The Lady Who Lived Again (26 page)

“I owe that to you, of course,” he said, his smile fading.

She stared into his face, swallowing hard. She appreciated his gratitude. But it wasn’t love.

“Most importantly, I’m learning to accept my limitations.”

“You have no limitations,” she said.

He snorted. “While treating patients in Pittsburgh I did everything medically required. Followed every procedure. Only to realize this strict adherence to procedure may not always be best for the patient.” He shook his head. “A dying child should spend those final days at home in the arms of his mother, not confined in a hospital. Regardless of what’s medically recommended.” He smiled a sad smile. “Recommended by me.”

“I hope to devise individual treatments for my patients and specially tailored courses for prevention and management of disease. Little Joey Cleary, for instance, is doing well on his weekly visits.”

“That’s wonderful.” Maddie lowered her eyes. “I feared your association with me might hamper the success of your practice.”

He shook his head. “And I feared I would always be compared to Doctor Filmore. Despite his despicable handling of your case, the man’s reputation was pristine. People revered him.”

“Yes, they did.”

“I’d like to wring his neck for what he did to you, Maddie.”

Fire blazed in his eyes, and she warmed in his desire to protect her. She’d spent so long on her own.

His face softened with a smile, and her heart swelled with love. Real love. This was no playful dalliance, no girlish crush, no desire for attention. Her reflection shone in his eyes, and she saw with surprising clarity the woman she had become.

The silly belle she once was had been lost to her past, and she couldn’t help wondering, what precisely about her former self did she miss?

The rehearsal dinner was a lavish affair. Maddie took a calming breath and tried to enjoy it. Linen-covered tables arranged in the shape of a horseshoe bordered the room with Amelia and Lester seated front and center. Candle sconces glowed on the walls. Courses of Julien soup and baked salmon preceded stuffed quails and partridges, filet of beef and potato croquettes. Toasts were made in the couple’s honor as finely attired guests indulged in endless bottles of wine.

The families of the Fair Five were seated a safe distance from Maddie and Jace. As of yet, none of them had approached her. She hadn’t expected they would, and she couldn’t blame them. She knew how painful it must be for them to see her, to be reminded that she’d lived to attend this happy occasion when the girls they loved had not.

She shrank with remorse inside her beautiful new gown, taking refuge behind the tall floral centerpiece. All at once she wanted to flee from the room. From herself. The urge intensified when Pastor Hogle rose to offer a prayer.

Lifting a glass in his hand, he followed with a toast that rambled into a sermon. Something about paying for one’s sins, good and evil, and striving to recognize the difference and not be deceived. Maddie clenched her satin skirts as the Pastor’s eyes burned into her. Jace squeezed her hand in reassurance, and in that slightest of gestures, she loved him even more.

If only he could love her back. She chided herself for the futility of the thought. Jace did not want to have those feelings. He believed romantic love would interfere with professional goals. And even if he was convinced otherwise, there could be no real future for them together. Not with the secret she kept.

Music filled the grand ballroom and dancing commenced. As promised, Jace danced with Dolly. The blissful smile on the girl’s face warmed Maddie to her toes. From over Dolly’s shoulder, Jace flashed Maddie a wink. She smiled back at him, beaming with pride.

To Maddie’s surprise, when the music ended, Dolly approached her. “Madeline, I wish to tell you something.”

Maddie glanced around to see if any of the Hogles noticed the girl’s bold move.

“If you’re worried about Matthew, rest assured. He’s not here.”

“He’s not?”

Dolly shook her head. “Uncle sent him to Altamont under the pretense of a dire errand.”

“What do you mean?”

Dolly smiled. “I did it, Madeline. I stood up to Uncle this afternoon. I told him if he forced me to marry Matthew, I would hate him forever.”

Maddie stared, stunned.

“I couldn’t believe his reaction. It was…so unexpected.” Tears welled in Dolly’s eyes. “He told me that after losing a daughter, he could not bear to lose a niece, too.”

Maddie swallowed hard at the pastor’s words. Elizabeth had been the man’s only child. His open hatred for Maddie had made it easy to forget the deep pain behind it.

“He will break the news to Matthew upon his return from Altamont,” Dolly said with a smile.

“I’m so very happy for you, Dolly.” Maddie spied Pastor Hogle craning his neck in their direction. “You’d better rejoin your family now,” she said with a pat to the girl’s hand.

Dolly walked back toward her family, and Maddie couldn’t miss the jubilant bounce in her step as she made her way back across the dance floor.

“Dance with me?” Jace appeared beside Maddie and extended his hand.

Maddie took it, and he led her through the crowded room and out to the deserted veranda for the next dance.

He held her close, and her body reacted as it always did in his arms. Magically. Her pulse skittered and her senses peaked. The heat of him radiated through her, a pleasant contrast to the soft chill of the breeze on her flesh. Beneath the stars, they swayed to the music, their bodies moving as one.

It was a perfect dance, and she’d remember it always. If nothing else, these past few weeks had provided her with a mountain of moments like these, moments that would sustain her for the rest of her days. It would all end tomorrow, but she wouldn’t think of that now. Jace was hers until then. She snuggled closer to his shoulder. The wonderful scent of him engulfed her, and she closed her eyes, inhaling it in. She savored his essence so she would never forget, all the while knowing her memories would have to be enough.

* * * *

Jace moved against the warmth of Maddie’s body, his mind drifting off with the rhythm of the music. The shapely feel of her drove him mad as he fought for composure.

But the agony of arousal was a welcome distraction. The icy treatment Maddie had received all evening was difficult to bear. Even as people openly shunned her, she’d held herself together. She was a remarkable woman, and for reasons that had nothing to do with her unfortunate past. She was bright and compassionate, and possessed a strength and resiliency that amazed him. He’d never known anyone like her.

The thought that she soon would revert to her isolated life gnawed at him. He envisioned her, wiling away the hours in her room, carving those wooden boxes. At least throughout the duration of their ruse, she’d gotten out of the house. Forcing herself to face people every day hadn’t been easy, he knew, but it was good for her.

Her well-being concerned him, not as it might with a patient, but as a man who cared for a woman. As much as he wished it weren’t so, he could not deny this. His failure with Kathy had prompted his interest in Maddie. But pursuing that interest had created something more.

There was also the indisputable fact that he would miss seeing her every day. He’d adapted well to her presence around the office, and he would miss the afternoon coffee they shared. He suddenly realized how quiet the house would be without her. How lonely
he
would be without her.

“I was thinking, Maddie, that you might consider staying on at the office,” he said.

She looked up at him, eyes wide. “You were?”

He nodded in as business-like a manner as he could muster.

“My patient records are well organized, and you keep a calm head during emergencies. I meant it when I told you that you would make a good nurse. I don’t always enjoy your opinionated approach to office management, but I’ll sorely miss your help.”

She smiled. “Is that so?” Her teasing tone came complete with a coy toss of her hair. The woman was a vixen. Moonlight shone on her creamy shoulders and neck. Her intoxicating scent wafted around him like invisible hands, pulling him toward her. Jace wanted nothing more than to have her again.

“What else, specifically,” she asked, “would you miss?” Her lips quivered with a brazen grin.

“Your fine penmanship,” he teased back.

“Is that all?”

“If you’re fishing for more compliments, you’d do better to toss a line in the lake.” He gestured with his head toward the water.

She smiled from ear to ear. “Oh doctor, what a delight you can be when you let down your guard.” She leaned closer. “You enjoy having me around, Jace Merrick, admit it.”

He shook his head, and she laughed.

“You are a menace,” he growled.

“Perhaps.” She shrugged. “But you like me anyway.”

He twirled her around, their bodies pressed tightly together. Music flowed out from the open doors. The smell of the lake and crisp night air filled his senses, and he felt so alive. Awakened.

For the briefest of moments he envied Lester and Amelia. The commitment of marriage was something Jace found implausible. Nothing could hold his interest as medicine did. He was certain of it. Tonight, though, with Maddie in his arms and the music playing, he wondered suddenly if it were possible that a man such as he could ever make a woman happy.

He thought of his parents and their neglected marriage. His mother had suffered the silent misery of her husband’s inattention and his unwavering commitment to his profession. And Jace was equally committed. He knew of no other way. He couldn’t imagine subjecting the vibrant woman he held in his arms to the same pain his beloved mother had experienced.

Maddie deserved a man who could focus on her. A man who could give freely of himself, not in drips and drabs, but completely.

He should stop the dance now—release Maddie and get on his with his life.

Maddie glanced up at him, and his lusty reaction chased off the thought. Her eyes gleamed in the moonlight. She was so beautiful. Unable to resist, he nuzzled her hair, inhaling the aroma of flowers and rain. A thrum of sensations pulsed through his veins. He had one more night, one more chance to enjoy this thing they shared. Whatever it was. And, heaven help him, he would take it.

He stopped, reaching for her hand. Ignoring her surprised expression, he led her around the corner of the veranda, then pulled her into the shadows. He kissed her. Hard.

The soft moan behind her lips spurred his desire to have her. He ran his hands down her sides, over the swell of her hips. She pressed her body to his, urging him closer.

“Jace?”

“Hmm?”

“I’ve something to tell you.”

Caressing her bottom, he kneaded and squeezed. Conversation was the last thing on his mind as he pulled her to his hardness. His time with her was running out with each passing moment, and it was all he could do not to toss up her skirts and take her, hard and fast, against the wall. “Later.” He nibbled her ear. “Let’s talk later.”

She nodded, lolling her head to the kisses he trailed on her neck. Her skin tasted so good. He seized her mouth, wanting more. Delving into the warm depths of her, he kissed her with a force he couldn’t control.

The sound of laughter carried from around the corner. He drew his lips from her mouth and pressed them to her ear.

His attempt to whisper came out in a growl. “Meet me in my room at midnight.”

“Midnight,” she sighed, breathless.

He reluctantly released her, then led her toward the door. Her lips shimmered with his kiss as they stepped inside the ballroom. And he was weak with desire.

* * * *

Maddie had less than an hour before she was due to meet Jace. After attending to some last-minute wedding details with Amelia, she slipped out the side exit of the hotel, clutching the apple she’d plucked from the bowl of fruit displayed in the lobby.

Despite her best efforts, she’d failed to talk herself out of helping Mr. Belden’s injured horse. The disaster with Dolly was still fresh in Maddie’s mind, a nagging warning she couldn’t ignore. But the crisis with the horse was worth the risk. She was given this ability for a reason, and if there was a chance she could save the poor animal, she had to take it.

Hoping no one would spot her, she gauged the distance to the large barn where the horse was stabled. She glanced around, counted to three, and then hurried across the moonlit lawn. The chirp of crickets echoed on the lake. Frogs croaked near the shore. Quickening her pace, she arrived breathless and undetected at the barn.

She pulled open the heavy door, then ducked inside. After allowing a moment for her eyes to adjust to the shadowy dimness, she treaded a path of moonlight streaming in from the small windows above. The pungent smell of manure grew stronger as she neared the long row of occupied stalls.

She located the injured horse, distinguishing it by the white dressing that was wrapped above its right front hoof. Unable to bear weight on the injured leg, the horse stood with its hoof raised slightly off the hay-covered floor.

Maddie tilted her head in sorrow. “You’re a handsome fellow, aren’t you?” she cooed. Reaching over the stall door, she held out the apple, grimacing as the horse limped toward her. With a whiff, the horse snatched the treat from her hand. “Poor boy.” She stroked his soft neck as he chewed.

A horse in the adjoining stall whinnied, and Maddie all but jumped from her skin. She inhaled a deep breath of hay and manure. “I’m more skittish than you are,” she murmured against the injured horse’s wet nose. Her hesitation to act increased with her mounting fear of discovery. Her botched attempt to help Dolly heightened this fear. Maddie could leave now—leave this poor creature to its fate—and return, safe and sound, to her room. She took another long breath for courage. “Promise not to tell?”

As if in reply, the horse reared its large head. Its dark eyes met hers, and she knew what to do. She peeled off her gloves, then unlatched the stall door.

* * * *

One excruciatingly long hour after their dance, Maddie still hadn’t arrived at Jace’s room. Maintaining discretion was imperative, but what the hell was keeping her? He shrugged on his coat and headed toward the staircase to Maddie’s room. His body tightened with anticipation. Kissing her as he had, touching her again, had spiked a longing inside him that had only grown stronger as the hour had passed.