The Heart Has Reasons (56 page)

“I’ll
admit this past month has been rough, and parts were absolute hell, but in the
end everything came out all right so, yes, I’m sure.  Absolutely.”

He
dropped his gaze and raked a hand through his hair.  “You have no idea how
relieved I am to hear that.”

“You
know, it’s strange but, during those five days we were together, even though I
was scared to death, I’d never in my life felt so alive.  In comparison,
the rest of my life now seems so … bland, so colorless.  I think I
understand why you found the Special Forces so appealing.  In any case,
I’ve spent the last two years looking over my shoulder for Sparrow and, now
that he’s dead, you can’t imagine my relief.  If you’d refused to do the
job, Sparrow would’ve hired someone else, and I’d now be dead.”

“I
hadn’t thought of it like that.”

“Nor
would we have met.”  She gazed at him a moment.  “Are you worried
that, in the future — if there
is
a future for us — I’ll throw
everything in your face?”

“Not
at all.  I’m simply worried you’ll never fully trust me.”

“Chase,”
— Jesus, he loved hearing her say his name — “I’ve invited you into my house,
so it’s glaringly obvious that I trust you, although sometimes that fact amazes
even me.”

“And
you’re
sure
you forgive me?”

“Why
is that so difficult to believe?”

“I
guess because I can’t forgive myself.”

“Everyone
makes mistakes.  Granted, not usually mistakes of such magnitude, but you
can’t keep beating yourself up over it.  I regret not one single thing you
or I did.”

“I
wish I could say the same.”

Their
conversation waned as the evening steadily darkened.  There were a million
things he wanted to say but somehow couldn’t find the words to express. 
He badly wanted to reach across the heavy silence that had descended between
them and take her hand but, with everything progressing so well, he was
hesitant to rush physical contact.

She
began to fidget, and sat gazing at the stacks of bills on the table before
her.  Shit.  It was time for him to go.

He
reluctantly got to his feet.  “It’s getting late, so I won’t keep you any
longer.  If you’ll give me your number, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

She
moved over to the counter where the phone sat, to scribble her number on a
notepad.  She was actually giving him a second chance.  He blinked
several times to clear his eyes, pocketed the square of paper she handed him,
and reluctantly followed her to the front room.

CHAPTER
40

A bubble of happiness steadily expanded
inside of Larissa until she felt as if she would burst.  Chase had flown
clear across the country to tell her he had feelings for her.  There
really had been some serious chemistry between them.  She
wasn’t
crazy, masochistic, or suffering from any freaking psychological
syndrome.  And not only was he giving her
forty-thousand
dollars,
he might actually move to Charleston!  Maybe she should pinch herself to
see if she were dreaming.

In
the front room, Chase pulled the curtain aside and peered down the street.
 Having nearly forgotten how truly handsome he was, she found she couldn’t
take her eyes from him.  “What are you looking at?”

“Checking
to see if Brendon’s still out there.”

“‘Still
out there’?”

“He
followed us in his car while we walked.  Looks like he finally gave up and
left.”

“Why
didn’t you say something?”

“Wasn’t
important.  He’s understandably worried about you.”

The
way he stood gazing down at her was making her breathing malfunction.  She
knew she should say something,
do
something, but so much emotion swirled
through her she could barely think.  The only thing she could come up with
was, “Thank you again for the money,” wincing at how lame she sounded. 
“It wasn’t necessary, but I do appreciate it.”

“After
all I put you through, it was the least I could do.”

The
air between them seemed to grow thick and electric, as expectant as right
before a thunderstorm.  She knew she should open the door but —
oh god
—
she didn’t want him to leave.  In all honesty, it probably
was
better
that they take things slow and get to know each other.  She stood there
gazing at his broad chest, unable to meet his eyes.

“Larissa,
thank you again for seeing me.”

She
licked suddenly dry lips, aware she was breathing heavily.  “Thank you for
coming.”  Crap.  Couldn’t she say
anything
that didn’t make
her sound like a moron?

When
she made no move to open the door, he stepped hesitantly toward her and her breath
caught as he wrapped his arms around her.  Her arms came up to circle his
waist as she relaxed against him, finding a long-delayed and exquisite
sanctuary in his strong embrace.

When
she inhaled, the masculine scent of him charged her body with a flush of
pleasure.  He shifted slightly, causing her swollen nipples to brush
against his chest, and her knees nearly buckled as desire surged through
her.  She closed her eyes, shuddering at the deliciousness of it, even as
her throat grew tight with longing.

They
stood there unmoving for several moments, holding each other.  When her
breath hitched in her throat, he asked, “Are you crying?”

She
pressed her face closer to his chest.  “No.”

He
took her chin in his hand and lifted her face to his.  “You
are
crying.”

“I
thought I’d never see you again.”

“So
you’re happy I came?”

She
nodded, and smiled through tears.  “Very.”

The
relief in his eyes was obvious.  “You’ve no idea how nervous I was.” 
He clasped her face between his hands and leaned down to give her a light kiss
on the lips.  Her arms tightened around him, and she stood gazing
expectantly up at him.  He kissed her again, his lips lingering on hers
this time.  She pressed the length of her body against his, feeling his
muscular chest rise and fall with each breath.  When he spoke, his voice
was husky with desire. “I’ve missed you so much, Larissa.” 

“I’ve
missed you too.”  He slid his fingers into her hair and kissed her again,
this time with a tender violence.  She moaned into his mouth as his tongue
met hers.  He grew hard against her and, when her breathing grew erratic,
she broke off the kiss to whisper, “Please don’t go.”

“If
I stay, I can’t promise I’ll have much self-control.”

“Chase,
you won’t need any.”

She
gasped as he swept her up into his arms and carried her down the hall,
remembering the way to her bedroom.

He
lowered her feet to the floor and took her in his arms again.  While he
kissed her, he reached in between them and unzipped her jeans.  As he slid
them down her legs, she pulled her tee shirt over her head and quickly removed
her bra.

He
sank to his knees before her to help her step out of the jeans now puddled
around her ankles, then tugged his shirt off and cast it aside.  There was
the sudden shock of his naked skin against her own as he pulled her against
him, pressing his face to her abdomen.  His voice, deep and resonate,
seemed to brush along the length of her spine as he murmured, “Ah, Jesus,
you’ve no idea how I’ve longed for you.”

“I
think I do,” she replied, her own voice husky with desire.  When she laid
her hand against his cheek, he covered it with his own and turned his head to
kiss her palm.  Still on his knees, he began running his hands over her
breasts, arms, stomach, thighs, hips, bottom, as if learning the feel of her
again, his touch searing her skin and filling her veins with liquid fire.

He
placed both hands on the tops of her thighs, to either side of her mount of
Venus.  “Widen your stance, and turn your knees out.”

“What?”
she said, startled by the request.  “Why?”

He
placed his two thumbs on her outer labia, and gently traced opposing circles,
making her eyes close in a rush of lust.  “Just do it.”

After
a moment of hesitation, she did as he asked.  He lowered himself so he was
sitting on his calves between her legs.  “Chase, let’s lie on the—” 
She broke off suddenly as he buried his face in the juncture of her
thighs.  “Oh!”  She threaded her fingers through his hair.  “
Oh-h-h-h-h!
”

It
seemed as though every drop of blood in her body instantly rushed to her
groin.  His mouth and tongue were a liquid heat that made her lower
abdomen tighten as hot, tingling pleasure spread throughout her.  When she
moaned and swayed on her feet, he slipped both arms between her thighs to cup her
bottom with strong hands, steadying her.

Her
body quickened, her breathing grew rougher and more ragged and, when her legs
began to tremble uncontrollably, he pulled away, causing her to cry out in
disappointment as her sex throbbed and ached for release.

He
rose with a rippling of muscles, and devoured her lips with an exquisitely sexy
kiss that tasted of her.  Backing her slowly toward the bed, he eased her
down crosswise onto the mattress and raised her legs to plant her feet flat on
the mattress.  He then peeled out of his shoes and slacks, his eyes never
leaving her body.

Penis
erect and throbbing, he knelt beside the bed.  Once again at eye level
with the most intimate part of her, he spread her thighs to expose her fully to
his gaze, drinking in the sight.  No man had ever done such a thing to her
and she felt a pang of self-consciousness.  “What are you doing?”

When
he raised his eyes to hers, the expression in them was so intense, so hot, that
her breath caught in her throat.  “Looking at you.”

“Why?”

“Because
you’re so beautiful.  You should see yourself.  You look like a
Georgia O’Keeffe painting.”  He placed his hands again on her mound and
massaged lightly in small opposing circles that made her whole body flush with
a trembling heat and soon had her moaning softly.  Then his head dipped
down, his mouth closed around the little nub of exquisitely sensitive flesh,
and she forgot all about being self-conscious.

He
gently made love to her with his mouth, making her body hum like a tuning
fork.  Before long, she was moaning and clutching the bedspread and
writhing so frantically that he draped his arms across her thighs to keep her
pinned to the mattress.

When
her body was once again on the very edge of orgasm, he abruptly stopped. 
She cried out in dismay as quivering spasms rippled through her belly. 
When she tried to arch her body up to meet his mouth again, he drew back. 
“Not yet.”

When
he joined her on the bed, she immediately rolled on top of him, relishing the
solid feel of him beneath her.  She straddled him and, holding his face
between her hands, kissed him deeply.  He cupped her breasts, his thumbs
circling and teasing her nipples, making her eyes roll back as shudders rippled
the length of her body.

When
she rose up to guide him to the slippery cleft between her legs, he uttered,
“Uh-uh,” and rolled them over so that he was atop her.

His
lips found her throat, and worked their way down to fasten gently on one
nipple.  She groaned and arched against him as a shower of sparks cascaded
down to settle as a searing ache between her thighs.  He switched to the
other, and when she was once again writhing beneath him, he suddenly stopped
and moved down her body slightly, to rest his cheek on her belly.

“What
are you doing?  Don’t stop.”

“I’ve
dreamed of this for the last three weeks.  I don’t want to rush.”

“Well,
I don’t want to wait.”

He
chuckled and kissed her belly, making the muscles in her abdomen jump and
quiver.  “I’m afraid you’re going to have to.”

“You’re
a cruel and heartless man.”

He
raised his head to give her a rakish grin.  “You have no idea.”

She
was way past the point of self-consciousness.  “Chase, I’m begging
you.  Stop teasing me.”

He
rose up to kneel on the bed between her spread thighs.  His penis was so
engorged with blood it looked about to burst.  Grasping it with a hand
that trembled slightly from his own pent up passion, he slid the broad,
purplish head up and down the slippery cleft between her legs.  “Can you
feel how wet you are?”

Her
“Yes” was a breathless whisper.

He
continued to tease her, lightly pressing the head against her opening so that
she could feel the hard insistence of him.  When she scooted toward him in
an attempt to impale herself, he drew back slightly.  “Uh-uh.”  Still
gripping himself, he lightly traced small circles around that most sensitive
spot, drawing out the anticipation until she thought she’d lose her mind.

She
gripped the pillow on either side of her head, writhing unashamedly. 
“Chase, for god’s sake, stop tormenting me.  I cannot bear anym—
oh-h-h-h-h,
”
she finished
as his solid hardness slid into her with an exquisite
slowness that felt as though it would split her asunder.