The Alien Invasion Survival Handbook: A Defense Manual for the Coming Extraterrestrial Apocalypse (8 page)

These extraterrestrial parasites also act as miniature global positioning systems, pinpointing the subject's precise geographical location. Although the method of transmission is still, largely, a mystery, it is thought that they somehow utilize the body's biochemical system to generate sufficient energy to operate as ultra-low frequency transceivers, effectively using the entire body as a mobile transmission tower.

Implants are usually in a state of dormancy, silently recording host data until activated by electromagnetic signals from an alien craft. The implant will then continue to transmit the host's data and position until it is switched off again.

Once removed from the body, implants no longer have a source of power and are immediately deactivated. They also seem to have a built-in self-destruction mechanism, causing them to undergo molecular breakdown within minutes of removal from living human tissue and rendering them useless for further scientific analysis. Attempts to reactivate implants by reinserting them into their original hosts or the bodies of surrogate hosts have proven ineffective.

Implants have been cunningly crafted to broadcast in a wide variety of typical human environments. However, a phenomenon similar to cell phone “drop out” can occur in dense urban areas where there are large concentrations of concrete and steel buildings, which block signals. This, of course, works to our advantage when we wish to conceal our location from our alien foes.

It is important to remember that there are few immediate, telltale signs that you have an alien implant. When you do have one, you won't “feel” any different. You won't set off shop checkout security alarms or start hearing radio broadcasts out of thin air. They are designed for long-term concealment and, in most cases, remain just that.

It is reasonable to assume that you have an implant if you have been abducted on one or more occasions. It is important that all implants (including decoy implants) are removed as soon as possible.

1. DON'T PANIC.
Unless aliens are in hot pursuit, there is generally no reason for immediate concern. Discovering an implant categorically proves that you have been abducted by aliens at some time in your life, and that you could again be taken at any time. Most people with alien implants have unknowingly had them for decades without any ill effect. Physiologically, they are no more dangerous than having a splinter. They should, however, be located and removed as soon as possible.

2. IF BEING PURSUED, SEEK IMMEDIATE SHELTER.
Signals from alien implants are incapable of penetrating through more than a few feet of soil. This makes subways, disused mines, sewers, and any other such subterranean tunnel ideal for short-term or long-term shelter. The shielding effect of soil has been known for many years and has been used to great effect by a large number of people seeking immediate respite from alien harassment. The real threat of any subterranean environment comes not from pursuing aliens, but from the environment itself. Venturing into disused mines and cave systems should only be attempted by those with suitable speleological experience and equipment.

FIGURE 2.4:
Seek underground shelter when evading pursuit by aliens.

While hiding, remember:

 


• You can be pursued by aliens for at least 300 feet within an underground cavern.
  

 


• The deeper you hide, the better.
  

 


• The underground system you have entered should have more than one exit point. The aliens could be waiting for you when you come out.
  

3. ONCE YOU'RE IN A SECURE ENVIRONMENT, CONDUCT A THOROUGH SELF-EXAMINATION.
Examine your body for any unexplained scars. Entry wounds are usually very small and discreet, or not visible at all. Implants are generally no larger than a grain of rice and come in shapes ranging from triangular to spherical. They can be located anywhere in the body. Subcutaneous implants are most readily identifiable, often felt as a small lump under the skin. Many people with these implants may mistake them for a deep splinter that they never remember getting. Skin surface implants are generally close to incision points. These incision points may, however, be virtually invisible. Stouthearted individuals in a tight situation may attempt removal of superficial implants with implements they may have at hand, such as a pocketknife or nail clippers. Remember to sterilize your equipment thoroughly before self-operation and dress the wound upon completion. Deeper implants will not be detectable by a casual examination.

4. IF AVAILABLE, USE A HANDHELD METER.
A gaussmeter is a handheld device used for measuring the intensity of magnetic fields. When used to scan your body, it may indicate any electromagnetic disruptions, thereby defining areas for closer examination. Stud finders have also been used in the field on a number of occasions to locate a variety of superficial implants. Both these meters are available at hardware stores.

5. CONSULT YOUR RADIOLOGIST.
Book yourself an appointment for a full-body X-ray at the first opportunity. Some implants are located deep within the body and cannot be found by a superficial examination. Many implants are discovered by accident when radiologists have been X-raying for unrelated reasons. Most hosts are unaware that they have an implant.

FIGURE 2.5:
A routine X-ray may reveal hidden alien implants.

6. SEEK MEDICAL HELP.
Deep implants require surgical removal and a local or general anesthetic. Surgical procedures should only be carried out by trained professionals.

7. SEND REMOVED IMPLANTS OFF FOR ANALYSIS.
When removed, the implant may be covered with a sticky, gray, fibrous membrane. Do not remove this membrane. Have your surgeon place the implant in a sterile container and send it off for chemical analysis. You should find the results very interesting — that is, if government agencies ever allow you to see them.

Once you have mastered the personal skills required to block alien mind control, you must consider the defense of your own home. Statistics reveal that a growing number of abductions occur from personal dwellings. You may wonder if it is indeed possible to protect yourself within your home from these interstellar intruders. The answer is yes … to a degree.

Some are of the opinion that if aliens have traveled halfway across the galaxy to abduct us, then they are hardly likely to let a few bricks and a pane of glass stop them. This is not necessarily true. Contrary to popular mythology, aliens cannot materialize out of thin air in the middle of your living room. They cannot pass through walls or closed windows unscathed. You cannot be drawn up on a beam of light into their spacecraft. Aliens are bound by the same laws of physics that we are.

While at home, you have a tactical advantage: Nobody knows your home better than you do. All the necessary preparations can be made to preempt any incursion. Your home can be a place of refuge. Yet, your home need not be a fortress. A few simple precautions will greatly reduce the risk of waking up in the night with an alien squatting on your chest.

Although no home is absolutely secure from alien attack, there are some precautions that can reduce your vulnerability. These measures are not dissimilar to those recommended by police to protect your home from human intruders. Make sure you have:

 


• Deadlocks on all external doors
  

 


• Security bars on windows and doors
  

 


• A high perimeter fence surrounding your property
  

 


• Movement-activated external floodlights
  

 


• Guard dogs
  

 


• Tempered glass on all windows
  

 


• A backup power supply
  

Electromagnetic Sensors

In addition to the tactics mentioned above, the most effective domestic early warning system is a network of electromagnetic sensors placed at strategic locations around your property. These sensors register fluctuations in electromagnetic radiation levels associated with the close proximity of alien spacecraft. When triggered, alarms will provide you with sufficient time to prepare for an attack. Sometimes just the sound of an alarm will deter an alien attack. However, do not assume this to always be the case. At the sound of an alarm, you may have less than thirty seconds to prepare. Always err on the side of caution.

In many cases, household pets may sense fluctuations in electromagnetic levels before electronic sensors will. Do not ignore abnormal behavior. If your dog suddenly goes quiet or disappears after a frenzy of barking, you know it's time to swing into action.

Emergency Evacuation Plan

Although the safest course of action during an alien attack is to barricade yourself in your home, it may be necessary under some circumstances to evacuate the building as quickly as possible. Situations in which this would be advised include fire, dangerous electromagnetic radiation levels, and being overrun by superior numbers of invading extraterrestrials. It is important that each household member has a thorough knowledge of evacuation procedures, and spontaneous evacuation drills should be conducted on a regular basis. Your procedure should be as routine as taking out the trash. Delegate specific tasks to individual family members. Remember, when outside, you and your family are easy targets. Always demonstrate extreme caution.

In a successful emergency evacuation plan, it is important that each family member be aware of the following:

 


• Exit points, both primary and alternate
  

 


• Designated gathering point
  

 


• Evacuation routes, both interior and exterior
  

 


• Location of pre-packed survival kits
  

 


• Location and training in a range of weapons
  

 


• Techniques for deployment of decoys and booby traps
  

 


• Audio-Morphic defense principles
  

Home Audio System

Your home audio system need not be the top of the range, but it must be reliable, easy to access, and able to be heard from all parts of your home. Audio-Phonic Resonance defense systems rely on a volume of 100 decibels or more to be effective against alien electroparalysis. Make sure your home audio system is capable of sustained play at this minimum level of volume. Anything less and you risk being just another warm slab of meat on a cold operating table.