AFTER GROUP
Abby had a seizure! Abby had a seizure! It was so weird. One minute, Phil/Shaggy was talking out of his ass about the gang he used to sell drugs for (yeah, right), and the next minute Abby was flopping around on the floor like a fish. I don’t mean to sound insensitive (which is basically saying that I do), but that’s really the best way to describe it. Her eyes rolled, her mouth hung open, and her arms and legs jerked up and down. It felt like there
were a solid thirty seconds where everyone just stared at her, waiting for Satan to speak out of her mouth. That’s what I was waiting for, at least. But when she didn’t speak and she just kept flopping, Eugene, Bobby, and Matt O. got onto their knees and tried to help her. Eugene pulled out a walkie-talkie and called for medical help. I didn’t want to stare at Abby because that seemed rude, and I didn’t want to look at anyone else because that seemed creepy, so I just stared into a corner until help arrived.
I couldn’t believe how Matt O. took control of the situation. He hasn’t touched anyone in six months, and there he was holding on to Abby during her seizure. And there I was, afraid to look at her, afraid to touch her, afraid to look at anyone.
When I got back to my room after Group, Sandy was finally there. She stood at the window, fingers pressed against the screen.
“You OK?” I asked. She pulled her hands off of the screen, and itty-bitty squares dotted her fingertips like new fingerprints.
“I’m fine,” she said. I could tell she was lying. “What happened in Group? We heard a lot of yelling.”
I told her about Abby and how I was freaked. “Did she talk like the girl in
The Exorcist
?”
“No. It was scary enough without that. I would have heaved all over if she went devil-child on us. I wonder if any of that was even real. The seizure looked real, not that I’ve ever seen a seizure before, so I don’t think she was faking. Why would she fake it?”
“So people don’t think she’s a liar.”
“I think if she was really lying she would have faked a little
devil talk, like, ‘Let Abby go. Satan warns you.’ You know, so she could get out of here.”
Sandy looked at me while she chewed her lip.
“I don’t think it quite works that way,” she said.
“What works what way?” There were too many thoughts and memories rushing through my brain to sort out what she was referring to.
“Lying, I mean. I don’t think lying’s the best way to get out of here.”
Sandy picked at a loose piece of skin on her finger. I waited. “Sometimes,” she continued, “lying is what gets you here in the first place.” She spoke slowly and apologetically.
“What are you talking about?” I hated feeling naïve.
“I’m not pregnant.” She smiled fakely, eyebrows raised.
“Did you lose the baby?” I still didn’t know what she was talking about.
“Not exactly. Not at all, really. I was never pregnant.”
Say what now?
“I faked it so Derek wouldn’t break up with me. Again.”
This is so Jerry Springer! “You pretended that you were pregnant so your boyfriend would think he had to be with you forever? What did you think would happen when no baby came out?” I was pissed, mostly because she lied to
me.
“I just figured by that time he would be so in love with me again that it wouldn’t matter. That’s what happened last time.”
“Last time? You did this before?”
“Just once. I kind of
thought
I was pregnant at the time, until I got my period. But Derek was being so nice to me and buying me treats and mini Cubs T-shirts that I couldn’t tell him the truth.”
“So what did you tell him?” My anger was surpassed by the curiosity and disbelief of it all.
“I told him I lost the baby. At cheerleading practice. Everyone made a big deal over me after that, but then they forgot and Derek and I started getting in fights again. This just felt like the right thing to do.”
I sat on my bed, dumbfounded. I was duped; I didn’t know Sandy at all.
“I talked to Birdcage this morning and told him everything because I was so sick of changing Morgan’s fake diaper, and feeding her fake face, and losing sleep over a stupid, fake baby.” She whipped Morgan against the screen, and she dropped to the floor like the plastic doll she was.
“Birdcage said they already knew I wasn’t pregnant because of all the blood and urine tests, and they just wanted to see how I’d handle the responsibility.” That is so messed up. They knew? Maybe Birdcage thought it wasn’t hurting anyone, since Derek isn’t here and he probably told her parents. Did they even consider how it would affect those of us who are paying Lake Shit customers?
“Birdcage set up a phone call for me and Derek tonight, so
I can tell him.” Sandy didn’t seem bothered at all. “I can’t wait to hear his voice. I hope he doesn’t dump me.”
I think she wanted me to say something reassuring, but what did I know about sex and boyfriends and fake pregnancies? I was pissed that someone I thought was on my side was just as full of shit as all of the assalong adults here. “I need to do some homework,” I told her, and I lay back on my bed, not reading
The Crucible.