"What do you see in me?"
She gritted her teeth against the pain in her head and focused upon Gen with new eyes and saw his tightly ordered structure. She looked closer and saw so much damage it made a part of her hurt. Almost all of his weave had been ripped to pieces and rewoven. There were repairs everywhere. She couldn't feel a weakness in any of them though. Most of the repairs carried a hematite sheen covering the silver. "I see pain."
"Now look at yourself." She looked down and for the first time saw her web of black interlaced with the flashes of red. Some parts of her weave were damaged and not repaired. The web looked to have been burnt there. She had a feeling she knew what that represented. She blocked out those memories and focused again on her core self. She looked back to Gen's eyes. She flinched as she saw the energy of the anger he held there still.
"What are those flashes of red? Is that common? What did you find out about me?"
"I don't know for certain but I have a good guess. Do you remember when you said you didn't feel human? She nodded. "Well I believe you may be half right."
"What do you mean? Are you saying I'm half human and half something else? What half elf? Half dwarf?"
"Nothing that simple I'm afraid."
“Well you can't tell me all of this and then just shut up about it! What are you saying that I am?"
Gen sighed and leaned back, placing his hands on the ground and looking up to the sky. "I may be wrong.”
“To the hells with that! Just tell me!”
“Hells... Appropriate I suppose.” Gen looked back down at her meeting her gaze with those damned cold eyes. His voice was quiet. “Demon, Beth. I think you are a Hanyou."
"D-Demon? Are you serious?" She started to laugh then realized the energies of his aura had not changed. She felt that he spoke the truth. "How is that even possible?"
"It's possible. Though it doesn't happen often. I'm sorry to be the one to tell you but maybe it will help you understand yourself better."
"I don't know what to say." She hung her head. "How do I turn this vision back off?" Her headache was beginning to be unbearable.
He spoke one word and she repeated it. Her vision went back to normal. She put her head in her hands and fought back tears. How could she be half-demon? Did that mean she had to kill humans now and do only evil? Isn't that how it worked?
"The spell I just taught you." His tone made her look up. "Don't ever teach it to anyone else. At least not until you are out of this Schola. It gives an unfair advantage, as I found out long ago.”
"What is that spell? I've never heard of any like it." She was happy to be talking about anything but what she had just learned. She just wanted to forget the demon stuff.
"It's a spell taught to me when I was very young. I didn't tell anyone about it. Though I think the Headmaster suspected that I could do something like it. If you can see the web of magic, then it becomes easier to construct it. Also it makes it easier to take spells apart. Though that can be very dangerous! So be careful with it. I do have a question though. How could you tell I was using it on you this morning at breakfast?"
"I couldn't. I just felt like your eyes were staring into my soul. I guess in a way you were." She laughed a bit before the sadness took her again.
"We need to stop that sadness of yours right now. I don't need any more grief and we both know that yours will bleed into me." He reached out and placed his hand under her chin. He tilted her face up to meet his. "Do you want me to teach you a bit of my art now? Would that cheer you up a bit?" His eyes held kindness and she smiled a bit.
"I would like that very much." She wiped the tear from her blue eye and stood up. He stood up as well and took her hand. He led her off toward the greenhouse. When they arrived at the greenhouse, he opened the large glass door at the left and walked in after her. Marcus was transplanting seedlings of basil into bigger pots and turned to face them as they entered. He smiled when he saw Beth then frowned a bit when he saw Gen following close behind.
"Marcus. It's good to see you again. How is Thomas feeling?"
"Thomas is doing much better, though I believe it will be a few days till he is out of bed. What brings you and little Beth to the greenhouse?"
"I need a small mint plant. Do you happen to have an extra one I could use?"
"Wait here. I'll go get you one." Marcus walked off deeper into the greenhouse and came back shortly carrying a red clay pot with a small mint plant about the size of his hand sprouting from the top of it. Gen took the pot when he offered it and thanked him. He turned after a nod and walked back out the greenhouse holding the door for Beth behind him. She followed him out and back to the main ritual area. He walked to the middle of the circle and dug a small hole with his hand and planted the mint into the well trodden dirt there. He asked Beth to stand outside the circle and slowly began to sing a spell. The words sounded elven to Beth's ears and the mint plant started growing and spreading. After a short time, the main circle was covered in mint up to Gen's hip.
"Come to the center of the circle." Gen motioned to Beth. She walked to him, careful to keep her arms crossed so she didn't touch any of the plants accidentally.
"Now repeat the spell I taught you." She cast the spell and the whole world once more shifted almost sickeningly into the aura-weave spectrum. Her headache returned almost instantly.
"See the green weave of the mint?" She nodded. "Touch the nearest plant and watch what happens."
She already knew what would happen. She had done this many times already. Though this time, she could see what was going on. She watched as the red flashed through her hand and into the green weave of the plant's aura. The red drew some of the green energy into it. Then the red flooded into the weave of the plant turning it all red. It flashed quickly then the weave turned brown and fell apart. She felt the leaves turn to dust in her hand and knew she had killed the plant. Part of her felt sad that it was gone but another part of her rejoiced in the destruction. She shook her head.
"The demonic part of you knows innately how to destroy simple weaves. You can stop it from happening though. Try again on the next plant. This time focus on holding the red back away from your hand when you touch it."
She reached out again and grabbed a nearby plant. The red flashed out from her core again but this time she fought it. She pushed it back away from her hand. Her forehead broke out into a sweat. The red flashed stronger and stronger against the wall she had put up in her weave. She let out a yelp of pain as it suddenly broke through the wall and she heard the plant instantly turn to ash.
"I can't hold it back! What kind of monster am I?" She put her head back in her hands and fought tears. She felt hands on her shoulders.
"You are not a monster. Your name is Beth and you are a person. If you want to learn how to deal with this, then we will. You tried a simple wall but that only let the force build up before it was released. This time try diverting it. Direct it into your other hand. Use the red energy to make a small ball of flame in your left hand as you hold the plant with your right. You can do it. Just try." He removed his hands from her shoulders and stepped back a bit. She let her hands drop back to her sides and took a few deep breaths. She reached out again to a mint plant. This time when the red flashed through her weave toward the plant she forced it to flow to her other hand. Sweat once more broke out on her forehead. Gen whispered in her ear.
"Don't fight it. Let it flow. Build the anger. Direct it. Use it to do what you want. It doesn't have to control you. You can control it."
She gritted her teeth and for the first time that she could remember, she let down some of the barriers she had put up against letting her anger truly go. The fire coursed through her veins instantly. She called a ball of fire forth in her left hand and it lit before she got out the whole incantation. It burnt a bright orange. The ball was about the size of her head and growing bigger. She fought to control the anger back down. It wouldn't stop. The fire grew and grew till a pillar of it about Gen's height stood in her left hand. The heat of it began to burn the sleeve of her robes. Gen reached his arm into the flames and placed a small orange stone into her open palm. His sleeve steamed when he withdrew his hand. The fire drew into the stone and the stone started glowing.
"Look to the plant," he whispered through gritted teeth.
She looked back down and saw that the plant's weave had been damaged by her right hand making a fist around it but it was still alive and healthy.
"Let go of the plant," Gen whispered again in a voice that felt like ice on the back of her neck.
She let go of the mint. She suspected that the anger would stop once she let go but it didn't. Her breathing grew shorter and she began to seethe with it. Her vision went completely red. The aura sight spell was broken and the world once again returned to normal, though everything was tinted a shade of red. The stone in her hand was starting to grow painful to look at.
"Calm down, Beth." Gen's whisper tried to soothe but the cold anger in it felt like shards of ice ripping through her.
"I can't stop it!" she managed to say between gritted teeth.
"You must stop it!" The shards ripped through her, even sharper this time.
"I can't!" she screamed in fear and rage.
“You must. You aren't ready for this yet.”
“I can't! I just can't!”
“If you don't calm down I will have to force you to. It will not be pleasant.”
“Then do it! If you can.” The last part came out in a snarl. Her eyes turned to him, anger flowing through her and out all around. She felt her lips curl up into a sneer. The anger started to feel good. She could feel it tearing down all the walls she had put up over the years to stop it. She stopped caring what would happen, ignoring the small voice deep inside of her was pleading for her to stop.
Gen chanted quickly and Beth felt a pain beyond anything she had ever felt before. She looked down and saw Gen's hand was buried up to his wrist into her chest. He twisted his fingers and she felt the pain double. Suddenly the anger left her completely. Gen withdrew his hand and she looked down amazed that her skin was intact.
"What did you do to me?" she asked. She felt drained of all emotion, just tired. Gen sat down on the ground and sighed. His face hidden by the mint.
"I should have thought about you not being able to stop that force yet. I'm sorry." Beth slumped to the ground and stared at him. She felt empty of emotion.
"What did you do to me?" she asked again.
"I temporarily changed your weave. I drained all your emotions for a short time. They should come back soon." His voice sounded raw.
"I don't feel anything Gen. I'm just confused because I don't understand what you did."
"In a way, I've violated you more than those Eremian soldiers did. You will understand shortly when your emotions return. I can see the weave being rewoven in you as I speak."
"What is this stone?" She held up the painfully glowing orange stone the size of her thumb."
"It absorbs fire. It's almost to the point of bursting. If you try to put any more fire into it, the stone will explode violently. Of course you can also use the fire inside it instead of your own energy or channeled energy. Though I have a feeling you won't easily run out of that kind of energy."
"Is that because of what I am?" As the words left her mouth, her emotions slowly flooded back. She felt pain and a violation that was almost like what the Eremian soldiers had done to her. She started crying and was glad when Gen didn't touch her to try and console her. After her tears finally dried, she looked back up to Gen. He sat calmly in front of her, his eyes focused someplace distant.
"I'm not angry at you," she whispered through a throat that was raw from the tears.
"I am thankful for that. If there had been any other way to divert what was about to happen, I would have done it.”
"I want to know how you did to me what you did. I've never heard of a mage doing that to someone else. Is that necromancy?"
"Not entirely. The concepts you can understand but the spells to do what I did may never be reachable for you. I reached into your weave and undid the part of you that feels emotions. It is a very dangerous thing to do. Anytime you unravel a spell it can all come apart. The same thing can happen to people. If I had messed up at all you would have died or lost use of your mind. I'm sorry but I cannot explain anything else about it to you. Maybe years from now but not now."
"Will you not show me because of what I am?"
His eyes finally focused to her. "That is not it at all. What I did to you should never have to be done. It is not something easily learned or easily done. Great healers can do a technique like this. Maybe the healer here can teach you it. It is a bit safer to learn and much more useful. The healers deal mostly with the weave of the physical being, not the spiritual and mental sections. What I did manipulated all three at once. As I said, I must speak no more of it."
"Where did you learn how to do that?" She was not going to give up on this. The magic he had done to her had felt raw yet at the same time highly ordered and ancient.
"Must you really know where I learned it?" Gen looked into her eyes again and this time she saw again the pain that resided there.