“What are you talking about?”
“This overwhelming obsession you have with my safety. I know you didn’t ask for it, but I didn’t ask to be a powerful Fighter, either.” Looks like we were both given burdens we’re not too thrilled to carry.
“You think that’s what this is about—
your safety
?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
Luka takes a step toward me, his eyes narrowing. “If this was only about your safety, then why would I kiss you?”
“I don’t know. You were confused. You were relieved.” And it’s been a long time. “You heard what Non said in class. The relationship between Keepers and their
anima
has nothing to do with romantic feelings.”
“Last I checked, Non’s not a Keeper.” He takes another step closer.
“Claire said you felt like my babysitter.”
“Claire doesn’t know anything.” He takes one final step, closing any smidgen of distance between us. “If you want to know what it’s like being your Keeper, you should ask your Keeper.”
But I can’t. He’s standing so close I can barely think.
Luka tucks a strand of hair behind my ear.
My heart takes off.
Beat, beat, beat
—faster than the wings of a hummingbird.
“It’s like fire and oxygen.” He traces my jaw with the pad of his thumb. “I touch you and everything ignites. You walk into the room and every single one of my senses comes to life.” He takes my wrist and places my hand against his chest. His muscles are hard and warm beneath my palm. “You push me away, and it’s torture. You hurt, and I’m in agony. You smile, and it’s like I’ve won the world. Don’t even get me started on your laugh.”
I can’t breathe. My lungs have officially stopped working.
“
Anima
, Tess.
Breath of life
.” Luka curls his fingers around the back of my neck. “It’s not your safety I care about. It’s your being.” He crushes me against him, his lips melding with mine, and I think my hummingbird of a heart might lift me off the ground altogether. His free hand moves to my back, where he grabs a fistful of my shirt. He smells like wintergreen and he tastes like butterscotch. His grip is firm and his lips? An impossible combination of hard and soft. By the time he’s through, my entire body hums. The world spins. And tears sting my eyes. Because his words? That kiss? They are too good. Impossibly, euphorically good.
Luka cups the sides of my face with his hands, presses his forehead against mine. “Please Tess, I’m begging you. Don’t do this.”
And just like that, I come crashing down to earth. “You’re asking the impossible.”
“No, I’m not.”
I take his hands from my face and hold them together in front of my heart. “You’re my Keeper. Nothing will happen to me.”
“Gabe was powerful.”
“So?”
“So, he lost his sister anyway. And now he can hardly bear to live.”
“You’re just going to have to trust that what happened to her won’t happen to me. I
have
to do this.”
He pulls away. Shakes his head. He looks two seconds away from spitting at the floor. “Then you’re going to have to do it without me. I cannot watch you march to your death.”
Underway
L
eela sits on top of her comforter—one leg tucked beneath her, the other bent in front of her—painting her toenails with a bottle of bubblegum pink OPI nail polish, but the strangest thing happens. As soon as she brings the brush to her nail, the color comes out black. Muttering under her breath, she twists on the cap, gives it a nice shake, and tries again. More black.
“That’s weird.”
Leela looks up at the sound of my voice, her face brightening. She clambers off the bed and hugs me. “You’re here! I can’t believe you’re here! Did you see this nail polish? It must be a defective bottle.”
“Or you could be dreaming.”
She squints at her toe.
“Think about it, Leela. How else could I be here? I haven’t been in Thornsdale since you picked me and Luka up from that motel. We’re on the run, remember?”
She rubs her fingers over the spot on her arm I pinched the first time I visited her dream, when she thought she was at a football game with my brother.
“How’s my family?”
Leela scuffs her toes against the floor. They smear the carpet with streaks of black.
It was hard enough to ask the question in the first place—I’m so afraid to hear the answer—but now that it’s out, I’m not letting it pass by without a response. “Leela, I have to know.”
“They aren’t doing well.”
Emotion knots inside my throat.
“Your dad was moved to the California State Penitentiary.”
“
What
?”
“The judge refused to release him while he awaits trial.”
Every last drop of warmth drains from my face. “How can they do that? It was just a break-in. He didn’t murder anyone.” He didn’t even commit the crime. And now he’s in a state penitentiary? My
dad
?
“I’m so sorry, Tess.”
“What about my mom and Pete?”
“All I know is that they put your house up for sale. Pete hasn’t been at school much.”
I sink onto the edge of Leela’s bed.
“Luka’s parents moved, too. It finally came out on the local news a couple weeks ago—that Luka aided and abetted in your escape, that he used to be a patient at the Edward Brooks Facility.”
I shake my head. It doesn’t make sense. Why wait so long to out Luka? The only logical explanation I can think of is that they always knew of his role in my escape and were attempting to lure him back to Thornsdale with a false sense of safety, and when it became obvious that wasn’t working, they switched tactics. Or maybe his father simply ran out of influence.
“As soon as it all came to light, Luka’s parents packed up and moved away. Nobody knows where.” Leela eases down beside me. “Are you really in Detroit? Is it as dangerous as everyone says it is?”
Looking back, I never should have told Leela where we were headed. We’re lucky that didn’t come back to bite us. “I can’t say.”
“Are you and Luka still together?”
I nod, trying to push the news of my father aside. I can’t think about that right now. If I do, I’ll start coming unstitched, and now is not the time. So I shove it inside a box in my brain marked
later
and focus my attention on Leela. “I came tonight because we need your help.”
She crosses her legs and grabs onto her shins.
I absolutely hate dragging her into this more than I already have, but she’s our only viable option. The police are no doubt still trailing my mom and Pete. There’s no way they could get within a hundred mile radius of Shady Wood. “What I’m about to ask you to do is really dangerous, and I want you to know straight off the top that you can say no. You really can, Leela. If you have any misgivings at all, there won’t be any hard feelings. I promise.”
“You sure are making a hard sell.”
I smile sheepishly. Maybe Luka’s concerns got to me more than I thought.
“I don’t care if it’s dangerous, Tess. What’s happening right now to you and your family? It’s not right. I want to help in any way that I can.”
This should come as a huge sigh of relief, because Leela is in and she is a huge piece to our rescue mission puzzle, but all her willingness does is exacerbate the pit in my stomach. Luka doesn’t want to watch me march to my death. Am I asking Leela to march to hers? “It involves Shady Wood.”
“The place your dad’s been accused of breaking into?”
“The one and only.”
“Okay.”
“We’re going to break out two patients who are there, but shouldn’t be there.” I’m not actually sure any of the patients should be there, but since we have to start somewhere, my grandma and Clive will be that starting point.
“Who is
we
—you and Luka?”
“And some others. I can’t go into the details of how it’s going to work, I just need you to trust me that we can get them as far as outside the gate. What we can’t do is drive them away, which is where you would come in.”
“When?”
“Tomorrow night.” It’s incredibly fast notice, I know this. But Cap agreed that now that we’ve started, the quicker we can finish, the better. Two nights of no medicine for my grandma and Clive should be plenty. Any more would arouse suspicion, any less and they’d still be too groggy. “Do you think you can get there?”
Leela nods.
I give her the address. She picks up a pink gel pen to write it down, but I remind her that this is a dream. If she doesn’t remember when she wakes up, she’ll have to Google it. “You’ll need to arrive by midnight.”
“Where am I taking them?”
“The closest Greyhound station. There will be two tickets waiting for them.” Thanks to Link’s hacking abilities, all they will need to do is step up to the automated ticket booth, punch in a code, and their tickets will spit right into their hands. “If they aren’t outside the gates by one, then leave. We failed. I’ll find you as soon as I can to explain what happened.”
“Got it.”
“Tomorrow morning, a man named Dr. Carlyle is going to call you. He’s going to ask if you remember what you’re supposed to do. He knows the plan, so if any of these details are vague, you can ask him.”
She nods again. “Dr. Carlyle. I won’t forget.”
“Leela?”
“Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
She gives me her thousand-watt smile and wraps me in a hug once more. “I miss you,” she whispers.
I squeeze her back, because I miss her too. More than she could possibly know. And then I close my eyes and I think about Link. When I open them again, I’m no longer being hugged by Leela inside her bedroom. I’m standing in front of Link in an understated dream space, at least for him. Probably because he had to use all his mental energy on linking Cap and Sticks, who are already here. When I admitted to Cap that someone from the other side was standing guard inside Clive’s room and that I had to fight him off before switching out his medication for IV fluid, he was adamant about him and Sticks coming tonight, as well as a Guardian, in case there are more this time. I didn’t argue.
“Is she in?” Link asks.
“She’s in.”
“All right then, on to phase two.” He grabs my hand, since there’s not much of anything for me to anchor myself to but him.
I close my eyes. The room shifts, widens. And just like that, there’s Non.
“I thought you were getting Luka,” Cap says.
“He didn’t want to come.” Even as I say it, I know he didn’t mean it. I know he regrets the words he spoke in anger. He’s not more than a blink away, a breath. As though he’s willing me to find him. But he made his wishes clear. And besides, we have a Guardian. Seeing as Link and I did this on our own the night before, and we’re just popping over for a very quick medicinal switch, I think we are more than covered.
Cap grumbles something that I ignore. I can’t think about his disapproval right now, or Luka’s absence. Right now, the only person I need to think about is my grandmother. The five of us join hands. I’m not linking my grandmother’s dream to Link’s, I’m actually hopping to her dream and taking these guys with me. It’s not something I’ve tried before with this many people. Gripping Link’s hand so tightly he grimaces, I close my eyes and think.
The world drops.
And we’re there. Standing in a very light fog, nothing at all like the night before. What’s even better? My grandmother’s waiting for us with a world of hope in her eyes. “You came back,” she says.
“We promised we would.”
She looks from me to the four standing behind me. “You brought friends.”
“They want to help, too.”
“Do you think the doctors or nurses suspect anything?” Link asks.
“I don’t think so,” she says.
I let out a sigh of relief, then tune into the tugging behind my belly. I take a step toward the doorway, but Cap grabs my arm. “Sticks and I will pass through. Link will take Non. I’ll change out the medicine. You will stay here. As long as you maintain our link, we’ll be able to come back through just fine.”
“Why can’t I go?”
“Because if there was someone standing guard in Clive’s room last night, there are bound to be more waiting on the other side right now, and Luka is right. You have a giant target on your back. You are being hunted, Tess. It’s best if we don’t make you easy to find.”
Something in me cries foul. I started this; I should finish it. And besides, I’m supposed to be the strongest Fighter. Why would I stay back here while Cap and Sticks and Non and Link put their lives in danger? “I want to go.”
“It’s not a request. You’re staying here.” Cap lets go of my arm. “Your presence isn’t necessary.”
“But—”
“I’ve let a lot slide. Please do not test my patience right now.”
The two of us have a brief face-off in the middle of my grandmother’s dream—his silver-eyed stare meeting my navy-blue one, and as much as I don’t want to, I stand down. Cap is the alpha here. Although I may be more powerful in theory, he’s calling the shots. He’s been calling the shots for a long time now. It’s best if I learn to respect that.
I watch as Cap, Sticks, Link, and Non stop in front of the invisible doorway. Link takes Non’s hand and the four of them step through. There’s an odd sort of tugging sensation, as if my link with them is trying to pull itself away. I grab hold of it with my mind and begin counting the way I was taught to count seconds in kindergarten, when we lived in Missouri, right along the Mississippi River. One-Mississippi, two-Mississippi, three-Mississippi. I get all the way to seventy-eight Mississippi’s before the four of them return.
“Did you run into any problems?”
“None,” Cap says. “It was a little suspicious if you ask me.”
“You think the other side should have been there?”
“Yes.”
Well, best not to dwell on it right now. We have to get to Clive. Link explains the full plan to my grandmother, then the five of us grab hands and I envision the man with the army haircut, standing at attention like a bona fide soldier. My stomach drops. There’s a bit of a swish. And he’s there, waiting for us just like he was before. He doesn’t even ask about the extra people.
Cap, Sticks, Link, and Non pass through again and I wait, counting Mississippi’s while Clive watches me. When I reach eighty-Mississippi, I start to get nervous. I find my feet creeping closer and closer to the doorway, until I’m so close that the tugging is officially a yank. It would be so easy to step through and make sure everything is okay.