Through Smoke: The Troubled Heroes Series (26 page)

“Are you high?” Michael broke the silence.

Casey shook his head no.  “No man, I’m not high.” He strolled to the kitchen.  “You got something to eat?”

Michael stepped in front of Casey, blocking his path.  Eva wasn’t sure what was going to happen, but she personally didn’t want to witness a fight between brothers. 

“What in the hell are you doing here, Casey?”

Casey stepped back, arching his eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“Do you even realize the hell that I’ve… we’ve gone through this past week?” He pointed toward Eva.  “All because of you and your major fuck up?”

“I’m not following you, Mikey.”

Michael laughed a sarcastic laugh. “You’re kidding me right? You really have no idea?”  Michael glanced back at Eva, almost like he was apologizing for what was about to transpire.  “You make a deal with a bookie.  You screw it up.  You get me involved, which gets not only me, but Darryl and Eva involved too.  Viper killed Darryl a few days ago in a fire.  Now he’s spying on Eva and
me.
  And here comes Casey who has been in hiding, back out in the open for God knows how long, only to disappear again when shit starts hitting the fan. Do you get what I’m saying now?”  Michael prodded his index finger into Casey’s chest with enough force to make him step backward.

“He’s gonna kill me, Mikey.” It was a whisper, but Eva could hear every word.

Michael arched his eyebrow, and for a split second, Eva could swear he was going to deck Casey.  “So, you hide away and don’t face it like a man, making other guys take the fall for your problem.  Did you not hear me? Darryl is dead, so someone has already died because of this.  And it’s not over! Viper is still after me because of you.  So as always, thanks for starting the fire but disappear when it’s time to do something about it. It’s like you’ve been since we were kids.”

Casey looked down at the floor.  “I had no idea it would get this bad.”

“Well it has, Casey. It has.”  Michael walked past him, allowing his shoulder to collide with Casey’s.  “No, I don’t have any food.  I don’t have anything you want here.”

Casey grabbed Michael’s arm before he could get back to the living room.  “What do I need to do?”

“Honestly, I don’t think anything else can be done.  You’re a little late, wouldn’t you say?”

“I can make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone else.”

Michael laughed again. His sarcasm toward his brother was like nails on a chalkboard to Eva.  “I’ll believe that when I see it, Casey. Not once have you gotten my back.  I don’t expect you to start now.”  Michael jerked his arm away from Casey’s grasp.  “Get out of my apartment.  Unless you’re here to man up, I don’t want to see you.”

Chapter Sixteen

Michael woke up the next day frustrated and confused.  Eva had spent the night with him again, but had another shift at seven and was gone for the next twelve hours.  He was thankful for her help and sacrifice in being here for him, but he needed some time away from her.  Maybe it was a good thing he was on suspension until the psychologist released him to work.  He figured she would take her sweet time in talking to the captain. 

Groaning, he rolled over and stared at the alarm clock.  He had slept off and on all night and dozed a little after Eva had left around six forty five.  It was now eight thirty and he had no agenda for the day.  The shrink hadn’t set another appointment and he really didn’t feel like dealing with that right now anyway. 
He thought about Janice and Braden and how they probably needed help around their apartment.  He grew nauseous at that thought.  He wasn’t ready to face them yet even though he promised he’d come around.  It was still an open wound that needed to heal.  

His cell phone rang, jolting him upward from the mattress.  He propped himself up on his elbows and squinted at the screen, glaring at the unknown number.  He usually didn’t answer those, but due to recent circumstances he made exceptions.

“Hello?”

“McGinnis, this is Detective Matson. I was just giving you a heads up on your situation.  We have several police units driving your neighborhood, patrolling areas and looking for a man by Viper’s description.”

Michael kicked his legs over the side of the bed and sat on the edge.  “He’ll just go missing again while you guys are around.  We gotta catch him off guard.  He’s not exactly gonna come around when a car with NYPD painted across the side is hovering around."

“We understand that, but right now we are going to try this and see if the simplest will be the most effective.  We gotta try all options before we go balls out and screw it up even worse.”

Michael peeked through the blinds in his window, looking down at the street.  He had perfect timing. A blue and white NYPD RMP drove right in front of his complex.  “Okay Detective, this is your area of expertise, not mine.”

Matson let out a laugh and Michael wasn’t sure if he was being sarcastic or not.  “Okay McGinnis, I just don’t want you thinking we’ve neglected you.  We’ll get him.  Call if anything happens and I’ll do the same to you.”

“Okay.”  He hung up the phone and tossed it on the nightstand, eyeing the street a few more seconds.  He had to get out of the house, even out of Hell’s Kitchen for that matter.  Going to Midtown sounded okay, but that place was heavily blanketed with tourists, especially this time of day.  Sighing, he decided to start the day with a shower and go from there.

After his shower, he felt somewhat more refreshed.  Michael rummaged through the refrigerator but came to the conclusion that he wasn’t hungry and food just made his stomach churn.  It had been that way since Darryl’s death.  He really hadn’t eaten a full meal since that morning before the fire. He was
out of his
routine and felt worthless.  He had to have his job to function and right now he just felt like a lazy low life. 

Glancing at his phone, he scanned through the contacts and stopped on his mom.  He had promised her he would go visit her more often.  A few weeks had passed since the last time he had gone up to Queens.  He glanced up at the clock on the wall and nodded his head.  She should be home at this time.  He could call and see, but he wanted to surprise her.  The visit wasn’t just going to be for her, though.  He needed advice and help, stuff that Eva could never help with. 

Smoothing his hair over, he found an FDNY baseball cap and put it on.  He fought off the butterflies he was feeling in his stomach and made his way to the subway station at the end of the block.  The ride up to Queens took about thirty minutes if he didn’t take the express train.  At that time of day, nothing was express. 

He eyed several passengers, some young, and some old.  Some seemed lonely and depressed and others were so lost in each other’s eyes it made him sick.  There were obvious tourists who had their large fold up maps spread out as they searched where they were g
oing.  Their cameras dangled fro
m their necks, just making them seem like they were begging to get mugged.  There was no shocker to Michael when
a lot of them got on the subway at the Times Square stop
.  That was one reason
he seldom
went to Midtown.  He would never understand how someone would stand out in the middle of a busy street during rush hour traffic to get “the” shot of the ticker going across the edge of buildings and risk being made into a pancake by a taxi or bus.  Yeah, that was smart.

Michael was so deep in thought that he didn’t notice a couple of girls sitting adjacent to him.  They looked no older than twenty and both giggled when he made eye contact with them.  He pulled the bill down over his face and tried to ignore them, but their blatant staring and flirting was annoying.  From what he observed, they looked like two girls from Jersey, over in the city to get into any trouble they could find. 

“Excuse me sir, but can I ask you something?”

He looked up from under his hat bill. “What?”

She tucked her dark hair behind her ear and leaned forward, pushing her chest out to try and accentuate her breasts.  “Are you really a firefighter?”

Michael nodded.  “Yes.” 

“Oh, we like firemen.” Another giggle echoed throughout the train.  “What’s your name?”

Michael sighed and stood up as the train approached the next stop.  It was three stops too early but that was okay.  The walk wouldn’t be that bad.  His mom’s house would only be about ten blocks from here and the exercise would do him some good. 

“Gosh, don’t talk so much. I guess they were right about New Yorkers.”

Michael ignored the last comment and exited the train.  He wasn’t in the mood for people.  Taking the subway was of course, a bad idea, but cheaper than a cab would be any day.  The fresh air hit him hard as he trudged up the steps and out of the subway.  Despite living there his whole life, he never would get used to the musty stench of them.  The air was cool and pleasant, making the last leg of his walk relaxing. 

He paused as he approached his mom’s house.  He could see through the front window that the TV was on, so he knew she was there.  Heart racing, he walked up to the front steps and tapped his knuckles on the hard wood.  Why was he so nervous when it came to seeing his mom?  He had to make up for all of those years he resented her and ran all over her. Now was the perfect time to finally bond with her and try to get some of that relationship back.

He heard footsteps and the hinges creak on the door.  His mom stood on the other side, her confused expression suddenly changing to a genuine smile when she realized it was him on her doorstep.  “Michael! Honey!” She pulled him in for a tight hug, probably one of the tightest he had ever felt from anyone.  “What brings you up here?”

“I just… I just wanted to see you, Mom.” 

“Well good gosh, come on in.”  She grabbed his hand and guided him to the kitchen.  “You want somethi
ng to drink? I’ve got some soda
s, water, lemonade, tea.”

Michael ran his hand over the back of his neck.  “Tea will be fine.” 

She grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it with ice.  As she worked, she talked over her shoulder.  “You sure something’s not bugging you?”

Despite the fact that he hardly saw his mother, she could still hone in on his emotions without him even having to say anything.  “I wish something wasn’t bugging me.”

She slid the glass to him and they sat at the kitchen table.  She watched as he drank, both silent for a few moments.  “I heard about that firefighter who recently died in Hell’s Kitchen.  Got me thinking about you.  Did you know him?”

Her question seemed so innocent toward the entire situation as a whole. There was so little she knew.  “Yeah, he was part of my company.  One of my best friends.”

She nodded and a look of sorrow and concern flashed across her face.  “That’s such a shame.  No one should have to go through what I’m sure his family is going through.  And here you are going through it twice.”  She grabbed his hand and squeezed.  “Is there anything I can do?”

Michael scooted the iced tea back and forth between his hands, scared to let his guard down but knew that he needed to.  “I need some advice.”

“Well hon, you know I’m full of advice.”

Michael let out a low laugh.  If only he could tell her the story in
its
entirety, including Viper and what truly caused the fire that killed Darryl.  He would never do that to her though.  She had enough to worry about with Casey. 

“Dad died when I was fourteen.  It was hard and I was confused and upset.  I had these emotions I never want to feel again.  Now I lost Darryl and its all back again, it just feels one hundred times worse for some reason.”  He paused and sipped what was left of his drink. “I loved dad and I’m not meaning any disrespect to him, but Darryl’s death has torn me up more than I can even describe.” 

“I don’t think you are disrespecting your dad at all.  You’re older now and have grown up.  Emotions change.  That’s understandable.”

Michael nodded, unable to look up and make eye contact with her.  “I guess what I’m trying to say is, how do you finally get past all of the anger and negative emotions that follow a death like this?”

His mom contemplated the question for a moment.  The subtle ticking of the second hand on the clock near them was all Michael could hear.  “Michael, there’s really no one way to answer that.  I guess, and I know this sounds cliché, but the best solution is time.  It takes time. Death is hard on us because we are left without the person, but you gotta remember deep inside that the person who passed away is happy and in a better place. That allows some comfort for us, even if not at first, it will.”