Uncontrollable (31 page)

 I lift her face to mine. “I’m sorry, Angel,” I
whisper before giving her a soft kiss. “I’m so sorry.” I rest my head on hers
and let the tears fall.

They admitted her for the
night. Not because she is still unconscious. Not because she has injuries that
need surgery or head trauma that needs to be further assessed. Her sexual
assault test also came back negative. Other than the reminders on her body, she
is perfect.

 They had to admit her because she’s pregnant.

 Pregnant!

I tell myself again. It seems unreal but makes
sense. Explains why she has been so tired and somewhat moody.

 They had run some blood work to verify that she
was given ketamine. In running other tests with that, they discovered she was
pregnant. They wanted to admit her overnight and run further tests regarding
the baby in the morning.

 I’m going to be a father, and I can’t even hold my
fiancée and tell her she’s going to be a mother. Jax took that from us.

I sit next to her hospital bed as we wait for her
to wake up. We’ve been here for over an hour, and she’s still out of it. They
offered to give her another drug to reverse the ketamine and wake her up
sooner. But as soon as they started talking about the possibilities of her
having a seizure, I said absolutely not. No way would I risk her or our child
more harm.

 I watch as Tate stands over by the window. Every
time the nurse comes in she tries to check his cut, but he pushes her away,
refusing treatment. He’s marked up pretty bad on his hands and arms, but his
chest is the worse. I can see the cut from here. It looks deep, it even
continues to still bleed some. He moves slowly and continues to place his hand
on it. I know it’s hurting him, he just doesn’t want to leave her side, and I
can’t blame him.

 He just seems out of it. He is probably wishing
that he would have just stabbed him in the heart. I know I am.

“She’s going to be okay,” I say running my hand
over her matted hair. It’s still got dirt and blood in it. I can only imagine
that’s from Jax dragging her around and fisting his hands in it.

 He shakes his head. “This should have never
happened in the first place,” he growls. “I should have killed him the first
time he put her in the hospital.”

 “He’s taken care of now.” I had gotten a phone
call from Parker. Jax was arrested for drug possession, kidnapping, and parole
violation. I finally got my answer to why he never called or didn’t know that I
was with her. He has been in jail the last few months in Georgia. Turns out
once he made bail, he came back.

 “Yeah, at Sam’s expense.” He points to her as she
lies in the hospital bed.

 Just then a nurse walks in. She’s about Angel’s
height and has light brown hair cut at her shoulders. She’s been our nurse
since we’ve been here. Her pink scrubs make me think of bubblegum every time
she comes around.

She stops and looks over at Tate. “Are you sure you
don’t want me to take a look at that? At least put a bandage on it, if you
don’t want stitches.”

“I’m fine,” he says coldly while glaring at her.

 She nods and then looks over at me. “How is she
doing?” she asks before she turns her attention to Angel.

I sigh running a hand through my hair. “The same.”
Can’t she fucking tell she’s still asleep? “She needs to wake up.” It’s been
over six hours since she was taken.

The nurse offers a small smile. “We can wait a
little longer.” She looks over to the machines that Angel is connected to and
the IV bag that is hanging by her bed. “Her vitals are good, and she’s getting
fluids. We can allow her time to come off the ketamine on her own.”

 I nod my head and grab Angel’s hand. We sit in the
silence, and I try to keep my eyes open. I’m past rage, I’m past terrified—I’m
just plain exhausted.

 I lay my head down on the bed beside her arm. I
take in a deep breath and try to relax.

 That’s when I feel it. I lift up and look down at
her hand in mine. And I stare, my heart beating wildly. “Come on Angel,” I
whisper getting Tate’s attention.

 He turns to face us and watches as I watch her
hand. And then it happens again. She moves her hand in mine.

 “She’s waking up,” I say letting out a long
breath. I stand and place my other hand on her head. “Angel? I’m right here,
honey.” I smile as I feel a tear run down my cheek. Relief, I’ve never felt
anything like it. “I’m right here, baby.”

She tilts her head slowly and her face scrunches.
She winces. “Slade?”

 Her words are slurred but she spoke. That’s all I
want.

 I let out a soft sob. “Yes, baby. I’m here.”

 Her heavy eyes open slowly, and she looks up at
the ceiling to her room. “What...? Where am I?” Her voice is hoarse.

They said there was no way to know what she would
remember. Honestly, I hope she doesn’t remember any of it. It would be better
that way.

 “The hospital,” I respond, trying not to lose my
shit.

 The nurse walks back in and smiles. “You’re
awake.” She comes to stand next to her bed. “How do you feel?”

Angel blinks a few times and swallows hard.
“I…okay,” she answers quietly. “Sore.” She licks her cracked lips. “Tired.”

 The nurse nods. “Can you tell me what you
remember?”

I scowl up at her, she is obviously still out of
it.

“I remember…” She pauses. “Black truck.
Jax…Larry’s,” and then it’s as if she disappears back into the moment. Her eyes
glaze over and fix on the ceiling tiles.

 Her eyes widen, and she jerks her hand out of
mine. Her eyes lock down to her ring finger, and she frantically starts to feel
it with her right hand. “He took my ring,” she says her voice rising. “I tried
to stop him...” She starts to panic.

 “No Ange...”

“Where is it?” She starts to get out of the bed.

Tate runs over to the bed, and I reach over.
“Whoa,” I say, trying to grab her without hurting her or ripping her IV out.
“It’s okay, I have it,” I try to tell her but she’s not listening.

She keeps pushing me off and throws off the
blanket. I grab her gown and pull it yanking her back onto the bed.

 “I’ll get something to sedate her,” the nurse says
running for the door.

 “No,” Angel screams and looks over at me with the
biggest, most terrified look in her eyes I’ve ever seen. It breaks my heart.
“Please don’t. Not again.” She grabs a hold of my shirt. Her fingers digging
into my chest and pulling me over into her bed.

“Okay. I won’t let them,” I tell her trying to calm
her.

 She pushes her head into my shirt and starts to
sob. “It’s okay.” I run my hand down her back as Tate stands there looking down
at her. I expect to see anger, but it’s not there. Just sadness as a tear runs
down his face.

 The nurse returns. “You’re not giving that to
her,” I snap.

She frowns. “It’s Valium, it will relax her.” Angel
lets out another sob in my chest. “It’s common for patients to have
hallucinations once they wake from what she was given.”

I shake my head. “No.” Over my dead body.

 She narrows her eyes at me as Angel continues to
cry harder and harder. “She needs it.”

Tate rubs his hands over his face quickly and then
wipes them on what’s left of his shirt. “You know...” Tate says getting the
nurses attention. She turns to face him as he reaches down and pulls his ripped
shirt up and over his head. The nurse’s brows lift to her hairline. “I think I
will take that checkup now,” he says through gritted teeth. He doesn’t want it.
He’s just trying to get her away from his sister.

 She smiles as her eyes rake over his chest and
arms, admiring his tattoos, and I’m sure his body as well. “Absolutely. Follow
me.” Then she looks back to me with narrowed eyes. “I’ll be back to check on
her.” She then leads Tate out of our room.

I try to pull away from Angel to look down at her
but she clings to me, burying her face and body to mine.

I position myself on the side of her bed and pull
her into my lap, just letting her cry it out.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

“Give me that ring.”

“No,” I shout.

 It’s gone. He has it.

“No. Please, no,” I cry.

“Shh,” I hear a voice say but it’s not Jax. It’s
much smoother, loving. “It’s okay, Angel. I’ve got you. You’re safe now,”

Angel.
Jax called me Angel.

 I try to push away from him. My body says to fight
him no matter how bad it hurts.

 “Stop,” I cry. “Let me go,” I scream trying to
push him away.

 He lets go all of a sudden, and I fall back onto
the bed. I open my eyes and look up to see baby blue eyes. The same ones I fell
in love with. “Slade?” I choke.

He stares at me with caution. “It’s me, Angel,” he
says softly and nods his head.

 Angel.
“Please don’t,” I whisper.

 He frowns. “Don’t what?”

 “Call me Angel.” Tears run down my face and my
voice shakes.

His brows scrunch together. “I always call you
Angel.”

 My breath hitches, and all I hear is Jax saying
Angel over and over. I can’t see him but I know he’s there—his hands on my
neck—choking me. His hand making my face sting as he slaps me.

 Slade raises his hand to my face, and I flinch.
“No,” I cry out.

 He snaps his hand back and stands taking a few
steps away from me. I pull my knees up to my chest and take in a few deep
breaths. I then look around the room to make sure we’re alone.

 “It’s just you and me. There’s no one else in
here,” he says softly.

I sob as I start to rock back and forth. “Where are
we?” I ask shaking.

He frowns. “You’re in the hospital. Do you remember
what for?”

I shake my head. I place my right hand over my left
hand and hold on tighter. I push my legs out and lift my hands to my face when
I feel my ring is gone. “No,” I cry. “He took my ring.”

 “
Give me that!”
Jax screams.

 Slade walks over to me and holds out his hand. “I
have it, Ang...” His stops himself. “Would you like me to put it on for you?”
he asks softly.

 I nod my head and reach out, my hand shaking. He
takes it softly and very slowly places the ring on my finger. It’s a bit
tighter than usual. My eyes catch sight of the bruises wrapping around my
wrists.

I hold out my hands to him, palms up. “Did you do
this?” I ask, tears running down my face.

His face contorts into something painful. “You
think I would hurt you like that?”

Would Slade do that to me? No.
But why are they
there?
My wrists have a deep gash and are raw. Dried blood and dirt cover
the wounds.

I shake my head quickly expecting his face to
soften but it doesn’t. He just stands there staring at me as if he’s more
confused than I feel.

My eyes snap to the door as it creaks open. Parker
walks in trying to be quiet. He smiles when he sees me sitting up. Then it
drops off of his face when he looks at Slade.

“Can I talk to you?” Slade says nodding to the
door.

 Parker nods.

Slade takes a step toward me, and I flinch. He
stops. “I’ll just be right outside the door. Okay?”

 I nod before him and Parker walk out. I sigh in
relief when I see I’m alone. I lay my head back against my pillow and hold my
hand to my chest. I continue to run my fingers over my ring to make sure it’s
there.

I close my heavy eyes and try taking a deep breath.

I wake with a pounding headache. I don’t know
where I am. Dark room with a musty smell.

I groan as my head throbs. I close my eyes
tightly.

I wake up again and hear voices.

 “It has to work.” It sounds like Jax but really
far away. “Do you want to give it to her? Or shall I?”

 Then another male’s voice. “You can. And it
will.” He pauses. “Fill it up a little bit more.”

 I close my eyes tightly and curl up into a
ball. The pain won’t stop. It’s all over.

 “Hello, Angel.” I feel something hard kick my
side, and I groan at the pain it causes.

 I open and close my eyes and shake my head
trying to clear my blurry vision. Headache.

 I open them and look up to see a man standing
over me with a smirk on his face. Jax.

I try jumping to my feet to make a run for it
when another set of hands land on my shoulders and pull me down. Jax’s laugh
fills my ears as a hand fists in my hair holding my face down into a mattress.
Can’t breathe.

“Hold her down,” Jax demands.

“I’m trying.” Then I feel him shove a knee into
my upper back as he lets go of my hair and grabs my wrists before pulling them
behind my back.

I lift my head from the mattress and scream.

“Nooooo!” I scream sitting up in a dark room. My
heart pounds in my chest and sweat covers my body.

 Someone jumps up beside me, and I hear a loud
noise as something hits the floor. Then the room brightens from the lights
being switched on, and I close my eyes.

I place my hand over my chest, and my heart beats
so wildly it’s painful.

“Breathe. It’s okay, baby.” A hand touches my back
gently.

I try to shove it off and move to the end of the
bed when the hand grabs me and I’m pushed to my back.

“Stop!” I scream kicking my legs but something
heavy is preventing them from making contact with the person.

“Look at me,” a male’s voice demands. “Look at me,”
it shouts.

I take in deep breaths trying to calm down. The
pain in my chest and the bright lights has my eyes held tightly shut.

 The hands shake my shoulders roughly. “Open your
eyes,” it demands once again.

I take in a deep breath and slowly open them to see
Slade standing over my bed, both of his hands on my shoulders holding me down.

 “Slade?” I sob out trying to see him through the
tears. “Please. Stop,” I cry. His hands dig into my already sore shoulders. Why
is he hurting me?

I try to wiggle free, but he holds on tightly. His
fingers are digging into my already sore shoulders. “You’re hurting me.” My
body continues to fight him.

I watch him look up to the other side of the room,
and he nods his head once. Then his eyes are back on mine. He looks so lost,
scared even. “It’s me,” he says softly as he starts to lift his hands from my
shoulders. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

I sit up and wrap my arms around his neck and cry
into his shirt. He slowly wraps his hands around my waist and pats my back as
if he’s afraid to touch me.

“It’s gonna be okay.” His voice breaks and a knot
forms in my throat. Nothing is going to be okay. I don’t even know what’s
happening to me.

 I feel a cold sensation run up my arm, and I
tighten my arms around him. “I’m not going anywhere.” His voice remains choked.

 “Please,” I cry, not knowing what I’m asking for exactly.
“Make it stop.”

“Shhh.” He starts to rock me back and forth as my
eyes get heavy. I feel my hands loosen around his neck. I try to keep my eyes
open but they are just too heavy.

I lay her down onto her back
when I feel her body go slack in mine as the nurse exits the room. Once her
head is on the pillow, I stand up and run my hands through my hair.

 “You did the right thing,” Parker says softly from
the far corner sitting back down in a chair.

“Don’t fucking tell me what I did was right,” I shout.

“Slade,” he cautions, standing once again.

“Don’t,” I growl staring at him. I point to her—now
sedated. “How is that right?” My voice shakes from anger, from fear. “What if
it hurts the baby? What if I hurt the baby?” My voice cracks. She will never forgive
me, I will never forgive myself. I just wanted to stop her from hurting herself
or from bolting from this room.

 “It had to be done. This is about her safety,” he
explains, trying to make sense.

 I shake my head. “I should be the one keeping her
safe,” I shout again. She thinks I was hurting her. I place my head in my
hands.

 “They said she will be better tomorrow,” he
reminds me.

 My head snaps up to glare at him. “And you fucking
believe that?” I ask in disbelief. “You don’t think she won’t have nightmares
of whatever the fuck he did to her?” I point my finger over at her.
Did he
not just see what I did?

He shakes his head. “I didn’t say that. I just said
that the drugs will be out of her system. She will be easier to talk to.”

I turn to look as Tate walks into her room now
dressed in a clean shirt. He takes one look at Angel sleeping in the bed and
then his eyes land on me.

“Please tell me you didn’t.”

“He did,” Parker answers before I can. “He had to.
She woke up screaming and fighting him. She was going to hurt herself. He did
the right thing.”

 “Stop saying that.” I fist my hands down by my
side.

 Tate takes a few steps closer to Parker. “So this
was your idea?” he demands.

 Parker looks him in the eyes. “Do you want her to
wake up every fifteen minutes screaming her head off? Fighting whoever she
sees, thinking it’s Jax trying to hurt her? Trying to run out of the room?
Because I guarantee, that’s where she was headed. Then she will end up in a
seventy-two hour lockdown for a psych evaluation. She could cause serious
self-harm.” His voices rises. “For how much you two say you care about her, you
don’t seem to wanna do what’s best for her.” With that he storms out of the
room.

We stand there as the silence fills the room. “She
woke up screaming?” Tate finally asks.

I nod my head bending down to pick up my chair that
turned over when I stood. “Scared the fuck out of me.” I plop down in it.

He makes his way over to the couch once again and
very carefully sits down. “I didn’t want to do it,” I say trying to not make
him hate me. “She didn’t know where she was, or who I was.” I shake my head.

I remember her asking me if I left those markings on
her wrists. I know our sex can get intense, but I would never hurt her that
badly, to the point her wrists were raw and bleeding. It broke my heart that
she even thought it could have been me.

 Tate sighs getting my attention. “Then I guess you
did the right thing.”

 I want to feel better that he agrees with my
actions but I can’t.

 My head snaps over to the door when it opens once
more, thinking it’s Parker returning to piss me off some more, when I see the
nurse walk in with a smile on her face. “I need to redress your wound,” she
says to Tate, making him roll his eyes as he stands and removes the clean shirt
that Parker had brought him.