Holistic Beauty from the Inside Out (4 page)

THINK “PRETTY” THOUGHTS

Remember that we can make our own thoughts. No one thinks in the same way, and making other people think like us is a waste of precious mental energy. It’s your thoughts, not life’s challenges, that make you truly positive and happy about yourself. Only you, not the outside world, can dictate how you feel. Throw out all the “mental junk food” that overwhelms your brain. Negative thought patterns varying from “I am so fat, I will never meet someone,”
to “I am so old and ugly,” should go down the drain so that you could fill your mental space with wholesome, positive thinking patterns that make you feel and look better. Healthy thoughts will make your skin glow and eyes sparkle.

A great example of this technique that is easy to incorporate into your life is the use of positive affirmations. Pick a few positive and validating phrases, and repeat them to yourself throughout the day. “I am beautiful” is a wonderful and simple affirmation. Simply repeat the phrase to yourself, either aloud or in your head, and imagine yourself at your most beautiful. Do this while cooking dinner, driving to work, doing the laundry, brushing your teeth—whenever your mind is likely to roam. Eventually, you will notice that this positive, life-affirming phrase will start to pop up into your head all on its own, and replace some of the old negative self-talk. Filling your mind with positive affirmations has the power to change your whole attitude, and imbue you with a confidence and appreciation for life that is often accompanied by a gorgeous, energetic glow.

STOP CRITICIZING

A critical state of mind bites other people and eats you alive. Some people get an instant “high” from wagging their acrid tongues, but in fact criticizing others is a quick but dishonest way to praise yourself. In the long run, all this negativity spilled at others damages your own self-esteem. If we cannot achieve certain things that we have always wanted, then we begin complaining and
criticizing others. When you feel comfortable in your own skin, you are not threatened or offended by the imperfections you see in others. Being less critical and judgmental of other people makes you kinder and more accepting of your own flaws and imperfections that make you unique. When you encounter new acquaintances, make it a goal to look for something you like about them, and pay them a compliment. As you go through you day with your loved ones and coworkers, do the same for them. When you seek out the beauty and admirable features in those around you, you will find yourself in an ever-increasingly beautiful universe.

Being less critical can extend beyond those around you, to your general view on life. Keeping a gratefulness journal is an excellent daily practice that has transformative effects, and takes merely one or two minutes a day. Simply write down what you are most grateful for each night in a journal that you keep in your bedroom. It could be a gorgeous full moon, a particularly delicious piece of fruit, or your baby’s first word. Whatever you choose each night, the practice of searching for what you are most grateful for helps you to put on some rose-colored glasses that will help you to encounter, and therefore experience, the world less critically. After this becomes habit, you will find yourself looking for things to be grateful for throughout the day, and finding lots of beautiful possibilities you may never have noticed before.

DECIDE WHAT’S BEST FOR YOU

All of us make decisions on a daily basis. “Life is the sum of all your choices,” wrote Albert Camus. When it comes to your looks, your main goal is to be comfortable with your decisions. Heavy makeup and elaborate hair styles make you annoyingly aware of your body all day, stripping away your confidence and filling you up with negativity which can ruin all the efforts you make to prettify yourself. If a no-makeup face and no-hairspray hair make you
feel good in your skin, do so rather than try to squeeze yourself into the image you think is trendy and “fashionable” right now.

PRAISE YOURSELF

A common thought for many women is, “If I have blotchy skin, if I have dull hair, if my thighs are wobbly, if I’m not thin enough, no one will want me.” That’s a terrible mind-set that can lead to sheer obsession with appearance. If you heard these statements from someone else, you would call them hurtful. Yet, we allow us to hurt ourselves all the time. Next time when you take a critical look in the mirror, think about the amazing machine your body is. Your eyes can read and cry, no matter what size and color they are. Your legs can run and bike, even if you forget to wax them. Your tummy can grow little people inside of you—yes, even when covered with cellulite. How amazing! Instead of criticizing what your body
looks like
, show it a little love by appreciating what it
does
. How often do you focus who you are as a person instead of how you look? Do you ever say, “Good job, my sweetheart!” or even pat yourself on the shoulder? Hug yourself and even dot a little kiss at your hand for being positive and kind to yourself. Self-compassion and self-acceptance are the cornerstones of healthy attitude toward beauty. Continual judgment and criticism of our looks keeps us locked in a continuous cycle of unhappiness with our looks, our faces, and ultimately our lives.

IMAGINE YOURSELF BEAUTIFUL

You can take charge of your thoughts and guide your imagination toward a relaxed, focused state where you see yourself as an attractive, confident person with glowing skin and a slender, healthy body. Guided imagery is a program of directed thoughts and suggestions that involve all of your senses.

Here’s a simple exercise that demonstrates the immense power of imagination over our well-being. Visualize a lemon in slightest
detail: its yellow dotty skin, the shiny surface, the oval shape, the pungent smell. Continue to imagine the taste of the lemon and then imagine yourself taking a bite of the fruit. Feel the tangy juice squirting into your mouth. Do you salivate? I bet you do. Now you can see how eagerly our body responds to what you are imagining.

You can use guided imagery technique to achieve a relaxed state of mind and improve your self-acceptance, health, and sense of well-being. Imagine a safe, comfortable place, such as a beach or a garden, in a great detail. Lie comfortably on the floor or recline on a sofa.

Take a few slow, even breaths. When you are feeling relaxed, gently close your eyes. Picture yourself lying on a beautiful secluded beach or a lovely garden full of flowers. Picture soft white sand around you, or maybe soft grass caressing your body. Imagine a cloudless sky above and green leaves gently moving in the warm breeze. Feel the warm touch of mellow sun on your skin. Enjoy the sound of the waves gently rolling onto shore or birds chirping in the trees around you.

Breathe in and smell the scent of the ocean and the aroma of flowers. Picture yourself looking young, with glowing skin and glossy hair, dressed in a beautiful and comfortable outfit.

Stay in this scene for as long as you like. Notice how relaxed and calm you feel. Notice how the tension melts throughout your entire body, from your head to your toes. Notice how insignificant your worries and fears look when you have surrounded yourself with peace and quiet.

When the time is up (start with fifteen minutes twice a day), slowly count backward from ten. Open your eyes.

During guided imagery, our body seems to respond as though what you are imagining is real. When you imagine yourself free from stresses and looking naturally gorgeous, our body follows the “command.”

BOOST YOUR HAPPINESS HORMONE

They say that life is like a zebra: a black stripe will inevitably end, and the white stripe will begin. But sometimes it seems that we wander endlessly
along
the black stripe, not crossways. That’s when the nature’s most powerful antidepressant comes handy—and to try it, you don’t need a prescription, and the side effects are only positive.

This antidepressant is called endorphins. It’s actually a group of opioids created naturally in the body. The word “endorphin” itself is built from two words:
endogenous morphins
—that is, narcotic substances produced naturally in the body. Like morphine, endorphins raise the pain threshold and produce sedation and euphoria. Endorphins are responsible for so-called “runner’s high,” which helps athletes push themselves beyond their physical and mental limits, feeling no exhaustion or pain. Endorphins are released during pregnancy, which partially explains postpartum depression as the mother is deprived of endorphins in her system and the nerve-soothing effect of breastfeeding when endorphins are released into her blood. What a timely gift of nature, considering all those sleepless nights and physical and emotional exhaustion during the day!

To achieve a true endorphin kick, you don’t need to exhaust yourself with running spurts. In fact, moderate exercise followed by a relaxation technique—for example, a massage or meditation—also triggers the release of endorphins. Basically, all prolonged rhythmic exercises, such as tennis and aerobics, boost the production of body’s own “happiness hormone.” Meditation, acupuncture, deep diaphragm breathing, even eating spicy food
—
all these simple steps help maintain steady levels of this feel-good chemical in the blood. Certain foods also come in handy, especially stimulating foods such as chili peppers, horseradish, and wasabi.

No wonder exercise is increasingly becoming a part of the treatment of depression and anxiety. Regular physical activity appears
as effective as psychotherapy for treating mild to moderate depression.
⁵
Chinese therapists also report that patients who exercise regularly, especially practicing mind-body exercise such as tai chi, are less likely to experience cognitive decline in old age.
⁶

It appears that nearly any form of exercise can help boost your mood with endorphin release. Some examples of happiness boosting exercise include:

• Biking or spinning class
  
• Nordic walking or uphill walking
  
• Dancing
  
• Golf (but only if you walk instead of using the cart)
  
• Jogging
  
• Aerobics
  
• Kickboxing or martial arts
  
• Tennis
  
• Swimming
  
• Yoga
  

Gardening, yard work (especially mowing or raking), and housework (such as sweeping, mopping, or vacuuming) also count as endorphin-boosting exercises. At least I know now what prompts me to grab a broom when I feel low and the sky is overcast!

Before you begin an exercise program for mood boost, you may ask yourself if there are any particular physical activities you enjoy or if they fit your lifestyle and work schedule. Some people
enjoy working out in a club atmosphere while others opt for lonely runs in the wilderness. Choose an activity you enjoy. Exercising should be fun, otherwise you will not continue.

You also need to be clear about your goals. When you first start your exercise program, it should be easy for you to follow and maintain. For example, if you aim for mood enhancement, then weight loss and improved flexibility will inevitably follow after you begin your workouts in your spare time. But if you are after strong, voluptuous muscles, you will need to be prepared to spend at least an hour every day in the gym. Put your exercise routine into your schedule.

Variety is the key to enjoying life at its fullest. Choose at least three activities from the list above and try to incorporate them into your monthly exercise schedule. Most often, you don’t need to buy health club memberships or expensive equipment to enjoy endorphin-boosting activities. All you need to run is a pair of trainers and a flat surface. All you need to do crunches is a flat surface.

When you have made up your mind to fit some fitness into your life, keep the timer on. It takes about thirty minutes between the start of an exercise and a full release of endorphins, so make sure you time your fitness routine just right. Here are is a simple exercise sequence to boost your happiness naturally with endorphins:

1. TREADMILL: Start with a five-minute warm up at a comfortable speed. Then, every three minutes, increase both the speed and difficulty. Incline the treadmill one increment and increase speed. On a bike, increase the resistance and maintain the same cadence. Do this four times, so that you can exercise for twelve to fifteen minutes with ever-increasing intensity.
   
2. CRUNCHES: The essential move to get your tummy into tip-top shape for bikini season, it’s also one of the most reliable endorphin triggers—although I get a secondary happiness boost when I notice less flabbiness around the waist area! Crunches are tricky, so do them right. Here’s the simplest way to do crunches without hurting your back:
   
   • Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the ground.
     
   • Place your hands behind your head with your elbows out and arms horizontal. Do not bend your arms forward.
     
   • Supporting your head with your hands, squeeze your abs until your upper torso is just off the floor. Pause for one second.
     
   • Slowly release your abs and roll back your spine to the starting position. Do not pull your hands onto your neck.
     
   • As your core muscles become stronger, you can start working your lower abs, completing a crunch with your body bent at a 90-degree angle at the hips, and your legs shooting straight up in the air.
     
   • For optimum endorphin release (and a flatter tummy), complete three sets, twenty repetitions each. Start with ten reps and work your way to twenty.
     
3. WEIGHT LIFTING: You do not need to move a lot of iron to see endorphins in action and your muscles gaining firmness and definition. Spend ten to fifteen minutes waving some dumbbells around (ten to fifteen repetitions for arm muscles). If you are not in the mood for spending lots of money on sports equipment, fill up two textured 1.5 L (1.59 qt) plastic bottles with water and use them as weights on a treadmill. You can add weight to your makeshift dumbbells by stuffing some sand or gravel into the bottles, along with water.