Dark Solace (3 page)

Lash’s tone was cutting now, sharp as a
knife, heavy with emotion. “I was there when Titus told Devlin. And
do you know what he did? Devlin just looked at me, and then he
looked back at Titus, and told Titus to take as much blood as he
needed, that he would give it to me himself from now on. However
much Titus needed, to get the potion to work, to keep me
alive.”

I was speechless. I couldn’t imagine Devlin
caring that much about someone, to risk his own death, really risk
it. He hadn’t given Danial any of his blood in the centuries they’d
lived, not one drop. He hadn’t wanted to share his power, or make
himself weak. But he’d put himself on the chopping block for
Lash.

Lash saw my surprise and nodded. “The worst
part was when Devlin was deposed as Ruler. Danial took almost all
of his blood that night. Devlin was okay after, but he had none of
his power. Neither did his blood. It almost killed him that first
time, letting Titus take what he needed for me. The loss made him
weaker than I’d ever seen him. He could barely move for days
afterwards. But he said he would make it, that he wasn’t done with
life yet, and neither was I.”

Of course. Lash has said he got the scar in
Rio...it hadn’t been any poison that had slowed his regeneration,
but that Devlin’s blood had lost much of his power...and Lash had
suffered as a result, when the potion that was made from that
weaker blood ceased to work. “But your scar still hasn’t healed,
even after Devlin regained his power at the Gathering—”

Lash talked over me. “Devlin recovered some
of his power in time. But his blood was no longer strong enough to
keep me healthy like I was. When I got this wound, and it didn’t
heal as it should, I knew that something was wrong.”

Wait a minute. “Then Devlin was already
planning to kill Ebediah,” I said wearily. “For you. It had nothing
to do with me at all. He did it in hopes his blood would become
powerful enough to save you—”

“No,” Lash said, hissing furiously. “Dev has
no idea, not about any of this! Deposing Ebediah, and all of that
was for you, Sarelle; to protect you! I went to Titus, and asked
him what had happened, when the wound didn’t heal. He told me that
Devlin’s blood wasn’t powerful enough anymore. By the time Devlin
got strong again, it didn’t matter anyway. Years had passed since
I’d had the stronger blood, and it was too late. My powers of
regeneration will never come back. My life has been drawn out as
long as it can be.”

I sat there in the dust, and thought how
awful everything was. I’d never dreamed that deposing Devlin all
those years ago would have such long reaching affects. I’d doomed
Lash by saving myself. Back then, I hadn’t known Lash even existed.
Even then, I might not have cared. But I did care about him now. He
was dying now because of me. “I’m sorry.”

“I never told him,” Lash added sadly. “He
would blame himself, and he’s done enough for me. It isn’t his
fault that he can’t make me live forever like him.”

I looked up at Lash, then reached my hand up.
He reached down, and hauled me to my feet. “Will you do it?” he
hissed. “Or do you want to back out, Sar?”

I couldn’t reconsider my path. But I could
try one more time to get him to change his mind. “I can’t open
myself up to getting hurt, Lash,” I said, tears in my eyes. “It was
too painful the first time.”

“I’m not asking you to turn a blind eye, or
forgive him again and again,” Lash hissed gently. “Give him another
chance. One chance. If he fucks it up, it’s on him. In fact, if he
fucks up like he did before, I’m telling you now to leave him and
never come back.”

I was quiet, considering. “Just one
chance?”

“One chance,” Lash agreed. “Give Dev that,
and I’ll give you Theo’s life. It’s fair.”

There wasn’t another choice. And the hardest
part would be explaining to Theo why I was going back to Dev. “I’ll
do it. Please make sure Theo doesn’t see you there. I don’t want to
tell him until it’s over—”

“You are not going to tell him at all,” Lash
hissed firmly. “I want Dev to think you came back to him of your
own volition. I don’t care what you tell Theo. Tell him you saw
your child, and decided that you still loved Dev. Make something
up, if you want to. But you are not to tell him the truth. And you
are never, never, to breathe a word of this to Devlin.”

Great, more secrets.

“That is non-negotiable,” Lash hissed. “Agree
to it, Sar, or walk away.”

“I’ll do it after you save Theo,” I said
softly. “I give you my word.”

Lash nodded. “I know you, Sar. Your word is
good enough for me.”

We began to walk back towards Hayden.

“So what do I do?” I asked.

“Go home and collect yourself. Come back
Saturday night, two nights from now. By then Theo will be safe, and
you can concentrate on Devlin. He’ll be back after ten—”

“I can’t just show up unannounced,” I said
hopelessly. “I don’t want to find any more party favors—”

“Sar, he’s been with no one. You’ll find him
alone.”

“Lash, I know Dev. He can’t be alone for more
than—”

“He’s taken chemical help,” Lash said,
another crooked smile gracing his lips. “But be prepared for a
marathon. It’ll take a while to work out five months’ worth of
kinks.”

“Why would he do that?” I asked in
disbelief.

“Because I told him he was a loser and
deserved to lose you, and that if he didn’t do this, he would—”

“Why do you want me with him?” I said
bluntly.

“Because he waited a long time to fall in
love,” Lash hissed, looking away from me. “He needs to pay
attention and not fuck this up.” He shot me a grin. “Besides, he
needed to hear it. Dev was getting enough head from Hillary and
Tiffany to get by. It was only for a couple months. I’ve gone
longer than that, when I had to. And I’m were—”

“That’s sufficient,” I said quickly. “Thank
you for telling me.”

“I’ll be there tomorrow,” Lash said
reassuringly. “You won’t see me, but I’ll call you after it’s over
to tell you Theo is safe.”

“Okay,” I said. “Be careful yourself,
okay?”

“Go home,” Lash said, smiling faintly. “I’m
sure you have things to do. Theo is probably missing your
company.”

I stopped and turned to him. “Do you need
some of my blood?”

Lash looked over at me. “I never turn down
blood,” he said casually. “But why are you offering?”

“I want you to fight your best,” I answered.
“Won’t it help?”

Lash opened his arms, and held my eyes with
his. “It won’t hurt.”

I went to him, and he put his arms around me,
drawing me close. I smelled the scent of him—autumn leaves, musk,
and earth. I felt his lips on my neck, and a moment later, his
fangs sliding in. He just put them in deep enough to nick a vein,
and began swallowing gently, holding me loosely. Lash took only a
few swallows, and then drew his fangs out of me, pulling away.

I stopped him. “Was that enough?” I asked
worriedly.

Lash kissed my wound gently. “You can’t give
me enough, Sar,” he murmured. He stepped back, then handed me a
tissue from his pocket.

I held it to my neck. At least I didn’t have
to worry about a wound. The bleeding would stop in a few moments.
I’d probably be healed by the time I arrived home, thanks to the
vampire virus levels in my blood.

Lash regarded me intently, and then he
suddenly put his hand to my face, cupping my cheek gently. I looked
at him in confusion. Lash dropped his hand from my face, turned
from me, and walked away without looking back.

I waited until he had gotten inside Hayden,
and then began treading slowly up to the house. Relieved the
hardest part was over, I focused on the ton of other problems left
to solve, the first being to borrow a shirt from Serena, and make
sure I didn’t smell like Lash.

When I went into the kitchen, Serena was
there, waiting for me at the table. “Sar, what’s going on?” she
asked, eying me speculatively.

“Grab me a shirt, and let’s go for a walk,” I
said tiredly, sitting down heavily in a chair.

“You can go upstairs and get one of your
own,” she replied kindly. “Dev and Titus are up in Canada,
finishing up the last of Ebediah’s affairs. Venus is sleeping,
Robin is down in town, and the bears don’t come over here now that
Devlin’s asked them to keep away from the baby. No one will hear
you except Lash, who is upstairs. He must already know what this is
about, since by your scent you found him.”

I sagged with relief in the chair. I’d be
dealing with Dev soon enough. “Thanks.”

After I changed upstairs, I came back down to
her. “Do I smell okay?”

She sniffed me, knowing what I was asking,
then opened her robe and hugged me hard, briefly rubbing her naked
body against my clothed one. “You smell like me now, Sar,” she said
with a smile, fastening her robe. “No snake smell. And you only
smelled faintly of Lash anyway.”

I went to the sink and washed my face and
neck. “I’m not bleeding, am I?”

“Come on, Sarelle, tell me,” Serena said,
annoyed.

I couldn’t tell her the truth. Lash was
listening for sure. And while Lash might not harm Elle, he’d surely
kill Serena to make sure Devlin never discovered our deal. “I’m
thinking of seeing Dev again. Of coming here again, to stay like I
used to. But I couldn’t let Devlin find out until I was sure,
Serena. And I was afraid of finding him with someone—”

“I understand,” she said, nodding. “You
should know that since you left, I have never seen him with a woman
here. I can’t say for when he’s away, but—”

I had believed Lash. But it was good to hear
it from her, too.

“—
Devlin’s not going to be traveling
anymore,” she finished. “He said he has to be here to take care of
Venus. This should be the last week he’s gone.”

“Then all things being even, you should see
me the night after tomorrow, probably,” I said, giving her a smile.
“Maybe we can do some gardening the next morning.”

“I’d like that. I was afraid to come and see
you after what happened with Cia.”

“I’m sorry about that, too.” Cia was still
not talking to me after our words over Serena’s coyote ancestry,
but that was her problem.

“Never mind,” Serena said, hugging me. “I’m
just happy you are coming to stay again.”

When I walked out, I expected to see Lash
there giving me a knowing look. Instead the stairs were empty. But
the tracking device was there waiting on my seat when I got into my
truck. Before I went into the house, I planted it in Theo’s
vehicle, as Lash had instructed.

* * * *

That night over a takeout pizza by
candlelight, Theo and I toasted one another. “To you and me and
Devon,” I said softly. “To us.”

I tried not to overdo it, not wanting Theo to
think that I thought he was going to die. That was a lot easier now
I knew Lash would be there, watching his back.

“Sar?” Theo said reluctantly. “I need to talk
about some things with you after dinner.”

It had to be The Talk I Had Been Dreading.
“Let’s go in the living room.”

After the remains of dinner had been cleaned
up, we both went in on the couch, and sat down. Devon was lying on
Theo’s lap, purring softly. I was a bundle of nerves, my hand
clenching my wine glass so hard I was surprised the stem didn’t
break.

“Sar, I might not come back,” Theo began,
reaching out and grabbing my free hand. “If I don’t, I want you to
go back to Danial.”

I was so shocked, I swallowed some saliva,
and began to cough. I got up quickly and got a drink of water,
deliberately taking a while, my mind racing furiously.

Five minutes later, I sat back down. “What
are you suggesting?” I asked.

“Sar, I’ve resigned myself to sharing you
with him. I know he loves you. He’ll take care of you, and Devon.
For a long time, I was bitter and jealous that you went to him when
I was gone. But that was selfish of me. If I was truly dead, you’d
both be vulnerable. I don’t want you to be alone here, trying to
tough it out by yourself out of some misguided sense of loyalty to
me. You were happy with him, before.” He looked away. “You could be
again.”

“You are coming back,” I said firmly. “So
it’s easy for me to tell you that yes, I’ll do that.”

“If I’m coming back, I’ll reach home by
dawn,” Theo said gruffly. “If I’m not here by then, pack a bag and
go. If I’m badly injured, I’ll look for you at Danial’s—”

I nodded. “Okay.”

“—
and you should also Oath again to
Devlin,” Theo finished, forcing the words out. “As soon as
possible.”

A huge tension left me; now I had a clear way
to approach Dev, Theo having given me permission. But this also
seemed not only too easy, but also completely out of character for
Theo. “Why now?”

“You told me once you loved Devlin, that you
would never do anything to hurt him. And the truth is, Danial’s not
enough to keep you safe. Neither am I.” He paused. “I can’t say if
Dev loves you. He was a jerk, to do what he did. But you are the
mother of his only child. He’ll protect you just for that. Once you
tell him you want his protection, he’ll give it to you.”

“This is all rational, but you’re reciting
this like a movie scene,” I replied. “Why? I know you don’t want me
to be with him again.”

“Because Danial took me aside last week, and
advised it,” Theo growled. “Samuel has contacted him. Harriet had
the baby, Sar. It was a month early and stillborn.”

I closed my eyes, and sagged. Harriet had
been the only other woman with blood that was kind of like mine:
capable of the resistance to the virus necessary to carry a
vampire’s child to term. Coupled with a secret infusion of a potion
with some of my blood made by Titus, Devlin had hoped to make her
blood exactly like mine. But his plot hadn’t worked...and now would
soon be discovered. “Then they’ll be coming for me to find out
why.”