"What time is that?" I asked.
"Just before sundown."
"I know, but like at five or six or seven o'clock?"
Fernie shook his head at me and laughed under his breath. "When you see the sun is getting close to being all the way down, come over. Don't sweat the time. I'll see you guys later."
J stepped forward and put his hand out. "Thanks, man."
Fernie shook it and nodded, surprise in his eyes at J's gesture
. Once he'd left the room, J turned to me and said he had to go talk to Dig. Of course he did. It wasn't that I disliked Dig, but sometimes I hated that it felt like we answered to him. I know it was more about J's MC brotherhood bond, or what the fuck ever, but there were times, like now, that I just wanted to bounce without having to tell anyone. I'd lived the past six years doing what I wanted, when I wanted. Now suddenly there were two people I was answering to. Not that I answered to J. We were a team, a unit—we were us. But Dig... Yeah, it felt like he had to be answered to.
I shoved my selfish thoughts away for the moment and told J I'd pack ou
r stuff while he handled Dig. I didn't think I needed to tell him anything else, so I bowed out of speaking with Dig. I gave a mental
DEUCES
to him.
Chapter 10
– J
"So ya got everything worked out with the kid and your
woman?"
Son was passed out in bed and snoring while Dig packed their few belongings. Fuckin' Son. One day he'd have to man up and be an adult. For now, he was lucky to have Dig, even if he felt the opposite.
"Yeah, brother, it's all set. What's the plan once you get back to Missouri? The Zetas taking you?"
Dig sat at the little table in the corner and offered me a beer. Sitting down at the table, we were even closer to Son's bear
-like snores. Dig kicked his boot hanging off the bed, and Son rolled over to face away from us. Son may have been pissed, but I was glad his face was smashed into a pillow facing the other way, muffling what almost sounded like someone sawing trees. It was better than him being on the streets looking for someone to fuck, though I had a feeling it was the other way around. I doubted Son looked for women, they found him more than likely.
"Brother, you got one noisy ass sleeper for a kid," I joked with Dig.
"No shit Sherlock." He tossed me a can of beer and cracked his own. "We're gonna hide out with Bill at first. I'll be in contact with Fret and see what the deal is, then we can go forward from there. Buying that bar in the middle of nowhere was about the best thing ya ever did."
"The best thing I ever did was get a
Golden Goddess off on the dance floor, but I'll give you the bar as the second best thing." I winked at him and took a swig of the beer.
"You sure did pick one hell of an old lady. That one has some serious fire. Watch so
ya don't get burned."
I almost choked on my beer.
"I'm pretty sure it's you who is feeling the burn. All I feel is warm and toasty around Elle, but I know she's like a fire to you, always testing and challenging your control. I think it's good for you." I shrugged and brought the can to my lips, trying my best not to smile—at least not too big. Elle challenged Dig at every turn, and I don't even think she was trying. It was just her. She was able to take charge of a situation like no woman I'd ever seen. It was her light, her bright fucking light. Whereas it glowed next to me, permeating my pores and filling me with positive energy, it was just a little too hot sometimes for Dig and became more of a fire than the pure rays that I saw.
"Yeah, sure." Dig got serious on me. "You know, if that hit on you
r woman was done by Burns, ya can be sure he isn't done. In fact, I'd imagine ya just riled him up since he didn't get what he wanted."
"To force my
hand by taking the woman I love? No, the fucker failed, and his men didn't go back to Missouri, so I'm sure he's hella pissed."
"That means he'll try again, and you and your woman need to keep yo
ur heads down and stay outta sight. Burns isn't a Zeta, that's for sure. Those guys don't fuck around, but I wouldn't underestimate Burns. You were his key to taking over Missouri, and now, not only has he lost his key, but he's losing it all. The drugs, the guns, and the state are all slipping out of his fingers. Ya hear me, brother?"
"Outta sight. Gotchya." I stood up and squeezed Dig's shoulder. "Thanks for the beer, and for going back into battle over there. Let me know how shit goes down."
"Will do. You'll be hearing from Son. Stay safe."
"Yep. You too."
Chapter 11
– Elle
I was bored, so fucking bored. The first day with Abuelita was OK. She walked around the house with me pointing at everything, and I mean everything, then saying its name in Spanish. I learned all the furniture pieces, the food in the fridge, the crap on her dresser, every piece of bedding you could think of, and my personal favorite,
el anillo
—the ring, which she said while pointing to my finger and smiling like the ring was made of platinum and gold.
When Fernie got home that night, I asked him what was up with Abuelita's reaction to my ring.
"She thinks you married J. You know, you were here with José and didn't have a ring. Now you're here with J—and you have the ring."
"Does she think I'm a slut?" Fuck! I didn't need anyone's grandma thinking I was a raging whore bringing different men back to the house.
"No," Fernie laughed. "She thinks you're, like, uh, I don't know. I guess she thinks you're an honest woman or something since you're married."
Now it was my turn to break out into laughter. I wasn't sure about metaphorically being an
honest woman
, but I sure as hell wasn't honest in the literal sense if she thought I was married to J. I tried reigning myself in, but damn, that shit was funny. At least to me it was. Fernie on the other hand was looking at me with a blank stare, so I filled him in.
"You think I married J?" Fernie nodded. "At what point during the last few days do you think I had time to get married?" Fernie shrugged. "Dude, it's just a ring."
"But you have it on the wedding finger." OK, so Fernie was thoroughly perplexed, and as much as I wanted to fuck with him by not answering the question that I knew was in his brain, but he wasn't saying out loud, I clued him in.
"
I love J, and this ring symbolizes that and our desire to spend the rest of our lives together. It is a symbol of trust and commitment, not one that says the law or the Pope have "approved" our love." I made air quotes with my hands and hoped Fernie understood.
"So, you're not going to have a wedding?"
I shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. I guess if we did, we'd do it our way. Can you really see me in a white dress?"
Trying to be nice, F
ernie drew his words out. "Wellllll, maaaaybe."
"Dude, it's OK. No white dresses for Elle. Maybe red." I winked.
"Yeah, you sure as hell wouldn't be a Mexican wife."
"Whoa. What does that mean?"
"Can you cook a
sopa
?" he asked.
"I don't know what a
sopa
is, but I think I can cook just about anything if someone teaches me. How do you think I learned at the restaurant?"
"OK, so you can cook. Can you wash you
r clothes by hand?"
"What? Dude, your grandma has a washer."
"Yeah, but if you had to, could you wash your clothes by hand? Cuz before my mom sent money to Abuelita for that washer last year, she washed all of her and Tío's clothes by hand."
He didn't know where I came from. I'd washed plenty of clothes by hand. Shit, I'd worn dirty clothes when there wasn't even a place to wash them. Not that I was about to go into my days on the street with Fernie, but he was failing at making his point. Seeing the look of defiance in my eyes, he chose another example.
"Would you stay home and take care of your family while your husband went to the farm and worked? Or would you stay in Mexico, alone with your kids, while your husband went to the States to try and make money for your family? Would you do that?"
"Whoa, no kids for Elle." The thought of kids had me talking in third person.
"That's how it is here. AND that's why you wouldn't be a Mexican wife."
I thought about his words. He was right. I could take care of a house, my husband, and my kids, if I wanted kids—but I didn't. I couldn't imagine having a bunch of little people running around my feet. A dog or two, maybe, but little peo
ple who I was responsible for? No. I loved my teens with all my heart and then some, but babies seemed scarier than being eight years old and my dad showing me Stephen King's IT and thinking my fear was hysterical. I had nightmares for a month. A round of shivers went down my body thinking of IT and babies, especially in the same thought.
"You're right, Fernie. I'd never make it as a Mexican Mom. I give all the props in the world to your
s, and to Abuelita. They are better women than me."
"Your heart's just in a different place."
Those were kind words for Fernie to say, but he couldn't have been more right about me and Mexican Moms, though I appreciated his attempts to lessen the blow.
Chapter 12
– J
Elle was going out of her mind. She'd been reading nonstop on her device, but I could tell she was running out of patience
for hiding out. God bless Abuelita for opening her house to us, but hiding out with Dig had been much more entertaining, especially once Isabel arrived. If it were just me and Elle, we'd be fucking like rabbits while we hid. Instead, Elle was getting daily Spanish lessons interspersed with her romance readings.
Abuelita had taken Elle under her wing. I knew Elle appreciated the diversion, but I could also see her growing restless
ness. She wasn't used to being cooped up in one place for so long. Not like I was an expert at it, but I'd done enough hiding to be used to the eventual monotony that set in. I couldn't have made it through all those hours in Texas and Monterrey without my photos of Elle and excessive jerking off. It could have been great having Elle with me this time, but the walls of the fucking house were like paper. If we could hear Abuelita's snores, Elle was sure she would hear our fucking. Ergo, very little fucking had taken place.
We were laying in bed, having been at Abuelita's for almost a week, and Elle was tossing and turning. I didn't know if she couldn't sleep, or just couldn't turn her mind o
ff. Sex usually did the trick.
"You OK, sweetheart?"
Elle flopped onto her back.
"I don't want to be a bitch," she whispered, "cuz I really am grateful for Abuelita letting us stay here, but I'm so fucking bored. I wanna poke my damn eyes out with a
cuchillo
."
"A what?"
"A knife. Day one of Abuelita's Spanish lessons took place in the kitchen, and many more after that. I feel even bitchier cuz I think she likes having company, even if our conversations are broken." She threw her arm over her eyes and groaned. "But I'm so fucking bored, yo. It's killing me. I'm trying to chill out, but I feel like a caged bird. And my ass ain't about to sing."
I laughed at her ability to be so frustrated, yet still crack jokes. That was my Elle.
"I know you're going crazy, but I haven't heard from Dig or Son yet. I was gonna give them another day or so before I tried contacting them. Think of this as a vacation."
She leaned over and pulled the chain on a lamp that was as old as Grandma. The light shone
on her piercing stare, and it was pointed straight in my direction. What did I say?
"If we were on vacation, we'd be laying on a private beach fucking our brains out, not learning Spanish with Grandma
. Fuck, I'd even be down to go to
Lotería
with her if I could get out of this fucking house for five minutes." She threw her hand over her mouth, realizing she said that kind of loud. We both held our breaths and listened for a moment.
"Shit," Elle whispered when we heard the snores of an old lady across the hall.
"What is the
Lotería
?" How was she learning so much Spanish and I was still clueless as to what was going on most of the time?
"Dude, it's fucking Bingo. Straight up old lady Bingo."
"Is it at the church?" A smile spread across her face. Bingo. That was the goal. Her smile shone brighter than the ancient lamp sitting next to us.
"I don't know where it is, but you know them old ladies be gettin' crazy up in Bingo. Shit starts to pop off, and next thing you know canes and walkers are being thrown around. Ain't no joke up in Bingo, but you better come with your best purple hair."
I grabbed her and pulled her to me, burying my head in her stomach to stop the laugh that wanted to rip from my lips. I ran my cheek against her soft flesh, and I felt my dick harden against her leg.
"Dude, we're at Grandma's, and on the run from crazy people, in Mexico, with Fernie in the house, and who the hell knows what going on in Missouri."
I let my lips travel down her smooth skin and move to between her legs.
"I don't give a fuck," I whispered against her mound.
"J," she attempted to chastise. The moment my mouth came into contact with the inside of her thigh, a moan escaped her mouth. When my tongue went to circle her favorite spot, she pulled a pillow over her face and moaned, "Fuck it."
I couldn't help but smile, and suck. I sucked her nub into my mouth pulling a long moan from underneath the pillow. Inserting one finger, and then two, I gently took her clit between my teeth, scraping them across it while rubbing her other favorite spot with my digits.
Her hips started to thrash, obviously trying to hold in the sounds that wanted to explode from her mouth. Instead, I held her hips down with one hand, and made her pussy explode. Her muffled moans let me know I was successful. BINGO!
I slowly slipped my fingers out of her, allowing the frenzied state I'd created to dissipate before I expected words from her.
She let the pillow slip from over her flushed face, and for a moment I heard the Rocky soundtrack in the back of my head.
"Thanks, baby," she
rasped on an exhale.
"Think you can sleep now?"
"Yes, but can I do something for you in return?" Awww, so nice of her.
"Maybe tomorrow.
I was ready to sleep aside from your tossing and turning. Sleep now, sweetheart. You're gonna need it in the morning."
I crawled back up the bed and we got into our pretzel position.
"I read about something we can do in the shower," she said into my chest, drifting off to sleep.
"What's that?"
My question was met with snores, but I was most certain I heard the word shower. Nice. Maybe something out of her book? BINGO!
******
The next morning we recreated a scene from a book by "The Brilliant Fucking Ritchie Sisters." Her words, not mine. Though if they wrote what we did, then they were indeed brilliant.
I left her in the bathroom afterwards to finish getting ready. I found Grandma in the kitchen making breakfast, something I could get used to, though I'd never say it in front of Elle. She held up her pan of fried eggs as an offering. I gave the thumbs up, but needed to find someone first.
"Fernie?"
She rambled off something in Spanish that I couldn't understand. I followed her outstretched hand and finger to the backdoor hoping it meant the kid was outside. I found him at the patio table drinkin
g Coca-Cola from a glass bottle. Talk about throwbacks.
"Hey, man. Think you could help me out with something?" I took a seat next to him.
"Like what?" The kid sat up straight, probably thinking I was going to send him on a death mission.
"Elle is going a 'lil crazy. Is there someplace we could go to hang out? It's gotta be off the beaten path where no one will see us, but also someplace that we can kick back."
"We could go to the
Baile
this weekend."
"The what?"
"It's like a club, sort of."
"No clubs." That was about the worst possible place we could go. "Someplace no one will notice us. We're on the run, kid. We can't be seen."
"There's this park we go to,
Ojo de Agua
."
"Ojo de what?" Swear I could use Isabel right now, and not for her
skills in the bedroom, but for her damn translation services.
"
Never mind. It's a park where people kick it. We can go when it gets dark. It's chill. No one will notice. Well, they might notice you, the giant, and Elle, the white girl. If we get a spot in the back, it'll be all good. We can get some beers there and smoke if you want."
"Smoke weed?" When did this kid suddenly become a weed smoker, and did Elle know?
"Yeah. You guys smoke, right?" The kid acted like it was no big thing. Under different circumstances, I wouldn't give a fuck, but I knew Elle would.
"Kid, you bring up weed around Elle and she just might kick your ass. We'd be down for a beer or two, but I can already hear the lecture you'll get if you try to get high around Elle."
"She's gotten high, right?"
"I'm done talking about this. Anymore and you gotta go talk to her. What time can we go tonight?" Shit, I wasn't about to tell the kid anything about Elle and weed. It was a long story, and one that wasn't mine to tell. I know she hadn't smoked for a while since she commented
about it to me one night in bed. She said she liked the feeling of having a clear head, and that maybe when life was "normal" again she'd rethink her relationship with weed. I'd already told her she didn't have to slang bags to pay for school. That brought up a-whole-nother conversation about the money I slipped into her bank account. I told her that was a conversation for in the States, not Mexico.
I think she'd be OK having a beer tonight, just a little something to take the edge off. Even if the kid was around. Shit, he'd been drinking around the house in front of Grandma and she didn't seem to care. Plus, every American knew about the lack of drinking age in Mexico, so there wasn't much Elle could say even if she wanted to.
"I'll call my friend with a car and see if he can pick us up." He pulled a cell phone out of his pocket and started a conversation in Spanish. I tuned it out, something I'd become quite adept at.
"What's going on out here?" Elle sauntered out the back door in shorts and a tank top. She plopped herself on my lap, her long legs draped over mine. I ran my hand over her calf, enjoying the feeling of her smooth skin in my hand. I looked up to darkened eyes filled with lust despite what we'd just done in the shower. Or maybe it was left over lust from the shower. Whatever. I kept running my hands over her legs. Her alabaster skin was so soft, I couldn't seem to pull myself away. I wanted to run my hands up those too short shorts of hers, feel her wetness on my fingers—
"Dude, you keep doing that and our whole conversation is about to come out. Gross." Fernie was staring at us like a kid would stare at his parents making out. It made me feel old, yet still horny as fuck. He slipped his phone back in his pocket, mumbling something in Spanish, probably about old people and sex. If he wanted to hear gross, I'd bring up Abuelita. Fuck, now I was grossed out.
I pulled my hands
from Elle's leg and winked at her. She was too lost in her dirty thoughts to catch Fernie's comment about our prior topic of conversation. She was probably recreating scenes from her books in that smutty head of hers.
"What did your friend say?"
"He's picking us up at eight. That cool?"
"We're going somewhere?" Elle perked up.
"Yep. The kid is taking us to a park tonight. It's on the DL. We can get a beer and relax. It'll be fun." Her smile radiated warmth to every inch of my body. Fuck, now I was the one with some smutty fucking thoughts, and there were no grandmas in them.
"It's safe?" she asked, always the vigilant one. Damn, I loved this woman.
"It should be all good. If we get there and it doesn't feel right, we'll come back. That cool, kid?"
"Yep. I gotta get back to it." Fernie stood up to leave. "But don't do anything nasty on my Abuelita's patio table, OK?"
"Yes, sir." Elle saluted. Fernie shook his head and walked away.
The smile on my face was short-lived as dark thoughts started to creep into my head. When had things ever gone right for Elle and me?
I wanted to be happy for a moment, but it felt like the minute I got too cozy shit would pop off. I felt myself tense up at the thought of dragging Elle though more of my drama.
"I love you,
J, but you're squeezing the life out of me." I looked up at the woman I loved sitting on my lap. Shit. "You OK?"
"Fuck." I grabbed my shoulder without thinking, saying a prayer to Gramps. "It's just that for a moment everything felt perfect. The sun is shining, you're sm
iling, and we're together. I'm waiting for something to fuck it up. Every time shit's perfect, something fucked up happens."
She put her hands on either side of my face. "Baby, I know," she whispered. Leaning forward, she presse
d her lips gently against mine. I pressed my forehead to hers and took deep breaths.
"I get your fear. It's not without reason. We'll be cautious, and I know you'll protect me—"
"With my life," I interjected.
"Try not to die, OK? What I mean is, we'll be fine. It's OK to be afraid. It's good cuz it keeps us both on our toes, but I feel like Abuelita's has been our one safe-haven in this storm. So let's just enjoy it. Like you said, the sun is shining and we're together."
Bringing my hands and laying them over hers which were still holding either side of my face, I kissed her, long and deep. A kiss to show her just how much she meant to me—everything. Everything we were doing was for her, for us. I wanted "normal" just as much as she did, and I intended to see this plan through to get our normal, to get our
us
.
I shoved my hands into her damp hair, cradling her head and leaning it back. I licked and kissed down her throat, savoring the taste of her damp skin. Fuck if I didn't want to sink my dick right back into her.
"I said NOTHING NASTY!!"