Mastering Multiple Position Sex (34 page)

Brava! Bravo!

Great musical talent is discovered all the time, and your house or apartment is full of sexual scenery waiting to be discovered—and then mounted.

I encourage you to start looking at your furniture, the furniture in your hotel room, even your dinner hostess’s furniture through a new lens. Perhaps the ottoman you just used while reading or watching TV could help you enjoy rear-entry. People joke that home gyms look like torture equipment, so why not use it for light bondage? And a hammock is a surefire way to put more swing in your sex.

“Consider it a loving ritual for you and your partner to christen every room of the house with a different act of intercourse.”

12
^th
Movement
The Standing O: Sex on Two Feet

Popular in the steamy scenes of romantic movies, standing positions evoke thoughts of wild, uncontrollable passion. The physical advantage of these positions is the deep penetration they provide, while the disadvantage has to do with the muscular endurance that the man must possess and the woman’s reliance on the man for her pleasure. Because tiring muscles out can prolong an orgasm, the positions are arranged to use that muscle fatigue to your advantage; therefore, the hardest position opens the set.

12
^th
Movement

POSITION 1

POSITION 2

This Chapter’s Positions and Their Degrees of Difficulty:

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  POSITION 1
: Chair in the Performance Hall

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POSITION 2
: Transition

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  POSITION 3
: The Maypole

Setting the Stage

Stand-up sex, unlike stand-up comedy, should be taken seriously, and even when it happens spontaneously, there are a few important points to consider. For the first position to work, you’ll need a hallway or a wall with enough space in front of it to allow the man to squat to where his legs are parallel to the floor. This also means that the floor must be clean, free of splinters, and not slippery, and the walls should be sturdy enough to support two people and free of any wall hangings that would crush behind his weight. These two positions, as with the positions in the
13th Movement
, are proof that time spent at the gym can improve time spent at home, particularly if the man’s workout includes front squats to strengthen his quadriceps, as well as traditional squats, hamstring curls, leg presses, and leg extensions. This is one chapter where the performer’s physical integrity is just as important as the performance hall.

“This is where ripping clothes off—being mindful to keep them clear of the man’s footing later—not only adds to the excitement, but to the lubrication as well.”

Warm-Up

Because these positions take place in the hallway of your apartment or house—away from your sexually stocked bedside table—there might not be any lubricant on hand, so you will need to bring it or help make it. The key is to recall the “how to make my partner wet without touching them” techniques from the
1st Movement
, followed by some oral body worship.

I suggest you play two games: one called “Radioactive Contaminated Clothes” and the other, “Saliva Cures Radiation Poisoning.” With those two games providing the movie trailer to your lovemaking, clothes will fly off, mouths will lubricate, and juicy hormones will start to flow.

And should the hormones still not bubble over, this is the perfect time for oral sex, both as stimulant and lubricant. He can gradually work his way down to his knees, licking her body as his love elevator goes down to the basement. Suckling her nipples will help lubricate her pussy, as will his manual stimulation of her vulva and vagina. Her hands are free to hold on to his head or to rub herself to get the fluids gushing. She can return the favor, making sure not to bring him to orgasm yet.

To prevent his knees from buckling in the position to come, he should bend at the knees or even lean forward and over her mouth. One key safety point is that he not lock his knees while standing. Soldiers at attention and groomsmen at the altar have passed out because of locked legs.

For partners who enjoy anilingus, either one can turn and face the wall in a police frisking pose, while the other person traces a tongue down the spine to their partner’s back door. With hands against the wall and the body spread eagle, the recipient is getting a tongue lashing of a different sort.

After all the touching, caressing, fondling, and fingering, the couple should be lubed and ready to move on.

POSITION 1

POSITION 1:
Chair in the Performance Hall

The man draws on two sources of strength to make this advanced position work: his legs and the wall. She will enjoy the deep penetration—exciting the inner two-thirds of her vagina—once the two of them have made this advanced position work for them.

In the hallway, lean back so that your back is flat against the wall. Bend so that your thighs are at or slightly above a right angle.

As though you were mounting a pony, lift one leg up and over your mate, as you face him. Lower yourself down onto his hard penis. Depending on your height and that of your partner, this might mean that neither of your feet can touch the floor.

As you concentrate on maintaining balance and support, your hands are free to rest on her hips, play with her breasts, or stroke her back.

You can rock yourself to orgasm, and your hands are free to bring pleasure to you, your partner, or to you both. This position provides deep penetration and unbelievable stimulation for both of you, so if you want these feelings to last, help him work on overstimulating you without overstimulating him.