The Confessions of X (36 page)
In the fictional letters I have Augustine send to X, I have freely paraphrased Augustine's own words taken from the
Confessions
, as well as letters and sermons from his life as priest and bishop. The voice that emerges is, therefore, Augustine more as he was to become than as he was at the historical date the events take place.
Recent history has often judged Augustine harshly, portraying him as a kill-joy lecturing primly against sex. He has also been accused of being a hypocrite for having enjoyed an illicit relationship for years and then preaching about chastity. This is due, I believe, to the fact that it is assumed the
Confessions
is the summation of Augustine's thought and life whereas it is only the beginning of his spiritual journey. The Christian Neoplatonism that marked his conversion would over time mature into a deeply sacramental understanding of the flesh and spirit aided, in part, by
his campaigns against various gnostic sects during his life, including the Manichees, the Donatists, and the Pelagians.
The mature Augustine would cause rioting in his church when he gave a sermon criticizing men for saying women were weak when they themselves were committing adultery and fornication. The old and sick Augustine would make a final journey to a town on the coast to visit a young girl who had been kidnapped, raped, and then ransomed back to her parents by pirates. It had come to his attention that the townsfolk, and even the parents, regarded the girl as “defiled.” He spent more than an hour talking with the girl alone and then emerged to sternly tell the parents and town that the girl was the innocent victim of sin and not the perpetrator. For his time, this was a radical stance to take toward women.
It is worth noting that in the Middle Ages, Augustine was regarded as the Saint of Love and is often depicted in paintings holding a large red heart with flames shooting out of it. Today, we tend to see him puritanically wagging his finger at us. Augustine would have roared with laughter at this. He was a passionate, fiercely intelligent, humorous man with a gift for friendship. It seemed to me that only a similarly remarkable woman would have fallen in love with such a man. For a balanced portrait of this great man, I recommend Peter Brown's magisterial biography,
Augustine of Hippo
, to which I am deeply indebted.
Finally, it is my hope that this novel will bring X, Augustine, Monica, Nebridius, and Adeodatus to life so that you may love them as I have grown to love them.
1. As a woman in the ancient world, X's options are very limited: not only is she a female and, thus, without legal status, but she is poorâand not a Roman citizen. Do you think she makes the right decision in agreeing to become Augustine's concubine or do you think she should have married Paulinus, the man her aunt chose for her? What would you have done?
2. Augustine is obviously a restless soul. As he famously said: “Our hearts are restless until they rest in thee, O, God.” Do you find it believable that the concubine could have loved such a man given their differences in social status and education? Do you think she shows great courage in love or great naivete?
3. Does her decision to leave Augustine for the sake of his career shock you or do you admire her for her self-sacrifice?
4. Do you think that X should have been more guarded in her relationship with Monica? Do you think that Monica truly loves her as a daughter or has she only got her own son's interests at heart?
5. Do you think Monica is a good person or is she the proverbial passive/aggressive mother-in-law?
6. In the ancient world, men and women led much more segregated lives than they do today. Did you find this distinction between the public world of men and the
domestic world of women jarring? Do you think the women characters in the novel are diminished because their sphere of influence is limited to that of the home and family? Do the women in the novel have attributes of character that may have been lost or forgotten in our contemporary world?
7. Childbearing and childbirth were the dominant realities for women in the ancient world. Do you think this limits the female characters or reveals a hidden strength that is often overlooked and undervalued in our own time?
8. Does the concubine's decision to leave her son shock you? Do you think she is a bad mother?
9. Do you find it believable that X frees her slaves? What would you have done?
10. One of the recurring themes in the story is the conflict between “flesh” and “spirit.” Augustine in particular struggles with the nature of the body. Do you think X helps him to change or grow with regard to these issues?
11. In the forty years that X and Augustine live apart, do you think X still loves him? Do you think Augustine still loves her? Why do you think she goes to Hippo Regius to be at his deathbed? Do you think her decision to go is a sign of weakness or of strength?
12. X states plainly that she neither prays to the Punic gods nor to the Christian God. Her reasoning is that the Christian God “took too much from me.” Do you consider this a sign of her integrity or spiritual blindness? When Augustine converts, do you think she should have followed suit? Do you admire or feel critical of this independence?
I
want to thank Daisy Blackwell Hutton, fiction publisher at HarperCollins Christian Publishing, who has been a tireless advocate of this book and whose editorial suggestions returned me to the story with renewed vision. I also want to thank Ellen Tarver for her superb line edits and Carol Mann, my agent. I am enormously grateful to Dr. Owen Ewald, C. May Marston Assistant Professor of Classical Languages and Civilizations at Seattle Pacific University, who graciously agreed to read the completed manuscript with an eye to historical inaccuracies and errors. Thanks also to my friend and colleague at Seattle Pacific University, Dr. Christine Chaney, who as former chair of the English department worked on my behalf in a variety of ways.
Many, many thanks to Jim and Bev Ohlman as well as Terry and Corrie Moore who allowed me to live in their beautiful Orcas Island homes for long stretches over the past four years so I could write amidst the tranquility and beauty of the San Juan Islands.
This book has consumed the last eight years of my life, and I could not have accomplished this without the love and support of my husband, Gregory Wolfe, and my children, Magdalen, Helena,
Charles, and Benedict. Gregory is, and always has been, my first reader and editor; his critiques and advice have made this the book I wanted to write. My children have patiently endured their mother's obsessiveness and exhaustion not only without complaint but with great charity. Thanks, guys. I can never repay the debt I owe you.
Wolfe-Blevins Photography
S
uzanne M. Wolfe grew up in Manchester, England, and read English Literature at Oxford University, where she cofounded the Oxford C.S. Lewis Society. She is Writer in Residence at Seattle Pacific University and has taught literature and creative writing there since 2000. Wolfe is the author of
Unveiling: A Novel
(Paraclete Press, 2004) and co-founder, along with her husband, of
Image
, a journal of the arts and faith. Suzanne and Greg have also co-authored many books on literature and prayer and are the parents of four grown children. They live outside of Seattle.
Visit the author's website at
www.suzannemwolfe.com
.