forbidden City that
they beat to follow faster, \

As amorous of their

the emperor was quite ill, and that the empress dowager had taken power.
strokes. For her own
They suspected foul play; the empress had probably acted to stop the re-
person, \ It beggar'd all
forms. The emperor was being mistreated, probably poisoned—
description: she did lie \ In
perhaps he was already dead. When the seven ambassadors' wives were
her pavilion
—
cloth-of-gold
of tissue
— \
O'er picturing

preparing for their unusual visit, their husbands warned them: Do not trust
that Venus where we see \

the empress dowager. A wily woman with a cruel streak, she had risen from
The fancy outwork nature:
obscurity to become the concubine of a previous emperor and had man-
on each side her \ Stood
pretty dimpled boys, like

aged over the years to accumulate great power. Far more than the emperor,
smiling Cupids, \ With
she was the most feared person in China.

divers-colour'd fans, whose

On the appointed day, the women were borne into the Forbidden City
wind did seem \ To glow
the delicate cheeks which

in a procession of sedan chairs carried by court eunuchs in dazzling uni-
they did cool, \ And
forms. The women themselves, not to be outdone, wore the latest Western
what they undid did. . . . \

fashions—tight corsets, long velvet dresses with leg-of-mutton sleeves, bil-
Her gentlewomen, like the
Nereids, \ So many

lowing petticoats, tall plumed hats. The residents of the Forbidden City
mermaids, tended her i' the
looked at their clothes in amazement, and particularly at the way their
eyes, \ And made their
dresses displayed their prominent bosoms. The wives felt sure they had im-
bends adornings: at the
pressed their hosts. At the Audience Hall they were greeted by princes and
helm \ A seeming mermaid
steers: the silken tackle
\

princesses, as well as lower royalty. The Chinese women were wearing
Swell with the touches of
magnificent Manchu costumes with the traditional high, jewel-encrusted
those flower-soft hands \

black headdresses; they were arranged in a hierarchical order reflected in
That yarely frame the
office. From the barge \ A

the color of their dresses, an astounding rainbow of color.

strange invisible perfume

The wives were served tea in the most delicate porcelain cups, then
hits the sense \ Of the
267

268 • The Art of Seduction

adjacent wharfs. The city

were escorted into the presence of the empress dowager. The sight took
cast \ Her people out upon

their breath away. The empress was seated on the Dragon Throne, which
her; and Antony, \
was studded with jewels. She wore heavily brocaded robes, a magnificent
Enthron'd i' the market-

place, did sit alone, \
headdress bearing diamonds, pearls, and jade, and an enormous necklace of
Whistling to the air;

perfectly matched pearls. She was a tiny woman, but on the throne, in that
which, but for vacancy, \
dress, she seemed a giant. She smiled at the ladies with much warmth and
Had gone to gaze on

Cleopatra too \ And made
sincerity. To their relief, seated below her on a smaller throne was her
a gap in nature.

nephew the emperor. He looked pale, but he greeted them enthusiastically

— W I L L I A M SHAKESPEARE,

and seemed in good spirits. Maybe he was indeed simply ill.

A
N T O N Y AND CLEOPATRA

The empress shook the hand of each of the women. As she did so, an

attendant eunuch handed her a large gold ring set with a large pearl, which she slipped onto each woman's hand. After this introduction, the wives
In the palmy days of the
were escorted into another room, where they again took tea, and then were
gay quarters at Edo there
led into a banqueting hall, where the empress now sat on a chair of yellow
was a connoisseur of

fashion named Sakakura

satin—yellow being the imperial color. She spoke to them for a while; she
who grew intimate with the
had a beautiful voice. (It was said that her voice could literally charm birds
great courtesan Chitose.

out of trees.) At the end of the conversation, she took the hand of each
This woman was much

given to drinking sake; as

woman again, and with much emotion, told them, "One family—all one
a side dish she relished the
family." The women then saw a performance in the imperial theater. Fi
so-called flower crabs, to be
nally the empress received them one last time. She apologized for the per
found in the Mogami
River in the East, and

formance they had just seen, which was certainly inferior to what they
these she had pickled in
were used to in the West. There was one more round of tea, and this time,
salt for her enjoyment.

as the wife of the American ambassador reported it, the empress "stepped
Knowing this, Sakakura

forward and tipped each cup of tea to her own lips and took a sip, then
commissioned a painter of