The Measure of a Heart (8 page)

But it wasn’t “her” world. It was the world of Reverend and Mrs. Angus. The world of the Willoughbys. The world of Austin Barker and the other young men who soon would be taking up the challenge of the ministry. Anna felt a sadness steal through her whenever she thought of this new world.

She had not been home for long when she received a letter from Pastor Barker. He had been given his assignment. Excitement spilled out from the words on the page. He would be starting one of those new churches in a small town called Carlhaven. Anna left her room and entered the kitchen to ask her father where Carlhaven was and learned that it was a little town, roughly forty miles away, but forty miles to Anna seemed like a very long way.

“Used to be called Carl’s Haven when my pa was a boy,” went on her father. “Fellow by the name of Carl Pearson settled there. Liked the spot, I guess, to give it such a name. Name got changed some over the years. When the town finally put up its little sign over the railroad station, they forgot the s and just made it one word.”

Anna was glad for the bit of information. She wondered if Pastor Barker knew that piece of local history. She decided that she would pass it on to him in her next letter. She went back to her room to finish reading.

“I am to start right away,” he enthused. “I can hardly wait to see if ‘the preaching of the Gospel’ works as well in practice as it does in theory.”

Forty miles. He would be forty miles away preaching the Gospel. Anna began to pray for him and his new church every night.

The Anguses did retire. A new pastor and his wife were sent to their little community. It was the first pastorate for Reverend and Mrs. John Clouse. They brought with them enthusiasm and plans for growth, and Anna enjoyed her trips with the milk deliveries in spite of the fact that she missed the Anguses.

She had just returned home from one of those deliveries when Mr. Trent came in the door from a trip to town and handed Anna a letter. She had just received a letter from Austin Barker and couldn’t imagine two coming so close together, so she looked at the handwriting and realized at once that it was not from him. But in the corner of the envelope was an unknown address, and there above it was the name, plain as day, “Barker.”

Anna frowned as she tore open the envelope. Was someone trying to play a strange trick on her? She certainly knew Pastor Barker’s handwriting after all the years of correspondence.

But the letter was signed simply, Austin’s mother. Anna’s frown deepened. She did hope nothing had happened to Austin.

It was so nice to meet you after hearing about you for so many months. I must say that I was a bit surprised, as our son had described you as a young girl—but as he said, two years does make a big difference. I must admit that I was rather pleased to find you a young lady. And a kind and gracious one at that. We do want to keep in touch.

As you can imagine, mothers are rather protective of their offspring, especially the baby of the family, and Austin is my “baby.” Yet I thank God that He has called him into the ministry. I know there will be many difficult things for him in the future, but I can honestly say that I trust God to lead him as He wills.

I am sorry that so many miles separate us. It would have been so much nicer for my husband and me if God had called Austin to serve nearby instead of almost a thousand miles away. He’s not awfully good about letter writing, either. Perhaps it is unfair of me to ask, but it would mean so much to me if you could drop us a line now and then and sort of pass on to us what is going on in his life—as well as your own, of course.

We were so delighted to meet you. We have thought of you as our Anna for many months and hope that we may always do so. May God bless and lead you in all your future plans.

Lovingly,
Austin’s mother

Anna’s frown deepened. It was such a strange letter. Why was Mrs. Barker asking her to keep in touch? And why was she assuming that Anna would be able to pass on information about her son?

It was true that they were still writing, but Anna was sure that soon his new ministry would be taking more and more of his time, until writing letters to a young girl who was interested in theology would be laid aside.

It all was very puzzling.

But, Anna mentally added the senior Barkers to her list of people, like Pastor and Mrs. Angus, to whom she wrote.

Unexpectedly to Anna, over the months that followed, Austin’s letters came more often rather than less frequently. Anna waited for every one, as it told of the young pastor’s ministry in the new town. She prayed earnestly for the names that appeared on the paper. She felt anguish as the building they had hoped to purchase went up in flames and another place had to be sought. She grieved when an elderly parishioner, Austin’s prayer warrior, passed away.

In a strange way, Austin’s ministry was also her own. She shared the joys, the disappointments. She sensed the triumphs and the struggles. She prayed as she had never prayed before, even though forty miles separated them.

“I would like to see you,” Austin wrote in one letter, causing Anna’s heart to race. “I hope to borrow a team to come over. The train would take forever as we are on two different lines. I’d have to go on into Cabot and then on out again. It would be time-consuming and costly. So I thought that I would try to drive over. Is any time better than another? I really would like to make it as soon as possible.”

Anna answered quickly and assured the young minister that he would be welcomed at any time. That same week he arrived. Anna was unprepared and was embarrassed that he found her feeding the hens in her faded cotton.

But he didn’t seem to notice. He smiled and held out his hands to her.

“How are you?” he asked and she smiled shyly in response. “You look more like the little girl I remember,” he teased, tugging gently on one of her braids.

She nodded. Her fine garments were hanging on wall pegs, a worn-out cotton sheet secured about them to keep off the dust.

“I must look a mess,” Anna managed. “Not at all,” he said softly. “I—I think that you look—quite—”

But Anna did not want to hear his assessment. She quickly turned toward the house and interrupted his statement.

“Come to the house. I’ll put on the coffee. Mama has just finished taking fresh bread from the oven. I remember how you used to enjoy it when I’d bring a loaf to the parsonage with the milk.”

He turned to follow her.

“Do you still deliver milk?” he asked as they moved toward the kitchen together.

“Oh yes. If I have the time. I enjoy the stroll. But sometimes one of the boys takes it.”

“Do you have a delivery to make tonight?”

She looked at him. What was he asking?

“Yes,” she answered truthfully. “I had planned to go right after the supper hour. But I can stay here and send my brother—”

“Oh no. I’d like you to go. I mean—if you don’t mind, I’d like to go along with you.”

“Of course,” responded Anna, remembering that he knew the new pastor and his wife. It was only reasonable that he would want the chance to chat with them. Maybe that was his reason for this visit.

They reached the kitchen and Pastor Barker was welcomed by Anna’s mother.

“So good to see you again!” she exclaimed, shaking his hand heartily. “How are things going in that new church?
We’ve been remembering you every day in our prayer time.”

Austin thanked her sincerely and began to give her snatches of news about his new community, his church, and his parishioners.

Anna moved about the kitchen, preparing the coffee and the fresh bread and jam. But she listened intently as she worked. It was good to have a firsthand report.

“I think I’ll go out to the field and walk in with your father,” Austin said as the supper hour drew near.

Anna nodded. She supposed that it was terribly boring for a man to hang around the kitchen while supper was being prepared.

“He’s in the west field,” she responded, and the young man picked up his hat and left the room.

“He’s a fine young man,” observed her mother as soon as Austin had left them. Anna nodded. He was a fine young man. But he needed a wife. Needed a good wife to help him in his ministry. It was not easy for a man to work alone. Anna had been praying privately that God would provide the right young woman for Pastor Barker. Someone to work as a helpmate. Someone to help carry his load.

At the same time that Anna prayed, she knew that a woman coming into Austin’s life would mean that she would be gently pushed out. She would miss him—dreadfully. But it was a small price to pay for furthering the effectiveness of his ministry. Anna would ache for a while—but she would still pray.

He was the one who lifted the two pails of milk as they started their journey toward the town manse. Anna’s hands felt strangely empty. She didn’t know what to do with them, so she tucked them in her apron pockets. She had meant to lay her apron aside, but she had forgotten. At least it was her newest apron, worn over a rather attractive blue gingham. She had changed before supper and had loosened her braids and pinned her hair up, too. She did look less of a child, she’d decided, but her eyes still looked too big for her face and her nose was too long.

If Austin thought so, he made no comment. He’d only smiled when he saw her working about the supper table when he’d come in with her pa.

“Do you still miss the Anguses?” he asked her as they walked together.

“Yes,” she answered truthfully. “It’s not that I don’t like the new minister. I guess . . . I guess I was just so used to—” She broke off her thoughts and then continued. “Do you know that the Anguses had been here ever since I was a little girl?
To me they are . . . they are the living example of what—what a minister . . . and his wife should be.”

He nodded in understanding.

“And now this new couple,” he said with understanding, “it’s like . . . like a new marriage. You have to work out a totally new relationship.”

Anna laughed. “Well, it is a new relationship,” she admitted. “Having never been married, I can’t speak for that marriage part.”

“I’d like to change that.”

Anna’s head came up from the dust that lifted around her feet. She looked at him directly. Evenly. What was he saying?