Therapy (8 page)

As he waited for his heart to slow to an acceptable rate, he realized it would take a supreme amount of concentration to focus on Anna's words. He was experiencing the kind of frazzled fatigue and achey lethargy that generally came from partying all night. Worse still, it felt as if the back of his skull was being squeezed in a vice. He clutched his head to stop the pounding and gazed at the sea.

The crashing waves were an inky blue, darkening by the minute as clouds accumulated overhead. Visibility was already restricted to two nautical miles and the horizon seemed to be creeping steadily closer to the shore.

Viktor studied Anna's reflection in the window. She poured herself a cup of tea and waited for him to begin.
He angled his chair towards her. ‘I'd like to pick up where we left off, if I may.’

‘Of course.’

Anna raised the delicate cup to her mouth and Viktor wondered whether her lipstick, a conservative shade of red, would leave a smudge on the Meissen china.

‘You said that Charlotte left without telling her parents.’

‘That's right.’

My daughter wasn't a runaway
, thought Viktor. After pondering the matter all night, he had come to the conclusion that there had to be more to Josy's disappearance than a childish attempt to run away from home.
She simply wasn't the sort
.

‘Charlotte set out on a quest to discover the cause of her illness,’ said Anna. ‘That's the gist of the story – or the opening twenty-three pages at least. A little girl falls ill, can't be cured, and runs away from home. That's as far as I got.’

‘You said you weren't able to finish the story. Why do you think that was?’

‘Just the usual, I'm afraid. I ran out of inspiration and abandoned the project. I saved the opening chapters in a folder on my computer and didn't give them another thought.’

‘Until Charlotte showed up.’

‘Exactly. Her appearance marked a turning point. I wasn't new to schizophrenia – I'd seen colours, heard
voices, met characters from my stories, but Charlotte was different. This time the hallucination was incredibly real.’

Because it wasn't a hallucination?

Viktor raised his cup and wondered whether the bitter taste came from the tea or from the nasal spray that he was using to clear his catarrh. Even his taste buds had been affected by his cold.

‘You said that Charlotte was nearly run over by a car.’

‘Yes, that was the first time I saw her.’

‘Where did you take her after that?’

‘It was the other way round,’ said Anna firmly. ‘
She
took me. I just followed.’

‘How would you explain her motivation?’

‘She wanted to know why her story only had two chapters. She said, “I want to be well again. What happens next?” She told me to finish the book.’

‘In other words, you were instructed to keep writing by a character created by you?’

‘Precisely. In any case, I was perfectly honest with her. I told her I didn't know how the story ended, so there was nothing I could do.’

‘What did she say to that?’

‘She took me by the hand and promised to show me where the story started. She said, “Maybe you'll think of an ending when you see where it all began.”’

Where what began?

‘Where did she take you?’ he asked.

‘I don't know the name of the place, but we drove for a while to get there. It was a bit of a blur.’

‘Tell me in as much detail as you can.’

‘We went back to my car and joined the motorway heading west. God knows which exit we took. The main thing I remember is that Charlotte was strapped in. Crazy, isn't it? My imaginary character was afraid of getting hurt. The absurdity of it struck me at the time.’

To Viktor, it made perfect sense. Josy had been taught by her mother to wear a seat belt at all times.

‘How long did it take to get there?’

‘Over an hour. We went through a little village. I remember seeing some old buildings – Russian architecture, I think.’

Viktor stiffened, waiting nervously for what he was about to hear. He was gripping his seat like a patient at the dentist's.

‘There was a Russian Orthodox chapel on a hill in some woods. We crossed a bridge, continued for a couple of kilometres on the road, then turned on to a forest track.’

He listened incredulously.
No
. . .

‘We drove another kilometre and stopped in a narrow lane. I parked the car.’

No, there's no way on earth that
. . .

Viktor had to force himself not to leap out of his chair and shout at the top of his voice. He knew the place she was describing. He had driven there most weekends.

‘Where did you go after that?’

‘We walked down a path. We had to go in single file, but I could see she was taking me to a building. It was a little wooden house, like a cabin only nicer. It couldn't have been located in a more beautiful spot.’

A log cabin in a clearing
. His thoughts were coming faster than Anna's words.

‘It was the only house for miles. The forest went on forever; evergreens, beeches and birch. Some of the trees had shed their leaves, and there was a springy carpet of richly coloured autumn foliage on the ground. The weather was cold for November, but there was a cosiness to the place. At the time it seemed real, but everything was so luminously beautiful that I can't help wondering whether it was part of the delusion – like Charlotte.’

Viktor was wondering the same. It was hard to know which explanation would be preferable. Did he want Anna's hallucinations to be connected to his daughter's disappearance? Or was it better to think that the parallels were coincidental? He had to be careful about projecting his memories of Josy on to Anna's story. After all, the cabin she was describing wasn't necessarily his. There were scores of similar properties all over the Havelland.

He knew exactly how to find out.

‘So you and Charlotte were standing outside the cabin. What could you hear?’

Anna looked at him doubtfully. ‘Do you think it will help with my therapy?’

No, but I need to know
.

‘Yes,’ he lied.

‘Nothing. I couldn't hear a thing. I remember thinking how quiet it was. It was like being at the top of the tallest mountain with nothing for miles.’

Viktor acknowledged her answer with an earnest nod, barely controlling the urge to bang his head wildly like a heavy metal fan. It was exactly what he had expected her to say. He knew beyond a doubt where Charlotte had taken Anna. Sacrow Forest, midway between Spandau and Potsdam, was renowned for its tranquillity. The stillness was the first thing that city dwellers noticed about the place.

Anna seemed to guess his next question. ‘I asked Charlotte where we were, but she obviously thought I should know. “Don't you recognize the house?” she said crossly. “We used to come here most weekends, especially in the summer. I had my last good day in this cabin – before it went wrong.”’

‘Before what went wrong?’ probed Viktor.

‘I assumed she was talking about her illness, but I didn't like to ask. The subject seemed to make her angry. “You're the novelist,” she said irritably, pointing to the cabin. “Something happened in there, and it's your job to write it down!”’

‘Did you?’

‘I had to find out what had happened. Charlotte had made it clear that she intended to plague me until I finished the book, but I couldn't very well describe the
cabin without going inside. I broke the glass in the back door and walked in.’

Josy let her break into the cabin? Why didn't she use the spare key?

‘I thought I'd be able to find out what was making Charlotte ill.’

‘And did you?’

‘No. I didn't know what to look for. I was surprised by the size of the cabin. I was expecting to find three small rooms, but there was a spacious kitchen, two bathrooms, a lounge with a fireplace and a couple of bedrooms at least.’

Three
, he corrected her silently.

‘I went through all the cupboards and drawers – I looked everywhere, literally everywhere, including the toilet cistern. It didn't take long because the place was pretty bare. The furniture was expensive – but plain.’

Isabell's choice: Philippe Starck and some quality Bauhaus
.

‘Did Charlotte come with you?’ asked Viktor.

‘She refused to cross the threshold. Whatever had happened must have been really traumatic. I hunted about inside while she stood on the porch and shouted instructions.’

‘Can you give me an example?’

‘It was all a bit cryptic. She said things like, “Don't look for what you can see; search for what's missing!”’

‘Did she explain what she meant?’

‘No. I wanted to ask her, but there was no time for questions.’

‘What happened?’

‘I don't like to talk about it, Dr Larenz.’

‘It's important to try.’

The hesitation in her eyes reminded Viktor of how she had clammed up completely the previous day.

‘Can we talk about it tomorrow?’ she said pleadingly. ‘I want to go home.’

‘That wouldn't be wise. It's better to get it over with.’ He was shocked at himself for deceiving a patient. Anna had come to him for therapy, but this was an inquisition.

There was silence while Anna considered.

At first he was sure that she would stand up and leave, but then she placed her hands in her lap and sighed.

13

‘I hadn't noticed the light was fading,’ she continued, ‘but suddenly I couldn't see a thing. It was probably only half past four – sundown was pretty early at that time of year. In any event, it was dark in the cabin, so I went back to the sitting room, borrowed a lighter from the mantelpiece and used the radiance from the small flame to light my way down the hall. At the far end was a door I hadn't noticed before. It looked like a broom cupboard or something.’

Josy's room
.

‘I wanted to take a closer look, but then I heard voices.’

‘What sort of voices?’

‘Actually, it was a single voice, a man's voice. He wasn't talking; he was crying. It sounded as if he was whimpering to himself. The noise was coming from the room at the end of the hall.’

‘How could you tell?’

‘The whimpering got louder as I approached.’

‘Weren't you frightened?’

‘I managed to stay calm for a bit, but then Charlotte started screaming.’

‘Why?’ asked Viktor hoarsely. He could feel the rawness in his throat when he talked.

‘She wanted me to leave. She was yelling at the top of her voice, “He's coming! He's coming!”’

‘Who did she mean?’

‘I don't know. In the same moment that Charlotte started shouting, the whimpering stopped. I was right outside the door and the handle was moving. I felt a draught and the lighter went out. Then a terrifying thought occurred to me.’

‘What?’

‘The danger that Charlotte was warning me about had been there all along.’

The telephone rang. Viktor, who was itching to ask the next question, hurried to the kitchen to take the call. The touch-tone phone had been installed at Isabell's insistence. She refused to stay in a house without a modern phone.

‘Hi. I'm not sure whether this is good news or bad,’ said Kai without preamble.

‘Just be quick,’ whispered Viktor, not wanting Anna to overhear.

‘OK, the traffic accident: I put one of my best fellows on it, and I made a few enquiries myself. We know two things for certain. First, a couple of cars rear-ended on Uhlandstrasse on the afternoon of November 26.’

Viktor's heart missed a beat, only to speed up alarmingly.

‘Second, it had nothing to do with your daughter's abduction.’

‘What makes you so sure?’

‘A guy stumbled into the road and nearly got run over. According to the witnesses, he was drunk. There was no sign of any kid.’

‘You're saying that . . .’

‘I'm saying that schizophrenic or not, your patient had nothing to do with our problem.’

‘Josy isn't a problem.’

‘No, of course not. I'm sorry, Viktor. I didn't mean it that way.’

‘It's all right, Kai, I shouldn't have taken offence. I just thought we were finally getting somewhere.’

‘I know how distressing this is for you.’

No you don't
, thought Viktor. He wouldn't wish that fate on anyone. Kai had no idea what it was like to lose everything, to feel so wretched that every glimmer of hope seemed dazzlingly bright.

‘Did they find the guy?’

‘Which guy?’

‘The drunk guy. Did they question him?’

‘No, but that doesn't change the fact that no one saw a woman or a kid. The same facts came up in all the witness statements: a drunk man staggered across the road and disappeared into the car park at the Kudamm-Karree mall. He was gone before anyone asked for his details. You know how crowded it gets in those superstores. Who's to say that he wasn't buying himself a—’

‘It's all right, Kai, I understand. I appreciate your help, but I should probably go now.’

‘Is your mental patient there?’

‘Yes. She's in the other room.’

‘You've been cross-examining her again, haven't you?’

‘Yes.’

‘I might have guessed. Well you can leave me out of it. Next you'll be telling me that you've found a new lead. I suppose you've found some more parallels?’

‘Maybe.’

‘OK, Doc, here's what happens next. You throw her out. Whoever she is, she's not doing you any good. You said you were going to Parkum to get some peace. You should be looking after yourself, not her. There are plenty of other shrinks who could help her.’

‘I can't send her back to the mainland until the weather clears up. And I can't just throw her out!’

‘Then tell her not to bother you any more.’

Viktor knew that Kai was right. He had left Berlin in the hope of getting closure, but Josy was still at the forefront of his mind. And there were parts of Anna's story that didn't make sense. He had heard what he wanted to hear and forgotten about the rest. Josy was twelve, not nine. She wasn't the type to run away from home, and she knew where to find the key to the cabin. She wouldn't let a stranger vandalize their door.

‘Well?’